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-   -   Having it all? (https://britishexpats.com/forum/sand-pit-116/having-all-677287/)

kittycat1 Jul 19th 2010 1:20 am

Re: Having it all?
 
Unacheiveable as in you get a degree, you have a career, you meet prince charming, you get married, you have kids, you juggle everything and look fabulous and make homemade cakes for the kids school fete and you give your husband a blowjob every night because your also wonderful at keeping him happy as well as you are in fact superwoman.

Your right Sevenseas that perhaps its just trying to put a label on everything, but personally i find the pressures for a woman to settle down are still very high, my mum asks me when I am going to give her grandchildren, my aunts tell me its such a waste that I'm single ( that makes christmas day fun) and now my work colleagues have me down as some kind of reject, but I'm where I am as I love my job- I mean I really really love what I do. I'm happy with what I have and look at my friends who are juggling everything and at how tired they are or at the stress they are under or how they feel exhausted from the kids and the husband and everything else and I wonder how they do it and are they right to try and do it all.

There are only so many hours in the day.

Norm_uk Jul 19th 2010 1:22 am

Re: Having it all?
 

Originally Posted by Bahtatboy (Post 8712196)
What's oral sex?:confused:

That's when you have to talk to the woman, remember her name, offer her tea afterwards and that sort of thing.

Has no place in any decent marriage ;)

N.

Meow Jul 19th 2010 1:30 am

Re: Having it all?
 

Originally Posted by kittycat1 (Post 8712428)
Unacheiveable as in you get a degree, you have a career, you meet prince charming, you get married, you have kids, you juggle everything and look fabulous and make homemade cakes for the kids school fete and you give your husband a blowjob every night because your also wonderful at keeping him happy as well as you are in fact superwoman.

Your right Sevenseas that perhaps its just trying to put a label on everything, but personally i find the pressures for a woman to settle down are still very high, my mum asks me when I am going to give her grandchildren, my aunts tell me its such a waste that I'm single ( that makes christmas day fun) and now my work colleagues have me down as some kind of reject, but I'm where I am as I love my job- I mean I really really love what I do. I'm happy with what I have and look at my friends who are juggling everything and at how tired they are or at the stress they are under or how they feel exhausted from the kids and the husband and everything else and I wonder how they do it and are they right to try and do it all.

There are only so many hours in the day.

Superwoman? No, that'd be superhuman! In the scenario in the first paragraph, he can make the cakes for the fete, your home help does the laundry and cleaning and your husband gives you a masage/oral sex. Having everything, is not the same as working yourself into an early grave by doing everything.

Ignore people with outdated views who put you down for being unmarried. Anyone that really loves and cares about you just wants to see you being happy and fulfilled and that doesn't have to include being married. Having a life partner is great if that makes your life better, but it doesn't always and it's about time society accepted arrangements other than the conventional set up.

Bahtatboy Jul 19th 2010 1:35 am

Re: Having it all?
 

Originally Posted by Norm_uk (Post 8712436)
That's when you have to talk to the woman, remember her name, offer her tea afterwards and that sort of thing.

Has no place in any decent marriage ;)

N.

God, that sounds horrendous. I just thought it was where I put my ...

Confucius Jul 19th 2010 1:41 am

Re: Having it all?
 

Originally Posted by Bahtatboy (Post 8712196)
What's oral sex?:confused:

It's "aural"...As in they get it in the ear...

Confucius Jul 19th 2010 1:43 am

Re: Having it all?
 

Originally Posted by Norm_uk (Post 8712436)
That's when you have to talk to the woman, remember her name, offer her tea afterwards and that sort of thing.

Has no place in any decent marriage ;)

N.

It all went down with the Berlin Wall...

Norm_uk Jul 19th 2010 1:53 am

Re: Having it all?
 

Originally Posted by kittycat1 (Post 8712428)
Unacheiveable as in you get a degree, you have a career, you meet prince charming, you get married, you have kids, you juggle everything and look fabulous and make homemade cakes for the kids school fete and you give your husband a blowjob every night because your also wonderful at keeping him happy as well as you are in fact superwoman.

