British Expats - Question

British Expats (https://britishexpats.com/forum/)

- New Zealand (https://britishexpats.com/forum/new-zealand-83/)

- - Question (https://britishexpats.com/forum/new-zealand-83/question-433996/)

actually I can't see how derogatory that is - Uk kiwi has posted lots of happy posts - I've yet to see you post one - therefore - I know she is - I don't know, yet that you are.

Nope - not more objective - 'yeh right' is my reply to you on that quote ( as it was yours) and to anyone else who feels that, and I'm sticking to it! :D
Don't worry though I wont bother to reply ( even though that was the first time I have actually entered into the conversation.) I know when to stop.

And actually if you read my post again I was very careful to say "people" not you in particular.

It would have been derogatory and very funny ( IMVHO) if Pixie had said

Take a chill pill

Sorry - but it is funny. I think.

Ferg :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by pixi-dust (Post 4515968)

and of course you have seen every post I have made?

being unable to see that a comment is derogatory doesn't make it not derogatory!

That was a reply...DOH!!!

Saying people and inserting my quote kinda leads one to believe you are refering to me...DOH x 2 !!!

All a matter of opinion though, isn't it?

Phil, to me, in this thread, you do come across as very angry and a little rude, I'm sorry if you're not, I've no doubt you are a very nice person in real life. But could it be that's why people have jumped on you? They probably don't have time to read all your posts so are just commenting on what they've read in this topic.

I have tried to look at it impartially as I don't know anyone but that is what it looks like to me. I had a look back at some of the posters other posts (there must be a better way of writing that) and none of them seem particularly argumentative, quite the opposite actually.

But then again I am very new here too, so of course, I may be talking bollox. :)

Ferg

Quote:

Originally Posted by anarkissed bathmat (Post 4516344)

mmm well it's not Phil it's Debbie and as I said previously yes I got angry because all I did was put a reply on to a relatively simple question, my reply was not rude, it was not critical of any individual and it didn't challenge anyones thoughts, feelings or opinions. I didn't pick up someone elses post and say NO YOUR WRONG COS THIS IS WHAT I THINK AND I AM RIGHT, the original post is on page 1, it was quite simply my reasons for coming here, as the post thread asked.

But what happened next was people weren't replying to the actual thread just disecting my reply...which I am sure you can appreciate is personal opinion.. if they so desperately wanted to post on this thread why not give their answer to the thread question, which is what I thought was the purpose of posting on a thread, not to have a go at others that have posted.

I never requested any comments on my personal opinions, and UK+Kiwi disected my whole response, had he/she actually answered the thread it would have been more bearable but he/she didn't (probably because the person is living in the UK and was not in a position to answer the thread of what bought them here) so the intention as I interpret it was not to answer the actual thread rather to pick fault with other peoples responses, not a very considerate thing to do and clearly showing they just wanted to provoke that person into a battle...when your opinions are challenged and experiences are questioned that is all the end result can be. I wasn't looking for comment on my opinion..I was simply giving it. It was never intended to upset people but do I really need to sit here just saying hey ho...happy day everyone...that is hardly valid and is not exactly enticing reading or even remotely useful now is it?

I felt that disecting and questioning my post was rather rude, quite patronising and totally uncalled for...it's not my thread and as someone that simply placed a response based on their own opinion, thoughts, feelings and experiences I felt I was being unjustifiably attacked, so yes I responded, I certainly had no intention of being rude but when someone questions whether your experiences are genuine it's insulting...why does it have to become an attack on an individuals personal response...which however dressed up is exactly what it became.

If people feel that they want to respond to a thread they should do that but isn't it better to give your answer to the actual question rather than challenge other peoples responses...that quite simply looks like they are trying to pick an argument rather than contribute to a discussion.

Then to be told that I don't post happy posts...well that was merely comical...judgemental...but comical...unless you have read every post by that person again is that a fair comment to make...no it isn't and it is again insulting and can only be interpreted as insulting whether intentioned or not.

