Cities in America that make you feel at home?
Jan 27th 2013, 8:26 pm
#31
Forum Regular
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 49
Re: Cities in America that make you feel at home?
Well, this probably isn't very helpful, but the place where I want to live is the place where I do live - Santa Cruz, CA - a small (60,000 people) "city" on the coast about 80 miles south of San Francisco.
I suppose I was one of the very lucky people who had never really considered moving to the US but who ended up here anyway. As a result of some contacts that I made while working in the UK I was offered a job in California - I went out to visit and immediately felt very much "at home" (much more so than I had ever felt in the UK) so I accepted the offer and moved here a few months later (H1-B visas didn't take very long to get back in those days). That was 26 years ago and I have been here ever since.
If I *hadn't* had that instant reaction of feeling "at home" I would probably not have made the move.
I suppose I was one of the very lucky people who had never really considered moving to the US but who ended up here anyway. As a result of some contacts that I made while working in the UK I was offered a job in California - I went out to visit and immediately felt very much "at home" (much more so than I had ever felt in the UK) so I accepted the offer and moved here a few months later (H1-B visas didn't take very long to get back in those days). That was 26 years ago and I have been here ever since.
If I *hadn't* had that instant reaction of feeling "at home" I would probably not have made the move.
As stated in another post, I too feel somehow feel more at home when in various parts of the US.
Can you tell me a little about your 26 years? Is my wish for a warm community merely a dream or does it exist? Have you integrated well and have a good social circle?
Jan 27th 2013, 11:47 pm
#32
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Dec 2009
Location: Gaadnah MA
Posts: 597
Re: Cities in America that make you feel at home?
I've lived in this house for 15 years....the last time I spoke to one of my neighbours was about 5 years ago. She was collecting her mail...I was just about to enter our driveway...so I walked across and introduced myself. Said if she wanted anything just to give me a knock or call. Haven't spoken to her since.
Last October after Hurricane Sandy...another neighbor's drive was blocked by 3 trees that had fallen during the night. The next morning my husband went across and gave them one of our cars to drive until they could get their cars out I'd the driveway. The neighbor later returned the car and said it was an act of kindness they would never forget. Haven't spoken to them since.
We all acknowledge each other if our cars pass...but apart from that zilch. I don't know whether it's because most people are working...they have kids...family..church...but people around here don't seem to have the time for others outside their own family.
I can't for the life if me figure out why people think moving to the the US is going to solve all their problems.
Last October after Hurricane Sandy...another neighbor's drive was blocked by 3 trees that had fallen during the night. The next morning my husband went across and gave them one of our cars to drive until they could get their cars out I'd the driveway. The neighbor later returned the car and said it was an act of kindness they would never forget. Haven't spoken to them since.
We all acknowledge each other if our cars pass...but apart from that zilch. I don't know whether it's because most people are working...they have kids...family..church...but people around here don't seem to have the time for others outside their own family.
I can't for the life if me figure out why people think moving to the the US is going to solve all their problems.
Probably wouldn't be the same if I moved just a couple of blocks in the other direction - then I would probably be complaining about the neighbor's noise and worried about them stabbing one another.
My MIL on the other side of town lives in a more typical American suburb. She has the best neighbors - pretty much every time she has a crisis her immediate neighbor comes round and deals with it whether it be fixing her fridge or her garage door. There is a couple down the street that are always buying her presents - they even bought me a six pack of beer the other day and I don't even live there!!
Frankly living here makes me feel like a bad person because I do bugger all for my neighbors.
Jan 28th 2013, 2:04 am
#34
Septicity
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 23,762
Re: Cities in America that make you feel at home?
You don't get better than where I now live.
Jan 28th 2013, 2:11 am
#35
Joined: Aug 2003
Location: East Seaxe
Posts: 73,168
Re: Cities in America that make you feel at home?
Jan 28th 2013, 2:13 am
#36
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Feb 2009
Location: North Charleston,SC. born in Stockport,UK.
