Horrible maternity leave
Jan 23rd 2007, 2:16 pm
#76
Thinking about it
Joined: Oct 2005
Location: Mid-West
Posts: 9,435
Re: Horrible maternity leave
Where have I said that ???
I suppose if you can't think of a sensible counter argument you'll just start making stuff up - you'll be calling me racist next....
If you are going to have kids you really should be prepared to pay for them yourself, and bring them up yourself as best you can. Having kids and expecting the government to pay or assist is hardly very sensible, is it ??
Jan 23rd 2007, 2:22 pm
#77
Thinking about it
Joined: Oct 2005
Location: Mid-West
Posts: 9,435
Re: Horrible maternity leave
It doesn't make it right, but companies are set up to make money, not to 'be right'.
Jan 23rd 2007, 2:26 pm
#78
Member
Thread Starter
Joined: Jul 2005
Location: Garden State
Posts: 280
Re: Horrible maternity leave
I did not see one reference on the dol.gov website refering to pregnancy as a temporary disability in relation to FMLA. Unless your doctor has referred to your pregnancy as a disability and has done so in writing, it's probably not in your best interests to refer to your pregnancy as a "disability", especially to your manager.
If your doctor thinks you should not work for the four weeks proir to the birth and you wish to stop working in that time, you should ask your doctor to provide a letter explaining his concerns and the reasons why.
NC Penguin
If your doctor thinks you should not work for the four weeks proir to the birth and you wish to stop working in that time, you should ask your doctor to provide a letter explaining his concerns and the reasons why.
NC Penguin
See link:
http://www.state.nj.us/labor/tdi/preg.html
There are 2 state forms with medical reasons which are being filled out by my doctor. I will have to give these to HR.
I am not just doing whatever I please, these are the procedures for maternity leave in New Jersey.
The whole point of my OP is that I am following due process but my boss wants to side-step this and get me to take less time off, which I think is out of order especially as has been unprofessional by talking about how times have changed and I how need to adapt to the US. As far as I can see, I have adapted to the NJ family leave procedures. If times have changed so much why do they have these family leave laws?
I just found out a woman who is due the same time as me in another department is leaving work 4 weeks before her due date with no hassles from her boss whatsoever.
Jan 23rd 2007, 2:42 pm
#79
Homebody
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: HOME
Posts: 23,181
Re: Horrible maternity leave
Evidently you do not, because otherwise you would not begrudge parents the help they are getting from governments - optimal in Scandinavia, just about adequate in the UK, but virtually non-existent in the US.
A woman wants to take 4 paltry months of to care for her baby - most of them UNPAID!!! - and she is accused of jeopardising the business? Assuming she has two kids, that will be 8 lousy months out of a working life of 40+ years!
Jan 23rd 2007, 2:46 pm
#80
Unmitigated Gall
Joined: Dec 2006
Location: it's still too dark to tell
Posts: 16,162
Re: Horrible maternity leave
If my boss could get along without me for 22 weeks, I'd be ashamed to go back! Why on earth would you have someone on the payroll who the company can afford to do without for nearly six months out of the year?
I don't think companies should mistreat employees, but I also think that employees shouldn't bite the hand that feeds. You are entitled by law to that much time off and your boss shouldn't act like an ass if you decide to take the full amount. (you could have given more warning though
) ) Try to understand his position, your early weeks and months with your newborn are extremely important, but he probably thinks his job is pretty important and if you are any kind of employee, your being gone that long will have a negative impact on his performance.
I don't think companies should mistreat employees, but I also think that employees shouldn't bite the hand that feeds. You are entitled by law to that much time off and your boss shouldn't act like an ass if you decide to take the full amount. (you could have given more warning though
) ) Try to understand his position, your early weeks and months with your newborn are extremely important, but he probably thinks his job is pretty important and if you are any kind of employee, your being gone that long will have a negative impact on his performance.
Jan 23rd 2007, 2:51 pm
#81
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Joined: Mar 2004
Location: Chicago, Il
Posts: 1,320
Re: Horrible maternity leave
In her previous marriage my wife worked for Humana in a mid level position... she had to work up to AND including the day she was induced and was back AT work 2 weeks later.... I find that sickening.
She won't be working AT ALL when we have more kids (this year hopefully).
In my opinion children need as MUCH attention as you can give them as EARLY as you can provide it.
US law provides for X amount of time... I will be taking ALL of it.
to the OP - stand your ground. Maximise your time off with your baby, you WILL regret it otherwise as its likely to be the longest amount of time you get with you baby until you retire.
