bourbon-biscuit

Genesis, not to sound too trite but I think Stephen King's words hold true for you: Get busy living or get busy dying.

Move back to the UK- your kids will be fine, Kate will find work and you can afford to buy a decent home. Do it now before they get too old and you get too bitter. Then you can have fond memories of the good times in NZ, have given your kids an experience and opportunity for later in life and you can move on. Don't spend the next two years whining on the forum- just get on with it.

Genesis

I am very busy living thank you and can assure those worried posters about the welfare of my kids that they are quite happy too inspite of having such a depressed, unhappy and aimless father.

I come on here for a few minutes every other day or so and I post the odd reply and do the odd thread. I am just having an air of my feelings. I am not sitting here in tears wishing I was in the Uk or anywhere else right now. I simply posed the question would I come here with hindsight?

Some folk have got pretty wound up and if they think I am being boring, whinging, a twat or whatever just keep it inside your head okay? Exactly as I say to my son. Is this not a website where we discuss the pros and cons of a country? Well I thought this thread may well illicit both positive and negative posts and be food for thought for those who are thinking of coming here.

It appears that if you say anything deemed to be 'too happy' or that is a 'too much of a slate of NZ' some people take umbridge. Its just a bloody country not your nearest, beloved relative...don't take it so personally and more over STOP bothering about me!

bourbon-biscuit

My point was that I'm 100% certain your kids are fine whatever you choose- so choose for you. I'm not worried about you; it's your life, do as you please with it.

I'd put money on that if you don't make plans to move on you're going to whinge on here for eternity and while you say it's only 2 mins of your day, I suspect that perspective stays with you for longer.

Kate's a nurse and your kids are young- it's not too late for you to even consider Oz and you at least have the cash for property on Tassie, if that's your preference.

scrubbedexpat094

Ah hindsight, tis a wonderful thing.

Do you know what? I don't know. If we hadn't come then in 20 years time, we'd be wondering "What if...."

Sometimes I wish we had never come. We came as a bit of an adventure. We couldn't have children, though we had given it a good try & spent lots of dosh in the process & we were living our lives thinking "Is this it? What do we do now?" So we came to New Zealand, ping-ponged back because I hated it the first time & then returned 20 months later.

Been here for over 5 years now, have citizenship & like some aspects of living here & dislike others. Just the same as I feel about Britain really. However, I was born & bred in the latter & it will always be home. I feel a really strong pull for it some days & less so on others.

So I'm a mass of contradictions & I guess I'll stay that way unless I reach some sort of epiphany.

BEVS

Good post for me Big Sticks.

Most likely not.

Caz8NZ

interesting. i umm and ahh on a daily basis. i probably am going to be a ping pong brit - and whats the harm in that! Its quite nice to have the option to live here or there!

Justcol

I'm liking this thread a lot

Karma to everyone

lardyl

yes I would provided I had spent the intervening 5 1/2 years earning some serious cash and taught myself that I don't have to do my job "properly" to remain sane

crap coffee

Thats right........

bourbon-biscuit

I've been thinking about this all day and I've decided I would have come, but only for it to be a year's experience and that's not because of any fault of NZ but because all my family live in Britain, my cultural heritage is British and mostly I feel sad that my kids don't really know their UK family and probably never will. Will they grow up and say "thanks for the lovely big garden and the quiet neighbourhood and the long summers and all that- it was a worthwhile trade for my wider family"?

Now I want to go home

Tomsk

For me it's an overwhelming yes. If I'd known then what I know now, then yes, I would still make the move.
To be honest I didn't particularly want to come to NZ. My husband was the driving force behind us moving out here, he got the job offer, & in fact he put in a tentative query re jobs without even telling me. I only got to find out when there was a serious possibility of said job coming to fruition. I had a nice life in the UK, friends aplenty, family all a bit scattered but in regular contact, a nice home, growing up children, & a job that bored me a bit, but the hours were good & whilst I was never going to get rich on what they paid me we were comfortable.
So I came with a fair degree of reluctance, but agreeing to stick it out for 2 years & review, and given that was very happy to view it as an adventure. And it's been that for sure! We've had our ups & downs, plenty of both, & it's surely not all been plain sailing. But we've had some fabulous experiences & have made some great friends who I honestly hope I can continue to call friends wherever in the world we end up. Our children are confident, happy adults, now both enjoying university life at Vic uni in Wellington, & they have proved to themselves that they are adaptable enough to transition between different countries & thrive in both places.
We have had lots of visitors from the UK, friends & family alike (in fact, ungrateful mare that I am there was a point last summer when I was a little bit over playing host to so many guests!), & we have had several others express their intention to visit in the not too distant future. Skype, email & Facebook, as well as the good old telephone, have been great at allowing us to stay in touch.
I'm still not sure if this is going to be a forever move, I'm certainly happy enough here for now, but things may well change in the future, & if we hit the point when it seems right to return to the UK, or even move on elsewhere then we shall. But, whatever happens, I genuinely think that this has been a huge opportunity & an adventure I wouldn't want to have missed out on.
So glad I'm not still sitting in Dartford in my dull job & wondering "what if"!

phyns

That is a great post.

Genesis, I think parts of NZ can be a crap hole. I've never understood why someone would want to live in Auckland but you state that you only want to start debate but comments like "banana republic and tin pot economy" are offensive and likely to cause conflict, not debate.

dannigirl

+1

You also forgot our annoying accents which is also a common complaint

Jan n Neil

Yeahh, nhaa

BEVS

Oh noes.

I really like this BB

I might amend my previous post to be the above once I have thought about it a bit.