Scared stiff....

Old Apr 3rd 2009, 12:27 pm
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Default Scared stiff....

Hello all.
My name is Robyn, my husband and i are planning on moving to NZ hopefully end of next year. My husband is really up for it and excited but im afraid im just sooooo nervous, i know it will be a brilliant life for our son who is 2 and a half and us but i just cant stop thinking about leaving my friends and family.
My hubbies bro lives in Auckland and has offered him a job at the company he works for...we have decided to come over for a holiday in Nov and check things out etc and i have told him that i will go for 2 years and then we will reasess the situation after that as i know it is something he really wants.
The job is based in North shore and i checked photos out and it just looks so lovely.
I am thinking positive about it and looking forward to it and reading all these posts does make me feel happier about it.
The main thing i worry about is making friends my hubby will be ok as he will be working but i will need to be at home to look after my son are there alot of toddler groups and ways of meeting friends for both my son and i? i like alot of women really need my girly friends as i would go mad with out them....so any tips about making friends will be very much appricaited...
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Old Apr 3rd 2009, 4:01 pm
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Default Re: Scared stiff....

hi shopperholic. Its understandable to be scared stiff - i am too! Looks like we'll be out there middle of next month, moving to Hamilton. We are expecting our first baby in July so making this whole move when 6 months pregnant is a little scary in itself. I also worry about making new friends over there, I have tried looking up mother & baby groups as well - there's an organisation called Plunket (i think it might be a bit like what the NCT is) they run classes & groups, try going to their website through google.co.nz & enter the area which you'l be living, it should tell you if they have classes there or near by. If they do classes then i'm sure you will end up making friends through there no problem. Everyone keeps telling me you always make friends with new people when pregnant or with young kids anyway. For someone like me who usually struggles to talk to new people - i can only hope they are right! I will miss my friends & family back here terribly, but I know there's always the old facebook to fall back on, I can chat to my friends in UK through there so whilst I wont be able to see them I can still talk to them. Maybe also when your husband settles into his new job, he'll make friends with other colleagues and then you'll get to know their wives. Keep thinking positive Robyn.
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Old Apr 4th 2009, 11:59 am
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Default Re: Scared stiff....

It's a reasonable concern...one tip I feel I must share...do not tell everyone you meet that you are only here for 2 years and then you plan to reassess....keep that bit to yourself or else many Kiwis will write you off as not worth the effort getting to know. Make it appear you have emigrated even if you feel you are only temporarily expatriated.

With kids it is usually easier to meet people..and the younger the kids are, the more likely it is you will find 'stay-at-home' Mums to pass time with. It should also be easier because of your brother in law etc etc.
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Old Apr 7th 2009, 2:46 pm
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Default Re: Scared stiff....

Thank you for your replies....
I am feeling more positive now from reading through all the posts. and i am now thinking it is defo the right think for us to do....i dont want to look back in 10 years time and regret not doing it..
I think its just the fact that i have lived in surrey all my life and have a wonderful group of girlfriends that i have been friends with since i was 10 years old and i pop to the shops and always see a familiar face...thats what im going to find hard??? I am a very outgoing and loud person but i defo struggle talking to new people....
And i do agree that when you have kids or are pregnant that its so much easier to meet people.
I am now thinking positive and excited about the prospect of moving somewhere new and exciting....even though i have read the clothes and shoes and shopping arnt up to much...but have told my husband that i need to do lots and lots of shopping before we go next year....bye bye savings.
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Old Apr 8th 2009, 1:19 pm
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Default Re: Scared stiff....

Snap - your not alone!! but I think it's something we've got to try. I too don't want to be sitting 10/20 years down the line wondering what life would be like if we'd only tried.
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Old Apr 9th 2009, 5:02 am
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Default Re: Scared stiff....

We don't have the wide circle of friends we left in UK, but the ones we've made here are worth the effort. It's two years this month, and reassessing would only confirm that we did the right thing coming over.
We've actually become closer as a couple, but the new group of friends is still growing.
One big tip from me (Steve), is that if you are invited to pop in anytime, then do it. You'll be frowned on next time you see people for not going round, then bought a coffe/beer/muffin, and told that they mean it.........they do! God I love this place
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Old Apr 28th 2009, 5:59 pm
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Wink Re: Scared stiff....

Just go for it!! Good luck!
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Old Apr 29th 2009, 10:16 am
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Default Re: Scared stiff....

There are some really lovely places to live round Auckland Robyn. We moved here 4 years ago when my son was 19 months. I went to one of the local parks and just started talking to people, they told me where and when all the local Playgroups/Playcentre etc is. I didnt like living in the centre of Auckland but since being out here Ive never looked back. I even had another child (something I said I would NEVER do... long and painful story)... my little boy is now 5 and at the local school and my little girl is 2.... I have fun taking her to Playgroup, Mainly Music... plenty of coffee mornings, meetups in the parks and on the beaches... and shes just started swimming lessons now this week too.... theres plenty for you and your little one to do, just be prepared to get out and ask whats going on. Theres plenty of parks round here (sorry I dont know North Shore at all apart from the beach at Orewa)... and the beaches just here are fantastic for littlies as we are surrounded by islands and the waves are very small. We feel very lucky to live in such a beautiful wonderful place. I hope you get to make the move and love it as much as we do... good luck!
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