Keep chasing dreams or move back?
Oct 11th 2015, 12:29 pm
#46
Born again atheist
Joined: Jul 2005
Location: Europe (to be specified).
Posts: 30,259
Oct 11th 2015, 12:35 pm
#47
Was in Canada, now home.
Joined: Aug 2011
Location: Devon
Posts: 3,388
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
I revised my post because it isn't based on fahren, but führung.
There are still a few tickets left, if you hop on a plane!
There are still a few tickets left, if you hop on a plane!
Last edited by Editha; Oct 11th 2015 at 12:39 pm.
Oct 11th 2015, 12:52 pm
#49
Joined: Dec 2001
Location: Dixie, ex UK
Posts: 52,439
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
An update on this.
I've been back in the UK for 5 weeks and just can't settle back in. My friends have all gone their own ways and I miss certain things in California. I ended up spending most days and nights alone in the bedroom I grew up in at my parents house.
Now I feel like I'm in limbo. After being offered my old job back in California, I decided to give it another go. This time focusing more on socializing now that I know 'the grass is greener back home' is a myth.
The problem is my parents. I've really hurt them both by saying I was moving back. My dad is upset but holding it in, and my mom verbally attacking me saying I'm worthless and will never amount to anything. I'm sure it's just the hurt talking but it affects me deeply.
So now, I'm holed up in a hotel alone, waiting for my flight back to the US tomorrow, with no idea what's the right path, and completely upset about my parents.
I've been back in the UK for 5 weeks and just can't settle back in. My friends have all gone their own ways and I miss certain things in California. I ended up spending most days and nights alone in the bedroom I grew up in at my parents house.
Now I feel like I'm in limbo. After being offered my old job back in California, I decided to give it another go. This time focusing more on socializing now that I know 'the grass is greener back home' is a myth.
The problem is my parents. I've really hurt them both by saying I was moving back. My dad is upset but holding it in, and my mom verbally attacking me saying I'm worthless and will never amount to anything. I'm sure it's just the hurt talking but it affects me deeply.
So now, I'm holed up in a hotel alone, waiting for my flight back to the US tomorrow, with no idea what's the right path, and completely upset about my parents.
Anyhow, welcome "home" to the US and good luck with the next chapter of your life. .....
Oct 11th 2015, 3:03 pm
#50
Concierge
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 46,382
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
I just started reading this thread this morning and while I'm an American and probably should not be posting here at all, I have to say that I feared that when you returned to the UK that you would find that your friends had moved on to lives that no longer included you. It is normal.
It is not easy to make friends in the US. Americans know this, while many of us hate to admit it. I've found in the course of my life that it is easier to make friends if you leave yourself open to people. Meaning just saying a simple hello to people you see daily. I have the greatest friend right now that I only met 8 years ago with a simple hello while waiting for the morning train. It took two years before we started doing things together but now it is as if we have always been friends. We go to the theater, movies, dinner and have traveled to Europe twice together.
While I think you are moving back to the US too soon, not having given the UK and yourself enough time to make a new life, I am glad you are back and with the attitude that socialization will be one of your main objectives.
Parents can be ridiculous sometimes. My mum left Germany in 1948 and never went back. She left behind a sister who she talked with and wrote to and who even visited here in the States, but mum was adamant that she would never return to German soil and she never did. And yet, she brow beated my sis and I that in Germany one takes care of their parents and relatives above all others. Bit of a hypocrite in my eyes. Don't take your mum's words to heart. It is your life and you are free to live it the way you choose. Be happy.
It is not easy to make friends in the US. Americans know this, while many of us hate to admit it. I've found in the course of my life that it is easier to make friends if you leave yourself open to people. Meaning just saying a simple hello to people you see daily. I have the greatest friend right now that I only met 8 years ago with a simple hello while waiting for the morning train. It took two years before we started doing things together but now it is as if we have always been friends. We go to the theater, movies, dinner and have traveled to Europe twice together.
While I think you are moving back to the US too soon, not having given the UK and yourself enough time to make a new life, I am glad you are back and with the attitude that socialization will be one of your main objectives.
Parents can be ridiculous sometimes. My mum left Germany in 1948 and never went back. She left behind a sister who she talked with and wrote to and who even visited here in the States, but mum was adamant that she would never return to German soil and she never did. And yet, she brow beated my sis and I that in Germany one takes care of their parents and relatives above all others. Bit of a hypocrite in my eyes. Don't take your mum's words to heart. It is your life and you are free to live it the way you choose. Be happy.
Oct 14th 2015, 8:49 am
#51
Finally Home!
Joined: Mar 2010
Location: Used to be New York, now North Yorkshire
Posts: 3,610
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
There is absolutely nothing to stop you pursuing your writing career just because you don't live in LA or have a Masters degree. In fact, I'd bet that a Masters degree makes very little difference either way.
If you're good enough, you're good enough. That's that.
Please don't let that false idea determine whether you stay or go. You can learn just as much by reading books and writing, writing, writing every night after work - and you'll be doing it at home with friends and family around you.
