Today's Jokes
Mar 12th 2013 | 9:09 pm
#1
Thread Starter
Hit 16's
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 13,109
From: Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine
Today's Jokes
"Go and have a look at the size of the dump I've just done in the bathroom!" I said to my wife.
"No thanks," she replied.
"Please, just one look," I said. "You won't believe it, it's a good two-pounder."
Shaking her head in disbelief, she pinched her nose, ran in, looked down and shouted, "There's nothing down there, you must've flushed it."
I said, "It's on the scales."
"No thanks," she replied.
"Please, just one look," I said. "You won't believe it, it's a good two-pounder."
Shaking her head in disbelief, she pinched her nose, ran in, looked down and shouted, "There's nothing down there, you must've flushed it."
I said, "It's on the scales."
Mar 12th 2013 | 10:45 pm
#2
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,805
From: Abu Dhabi
Re: Today's Jokes
The capital of North Korea is Pyongyang.
Ironically, it's also the sound a wok makes when you hit a dog on the head with it.
Ironically, it's also the sound a wok makes when you hit a dog on the head with it.
Mar 12th 2013 | 10:53 pm
#3
Shark Fisherman
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 4,568
From: Doha
Re: Today's Jokes
How do you pull a fat bird?
Piece of cake......
Piece of cake......
Mar 12th 2013 | 10:59 pm
#4
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jul 2012
Posts: 453
From: Doha,Qatar
Re: Today's Jokes
Whats the most sensitive part of a woman?
Her fat arse
Her fat arse
Mar 12th 2013 | 11:03 pm
#5
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,579
Re: Today's Jokes
Why don't I find any of these jokes remotely amusing?
Answers on a postcard to...
Answers on a postcard to...
Mar 13th 2013 | 12:06 am
#9
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 585
From: Dubai
Re: Today's Jokes
Who is the coolest guy in a hospital ?
The ultrasound guy
Who is the 2nd coolest guy in a hospital ?
The hip replacement guy
The ultrasound guy
Who is the 2nd coolest guy in a hospital ?
The hip replacement guy
Mar 13th 2013 | 12:34 am
#10
Account Closed
Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 0
Re: Today's Jokes
What do you call a Turkish baby?
Kebabby
How do you get a Turkish baby to stop crying?
Shish Kebabby
Kebabby
How do you get a Turkish baby to stop crying?
Shish Kebabby
Mar 13th 2013 | 12:54 am
#12
Account Closed
Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 3,706
From: Dubai, working at Dust World Central
Re: Today's Jokes
What cheese do you use to get a bear out of a cave?
Camembert
What cheese do you use to blindfold a young horse?
Mascerpone.
What kind of cheese likes to look at itself in the mirror?
Halloumi.
What kind of cheese isn't yours?
Nacho cheese!
Camembert
What cheese do you use to blindfold a young horse?
Mascerpone.
What kind of cheese likes to look at itself in the mirror?
Halloumi.
What kind of cheese isn't yours?
Nacho cheese!
Mar 13th 2013 | 1:23 am
#14
BE Site Lead
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 92,279
From: MA, USA
Re: Today's Jokes
As bad as the jokes in the cheesy jokes thread....superb
Mar 14th 2013 | 10:09 pm
#15
Nothing doin' here
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 3,508
Re: Today's Jokes
My wife packed my bags today after finding out that I had a one night stand with another woman.
"I want you to go!" she screamed.
I said, "Please can we just talk about it first?"
"Go on, I'm listening." she replied.
I sat down and said, "It was the most amazing experience of my entire life."
And, on a similar note...
I caught the wife masturbating during a Rowan Atkinson movie earlier.
She loves a good Bean Flick.
"I want you to go!" she screamed.
I said, "Please can we just talk about it first?"
"Go on, I'm listening." she replied.
I sat down and said, "It was the most amazing experience of my entire life."
And, on a similar note...
I caught the wife masturbating during a Rowan Atkinson movie earlier.
She loves a good Bean Flick.
