Re: Indonesian Executions
 

Would you describe your daughter as a dropkick loser if she were addicted???? Bit of a ****ish attitude really, most addicts, smokers, drugs, even alcaholics become addicted when they're either young and impressionable, or at a low in their life. The only non-victims are the smugglers and pushers.

There's no deterrent anymore, that's the problem, life doesn't mean life even. 15 years in they can say ooh look at me I've found God and I'm rehabilitated. One way and one way only to assure no re-offence, murderers, paedophiles, rapists and drug smugglers. Put the lot of em down, not wanted in a civilized society.

Re: Indonesian Executions
 

Yes I would! I use that exact term to describe her "waste of oxygen" partner that spends her rent & food money on his habit. I watch with sadness as my grand kids wear rags & shoes with holes in because there's never any money to clothe them unless we buy it for them. My daughter has moved house over 20 times in 10 years because he runs up a drug debt or she can't pay the rent. My granddaughter had been to 7 schools by the time she was 7. He's a dropkick loser that has just about sucked every bit of self respect from my daughter.
This is the same waste of space that instead of getting a job to give his kids some holiday money when we took them to the U.K last year decided to steal the food money from her purse to buy an 8 ball of speed to deal to his mates but ended up sharing it with them all instead. The same bloke that has his 5 year old trained to hide the bong if the cops come to the door & the same bloke that sold his 10 yr olds Nintendo for a few buds of hydro.
So yes when you've lived with an addict in the family for 12 years like I have then you can perhaps understand why I loathe them.
He's not a victim, he's not at a low in his life, quite the opposite he's on a permanent high. He's Peter Pan the 41yr old boy that never grew up & became an adult. He loves his lifestyle, he has bourbon for breakfast & a few cones for lunch. A nap in the afternoon & a few more cones for tea.

Re: Indonesian Executions
 

I was about to say something regarding finding God and being paedophiles but I was afraid it wouldn't go down too well with my local parish priest :lol:

Re: Indonesian Executions
 

So what are you? a victim or a bystander? I'd have gladly done time to rid my daughter of someone like that

Re: Indonesian Executions
 

Sorry to hear about that. My brother was just like that for a very long time. Very upsetting for our family and we really had no one to blame other than ourselves and him. All good now though. Opportunity to start his own business sorted him out.

Can't blame a drug runner, dealer or the like for my brothers action. When supply was short things were even worse. Beg, steal, fight and the like to get the gear. It was his problem to solve (or mine in the end as I put him into a business) but his head had to get right all by himself.

Re: Indonesian Executions
 

Yes and then your grand kids, that idolize their dad, would never speak to you again. It's a double edged sword, the times we've wanted to dob him in & be rid of him are numerous. Our daughter stood up to him a couple of years ago after he tried to strangle her in a drunken rage. She threw a plate at him, cut him under his eye. He phoned the cops & she now has a DVO against her.
She won't leave him, the kids love him. I have considered retribution as you said but it's made abundantly clear that I'd never see her or the kids again. My son & several of his navy mates paid a social call one weekend and had a quiet word with him, no violence whatsoever. Just a show of strength. She's cut him out of her life completely & doesn't acknowledge having a sibling any longer.
We feed them & clothe them, we have code words with the eldest one to be sure she has food to eat & the violence hasn't begun again. We used to visit every week, to stop that they [he] moved to them to NSW 6 hours drive away. The kids go to a remote school, only 14 kids in the entire school, so we know that they are looked after at school. Kids are happy there & thriving for the first time in years. Sometimes you just don't rock the boat.
A few years ago we simply thought she'd grow out of him or become fed up of the lifestyle. It hasn't happened as yet.

Re: Indonesian Executions
 

You've been through so much for her and the kids, I agree, you are more use this way to her and especially them, who didn't ask to be born into such a weird lifestyle. Getting locked up for disposing of the waster wouldn't help the rest of the family at all. Its a difficult and heartbreaking situation :thumbdown:

Re: Indonesian Executions
 

I don't even know the bloke but I'll still help if you change your mind. Here's an example of where I'm coming from in the victim stakes. My mate Jason was introduced to heroin by his dads brother when he was 16...yes 16, and it was all free til he was hooked. He's been an addict for the last 35 years, done some terrible things including stealing from family. Who's to blame ultimately, the pusher or the addict?