Your right Sevenseas that perhaps its just trying to put a label on everything, but personally i find the pressures for a woman to settle down are still very high, my mum asks me when I am going to give her grandchildren, my aunts tell me its such a waste that I'm single ( that makes christmas day fun) and now my work colleagues have me down as some kind of reject, but I'm where I am as I love my job- I mean I really really love what I do. I'm happy with what I have and look at my friends who are juggling everything and at how tired they are or at the stress they are under or how they feel exhausted from the kids and the husband and everything else and I wonder how they do it and are they right to try and do it all.

There are only so many hours in the day.

It's interesting, I've spoken to women who say they feel pressured to have careers as well. Pressure is a part of life. Men are pressured to be tough providers who can deal with anything. Relatives and friends are well meaning but often just annoying - that's part of life too and isn't going to change. If you had five children who were all well turned out and behaved someone would still be telling you how to raise them better...everyone else always knows best.

I feel we shouldn't pressure women to do anything except have children sometimes so we don't vanish as a race, nation or species! The whole getting married thing and "settling down" is optional...but as I age I do feel family is important but that family doesn't have to be nuclear and even hetrosexual in order to be healthy, productive and "moral".

I also feel biology is important and really don't see the point of life without trying to be prosperous and successfully reproduce. That's just me though - I want immortality via genetics (already did it once and it's just fantastic) - each to their own.:)

N.

seven seas Jul 19th 2010 1:54 am

Re: Having it all?
 

Originally Posted by kittycat1 (Post 8712428)
Unacheiveable as in you get a degree, you have a career, you meet prince charming, you get married, you have kids, you juggle everything and look fabulous and make homemade cakes for the kids school fete and you give your husband a blowjob every night because your also wonderful at keeping him happy as well as you are in fact superwoman.

I say it is unattainable and designed to pressurise people into stayign onto that treadmill.

Meow- people with outdated views aren't that easy to ignore. They outnumber us by about 1000000 to 1.

And the dear old aunt who pities you for not being married really thinks it is in your best interests and would be thrilled if you did get married.

"MY best interests? What do you know about my interests?"
Institutionalised - by Suicidal Tendencies

Millhouse Jul 19th 2010 2:35 am

Re: Having it all?
 

Originally Posted by Meow (Post 8712340)
Are you saying that men are rubbish then?
-

err. No.

Millhouse Jul 19th 2010 2:37 am

Re: Having it all?
 

Originally Posted by seven seas (Post 8712335)
Men can't have their career, kids, hobbies, friends and wife.

You forgot the mistress

Patsy Stoned Jul 19th 2010 3:45 am

Re: Having it all?
 
Having campaigned in the 70's for womens rights etc I cannot believe that a woman for kitty's age is asking these questions..jeez what was it all for!!!!

It is NOT about a woman having to be "everything" to "everybody" it is about being able to make choices about how you live your life.
It is that fact that we (generally) live in a society that allows people to choose their roles..the key word here is CHOICE.
I chose to get married, I chose NOT to have children. I chose to leave an alcoholic husband. I chose to have a career/independance/lovers etc.
I continue to make choices about my life. I am allowed to do this because people fought to give me the right to choose. This is not a feminist rant, this is what civilised countres do..give all people their right to choose
So now I choose to open a bottle of bubbly :D

The Dean Jul 19th 2010 3:49 am

Re: Having it all?
 
In my limited experience, the oral sex I've had from men hasn't been as good as the oral sex I've had from women............. :huh:

Madam Medusa Jul 19th 2010 3:52 am

Re: Having it all?
 

Originally Posted by The Dean (Post 8712733)
In my limited experience, the oral sex I've had from men hasn't been as good as the oral sex I've had from women............. :huh:

well it's probably never as good when you try to do it to yourself...

MM, xx

littlejimmy Jul 19th 2010 3:57 am

Re: Having it all?
 

Originally Posted by The Dean (Post 8712733)
In my limited experience, the oral sex I've had from men hasn't been as good as the oral sex I've had from women............. :huh:

Especially if they haven't shaved.

Patsy Stoned Jul 19th 2010 3:59 am

Re: Having it all?
 

Originally Posted by The Dean (Post 8712733)
In my limited experience, the oral sex I've had from men hasn't been as good as the oral sex I've had from women............. :huh:

that is because most men won't swallow!


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