One cannot easily however live with one's regrets "if only I'd done so & so"….etc.
I put my 'dream' on hold once, having been offered a shepherding job in Aragon by an Iranian businessman. Having links in both camps it seemed too good to miss; but we did, because of the schooling for our handicapped son would have meant a 40km daily bus ride for him.
We were adult enough to weigh up the consequences.

It is part of the job descrition.

Again I agree with your sentiments, but once again in practice reality rears its ugly head.

A great many of us have to live with regrets about what we did not do, mainly because of family issues, and as a family unit, as adults we have to do the best for all those involved.

And the "my dream/if only I had done so and so" etc should be put aside until the other members of the unit do not have to be swept along in said dream to their detriment.

Because not all dreams are fulfilled, very very few are, and if it was just a couple of adults, I've said before, go for it. However the main concern here is a child with very special needs, needs that most agree will not be better served by moving to Spain. Personally I couldn't care one way or other whether they go or stay, but for me, my overriding concern would be my child and what's best for them, not what's the best for me.

Exactly, that is in the job description of parent.

That is why a large number of expats wait until the young have flown the nest before following their dream.

Returning to Spain was our dream, our children have never had any other interest in Spain, except for seeing family and holidays.

Despite the obvious advantages they would have had here over other children relocating from the uk, so we waited.

I waited until the kids were old enough to vote and had partners before following my dream. A couple of them have since licked me off for moving away, and I sometimes regret having done so.

But I can still get back in a couple of hours and there have been many occasions when they've needed me and I've returned to do what I could.

The time may well come when I need them more than they need me, and I dread it. I dread it for a lot of reasons and when I try and analyse my dread the UK weather seems to be near the top of the list.

Strangely enough, and it must be my choice of UK reading material, I also think of being left on a trolley for many hours in some dirty hospital where the survival rates are abominable.

(And I can't imagine being without electricity for a week).

A slightly disingenuous post don't you think HBG?

People waiting on trolleys does make headlines, as you say it maybe your choice of reading material.

As regards electricity, are you trying to suggest that there is never any interruption to the supply in Spain.?

I personally think this boy with very special needs and his gifted brother will both be better off in the UK to finish their education.

I understand what you're saying, and on that score our Downs son is better off here in Spain. There are more facilities here in Euskadi than ever there were in the UK, despite his virtually nil grasp of Spanish.

It depends on the handicap where some countries do it better than others.

People waiting on trolleys hit the headlines in Malaga last week but none so blind etc.

Moving to Spain will help your gifted son learn Spanish and only Spanish, if as you say you want him to learn as many European languages as he can, surely it would be better to stay in the UK where this can be done without uprooting the whole family.

Either that or to learn a selection of European languages one would have to move to a different country every couple of years.

It can be a difficult task to do the best for each and every child in the family and the bigger the family the bigger the task.

I would keep the security that we already have, without venturing to pastures new, which would be a great upheaval for you all.

You gifted son can shine wherever he lives, your other son has so many more disadvantages and more needs, which I would consider more important, I would let my strongest child fend for himself more, as he is able, as the weaker one cannot.

I think Spain leads the EU when it comes to power failures! We know a guy that gave up living near Canillas way, he lived on a hill and every time there was a decent wind, the O/H cables touched and plunged him into darkness. Read some of the threads of people having to invest in UPS/backup systems.

And a Brit family got around €80-90,000 recently in compensation after doctors failed to detect cancer in a forty odd year old expat that died in Spain.

Forgetting about power cuts in UK and Spain for a second, I must say that I find the Spanish plugs horrible.

Give me the big chunky 3 pin UK ones, that when plugged in, you feel it "hitting home".

Instead of the jiggley, wobbly Spanish ones, I don´t know which system is safer, but the outward aspect of the Spanish plugs are really inferior, and especially when considering the child safety point of view.

It's true what they say about lurid headlines, you can find them anywhere, but to briefly return to the power cuts - I've experienced quite a few in Spain, but none that ever lasted for more than a few hours.

Forgetting the magic of Google and the news channels who seek out bad news wherever they find it, it's really only personal experience that counts, and personal experience depends on a great deal of straightforward luck.

I've been lucky in that I've never had a week-long power cut, never lain on a hospital trolley, and my longest wait at Gatwick was a couple of hours or so when the toilets were working.

But to add some balance, I've waited for hours at various Spanish offices to get some daft funcionario to stamp some daft piece of paper and I had murder on my mind when it was finally, reluctantly handed over.

And I'm already having nightmares over my next round of negotiations with Spanish tradesmen to repair a serious leak in my swimming pool. And this time I think I know what caused the leak, one of the many minor earthquakes over the past few years.

(I've already spoken to the Spanish insurance broker and the cheeky sod wouldn't stop laughing when I suggested making a claim).