To be fair your **** in law sounds like a total grub, worth risking your relationship with your daughter and the Grandkids to give them a chance at life without him? I don't know the situation well enough, but fairly close by the sounds of it.

Re: Indonesian Executions
 

That is such a naive and dumb comment. That lowlife is his grandchildren's father. He's the partner of his daughter whether she's happy with him or not. So Cresta 'gets rid of' said lowlife; he then does time ie no wages coming in so his wife struggles to pay the bills, possibly losing the house they built together, lose the business they built together. He doesn't get to see or sleep with his wife for years, he doesn't see his daughter or his grandchildren for years, possibly ever because they can't forgive him for taking daddy away from them blah blah blah. I understand the emotion behind your comment but seriously, it's dumb.

My eldest is with a ****wit. He's not a drug addict, he's not an alcoholic, he doesn't physically abuse her but he's a waste of space, an obnoxious shit who mentally abuses her. We can't say or do anything for fear of losing her. We have to be here for her, accept (whilst not understanding) that she apparently loves him and basically suck it up and hope she comes to her senses eventually. Our situation is relatively mild, I can't even begin to imagine how Cresta and Cresta's Conscience deal with their situation.

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Its not a question of risking their relationhip with her, its a question of how t carry on if Cresta did do somethng and ended up behind bars. Thats an income gone which provides a lot for the kids, thats contact lost between him and the kids, whole family in tattters, and the daughter left to do what she wants with the kids - including possibly picking up with yet another lowlife and then there's oly Cresta's Conscience to look out for them next time.
Taking the law into his own hands would help no-one.

I have a drug addict and pusher in my family too. We gave up trying to help him years ago when he made it clear he preferred to stay as a pusher and an addict, rather than become someone on the decent side of society. He's the only one to blame, every time he got clean he came out of jail my parents set him up with a home and furniture and money, sold the lot and went straight back onto the hard stuff.
Whenever I hear he's got nicked now I just shrug, his life, he chose it. I have no sympathy, ran out of that years ago. And at least when he is inside he's not pushing drugs outside schools.

Re: Indonesian Executions
 

.

These personal stories are humbling; thank god no member of our families was in that sort of relationship.

It all comes down to personal responsibility. With the exception of babies born addicted and very young children, surely no-one can claim today they are not at least aware that could end up in a dreadful state by experimenting with these chemicals?

.

Re: Indonesian Executions
 

Full respect, Cresta. You have thought it out and have made the right decision. One day your grandchildren will weep with pride that they had such a loving and caring granddad.

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Don't normally agree with your comments gordon, but on this occasion well said. Good luck to you cresta, IMHO you are going about it in the best way.

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When you put it like that, it sounds almost appealing Pen :eek: :rofl:

Steve, I've thought long & hard about their situation I really have. I used to plan his ultimate demise in my head for long into the nights. Ultimately, until she makes a conscious decision to rid him from their lives, it's something we have to learn to cope with. She's left him several times, swore never to return, yet they always end up reconciled. The kids both know they can come & live here any time they want, as does our daughter. As I said earlier we have measures in place that ensure the kids are as safe as we can make them. We never give any money to them, instead we pay for clothing, groceries, phone credit etc that way he can't use it for drug money. They came up for Easter holidays & we kitted them out with winter clothing and decent shoes, coats etc. I/we can't make her choose, just like an addict she has to want to quit him.
He'll never change. I paint him quite black as he is a drop kick loser that would spend every cent on pot & piss etc. He is a reasonable dad despite his habit. He adores the kids and has never lifted a finger to them [that's why he's still breathing] He spends a lot of time with them, they love him to bits, he's genuinely funny & quick witted when he wants to be, he's the original party boy. I just wish he'd grow up & become a responsible adult, the 10 yr old is more mature then him.

Re: Indonesian Executions
 

There are a lot of people out there who people consider losers. People say a leopard can never change its spots, which in some cases is very true, in other cases completely false. I saw Mike Tyson sitting at the boxing today. Now that guy had a pretty scummy past. Now before the feminists pipe up here, this guy has actually turned his life around. His roadshow is something to see. A great example how some prison time can turn pure evil into something remorseful who doesn't want to return to the bad old days. Sometimes a good kick in the teeth does wonders.