Howdy doody folks! My name is Becci and I have a query.

I love the US. I have visited America loads of times in the past, always for holidays- well, I did Camp America at 18 with a J-1 visa, but other than that I've always been a tourist.

However, on my last holiday to the US (Burning Man), I met someone. Someone who took my breath away, his name is Karl and we just clicked... it was magic. It was literally love at first sight. We are in constant contact and honestly, its getting to the point where not being together just isnt an option. And I am more than willing to move to the US!

I am an estimator here in Nottingham for a multi-National Construction company which bodes well in terms of 'specialist skill' employment, but in terms of visas I feel uncomfortable trying to get a marriage or fiance visa (whatever they are) because I need to spend a couple of months living in in LA and just seeing if LA is right for us (Karl is more than happy to move to the UK too) and honestly, I'd rather work and pay tax and support myself than rush into a marriage visa which may put too much pressure on a new yet amazing relationship.

Also, I have an Aunt in San Jose (Karl lives in LA) who could sponsor me... actually what is a sponsor? What do they do? Is it easier to do the whole fiance thing? I have a great job which is quite specialist... lots of qualifications... I don't want to have to rely on anyone but myself you see. Argh... I have so many questions! Hi everybody. Any advice you have would be very welcome! Thanks! Becci.

Ps. I won't have to become a US citizen will I? I'm a proud Brit and would totally fail the citizenship test (I don't know what they say can you see by the dawns early light, and I thought in 1776 the Pilgrims landed on fragle rock)

For most people, it's get married or forget it. I doubt you'll be much different from what you've written.

When you've spent years and $$$ dealing with USCIS, you'll quickly see the advantage of becoming a dual citizen.

You already have a well-paid job, presumably. You don't say anything about Karl's. If he hasn't, your choice of initial country should be obvious.

Karl works for CBS in Hollywood. He is an only child and never left the US whereas I have travelled quite a bit and having worked in Minnesota for 6 months (which I loved but really missed tea and self-depricating humour) I just feel in a better position go over to the US.

I could probably support myself for a month and not work and just see how Karl and I get on... I just want to see how we get on, marriage isn't something I want to engage in jsut to get a visa.

Are you saying that work sponsorship is very difficult to get?

no it doesn't

If you fit in a category, it's very easy. An experienced multinational accountant with one of the big accounting firms or a biotechnology PhD, for example, and I'd say you'll be here as fast as you can pack your bags.

But from what you've written so far, I'd doubt it will provide a path for you to live and work in the USA.

I suggest the OP visits Karl on a tourist visa and that Karl then visits her in the UK. It seems awfully early to be talking visas and moving to other countries. If the relationship continues then you can talk about visas. I don't see an easy way for either of you to work in the others country without getting a company to sponsor you (very difficult) or going the marriage route.

This year's Burning Man just ended a few weeks ago. Are you only knowing Karl for a few weeks??? Or is this a long term relationship from a holiday years ago?

1. Have you visited Karl yet in LA? Maybe a visit could be the first step. You need to find out his LIFE before committing to following him by giving up YOUR life.
2. Get a background check on him. Let's be safe here.
3. Many of us went through long distance relationships and absences... You may be considering marriage but you don't know is LIFE beyond calls and computer screen. I think it unwise to end what you say is a specialist career in UK until some time has passed and visits back and forth happen. Karl needs to spend a lot of time in UK with you, too, to know your family and life as well. You seem to imply Karl is naive of the world...is he really willing to give up everything to move to the UK immediately? Words and actions are two wholly exclusive concepts...he can visit up to six months without a visa whereas you can visit for up to 90 days.

JMHO but I think visas to live here should not be your first step in this.

Even so, coming over on your own will be quite impossible, as you've been already told. It's not that easy to proclaim speciality and go pick up a visa.

Why not some face to face time with this guy first? Sorry to sound preachy or maternal, but non face to face relationships are very easy.... I worry more for your abandoning YOUR life for someone you really do not know. Isn't of a value of Burning Man self-reliance? Be sure to take care of yourself and Karl should be understanding of this.

Bomjeito thank you so much!!!!

Yeah, you are completely right it has only been a few weeks, however I've obviously had relationships before but this one is completely different. I know it sounds crazy to say I fell in love in a week but it has happened.

You are completely right, we should visit each other first. Im going to LA for a week in 2 weeks and he's coming to me in November and then we are spending Christmas together... that is why I was asking about temporary visa's or something because I want to get to know him during boring times, when we both work, have meals and go to bed- the run of the mill stuff. I knew that visas take months so maybe if I got the ball rolling now, in 9 months to a year when I definately wanted to move over it would all be sorted...

You are right though. Argh its just so hard! I sound like a lovesick teenager don't I? Thanks for the advice though!

LA life can seem very glamorous until you're actually here as well.

I also advise you to slow down.

Which division of CBS does Karl work in? Perhaps he could get a transfer to the London office.

Visa's can be hard to get but I was able to secure a H1-b visa with a bachelors degree and no work experience so it can be done. if you have a degree then you would need to find a company that is willing to sponsor your visa. Your degree will need to be related to the position along with your work experience. I agree with others that you probably will be best visiting first before jumping into anything so quickly.

If this is a world-wide company with offices in the USA, you can look into getting a transfer. It would be an L-1 visa. Approach your employer about it. That would be the easiest way for you to spend more time in the USA without having to get married.

Specialist employement visas are P or O visas. Do some research on those and see if you qualify.

Those are visas based on your marriage to a USC. You either come to the USA as a fiance and get married within 90 days of your arrival, or you get married first and then get a spouse immigrant visa. If you've only known this guy for a few weeks, it's too early to think of either one of those.

An Aunt is not a close enough relative to sponsor you for an Immigrant Visa, so that route is out. "Sponsor" means different things for different visas.

Yes, but honestly I wouldn't do that with such a new relationship.

No, you never have to become a USC if you don't want to. But even if you do, you won't lose your British citizenship. You'd become a dual citizen.

Just to give you my own long distance love story...I met my husband in Turkey in 1997. After a brief meeting and then 4 years of no communication, I visited Turkey again in 2001 and looked him up..he was still there and still single. We spent about a week getting to know each other, going on a few dates and just hanging out. Decided to keep in touch and see where it goes. Spent 2 years on the phone getting to know each other. Decided we were falling in love and were a good match in our fundamental philosophies and goals, so I spent 3 weeks with him in Turkey in 2003, in his apartment, 24/7. Didn't see any red flags, so we got engaged. Started the K-1 fiance visa process, and he immigrated to the USA in 2004. He became a USC in 2009, we've beeen married 8 years, and are very happy. So...don't jump into anything...if it's meant to be, it will be...let the relationship run its course long distance.

Rene

Yes - and, respectfully, you don't want to act like one - which, I'll point out, is very easy to do if you're not careful! Don't be driven by your (overactive) hormones.

Ian

TBH hardly anybody is going to sponsor someone for any sort of visa if/when they find out that the person has a USC other half.

I also would recommend flying back and forth for a while to get some idea how real life would work out. We did that for about 2-3 years before we took the plunge.

Temp work...that's H2B....ski instructor, fruit picker, that kind of stuff.

Your job, unless it requires a degree isn't going to be eligible for a H1B...so does the company have a US presence? If so, look at a L1...but without a lot of experience it won't be likely.

Look at going to uni in the US as a option, expensive though or consider a third party country. You could consider workers holiday visa for Canada and he could look for something that is NAFTA eligible.