She won't be working AT ALL when we have more kids (this year hopefully).
In my opinion children need as MUCH attention as you can give them as EARLY as you can provide it.
US law provides for X amount of time... I will be taking ALL of it.
to the OP - stand your ground. Maximise your time off with your baby, you WILL regret it otherwise as its likely to be the longest amount of time you get with you baby until you retire.
Jan 23rd 2007, 3:10 pm
#82
Thinking about it
Joined: Oct 2005
Location: Mid-West
Posts: 9,435
Re: Horrible maternity leave
Do you have even an inkling of what bringing up children involves?
Evidently you do not, because otherwise you would not begrudge parents the help they are getting from governments - optimal in Scandinavia, just about adequate in the UK, but virtually non-existent in the US.
A woman wants to take 4 paltry months of to care for her baby - most of them UNPAID!!! - and she is accused of jeopardising the business? Assuming she has two kids, that will be 8 lousy months out of a working life of 40+ years!
Evidently you do not, because otherwise you would not begrudge parents the help they are getting from governments - optimal in Scandinavia, just about adequate in the UK, but virtually non-existent in the US.
A woman wants to take 4 paltry months of to care for her baby - most of them UNPAID!!! - and she is accused of jeopardising the business? Assuming she has two kids, that will be 8 lousy months out of a working life of 40+ years!
I have made no comment about the OP specifically.
Some people have stated that it is probably naive to expect any help from your employer or anyone over this for that matter.
No-one is disputing that a mother (or father) should be able to spend as long with their newborn as they want, but why would anyone expect their employer to pay for any of that time, be it directly or indirectly ????
What if I decide that I don't want to start a family, but instead want to buy a ferrari - should I expect government assistance - of course I shouldn't - so why then should I expect it if I chose to start a family without being able to shoulder the burden with my spouse.
Just look back on what you've said - its ridiculous, utterly ridiculous - you are advocating a dependency culture and rubbishing the need for people to attain some level of self-sufficiency.
Like you said earlier - you reap what you sow........
Jan 23rd 2007, 3:12 pm
#83
Maño-Americano
Joined: Apr 2003
Location: In the heart of the Ozarks
Posts: 10,216
Re: Horrible maternity leave
Anything with a Union... lol 
You could try these for starters: http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortu...007/full_list/
I think there's more than people realise; e.g. Florida Power and Light paid for my neighbour's education, now he makes $150,000 a year repairing electrical distribution equipment.
Note to self: Get job at FPL.
EDIT: <- man this smiley sucks, looks like Sylvester Stallone on the toilet.
You could try these for starters: http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortu...007/full_list/
I think there's more than people realise; e.g. Florida Power and Light paid for my neighbour's education, now he makes $150,000 a year repairing electrical distribution equipment.
Note to self: Get job at FPL.
EDIT:
<- man this smiley sucks, looks like Sylvester Stallone on the toilet.Yeah, working for a power company that is guarenteed a profit no matter what they spend... on the backs of their poor customers who HAVE to use their monopolistic service is wonderful. I love paying $200/month for electric thatactually only costs them pennies.
As for the 'great companies with Unions, one only has to look at the Big 3 auto makers and their suppliers to see how well they are doing (GM/Ford on the verge of bancruptcy, Delphi, Visteon, Dana, Tower Automotive etc already in the crapper)... all union I believe, with utterly unbelivable wages and work rules- that in a large part have driven the formerly union jobs off shore.
Jan 23rd 2007, 3:12 pm
#84
Maño-Americano
Joined: Apr 2003
Location: In the heart of the Ozarks
Posts: 10,216
Re: Horrible maternity leave
Anything with a Union... lol
You could try these for starters: http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortu...007/full_list/
I think there's more than people realise; e.g. Florida Power and Light paid for my neighbour's education, now he makes $150,000 a year repairing electrical distribution equipment.
Note to self: Get job at FPL.
EDIT: <- man this smiley sucks, looks like Sylvester Stallone on the toilet.
You could try these for starters: http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortu...007/full_list/
I think there's more than people realise; e.g. Florida Power and Light paid for my neighbour's education, now he makes $150,000 a year repairing electrical distribution equipment.
Note to self: Get job at FPL.
EDIT:
<- man this smiley sucks, looks like Sylvester Stallone on the toilet.Yeah, working for a power company that is guarenteed a profit no matter what they spend... on the backs of their poor customers who HAVE to use their monopolistic service is wonderful. I love paying $200/month for electric thatactually only costs them pennies.
