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Second thoughts.

Second thoughts.

Old Apr 2nd 2017, 10:16 pm
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Unhappy Second thoughts.

We should be flying out to the USA at the beginning of May however I'm having a major wobble today has consisted of me being tearful and generally sad at leaving family and friends. I'm thinking it's as I'm totally overwhelmed with the planning and upcoming move. Are these normal feelings? Presently I feel like jacking it in and staying in the UK however this will cause upset to my husband and daughters big time. Sorry for being so negative but I can't help help how I'm feeling at the moment.
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Old Apr 2nd 2017, 10:32 pm
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

Originally Posted by sarasota chic View Post
We should be flying out to the USA at the beginning of May however I'm having a major wobble today has consisted of me being tearful and generally sad at leaving family and friends. I'm thinking it's as I'm totally overwhelmed with the planning and upcoming move. Are these normal feelings? Presently I feel like jacking it in and staying in the UK however this will cause upset to my husband and daughters big time. Sorry for being so negative but I can't help help how I'm feeling at the moment.
Totally normal. Take a few deep breaths, don't think long term yet just think of it as a new adventure and life experience.

Also nowadays with Skype and easy phone access you can be in constant touch with family and friends and what's the betting many will be visiting as soon as you're settled as well

It's coming up to 28 years since we moved to Texas and I still remember the feelings I had when we left. To make it easier we set out with a 2 year plan, if it didn't work then we would know after 2 years and then move back. Well we are still here after numerous set backs. Just take it a day at a time.

Good luck and . Enjoy the ride
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Old Apr 2nd 2017, 10:36 pm
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

Originally Posted by Sugarmooma View Post
Totally normal. Take a few deep breaths, don't think long term yet just think of it as a new adventure and life experience.

Also nowadays with Skype and easy phone access you can be in constant touch with family and friends and what's the betting many will be visiting as soon as you're settled as well

It's coming up to 28 years since we moved to Texas and I still remember the feelings I had when we left. To make it easier we set out with a 2 year plan, if it didn't work then we would know after 2 years and then move back. Well we are still here after numerous set backs. Just take it a day at a time.

Good luck and . Enjoy the ride
Thank you Sugarmooma I think having a 2 year plan is good at least it gives you a way out if everything goes pearshaped.
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Old Apr 2nd 2017, 10:38 pm
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

The feelings you're having are normal.

To help with UK folk (particularly elderly) keep in touch with me I have a phone number set up in the area code I used to live in that seamlessly forwards to my US cell phone at no additional cost to the UK caller. I pay about $1-2 a month for this.
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Old Apr 2nd 2017, 11:01 pm
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

Perfectly normal as others have said - I've been in the US for just over 6 months now and I miss home (Scotland) and my family/friends a lot, but I look at it as a 3-year trial. I'm not sure if you are completely selling up for your relocation, but if you can keep your home in the the UK until you are 100% sure that you want to stay, then at least you know that at the very least, all you need is the cost of the flights home.
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Old Apr 2nd 2017, 11:14 pm
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

Originally Posted by mproudfoot View Post
Perfectly normal as others have said - I've been in the US for just over 6 months now and I miss home (Scotland) and my family/friends a lot, but I look at it as a 3-year trial. I'm not sure if you are completely selling up for your relocation, but if you can keep your home in the the UK until you are 100% sure that you want to stay, then at least you know that at the very least, all you need is the cost of the flights home.
We are renting in the U.K but if the worst came to the worst we could stay with relatives in the U.K until we found a place of our own and as you say you only need the airfare home.
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Old Apr 2nd 2017, 11:28 pm
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

We moved to Florida in July. Mostly I've just kept moving forward, but there have definitely been times I've missed friends and family desperately. One of the things that has helped me is just being honest with myself that I will fall apart from time to time. And that's totally normal and acceptable. I'm not pretending it's all hunky dory ever day, But I love being here. Life's an adventure and I've always regretted the things I didn't do, not the things I did...
Good luck!
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Old Apr 3rd 2017, 1:00 am
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

I almost put a stop to our move about a month before we left the U.K.
We moved in august 2011. The last day of school was horrible! If it hadn't been for the fact that we had given up the school places and wouldn't have been able to go to same schools in September as they were oversubscribed I'm not sure what might have happened.
Fast forward nearly 6 years and I'm glad I didn't make everybody stay in England.
But it doesn't change the fact that nostalgia hits you at the most unexpected times. I was watching Broadchurch and heard a wood pigeon. Very sad moment indeed! But it passed!
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Old Apr 3rd 2017, 2:00 am
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

For all the people who say its completely normal, we are the exception then, I don't think me or Mrs Q or the kids had any wobbles, then or now. We left a tough life in the UK to a much nicer one in the USA.
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Old Apr 3rd 2017, 2:20 am
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

Originally Posted by steveq View Post
For all the people who say its completely normal, we are the exception then, I don't think me or Mrs Q or the kids had any wobbles, then or now. We left a tough life in the UK to a much nicer one in the USA.
It's fear of the unknown mostly and moving out of your comfort zone.

I'm sure there are others like you on here .
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Old Apr 3rd 2017, 2:31 am
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

Originally Posted by steveq View Post
For all the people who say its completely normal, we are the exception then, I don't think me or Mrs Q or the kids had any wobbles, then or now. We left a tough life in the UK to a much nicer one in the USA.
I think it's hard to generalize as after all it's opinions and emotions. Everyone handles it differently. I think the key to it all is keeping rational and focused.

Personally I sometimes miss a few comforts I had in England... mainly around socializing with lifelong friends, but for 99% of things I'm having a better quality of life here.

Seems like you and the family have made a good go of it.
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Old Apr 3rd 2017, 3:04 am
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

It worked completely opposite for me, I had so much going on it didn't really hit me until the airport and on the flight complete breakdown. It was always going to be permanent move for us so we sold up with no safety net.

I do miss family and the sadness hits me at weird times. Its just made me more determined to get settled and buy a house so they can come over and visit.

Try to enjoy the time left in UK as much as possible that's my only regret.
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Old Apr 3rd 2017, 11:03 am
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

Big hugs sarasota chic, these feelings are normal. I think the 'reality' hits people at different times in different ways. You likely will feel homesick and nervous/scared, but like others have advised, take life in little chunks at a time to help manage those feelings. Best of luck. Just remember how hard you fought for everything.
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Old Apr 3rd 2017, 4:28 pm
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

Thank you all for your encouragement I feel a little better today I think one big issue is we are moving to Louisania with my job and we desperately wanted Florida, however my contract is only for 20 months and once I've completed we are free to move to Florida. However I will give myself a 2 year plan and take it from there.
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Old Apr 3rd 2017, 4:30 pm
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Default Re: Second thoughts.

Originally Posted by sarasota chic View Post
Thank you all for your encouragement I feel a little better today I think one big issue is we are moving to Louisania
The food in Louisiana is much better, and it has New Orleans, which I rather like.
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