nikki dreaming

Hope everything goes well for you today, good luck

quoll

Bon Voyage!!!

What a journey you have already had in this thread - I hope your trip home is smooth and uneventful and you will be home to see your mum in no time at all!

Mummy in the foothills

She should be getting ready to leave about now. I hope it's going well and she's grinning from ear to ear.

Cheetah7

I cannot wait until we hear her update, seriously I cannot wait.

Fleaflyfloflum

Although I have a lot going on in my world at the moment, I cant help thinking about Beth and her plight every single day. And Ruby too for that matter.
In fact i've done way too much thinking lately!

Cant wait to hear from Beth.

tonrob

Beth

I don't visit this part of BE very often, but I've just read the entire thread and I have to say that your story and the courage you have shown has really moved me.

I've just glanced at the clock and can see that, if your flight was on time, that you've probably landed already and met your mum. The thought of how happy you must be right now makes me very happy too.

Best wishes to you for this exciting new chapter in your life!

Tony

JCSUPERMOTO

Beth
I too have just stumbulled across your post and i have had so many mixes feeling of hapiness when you first moved to a a tear in my eye to me fuming at the ears with the way you have been mistreated to excitment in your return to your mothers arms

I live by birmingham,but i travel up narth to see friends and family,please shout and i too will try and help!!

I hope you get the life you well deserve beth

Ps Get your corn dog from adsa deli from now on please

jase

JCSUPERMOTO

Anyone got any info ?
Hope all is working out for the lass
jase

asprilla

Beth's mum might not have internet access.... Hopefully we'll get an update in the coming weeks.

JCSUPERMOTO

Come on missus,how are you getting on?

Juswus

wow. I've only just read this...what an inspiration you are Beth.

This has to be the nicest thread I've ever read. Huge real-life karma going to all those who helped Beth.

Reading this has really done my heart good *sigh*

JCSUPERMOTO

It's missing a bloody "HAPPY" ending though!!!

welshviking

It's already Happy....we just haven't heard about it

Bethv7

Hello all

I write this post with the heaviest of hearts, and i'm sorry to inform you...there is no happy ending. Stuck between a rock and a hard place i have been extremely worried about sending a wrong message to anyone who may be in a similar situation. All i ask is to please remember that everyone's situation is different, i hope and pray that mine is an isolated case. As difficult as this is, i owe so much to all those who have supported me....it is for them i write this.

Friday 30th Jan finally arrived, i woke early that morning with such excitement i could barely contain myself. Whilst eating a little breakfast i was watching CNN news when all of a sudden it was interrupted with breaking news of a 4.5 earthquake that had hit Seattle earlier that morning (just before 5.30am) omg i thought, this surely was an omen...thank goodness i was leaving. We were used to small earthquakes in the north west but this was the biggest in nearly 7yrs of living here, all remained calm, no aftershocks and i continued to get ready for the cab that was taking me to the airport at 10am. My husband had no idea i was leaving and i knew this would be a huge shock to him when he finally realised i had left...for good! I had no regrets of my decision and thoughts of England and finally seeing my mum after all this time kept me strong. Taking one final look around my garden, i said goodbye to my little furry animal friends, and as much as i would miss them i knew i needed human contact more.

I was met at the airport with a wheelchair and without any delay i was through security and at my departure gate waiting to board the plane to Amsterdam. I was early so decided to buy mum a bottle of duty free perfume (small treat) NorthWest were absolutely wonderful with assistance, i cant thank them enough....when boarding they assisted me not just onto the plane...but right into my seat

At exactly 1.18pm (pacific time) the plane soared into the beautiful blue sky over Seattle. Admittedly i shed a tear as there to my left was Mount Rainier (largest active volcano in North America) and only on a clear day can you appreciate what a majestic and truly awesome sight this really is. I had never seen such beautiful scenery as i had in WA state, views i never ever took for granted. Before long Seattle suddenly looked very small surrounded by the beautiful cascade and olympic mountains and it quickly went out of view. I knew i would miss this more than anything, and with one last glance and i quickly settled in for the long flight ahead. Thoughts of mum and England and everyone at BE filled my mind, wishing you could all see me sat there so proud and beaming. With a sigh of relief i still couldnt believe how much i had achieved in just 10 days!

It wasnt long before i and the Indian lady sat next to me began chatting. She had just said goodbye to her daughters and grandchildren and had no idea when she would see them again. She really was a lovely lady and i naturally felt sad for her. By the end of our flight she had really cheered up and we both felt we had known each other for ever lol, we exchanged emails so we could keep in touch and at 7.30am and after a pretty scary flight (turbulence) we touched down in Amsterdam.

