This has been a question at the back of my mind for quite a while, but I've not actually asked or dared ask myself it in any serious way.

Basho's last post made me think about it.

How does one go on afterwards ? Doesn't bare thinking about. Not that any clouds are on our horizons... except we are both coming up to 60.

My uncle died within 2 days of my Aunt dieing.... I reckon I know why...

Anyone know anyone thats been through that and survived ?

If it happens, you carry on. Life is a learning process and you learn from it.

I'm just a few years younger than you. If you're healthy, not unusual to live to 90 or more these days, so that would be another 30 years. That is a very long time. Use wisely

Holy Buddha Ozzy,put those thoughts to the very back of yer mind mate,NOW

My Dad died when my Mum was 40 she got married again age 60 but those 20 years in between we're very tough! Basically as with all problems you keep going one day at a time x

I'm a great believer in life goes on. You can't change what is inevitable so there is no point worrying about it. Also what's to say that there isn't another soul mate out there. They have died, not you, so live the life you have left to the fullest. Harsh but I don't fancy the alternative

I was widowed almost 17 years ago.

You carry on, it's all you can do.

Some good answers there.... I think yesterday what was at the back of my mind I dared ask myself quite firmly for the first time..... Must be finally feeling my age. Probably conincides with the first day of all of my kids being out of the house at the same time and all working at the same time ever. I think it was a freedom is finally just around the corner moment and what can go wrong. Been parents of youngsters for 31 years now.

Particuarly like Hebe's response

If I lost my wife I would be quite peeved...

she is irreplaceable not because there is noone with her talent, poise or beauty but because there is only one of her and a replacement would take time to get to know...

I actually think I might outlive her. I could probably deal with it in old-age but any loss before that would be devastating. If she came to an premature, untimely end then I would pack the kids off overseas to their Aunts and Uncles (one is childless and has a country house) and consider my next move.

Really!!!!!

what other option would I have?

If this was the case scenario then your children would be devastated at losing their mother let alone being shipped off to a foreign country and 'losing' their father - surely you would do what most people do when faced with this situation, which is to care for them yourself and to buy in the necessary help as as when it is needed.

they would be very happy to have their other mothers around....they love the travel and the differences...
you're right though, the 'bounty' would fund me going with them....and staying...

The nuclear family unit is very strong, and gets augmented overseas, myself on my own would not provide enough stability..I would be time poor....

but we would alternate between countries..my foreign languages are not good enough for me to possibly get work. But my kids are bilingual and happy in either country. There might even be something in them staying there as they would get a good education and still be surrounded by family...or they can go to boarding school here and spend the vacation over there.

I reckon she will just run off with someone who is not such a dic....

Are you happily married, Jad? It's great mate. :_)
Nothing wrong with liking the person you have chosen.

Words fail me sometimes.

The simple truth is, no matter how much you idly consider the possibility (or how much you plan for such a turn of events) you have no idea how you would react if you lost someone you thought would always be there.

None.