Posts: 10,109
Re: Cities in America that make you feel at home?
After 26 yrs married to my US hubby and having lived in 5 US States so far. 10 yrs over two seperate tours in England. Both hubby and I would not hesitate in saying that England is where we felt more 'at home'!
We lived in the Oxfordshire, Buckinghamshire areas and loved it there (I grew up nr Manchester) All the friends we have here in the US are people we met through the Military, not one neighbor. We still keep in touch with at least 6 families in England, (12 yrs since we lived there) they were either neighbors or same school parents.
One of the biggest differences here from England is, you will not walk your kids to school and chat to other Mums at the school gate (not in many places anyway) Most kids get on buses to/from school, or are dropped off (from the car) at the school, in my experience, most neighbors get into their cars inside the garage to go to work/shopping etc and drive back into the garage when they return, so you are lucky to even get to say hi or wave to them.
Believe me, the grass is not always greener across (this) side of the pond!
We lived in the Oxfordshire, Buckinghamshire areas and loved it there (I grew up nr Manchester) All the friends we have here in the US are people we met through the Military, not one neighbor. We still keep in touch with at least 6 families in England, (12 yrs since we lived there) they were either neighbors or same school parents.
One of the biggest differences here from England is, you will not walk your kids to school and chat to other Mums at the school gate (not in many places anyway) Most kids get on buses to/from school, or are dropped off (from the car) at the school, in my experience, most neighbors get into their cars inside the garage to go to work/shopping etc and drive back into the garage when they return, so you are lucky to even get to say hi or wave to them.
Believe me, the grass is not always greener across (this) side of the pond!
Jan 28th 2013, 2:15 am
#37
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 41,518
Re: Cities in America that make you feel at home?
Jan 28th 2013, 2:18 am
#39
Joined: Aug 2003
Location: East Seaxe
Posts: 73,168
Re: Cities in America that make you feel at home?
Yep!
Look at all the people two miles from our door.
http://www.chrisfrailey.com/wp-conte...log-1-of-1.jpg
Look at all the people two miles from our door.
http://www.chrisfrailey.com/wp-conte...log-1-of-1.jpg
Looks lovely actually, very striking.
Jan 28th 2013, 2:24 am
#41
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 41,518
Re: Cities in America that make you feel at home?
One of the biggest differences here from England is, you will not walk your kids to school and chat to other Mums at the school gate (not in many places anyway) Most kids get on buses to/from school, or are dropped off (from the car) at the school, in my experience, most neighbors get into their cars inside the garage to go to work/shopping etc and drive back into the garage when they return, so you are lucky to even get to say hi or wave to them.
Jan 28th 2013, 2:25 am
#42
Joined: Aug 2003
Location: East Seaxe
Posts: 73,168
Re: Cities in America that make you feel at home?
If you want trees, go three miles east instead of north.
http://pics4.city-data.com/cpicc/cfiles50013.jpg
http://pics4.city-data.com/cpicc/cfiles50013.jpg
Jan 28th 2013, 2:59 am
#44
Joined: Oct 2006
Location: Reno Nevada
Posts: 15,917
Re: Cities in America that make you feel at home?
Although I'v only visited the US, never lived, I can concur with your feeling of "meant to be".
I'm aware that travelling and living somewhere are entirely different. Still, the feeling is there every time.
Can you please expand on why you feel like this? Is it friendlier and have you been able to integrate and make good friends?
I'm aware that travelling and living somewhere are entirely different. Still, the feeling is there every time.
Can you please expand on why you feel like this? Is it friendlier and have you been able to integrate and make good friends?
Jan 28th 2013, 3:09 am
#45
Forum Regular
Joined: Oct 2012
Location: Chapel Hill, NC
Posts: 86
Re: Cities in America that make you feel at home?
If you want trees, go three miles east instead of north.
http://pics4.city-data.com/cpicc/cfiles50013.jpg
http://pics4.city-data.com/cpicc/cfiles50013.jpg
