Ethelred_the_Unready

30+ years? Wow, so to put it into perspective, Wham and The Human League were in the charts when you emigrated? Have you been back much since? It's been almost a mere decade for me and I've been told that Britain has changed.

I'd like to go home though. If I were to have been able to assimilate in the US, it would have happened by now. I have tried, but it's like farting against thunder. When you're a triangle trying to fit into a square, you're basically screwed. I'm here because I love my wife though. To an extent, I have to just swallow it and man up. There are people who would trade anything to be in my position; people who are unhappy in the UK and who would fit in better here.

I don't give a crap about money or possessions. As long as I have food, a roof and maybe an internet connection and a source of music, it's all good. The rat race is tiresome, moronic and banal.

garfro

Yes i go home as often as i can (been over 2 years though) as i am in the process of getting back there to live, I didnt go back for the first 10-11 years as i thought the US was everything i needed,so it was a big change when i got back but subsequent visits i was impressed at how modern things where getting and how comfortably most people lived, I am moving to N Ireland where i have family and the average wage is approx 13000 gbp per annum, and i think that they live nicely, I think when i get settled i can probably live on 100 pound a week
Remember change is good and i cant see lot of changes going on here in the near future as most people dont like change here.

G

sallysimmons

I so agree with this. Britain has changed a lot but mostly for the better IMO. Average people have much better lifestyles than they had when I left 20 years ago, the food is a million times better, and the country is more multi-cultural. Some of the old problems remain (the drinking culture for one, racism for another) but some are long gone.

SadInStates

I understand what you're saying, but the main thing is that taking out citizenship will give you options. Options to move while your mother in law is able to cope, and options to return if/when she isn't.

You say you want to do all these things with your kids, but you won't be able to if you stay in America for your wife and her mother. That $800 flight to holiday in the UK (which I think is on the low side) will be nearer $3000 with two children in tow.

If you have kids here they will grow up American. We're moving back with 4 of ours (aged 10-16) but the 18 y/o wants to stay here alone. He wants nothing to do with the UK. All his finds and life is here. The 14 & 16 y/os would too if they could. From my perspective it is easier if a move with children occurs before they enter their last year of UK primary school, so about the age of 10. That gives you plenty of time to take out citizenship.
On the other hand if you wait too long for your wife to be able to leave her mother it might not happen at all. We had recently resigned ourselves to not moving back until after the kids were grown, because of their ages now, but then my husband was suddenly made redundant and we seized the opportunity.

Victor Meldrew

I disagree. I think British society has changed for the worse.

There are still lots of really nice and honourable people in the UK and if you are careful and lucky you can make sure that these are the people you fill your life with

However, I think there is a large minority (maybe even a majority?) of people whose social skills and beliefs are far worse than was the case 20 years ago.

The media unfortunately bases its content on this section of society as it sells well.

Standard of living? yes I agree the average person is far better off. The problem is they proabably don't realise or appreciate it.

Baaaaahhhhh Humbug!!

Englishmum

How do you know this if you're living in Dubai and only go on quick trips back to the UK? Stop reading the Daily Mail!

sallysimmons

AND GET OFF MY LAWN!

I wonder how far back we'd have to go before we stopped finding people saying things were better in their day.

Stuff changes, some things get worse, some things get better, but if you step back and look at the big picture, it's generally always for the better.

Victor Meldrew

Because I spend between 2 months and 3 months per year in UK, have relatives and friends there, have 2 grown up children there who I pick up a lot of information from and - no I dont read the DM.

I have also taught UK children (and had contact with their parents) for a total and of 21 years prior to moving overseas. I have seen how parental and childrens attitudes have changed considerably.

I base my comments on personal experience not heresay and the DM

Victor Meldrew

This doesnt negate what I have said.

I'm not saying everything was better (you will see I agree with your comments about SoL), I just think societal values and behaviour have worsened on the whole.

I don't have a lawn, I live in an apartment, but if I had one I would be happy to share it with you

Editha

Victor Meldrew, you choose to live in Dubai, a country that has slave labour. How dare you get snooty about values in the UK! I wouldn't even visit Dubai, on moral and ethical grounds.

Ethelred_the_Unready

I don't believe it!

Ethelred_the_Unready

After the day I've had today, I'm just about ready to jump on a plane. Me and the wife are due a long talk.

Meldrew, the UK isn't the only place where society has worsened. Unfortunately, it's a global trend

Mummy in the foothills

What happened to you today?

sallysimmons

You might not think it does, but I do. (Even though I appreciate the offer to share your lawn ).

As we get older, we always think things were better when we were younger. We cast a rosy glow over the past and see the present in the worst light because we don't understand the new mores as well as we understood the old ones.

Today's young kids in hoodies will one day be bemoaning "the youth of today" and their kids will do the same and on and on.

kiwibrit101

I think its just as simple as this........All of us have a sense of belonging that is inherent and the longer we are away from this the more it nags away. For some it becomes to much of a pull and we need to go back. So for good or for bad warts n all.....Blighty is always home (for me)...........So why am I still in NZ 20 years on? lol