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-   -   Are you invisible? (https://britishexpats.com/forum/barbie-92/you-invisible-655255/)

BadgeIsBack Feb 16th 2010 9:01 pm

Are you invisible?
 
A mate who is about 50 tells me that you come invisible - people don't see you any more - at a certain age...(around middle age - he is very philosophical and positive about it).

He tells me that it can be particularly stressing for women.

Never thought about it! Anyone understand, or have first-hand experience of this or even commit the crime without realising?

Lorna at Vicenza Feb 16th 2010 9:16 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 
I think I'm too loud to ever really become invisible - I did once however feel as if I'd lost a sense of my personal individuality. It happened when I met and started dating my OH. I realised that a lot of my friends, especially the single ones, stopped phoning to ask me what I was doing on Friday or Saturday night etc or ringing to tell me what was going on over the weekend. They just presumed (wrongly) that OH and I would be spending all our time together and have none for anybody else.
I made sure that they all knew I was still me and still wanted to go out and party with them. This could just have been an Italian thing though as lots of women here do become invisible when they settle down and/or marry.

Peepster Feb 16th 2010 9:18 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 
God that's awful. Thinking about it, I don't think I particularly 'look' at older people, say over 50. I am an offender!!! I will have to rectify, starting tomorrow. Getting old sucks :thumbdown:

LaLaLayla Feb 16th 2010 9:18 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 
Well, here's a [cringe-worthy] alternative to becoming invisible...


odyssey Feb 16th 2010 9:22 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 
ooooh don't - you have no idea how much I don't need this thread!!!!

BadgeIsBack Feb 16th 2010 9:23 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 

Originally Posted by Lorna at Vicenza (Post 8350092)
I think I'm too loud to ever really become invisible - I did once however feel as if I'd lost a sense of my personal individuality. It happened when I met and started dating my OH. I realised that a lot of my friends, especially the single ones, stopped phoning to ask me what I was doing on Friday or Saturday night etc or ringing to tell me what was going on over the weekend. They just presumed (wrongly) that OH and I would be spending all our time together and have none for anybody else.
I made sure that they all knew I was still me and still wanted to go out and party with them. This could just have been an Italian thing though as lots of women here do become invisible when they settle down and/or marry.

Not your personality or how you behave in a social setting. You walk into a room, lift or down a street, or board a train.

Do people notice? Or they acknowledge, but do they notice..

I suggest that if people think about it - they might surprise themselves.

LaLaLayla Feb 16th 2010 9:23 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 

Originally Posted by odyssey (Post 8350116)
ooooh don't - you have no idea how much I don't need this thread!!!!

My theory is that the over 50s become invisible because they insist on wearing so much beige... don't wear beige, and you'll be fine :thumbup:

BadgeIsBack Feb 16th 2010 9:25 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 

Originally Posted by Peepster (Post 8350100)
God that's awful. Thinking about it, I don't think I particularly 'look' at older people, say over 50. I am an offender!!! I will have to rectify, starting tomorrow. Getting old sucks :thumbdown:

If anything older people get the respect they deserve. It's the old-middle aged (50 odd?) and particularly women who cop it.

I think I have read about this before. Does that person in the office yak to the 35 year old woman, but not the 52 year old?

Lord_Farquar Feb 16th 2010 9:34 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 

Originally Posted by Bambi in Sydney (Post 8350104)
Well, here's a [cringe-worthy] alternative to becoming invisible...

http://youtube.com/watch?v=Ku-UlZHvnss

Threesome?

Lorna at Vicenza Feb 16th 2010 9:42 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 

Originally Posted by BadgeIsBack (Post 8350038)
A mate who is about 50 tells me that you come invisible - people don't see you any more - at a certain age...(around middle age - he is very philosophical and positive about it).

He tells me that it can be particularly stressing for women.

Never thought about it! Anyone understand, or have first-hand experience of this or even commit the crime without realising?

Just had a thought - if we had all ignored your thread, would you have started to feel invisible ? :lol:

NickyC Feb 16th 2010 9:42 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 
Yup, I've experienced that. I fit the age and gender criteria (unfortunately). It's dependent on where I am but I'm definitely extremely invisible at work.

I'm currently contracting again (been there four months this time) in a mammoth open-plan office which is mainly staffed by people in their late twenties, early thirties. The people I actually deal with on a regular basis are OK but a lot of the others are downright rude. They never make eye-contact, they look away if they do happen to catch my eye and they wouldn't speak in a million years. And these are people who've seen me every day for four months :eek:. And the women are much worse than the blokes.

And I never wear beige ;). I'm one of the few people in the place who wears colours - most of the girls wear ghastly, dreary black outfits day in, day out..

northernbird Feb 16th 2010 9:48 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 

Originally Posted by Peepster (Post 8350100)
God that's awful. Thinking about it, I don't think I particularly 'look' at older people, say over 50. I am an offender!!! I will have to rectify, starting tomorrow. Getting old sucks :thumbdown:

I am intrigued by your recent posts, how old are you???

Margaret3 Feb 16th 2010 9:50 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 

Originally Posted by BadgeIsBack (Post 8350038)
A mate who is about 50 tells me that you come invisible - people don't see you any more - at a certain age...(around middle age - he is very philosophical and positive about it).

He tells me that it can be particularly stressing for women.

Never thought about it! Anyone understand, or have first-hand experience of this or even commit the crime without realising?




Absolutely, it has happened to me prematurely at the age of 45, i work with heaps of young nurse and they appear to think any other nurse over the age of 40 is a complete idiot,

try being 45 with a scottish accent at work, not only are you invisible but you seem to be impossible to hear and are completely ignored most of the time.

During the course of my day i usually have to answer the docs phones and pagers and relay messages to them , in which they ignore me totally, so i got back to the phone and say i have give doctor ABC the message and they have not replied to it, therfore there is nothing else i can do!

odyssey Feb 16th 2010 9:50 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 

Originally Posted by northernbird (Post 8350188)
I am intrigued by your recent posts, how old are you???

I guess young. Under 30 and over 24 :)

Peepster Feb 16th 2010 9:59 pm

Re: Are you invisible?
 

Originally Posted by northernbird (Post 8350188)
I am intrigued by your recent posts, how old are you???

34. Why?


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