I'm working on developing an art career and this post was really helpful to me - I hope it helps you too:
THE ULTIMATE CHEAT SHEET FOR REINVENTING YOURSELF - Altucher Confidential
As for giving up the dream of living in LA .... sometimes our dreams are there to wake us up to what we really want. Without having left, we can't find out that we were supposed to stay
If you're good enough, you're good enough. That's that.
Please don't let that false idea determine whether you stay or go. You can learn just as much by reading books and writing, writing, writing every night after work - and you'll be doing it at home with friends and family around you.
I'm working on developing an art career and this post was really helpful to me - I hope it helps you too:
THE ULTIMATE CHEAT SHEET FOR REINVENTING YOURSELF - Altucher Confidential
As for giving up the dream of living in LA .... sometimes our dreams are there to wake us up to what we really want. Without having left, we can't find out that we were supposed to stay
Oct 15th 2015, 6:33 am
#52
Forum Regular
Joined: Sep 2015
Location: 6,606 miles, 077.69 deg(T), from my home town.
Posts: 125
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
Good post..
Oct 15th 2015, 1:57 pm
#53
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 360
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
Best of luck.. I feel maybe you are heading back to the U.S too soon but if things don't work out for you, well you can always come back to the U.K.
Oct 15th 2015, 5:50 pm
#54
BE Enthusiast
Joined: May 2012
Location: Nebraska by the Sea
Posts: 987
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
There is absolutely nothing to stop you pursuing your writing career just because you don't live in LA or have a Masters degree. In fact, I'd bet that a Masters degree makes very little difference either way.
If you're good enough, you're good enough. That's that.
Please don't let that false idea determine whether you stay or go. You can learn just as much by reading books and writing, writing, writing every night after work - and you'll be doing it at home with friends and family around you.
I'm working on developing an art career and this post was really helpful to me - I hope it helps you too:
THE ULTIMATE CHEAT SHEET FOR REINVENTING YOURSELF - Altucher Confidential
As for giving up the dream of living in LA .... sometimes our dreams are there to wake us up to what we really want. Without having left, we can't find out that we were supposed to stay
If you're good enough, you're good enough. That's that.
Please don't let that false idea determine whether you stay or go. You can learn just as much by reading books and writing, writing, writing every night after work - and you'll be doing it at home with friends and family around you.
I'm working on developing an art career and this post was really helpful to me - I hope it helps you too:
THE ULTIMATE CHEAT SHEET FOR REINVENTING YOURSELF - Altucher Confidential
As for giving up the dream of living in LA .... sometimes our dreams are there to wake us up to what we really want. Without having left, we can't find out that we were supposed to stay
Last edited by vikingsail; Oct 15th 2015 at 5:52 pm. Reason: 2 fingered typist
Oct 15th 2015, 6:49 pm
#55
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Aug 2010
Location: US
Posts: 4,224
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
I was there last week in Thousand Oaks. I have sympathy for those folks.
Glad to away from there!
Strange because I moved to LA in 1963 when California was all the rage. I then move to San Francisco in less than a year because of employment.
Nice that you can move back to the UK any time. Way to go
Cheers
Oct 17th 2015, 3:24 pm
#56
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Nov 2012
Location: bute
Posts: 9,740
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
When we emigrate, we get "stuck in time" as Kurt Vonnegut says of his hero Billy Pilgrim. I left Scotland in 1970 to work in the Middle East. I am now stuck forever in Ediburgh circa 1970 ! Weird.
Oct 20th 2015, 11:18 am
#57
Finally Home!
Joined: Mar 2010
Location: Used to be New York, now North Yorkshire
Posts: 3,610
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
Oct 21st 2015, 8:59 pm
#58
Born again atheist
Joined: Jul 2005
Location: Europe (to be specified).
Posts: 30,259
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
We have returned to Newcastle (but will spend half of each year in France). We're not stuck anywhere in time...
Newcastle is an immensely more attractive place to live these days.
We even have a Pilgrim Street.
Oct 21st 2015, 9:19 pm
#59
Joined: Dec 2001
Location: Dixie, ex UK
Posts: 52,439
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
Just like we moved on, so did the cities that we left behind. I have memories of Sheffield, but having probably only visited there two or three times in the past twenty years and not more than a couple of dozen times since I left Sheffield as a child, the Sheffield that I remember is long gone.
Oct 27th 2015, 8:23 am
#60
Finally Home!
Joined: Mar 2010
Location: Used to be New York, now North Yorkshire
Posts: 3,610
Re: Keep chasing dreams or move back?
I think he just means he has fond memories of a place that no longer exists.
Just like we moved on, so did the cities that we left behind. I have memories of Sheffield, but having probably only visited there two or three times in the past twenty years and not more than a couple of dozen times since I left Sheffield as a child, the Sheffield that I remember is long gone.
Just like we moved on, so did the cities that we left behind. I have memories of Sheffield, but having probably only visited there two or three times in the past twenty years and not more than a couple of dozen times since I left Sheffield as a child, the Sheffield that I remember is long gone.