Another assistant was waiting on arrival to transfer me onto a buggy which very quickly took me to my next departure gate heading to Teesside UK. I hadnt slept a wink on the plane (too excited) but was now starting to feel very sleepy. My back in agony, i could barely feel my right leg...i'd worried about this and armed myself with lots of pain meds which were now wearing off. Not far now, and thoughts of seeing mum helped me cope with the pain. At 9.25am we left Amsterdam and 50 minutes later we touched down at Teeside. It was bitterly cold and i'd flown into the coldest weather in the UK in 18yrs apparently. There on the tarmac was 2 assistants to help me into yet another wheelchair and my luggage. They were really very sweet but kept telling me how 'American i sounded' which i kept denying...lol. After getting another lovely smile from the immigration officer there was now only 2 sliding doors between mum and i, determined to walk the final stretch i was helped out of the wheelchair and onto my feet...this was it I did it...only a few yards further and i was sobbing in her arms, it was so emotional even the 2 assistants wiped a tear away...bless them lol.

It felt surreal on the drive to her small terraced bungalow, i couldnt believe i was in England. I wasnt from this area and i suddenly felt lost for a while as we headed home. I was completely exhausted and once in the house i burst into tears again! It had been the most emotional roller coster time of my life. I had just left my husband and the country i'd lived in for the last 7yrs and along with a gruelling 20hr (start to finish) journey i was completely overwhelmed. It was to be expected...i had discussed this many times on the phone with mum, that it was going to take time to adjust....to everything!

Sitting with a cup of tea i had only been home for 90 minutes when mum announced she had made plans for us to go out? Puzzled at this i gently reminded her how far i had just travelled and she could see i could barely stand up? I knew she was excited to show me off to everyone she had talked to...but...i needed time. Time to rest, and time to absorb all what had happened in the last 10 days, i was more than a little stunned that she was disappointed i couldnt manage to go ANYWHERE? A few hours later and all i wanted to do was sleep, i could barely keep my eyes open and it wasnt long before i collapsed into bed. I didnt sleep much (jet lag) and after tossing and turning i got up at 5am the next morning...mum was up a few hrs later and whilst making a pot of tea she again announced i would be going out? This time to look at furniture that a neighbour no longer needed and then out for bingo and lunch??? Again i reminded her of our conversations on the phone and tried to explain i just needed to rest. This didnt go down too well and i felt i was constantly upsetting her plans along with disappointing her. I was truly grateful that she had offered me her home....but this was not part of the plan?? She had been reading my hospital records explaining everything regards the failed fusion (hoping this would help her understand) along with my lack of mobility. It was apparent she hadnt realised i was more disabled than she thought...and instead of feeling comfort i again felt i had disappointed her. I had been home less than 24hrs and felt i had made a very big mistake. Talking things over made no difference, i didnt recognize my own mum? Its extremely difficult and very painful to write this....all i can say is the situation had become so bad i left her home the following day.

I arrived in North Yorkshire the following afternoon by cab, terrified and bewildered i was met by a lady who i had spoken with previously on the phone weeks whilst still in the states. I had stayed up all night (due to the time difference) discussing if and how they could help me...along with social services. They already had most of my details from the phone calls so it was more a case of just filling in the necessary paperwork and giving her all the evidence needed. I had police, doctors and hospital records ready for her to view and 2hrs later they informed me i would be going to a womans refuge only it was in the AREA i had just left??? There was nothing available in my home town and i had no choice but to go wherever they sent me. I kept asking if the refuge had disabled facilities and she could clearly see i needed assistance. By 6.30pm i arrived at the refuge...dazed exhausted and frightened i was met at the door by a very nice lady called Sue. After helping me with cases etc she took me into the kitchen to make yet another cup of tea. I hadnt eaten one solitary thing since i was on the plane and still didnt feel hungry. I was kindly offered food but explained i was just too upset to eat. She understood and with a very worried look on her face led me into her office and said 'Elizabeth, housing didnt explain that you were disabled and the only floor level units available are already in use'? Housing had informed me i would be sharing with another lady, but failed to mention she also had 5 children and i would have to sleep on the floor?? In disbelief there was no need to explain to Sue that this would be impossible, she could see for herself i needed physical help and got on the phone to the housing dept that had just sent me there. It was an emergency tel number (outside of hrs) in York who were as shocked as Sue and i that i was placed there. Besides i was at no risk of my husband showing up, he's not allowed into the UK due to his previous domestic violence conviction. Sue was very apologetic (it certainly wasnt her fault) but it was evident that i could not stay there. Hours and many phone calls later housing called Sue back, who then passed the phone to me where i was told they were going to send yet another cab to take me back to North Yorkshire....however the only place they had available was the local pub...it was either that or the floor at the refuge? I again asked if it was ground level and was told there was 8 steps to my room and the landlord was willing to help me. I didnt really have much choice so agreed to go back. At 9.30pm i arrived, the landlord met me outside and a regular of the pub took the suitcases. I was freezing cold, exhausted and by this time more bewildered than i had ever been in my life, at least it looked familiar i thought! Once inside i could see the 8 steps the housing officer had mentioned...what she didnt tell me was there another 2 flights of them? With all my strength and will i climbed them only to find out the bathroom was another 2 flights up? This was a complete nightmare and all the calls i had made previous were all to no avail. Lost confused and now very very frightened i was shown my room. No basin no bathroom, it was beyond dirty, sheets so bad i refused to sleep in them and for 2nights i slept with all my clothes on and top of the bed. I had to share a toilet with 4 other men (no women) this was all that available!

