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What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

Old May 15th 2013, 5:46 am
  #31  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

Originally Posted by ozzieeagle View Post
I really wish I could think like this..... Or maybe I dont.

Badge asked a very important question before..... "Does time heal" ? It's not one I'd ever be game to ask face to face.

I guess personal reaction is personal reaction and one cannot really know how they are going to react until they go through it. It's just that I dont reckon I'd be able to and maybe that thought should seek me to get help ? I can put it at the back of my mind however I've a feeling now I've asked it out loud it's going to be a prominent thought or fear.

Anyone else feel like this... I do realise everyone thinks differently.
I wasn't being serious

I love my wife deeply

I've never thought about it to be honest. Rightly or wrongly, I don't dwell on things like this
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Old May 15th 2013, 6:22 am
  #32  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

Originally Posted by Hebe View Post
Ozzie. One thing is certain in life and that is death. Focus on living while you can - it's a privilege denied to many
which is why it's great to maintain relationships,keep options open but keep one eye on the horizon.....even when people criticise the way you live or the way you look at life.....
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Old May 15th 2013, 6:27 am
  #33  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

Originally Posted by Amazulu View Post
I wasn't being serious

my wife deeply

I've never thought about it to be honest. Rightly or wrongly, I don't dwell on things like this
I also have a life insurance policy and also joke about it. Besides that is what life insurance is for.....

I don't dwell on it, but it has been talked about....today is the first time i've publicly talked about it. I can count on my fans to take what I have written as negative regardless as to whether I am serious or not....
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Old May 15th 2013, 9:09 am
  #34  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

I went to a funeral today. One of our Inspectors at work. He went to work one day last week and dropped dead. He was only 47. Really nice guy, really funny, always had good stories and loved telling them. Was happy to talk to the 'troops' wasn't at all standoffish.

I was proud to be part of the Police family at the funeral. The guard of Honour was massive. And the bagpipes always bring a tear to my eye.

His wife said some lovely things about him and did a great job of holding it together. I don't know if I'd be able to do the same.

It certainly makes you think about the fragility of life.

I try not to think about it though, and just concentrate on the husband and I enjoying our life together and making the most of everything as much as we can.

Last edited by Scubaemma; May 15th 2013 at 9:10 am. Reason: Typo
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Old May 15th 2013, 11:14 am
  #35  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

My dad died in 1977 and my mum in 2008, and she rarely mentioned him in all those years. With Alzheimers creeping on she eventually forgot who he was, and I had to remove a photograph of him from her nursing home room because she didn't want the strange man looking at her. Very sad.
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Old May 15th 2013, 3:40 pm
  #36  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

This is something me and my husband have had to discuss in great depth on what we would do if either of us passed on . Unfortunately with my husbands job he is at a high risk of this being a reality. We both think I would cope better on my own with the kids as a lot of the time I do already as he is away so much. However if anything were to happen to me then he would put all the boys in boarding school and ensure he was not away over school holidays. Currently only the eldest boards but he loves it.

We have both said we want each other to find love again. We have been together since we were teens and we have learned to just take each day at a time. I hope we both grow to be old and doddery together . But if I lost him doing the job he loves a big part of me would die with him but I would carry on living.
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Old May 15th 2013, 3:56 pm
  #37  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

Originally Posted by geordie mandy View Post
This is something me and my husband have had to discuss in great depth on what we would do if either of us passed on . Unfortunately with my husbands job he is at a high risk of this being a reality. We both think I would cope better on my own with the kids as a lot of the time I do already as he is away so much. However if anything were to happen to me then he would put all the boys in boarding school and ensure he was not away over school holidays. Currently only the eldest boards but he loves it.

We have both said we want each other to find love again. We have been together since we were teens and we have learned to just take each day at a time. I hope we both grow to be old and doddery together . But if I lost him doing the job he loves a big part of me would die with him but I would carry on living.
Mandy
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Old May 16th 2013, 12:22 am
  #38  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

Originally Posted by Hebe View Post
If this was the case scenario then your children would be devastated at losing their mother let alone being shipped off to a foreign country and 'losing' their father - surely you would do what most people do when faced with this situation, which is to care for them yourself and to buy in the necessary help as as when it is needed.

What they are happy with now when they are feeling secure knowing they have both parents to go back to is most likely not going to be the same scenario when they are grieving at the loss of one and the other seems to want to palm them off on other people (no matter how close they are to them now).
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Old May 16th 2013, 2:20 am
  #39  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

I worry about the same, not often but occasionally. My husband and I are close, just about to celebrate 15 yrs of married life, couple more on top of that together.