As for the 'great companies with Unions', one only has to look at the Big 3 auto makers and their suppliers to see how well they are doing (GM/Ford on the verge of bancruptcy, Delphi, Visteon, Dana, Tower Automotive etc already in the crapper)... all union I believe, with utterly unbelivable wages and work rules- that in a large part have driven the formerly union jobs off shore.
Jan 23rd 2007, 3:13 pm
#85
Thinking about it
Joined: Oct 2005
Location: Mid-West
Posts: 9,435
Re: Horrible maternity leave
In her previous marriage my wife worked for Humana in a mid level position... she had to work up to AND including the day she was induced and was back AT work 2 weeks later.... I find that sickening.
She won't be working AT ALL when we have more kids (this year hopefully).
In my opinion children need as MUCH attention as you can give them as EARLY as you can provide it.
US law provides for X amount of time... I will be taking ALL of it.
to the OP - stand your ground. Maximise your time off with your baby, you WILL regret it otherwise as its likely to be the longest amount of time you get with you baby until you retire.
She won't be working AT ALL when we have more kids (this year hopefully).
In my opinion children need as MUCH attention as you can give them as EARLY as you can provide it.
US law provides for X amount of time... I will be taking ALL of it.
to the OP - stand your ground. Maximise your time off with your baby, you WILL regret it otherwise as its likely to be the longest amount of time you get with you baby until you retire.
You are to be applauded for your mature and responsible approach to this.
Now the sarcastic bit....
I wonder why you would bother though when you could just sit there and have your employer, colleagues and government cover your ass for you
Jan 23rd 2007, 3:28 pm
#86
Member
Thread Starter
Joined: Jul 2005
Location: Garden State
Posts: 280
Re: Horrible maternity leave
By the way, I don't care about being paid, just want the time off. My boss is actually willing to pay me full for 2 months as an incentive to come back early but I value the time off more so would rather have 20 weeks off unpaid. I don't want to take his pay and then take the extra time off anyway, he might get even more pissed off then. So I am being honest with him and let him keep his money. I find Americans generally avoid taking unpaid leave, that's probably why most of the women in my office only took the minimum time off with state maternity benefits and then came back after 6 weeks.
Jan 23rd 2007, 3:49 pm
#87
Joined: Jun 2006
Location: Aspen, CO
Posts: 9,845
Re: Horrible maternity leave
In the UK paid maternity leave is going up from 6 months to 9 months from April, and to 1 year by the end of the current parliament.. Try explaining this to people here, they look at you like you are crazy..
Jan 23rd 2007, 3:54 pm
#88
Homebody
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: HOME
Posts: 23,181
Re: Horrible maternity leave
I was waiting for you to make some kind of hysterical post - must have been a struggle for you to hold back for so long.
I have made no comment about the OP specifically.
Some people have stated that it is probably naive to expect any help from your employer or anyone over this for that matter.
No-one is disputing that a mother (or father) should be able to spend as long with their newborn as they want, but why would anyone expect their employer to pay for any of that time, be it directly or indirectly ????
What if I decide that I don't want to start a family, but instead want to buy a ferrari - should I expect government assistance - of course I shouldn't - so why then should I expect it if I chose to start a family without being able to shoulder the burden with my spouse.
Just look back on what you've said - its ridiculous, utterly ridiculous - you are advocating a dependency culture and rubbishing the need for people to attain some level of self-sufficiency.
Like you said earlier - you reap what you sow........
I have made no comment about the OP specifically.
Some people have stated that it is probably naive to expect any help from your employer or anyone over this for that matter.
No-one is disputing that a mother (or father) should be able to spend as long with their newborn as they want, but why would anyone expect their employer to pay for any of that time, be it directly or indirectly ????
What if I decide that I don't want to start a family, but instead want to buy a ferrari - should I expect government assistance - of course I shouldn't - so why then should I expect it if I chose to start a family without being able to shoulder the burden with my spouse.
Just look back on what you've said - its ridiculous, utterly ridiculous - you are advocating a dependency culture and rubbishing the need for people to attain some level of self-sufficiency.
Like you said earlier - you reap what you sow........
Wow. I mean........ words fail me. But clearly you are an idiot.
Jan 23rd 2007, 3:55 pm
#89
Unmitigated Gall
Joined: Dec 2006
Location: it's still too dark to tell
Posts: 16,162
Jan 23rd 2007, 3:57 pm
#90
Account Closed
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 15,019
Re: Horrible maternity leave