I have no gripes with anyone on this site but feel that my personal experiences, thoughts and feelings are as valid as anyone else's but unlike others I respond to the actual question.

Threads always go off subject, it's a fact of forum life so you'll probably have to get used to it.

MMMmmm Debbie - life's too short.

Can I ask again that everyone just calm down, either that or let this thread die a natural death with no more posts?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nice Guy (Post 4516645)

Can I ask again that everyone just calm down, either that or let this thread die a natural death with no more posts?

Why don't you talk about sex for a change - that always makes me smile...............:) ;)

Makes me smile as well!

Mrs Nice Guy just laughs for some reason and I don't know why!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nice Guy (Post 4516877)

Makes me smile as well!

Mrs Nice Guy just laughs for some reason and I don't know why!

Ahhhh.........but are you smiling from the hips up?:thumbup:

Quote:

Originally Posted by phil01 (Post 4510792)

No I didn't as I said I lived in a beautiful little village that bordered Sherwood Forest, but like you I could afford to move further out of town. The inner cities are like that and you don't need to live there to be aware of it and afraid of it...if it only took me 45 minutes to get home by car it would only take the same time for the yob element to do it too. I'm certainly not saying that the whole of the UK is like that, but with 70 plus million people crime is far more likely to happen than it is with 4 million people.

The UK has bred a benefits culture, they have the highest teen pregnancy rates in the EU, they have relatively high unemployment it may be dressed up in various ways, incapacity etc..etc... but the yob element exists because of the lack of opportunities for younger people, teen pregnancies happen because of the lack of opportunities for younger people and crime happens again for the same reason. The country is overflowing and competition for the good life is high, more people doesn't equate to more opportunities it equates to more competition.

I know there are some nice places in the UK but there are far more unpleasant places - hence huge numbers of migrants in search of a better life, but for some choices do not exist, some people can't up sticks and move away they have to suffer the inner city lifestyle. For me NZ is may be the same land mass as the UK but has nowhere near the same problems, be it partly due to politics, open door policies, overcrowding whatever the reason those that can get out clearly choose to and if the UK was such a fab place they wouldn't even consider leaving.

Quote:

Originally Posted by uk+kiwi (Post 4512985)

How many people do you honestly know that live in an area like this? Typical Daily Mail stuff. And then, have you visited areas like this in NZ? Because they exist too. Except possibly for 'true' council estates - does NZ even have them?

Yes this stuff happens and of course it shouldn't. And please don't think I'm just turning something of a blind eye because these things luckily don't affect me. (Touch wood). Petrol bombed cars? Thankfully haven't ever seen one. But of course my impression of a country, like yours, is based on what I see and experience. And yob culture is not something I see.

I actually thought the crime stats showed NZ to be worse than the UK, on a per capita basis. Domestic violence is much more common in NZ for example.

I know NZ is very different to the UK, but it is always important to compare like with like. I'm not sure where would compare to a small village on the outskirts of Nottingham, but from what you've said, I would have thought a small village on the outskirts of the worst crime area/very low socioeconomic area in NZ (don't know where that is).

Instead, you probably now live nowhere near a 'Nottingham' so the comparison is not relative. Albeit your improved reality is. The critical point thus being, is that your life is better, not only because of a country move, but probably because you moved to a comparatively much better/nicer area, which the UK also has in abundance, but is possibly out of many migrants reach (in terms of housing costs?) I don't know.

Either way, bottom line on a personal note is that if you prefer your life in NZ, then the move was right for you. :) Enjoy.

There are some areas of South Auckland that are simply no-go zones. Most families on benefit, gang culture and gun culture on the increase :eek:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Campbells (Post 4517080)

There are some areas of South Auckland that are simply no-go zones. Most families on benefit, gang culture and gun culture on the increase :eek:

We lived in South Auckland for 3 weeks when first got here..... took me 3 days to say I wanted out.... just didnt like it at all and we didnt want our container to arrive whilst we were still there so go out as fast as we could.