The Beast

Well, its here again, this time of year, am I just the one that holds in fear?
The glitter, the tat, all the gaudy crap, just to fill Santas sack,
Of baubles and toys and shameful ploys, and games that make so much noise,
What is the reason for all this shame, as we do it each year, again and again.

I wish we could learn what its really for, the weak and the sad, the lonely and poor,
Others worse off, worse than you and me, other worse off you seldom see,
For that is the reason for Christmas day, to give and to love and to finally pay,
For his gift of life as a child was born, in a stable bare one early morn.

Not to grasp and grab or want and yearn, but to listen and love then try to learn,
That lifes to short to bitch and fight, to steal and rob day and night,
Take a look at what we own, perhaps not much.... But hey, lets not moan,
There are others about without even water who’s lives are filled with naught but slaughter


And pain and death, bitter and twisted, in the Lords big book their name not listed,
Only then will we know what its really for, lets enrich our lives , not be so poor,
I’m afraid I fear, I’m afraid I doubt, noone knows what its all about,
So on we’ll carry year upon year and miss a message thats become quite clear

That its not about us and what we’ve got, but all of the others, ones who have not,
And when we do and feel their pain, we will understand all and clearly gain
The knowledge that we lack, what we can’t see, what we seek and strive and cannot be,
Until we reach this, a level unseen, we will always be what we’ve always been,

Just a punter and his cash, floundering their way, filling Santas sack and having to pay!!

The Beast

Perhaps not so religious?

Santa f#####g Who??

Santa’s a load bollix, flying thru the night,
Tellin all the bastard kids which ones bin a sh#te,
You can ave a dolly, you can ave a gun
Rip open up yer pressies, ave a load a fun.

In the meantime I will eat all the f*****g pies,
Drink up all the Lidle's booze, then tell more f****g lies,
Bout who has been a good lad, who has been a twat,
Then eat a load more f****g pies, who says I am fat?

I’m cuddly, round and fun, full of joy and mirth,
Standin up for Christmas and the virgin birth,
What a barrel o’toss, all this crap and lies,
I am just a weird old tw#t who eats up all the pies.

So when you wake on Christmas morn, your pressies piled on high,
Remember just who put them there, then smile and give a sigh,
Cos it wasn’t fat old Santa, the myth is just a fad,
It was your dear old mother and your pissed up Dad!!

Bahhh Humbug!

JLFS

How dare you diss Santa?

He is a good man,and you come out with this crap.

He is kind to animals, his reindeers only have to work 1 night a year, and he has to feed them for all the year round.

Dick Dasterdly

From what I heard he's a right mean old bugger and this Santa Claus act is all just a front for his real business.

He works the bollox off his reindeer one night of the year till they're absolutely knackered, then tops them, puts them in his freezer and spends the rest of the year eating them and selling a few reindeer sausages plus bits of their hides to tourists, while waiting of the next bunch maturing.

He most likely belongs to one of the Sami tribes who inhabit that part of the World and that is pretty much their way of life.

jimenato

He's a drunken pervert. He sneaks into kids rooms at night, eats mince pies, drinks sherry and then goes next door and shags their mother.

Dick Dasterdly

Well he's gotta have some way of getting his thrills.
That kiddy on the knee business got sussed out a long time ago.

The Beast

A tad more festive doggerel!

Sparkly bells ring, ring a-ringing,
good old Santa he’s a-bringing ,
All the little girls and boys,
lots of special Christmas toys,
For being kind and good and happy,
for not playing up and acting crappy,
For smiling lots and saying please;
and eating up all those peas.
So when you wake on Christmas day;
and with your toys you long to play,
Spare a thought for Mum and Dad,
for they may feel just a little sad,
For when they climbed those stairs last night,
they ended up in a terrible fight,
Cos when Daddy tried to steal a kiss,
from a saucy dressed up little miss,
Mummy saw what he was trying to do,
Mummy saw and then she knew,
The pissed up prat made a fool of hisself,
he ended up snoggin Santas elf!

The Beast

Boxing day again?

St Stephens day is here again, Christmas a thing of the past,
Presents and gifts forgotten and left, their memories seldom last,
Uncles and Aunties, Mums and Dads, sons and sisters all,
Parties over, festive fun and the Christmas ball.

Sated, full, stories to tell… of the fun they’ve had,
Of toys and games and friends they’ve made, a Christmas not half bad,
Back to homes, warm and dry, with tables full and wide,
With family’s bosum open and safe , no need to run and hide.

But out in the world so big and bad, another story can be told,
Of the poor and the weak, the sad and the meek, of many not so bold,
A thought for them as we close our doors, on the cold and the dark and the wet,
Of dreams and prayers and wants and hopes, most of which will not be met.

The lost and the sad the lives they’ve had, many never will be found,
The beaten and the missing, the ones we know, who will never make a sound,
The tall and the brave, the ones who’ve made, their lives so hard live,
Lets remember all that they do, what they say and what they give.

So as we lay us down to rest, after long festive party cheer,
Pray for ones unfortunate enough, to have naught but hate and fear,
That their souls will be caught and held with care and cradled much with love,
And the world be given what it really needs by that white and peaceful dove!