md95065

Depends entirely on the person and their circumstances - anything from "before they even got there" to "never" ...

ian-mstm

While absolutely true if you have a 10-year GC, if you only have a 2-year GC via marriage to a USC... well, then it's only partially true.

Ian

dunroving

Same as others, I'm sorry you have ended up in this siituation and I'm sure it's hard to think clearly.

the one piece of advice I would give is that no matter what you "think you think" (e.g., in a month you may think there is no way you'd go back to the US), be very very careful before deciding to give up on your PR status/chance to get US citizenship.

TracyTN

Once you 'clear your head' and have a trip back home, I would at least stick it out here long enough to get US citizenship. That gives you another option to stay - or leave and come back no matter how long you're away - that you wouldn't have without the natz certificate.

Xebedee

How long's a piece of string??





(4'6")

Assanah

That happened to me in a way too! I understand how you are feeling! I went back home to Germany and got terribly homesick for the US! It is very hard to keep your greencard when living abroad. If you can get American citizenship first, then leave if you must. I didn't do that and I regret that very much now. However, i have the permanent residence for New Zealand, I will move there in a few months. Never really settled in Germany...

Bomjeito

You have lots and lots of options here! Firstly, you don't have to move 'home' (from where you came from.) Yes, by all means, spend the holidays with your family and old friends.

Secondly, who says you MUST choose between US and UK? Lots of other great places to live for a new start. When one of my relationships ended, I started all over in a new place altogether. New job, new house, new everything, and made it all my own.

Lastly, you have been in USA for 6 years and have no friends? You may need a bit more than a location change to remedy that. (Meaning, you may want to look more into 'you' than the location.)

I'm sorry it ended in a way that you did not want or expect. That often means the future looks pretty bright, as you are forced to make changes that the 'dumper' does not have to. Dumpees are a stronger breed of folk - they/we MUST move on and living well is indeed the best reaction.

Don't make any impulsive or drastic decisions. Take a leave of absence from your company and go visit your family.

As with all things, strong upsets will pass, and you'll be more clearer thinking in a few months time. All things take time... you WILL be fine - in the end.

craigob1

Hi I normally hide and read but this post prompted me to sign up, I came here 9 years ago from Sunny Newcastle upon Tyne and settled in Philadelphia with my American wife. We split 6 months ago I wont go into details but it wasn't pretty.

I felt exactly the same emotions about going home and trying to reset, I thought long and hard about it and decided to take a 3 week vacation to see if it really what I wanted. The vacation was an eyeopener, I had a great time with friends and family for the first week then I realized that Newcastle wasn't home any more, I spent the rest of the time visiting friends, having fun and getting over the split, I even took a cheap flight Amsterdam with friends for a boys jolly weekend!!.

On reflection, I left the UK for a reason, and that reason was to start over, I did it In Philadelphia, sure things have changed but really.. go back for a vacation. I'm sure its not as "home" as you remember.

and as for being a PR.. I'm one too but will be taking the citizens test in March 2011. I have another house, a great job.. I really don't feel like the Geordie I used to do.

Good luck with what ever path you take just make sure you weigh the pros and cons

.

scrubbedexpat099

You have been here too long, it is a Holiday not a Vacation!

But you put it better than I did.

And welcome.

Xebedee

Sorry, but that just isn't necessarily true.

Wheras you can too easily project the wrong image or attitude (which will turn people off) by dwelling on whatever negatives, I can say in all honesty, it has been very, very difficult to create lasting and genuine relationships with American men. Many aquaintances and colleagues here, but sadly no "simply ordinary friendships" like I recently discovered I still have back home

Well, thats how long my own piece of string is, anyway.

Sally Redux

Have you moved back?

dunroving

Actually, these days it seems to be called "annual leave" ... bloody English language is getting infiltrated by bureaucrat-speak. :curse:

Sally Redux

Hasn't it always been called annual leave?

RickWG

Split up for a week & heading back to blighty right away? Seems a bit extreme. I've been here 20 years, divorced the missus almost 7 years ago, haven't been back to the UK once in all the time I've been here. Heck, I don't even like going to Santa Monica (expat LA in-joke, it's like the last outpost of The Empire down there).

I certainly wouldn't be making any decisions about where I'd live barely a week after splitting up... & given the weather back there right now will make it even more depressing.

Derrygal

Some of us on this side of the Pond have stronger ties than others to our families back in the UK. I am sure that most people on Ex Pats have gone back to the UK more than once in the last 20 years. Just because you don't feel the need to go back home, don't judge other people's different opinions and/or decisions.