My parents didn't become a happy partnership until my brother and I left home so I don't take happy marriages for granted.

A friend lost her husband and three children in a car accident a few years ago, she was sole survivor, and the driver. Heart breaking, but if she can keep going, anyone can. She now has a new partner etc

I've been lucky in love, for that I'm thankful but it doesn't mean I think it can only happen once.
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Old May 16th 2013, 2:56 am
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

Originally Posted by scotdownunder View Post

What they are happy with now when they are feeling secure knowing they have both parents to go back to is most likely not going to be the same scenario when they are grieving at the loss of one and the other seems to want to palm them off on other people (no matter how close they are to them now).
I think I have made it quite clear that this is family wanting to surround them with love, support, and indeed material protection, and the only uncertainly is what happens to the old man (me) as the question is do I keep them here on my own or do they get me and their family elsewhere. Remember that my children already have a lot to do with their family and travel. It has come up in discussion, it is a real planning possibility.

I did say that this might have to happen whilst I/we decide what happens next - over 2 countries.

My wife's family are far more numerous than mine, far tighter knit, and there are plenty of Aunts who have indicated they see themselves as defacto carers. I have also indicated I own property so it's not even a financial reliance.

It's a funny one - on the one hand this forum trumpets the meaning and tightness of the family group but as soon as I underline the importance of family then people see it as 'palming off'!!
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Old May 16th 2013, 3:37 am
  #41  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

Originally Posted by BadgeIsBack View Post
It's a funny one - on the one hand this forum trumpets the meaning and tightness of the family group but as soon as I underline the importance of family then people see it as 'palming off'!!
i think its the nature of forums and the people that post on them

if you were to say something was black three people would agree and another three would say its white, i tend to take peoples opinions with a pinch of salt
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Old May 16th 2013, 3:57 am
  #42  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

Originally Posted by steve`o View Post
i think its the nature of forums and the people that post on them

if you were to say something was black three people would agree and another three would say its white, i tend to take peoples opinions with a pinch of salt
I know, but sometimes people seem to lack comprehension...even after it has been spelt out in black and white, I can see my initial comments were likely to be misinterpreted by a few....but then to spell out a situation, word by word.....

I'm only putting the facts straight for the record. it's otherwise not important....
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Old May 16th 2013, 12:14 pm
  #43  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

Originally Posted by aries View Post
My dad died in 1977 and my mum in 2008, and she rarely mentioned him in all those years. With Alzheimers creeping on she eventually forgot who he was, and I had to remove a photograph of him from her nursing home room because she didn't want the strange man looking at her. Very sad.
That is really sad. My grandparents were so very close and were married for over 60 years. When he died she literally 'lost it' mentally and ended up in a home; didn't even go to his funeral. Ok physically but totally shut off/closed down. She died about a year later. We didn't know if she couldn't cope with talking about him or if indeed she had had a mental breakdown.

I was widowed in my 20's but I don't talk about it much.
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Old May 16th 2013, 1:12 pm
  #44  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

Originally Posted by BadgeIsBack View Post
I think I have made it quite clear that this is family wanting to surround them with love, support, and indeed material protection, and the only uncertainly is what happens to the old man (me) as the question is do I keep them here on my own or do they get me and their family elsewhere. Remember that my children already have a lot to do with their family and travel. It has come up in discussion, it is a real planning possibility.

I did say that this might have to happen whilst I/we decide what happens next - over 2 countries.

My wife's family are far more numerous than mine, far tighter knit, and there are plenty of Aunts who have indicated they see themselves as defacto carers. I have also indicated I own property so it's not even a financial reliance.

It's a funny one - on the one hand this forum trumpets the meaning and tightness of the family group but as soon as I underline the importance of family then people see it as 'palming off'!!
And would you children have a say in this? What if they chose to stay with you?

I understand your wanting to ensure they are secure and in familiar surroundings etc while you try to make proper arrangements, but I think the reaction was because your initial post indicated this would be a permanent thing, not a temporary one.
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Old May 16th 2013, 11:55 pm
  #45  
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Default Re: What happens if you lose your soul partner ?

I had to mull this question over last year when my wife was diagnosed with cancer. Fortunately she's recovered so I don't have to worry about it. My thoughts though if the worst had happened came down to wether I would try to meet someone else but to be honest I found dating to be such a dreadful experience the first time round that I really don't think I could bring myself to do it again. I'm only 37 but I have so much money I would genuinely worry that people would be interested in that rather than me where as my wife knew me poor so it's never been an issue.
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