johnformby

Hello,

I was just wondering how other people have made friends when returning to the UK?

I am British and my wife is Ghanaian. I have been outside the country for a number of years and I don't really know anyone. My wife also doesn't know anyone.

We would like to make a circle of friends, but not sure how to go about it. I do a lot of consultancy work, so don't get to make friends through work and my wife doesn't work at the moment.

Any advice you can give us would be appreciated.

Thanks,

John

Novocastrian

Hi John,

Where have you settled in the UK?

johnformby

Hi,

We have settled near Liverpool.

We are both in our 30's.

Thanks,

John

jam25mack

Pub!

spouse of scouse

Hi John. We're on the Wirral but we're oldies, so my methods for meeting people are probably different to yours! But here's what I did - I'm an Aussie on a spouse visa, my husband's a British citizen.

Enrolled in a further education course at Liverpool Uni (Italian language course), met loads of nice people in our class.

Agree about the pub! Especially if you have a 'local'.

My husband calls me Mrs Avachat, so I've met quite a few people just chatting in local shops.

Neighbours, but only if they don't look dodgy

Do you have any sporting interests or hobbies? Joining a local group/club is a great way to meet people. Similarly, any local branches of professional organisations you're a member of.

Voluntary work is a good way for my age group (retired) to meet people, but being young you probably don't have time for that.

You could also check if there are any local Ghanaian cultural groups, or even groups of newly arrived migrants.

Doesn't really matter where it is, if you're open and friendly and take the time to chat with people, you'll make friends. Best of luck for your move.

scrubbedexpat094

Try joining a club of some sort be it arty, sporty, historical or whatever. Certainly the pub is a good place to start. Is Formby your surname or where you are living? There's the National Trust reserve for red squirrels and natterjack toads at Freshfields. The NT are always looking for volunteers.

Not an easy time to establish friendships in the UK. Most of the inhabitants will be in semi-hibernation! You'll see more of them come spring . Northern folk are generally friendly once they've got to know you a bit.

spouse of scouse

If John is in Formby, I take back the 'dodgy neighbours' thing. Dodgy people can't afford to live in Formby

scrubbedexpat094

Well not unless they are drug dealers. Some are to be found in Eccleston, shock, horror. It's not like the days when Liverpool players used to live in Eccleston because it was posh .

Editha

Voluntary work, the Women's Institute (for your wife), the British Legion, any political party, a gardening club, working men's club, Conservative club, bell-ringing, local community association, line-dancing/folk dancing; the list is endless. You can get an idea of what is available in your area from the local newspapers, and the local library.

We throw a party for the neighbours every year, which is a good way to get to know them.

not2old

How did you make friends in the country that you left before returning to the UK?

How long have you been back in the UK?

Do you & your wife shop together, go to the movies, the library, go to the park, travel on a bus or train, walk down the street, nod at folks ]'nice morning ain't it it] etc. If you are a Liverpool area lad then you'll know folks in Merseyside & the Wirral districts are as friendly a people as anyone & will speak to anyone at anytime.

Local church group is one that might work

So you consult, you meet people, you have lunch or coffee with some of them. Its the ice breaker, unless of course you & the missus don't want to mix with people ever.

Did you mix with people in the other parts of the world that you lived?

BTW, Formby is a nice place (snobbish maybe), as is all the areas on the train line between Liverpool & Southport - plently to see & do with many many people from all walks of life ready to talk about all kinds of nonesense

Lets throw a party, invite yourself to one.... folks from consulting, what do they have to say?

johnformby

Hello,

Thank you for all the responses, some good suggestions.

To answer a few questions:

I am from Formby originally, but am living a few miles away in Crosby now. We don't seem to have any neighbours close to our age and people tend to keep themselves to themselves. Maybe it is the weather as was suggested previously.

My wife is from Ghana, so all the people we socialised with when I was working there were through her. I do like to integrate into the local culture but since I do a lot of consultancy work, I don't tend to make lasting friendships with the people I work with as I often end up in different locations. I am actually quite comfortable with my own company, but since my wife will be at home all day, it would be nice for her to have a group of friends. We have a young son and another on the way, so hoping that we can find a toddler group in the local area.

We have been back for 5 weeks and have been going to our local church, but there doesn't seem to be much of an active social scene unfortunately. The usual nods and greetings, but everyone seems to run away as soon it finishes.

I am really into running, hiking and cycling, so am sure I can join some clubs for this. This post is really more for my wife because I want her to feel comfortable and enjoy living here.

Thanks,

John

Editha

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