I wanted to run out of there as quick as i could, but didnt even have a phone? I asked the landlord if i could use his for just a couple of minutes which he reluctantly agreed to. I called social services and informed them of everything that had happened since i got back to the UK, told them where i was and begged them for help. They told me they had nothing to do with the housing dept and i could only be referred once i had an address? Suddenly i didnt feel strong anymore, this was more than i could take and i wanted to be away from that place as of that second. The next day another housing manager came out (a gentleman) and i literally begged him to take me back to the offices with him, explaining i could not stay in this place for another second (under any circumstances) but especially (no offence) having 4 complete strangers all of whom were men around me. I did not feel safe, this was a very rough place and as much as i thought i was strong....i was not strong enough for this?

I had arranged for the money from some of my furniture to be sent by western union, i HAD to get to the agents location and GET OUT of that place. I dont expect anyone who hasnt gone through a similar experience to understand....but all i can tell you is, i have never ever ever felt so lost or frightened in my entire life!!

Nervously asking one last time if i could borrow the landlords phone, i made 2 very quick calls, 1 to western union and 1 for a cab!!!! This time it was a young girl who came to pick me up (luckily a big girl) who had no problems helping carrying my luggage. Once inside the cab she immediately asked me 'what was I doing in a dive like that'? Too embarrassed to explain i told her it was a very very long story that she would be better off not knowing!! We stopped at western union, quickly bought a new cell phone (took 20mins) and headed for the nearest and safest hotel. Again i had lots of help with cases and this time the hotel had a lift, once inside the room i literally shook for 3hrs!!! This was an experience i was NEVER going to forget...not ever! I called the housing dept from my new cell phone and spoke to the same gentleman who had visited me at the pub, i told him i had left and would NOT be going back and the obvious reasons why?

By now i'm sure you can understand why i had concerns of posting my experience, and how i have been stuck in a very serious dilemma! I read all the posts from everyone wanting an update, and as much i have just wanted to crawl away and die....i can't and still won't give up, and i knew how anxious you were to receive an update. I had my laptop but could not get internet access anywhere. I had no idea what i was going to do or where i was going to go until the next day when i called my neighbours back home in Seattle. I had to speak to someone and could not find Lynnes number from BE, although it was on my laptop i could not get access to it. My neighbours were horrified and extremely worried, that cell phone literally saved me! I didnt know where i belonged anymore, here or there, England or the USA. I had already told the mortgage company back home that i was letting the house go into foreclosure, although they did tell me that would all take some time to process. I'd sold most of my furniture and it was only when going through my suitcases i noticed the perfume i had bought for mum was missing, along with other items....i'd been robbed!!! That was the final straw and after speaking to my neighbours i boarded a plane back to Seattle and returned home only a few days ago.

The key to my home was still inside the garage where i had left it i walked into my home that is practically empty. I really don't care...for the first time since leaving i felt i could breathe! My husband knows of my return (he still hasnt got over the shock of my leaving) I remain firm that we will not be reconciling....however much he says he's changed. For now i am taking one hour at a time, with no plans to leave until i have spoken with the mortgage company. I am broken, in shock, and have lost so much weight that i dont recognise myself....but given time i remain hopeful that i can recover and try again. I just need some time before i can even begin to think about 'what's next'. I feel like i have let you all down and can only apologise i wasnt strong enough to stay...i gave it my best but with a physical disability it was simply too much.

It has taken me nearly 4hrs to write this post, ive had to take quite a few breaks to compose myself before continuing and has been the most painful thing i have ever had to write! Thank you to everyone who has posted messages of support and sincere good wishes, i'm grateful beyond words...thank you.

Beth

JCSUPERMOTO

Beth,that isnt the ending i wanted to hear!!!

Can i just say that you are a very intelligent lady,and it will work out i tell you.

You have had a very very bad experience,infact it couldnt off been worse,but you are alive and you have a life to lead.

You have been very brave in doing what you felt was right,and i applaud you

But please...........Never give up

jase