When did u know?
 

When did you know that Australia wasn't for you?

Re: When did u know?
 

Week 2!!! I'm still hanging on in there, 10 months later!!
Dilemma - Husband wants me to be happy and is prepared to go back to UK, but I want him to be happy and he wants to stay. We don't know what to do.
Still at major discussion stage!

How is things with you?

:)

Re: When did u know?
 

I think there was a thread exactly the same as this not long ago which had some good advice - maybe do a seach for it?
Hope you work it out soon.

Re: When did u know?
 

You're right, there was ....

http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=256158

Re: When did u know?
 

When I was about to board the plane to Singapore!! :scared:

No really, I think I felt that Perth wasn't for us after about a month but I kept pushing the feelings away. I can remember when we were signing the papers for our mortgage thinking - 'well, when we go back we can sell it' !!!! I knew when we were buying the house that there was no way I was going to stay.

We went for a day trip with some friends to Gingin (about 1 hour north of Perth) and I looked out over the hills and fields and I felt terrified at the thought of staying in Australia. So far from everything I knew.

Even after 6 months and then a year, I felt exactly the same as did our daughter.

Re: When did u know?
 

So why go through with all the moving? god some people dont know when they got it good.

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I think your question answers itself. Some times we have to move in order to realize the place we want to be is the place we left. Also, of course some people didn't have much choice. A lot of people on this board move because of a spouse from the other country.

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Some times we have to move in order to realize the place we want to be is the place we left.[/QUOTE]



Brilliant quote!! :)

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Agreed!!

Merlot

Re: When did u know?
 

Hi there! I started the thread which the link relates to above in PollyAnna's post.

Well, we have been here, in Canada, now for just over 7 months and I still feel the same way. Things ARE more settled and life is "normal" now but I still miss England. We have friends, a pretty good social life, our eldest 2 are at school but ... it's not my home.

I'm not naive enought to think that I will always feel this way, I'm sure over time (a good few years!) I would come to think of Canada as home. The point is, I don't want to wait a few years for that feeling to come. I miss England, the Britishness of it, the history, the decent food, the proximity to Europe. I could go on, and not including family and friends.

I have come to the conclusion that whilst emigrating is right for some people it is not right for others. The problem is you don't which category you fit in to until you do it! I don't regret coming here, it has been an experience. If someone told me I could never return to the UK, I could fairly happily live here the rest of my life. The thing is I don't have to and so we have decided to return to the UK, hopefully sometime this year but if not then by next year.

The experiences are different for everyone. I think most people will go through a eurphoric period in the early stages, followed by a period of "oh, my goodness, what have we done?" and then will almost definitely feel homesick. The thing is for some people this passes and they move on, for others this feeling never goes away.

Try not to listen to what others tell you and just go on your own instincts. Give it some time and see if your feelings change. But nothing in life is written in stone, you can change your mind, you can make further changes.

Re: When did u know?
 

[QUOTE=JoolsG]

The point is, I don't want to wait a few years for that feeling to come.

QUOTE]

I made this point as well.

Others can go on about 'life is short and you only live once' so go try and live somewhere different.

My point is 'life is short and you only live once' so follow your heart and don't stay somewhere if it doesn't feel right.

:) After all you never know whats around the corner.

Re: When did u know?
 

I have been here in Perth for only 2 weeks & am feeling exactly the same - we felt "OMG what have we done" as soon as we left the UK. Lots of people have been trying to tell us to give at least 6 mths but I am not sure that I want to feel this way for that amount of time & then still come to the same conclusion. I know that if we return now we can slot back into life in the UK -hubbie has been offered his job back & we would make enough to cover shipping the stuff back (due to drop in exchange rate) - container still at freemantle (not gone through customs yet) and is on hold while we comtemplate what we are doing!! I miss home & although I love the climate/lifestyle/big houses & relaxed atmosphere - I don't think it is for us now we have arrived.

It is comforting to see that some of the people I recognise on here are feeling the same & we are not from another planet!!

Thought I was the exception!

pockygoes

Re: When did u know?
 

I read all the advice on the Oz forum you've got since posting about hanging in there and it up to you which bits of the advice you take on.

But if you want to go home, go home!

Just see it as a learning experience...and try not to beat yourself up too much. Otherwise, you will go home and spend your time thinking "I wish I'd stuck it out!"

You will see from here that lots of people go home and see it as a positive experience enabling them to get more out of living in the UK. Others just want to go back.....

It doesn't matter what others think, it's how you want your life to be. Imagine your perfect day in your head....if it involves sun, BBQs and beaches (or whatever made you emigrate in the 1st place), hang in there, if it is friends, family, UK job etc, go home.

Re: When did u know?
 

Thanks for that - I think that hubbie & I are feeling stronger each day in our conviction & it will be such a weight off our shoulders when we book those tickets home - at least we are fortunate - I have noticed that so many on here - go back with nothing & have to struggle. We were worried when we thought about peoples reaction when we go back (after leaving parties etc) - but we will just say - we did it - it wasn't for us!!! we came back while we could afford to - sometimes it is not for all and you need to follow your gut feelings! I will still be able to visit for a holiday & that will be enough for me - at least I will be able to do that - travel some more & then go home!

pockygoes

Re: When did u know?
 

Hi Pockygoes,

I also knew in a very short time that Oz wasn't for me, we stayed 6 months for various reasons and all I can say is I counted every single day, I still have the calendar with the days marked of just as a reminder. We also decided to come back sooner rather than later and really have slotted back into life as if we have never been away. People were so glad to see us back, and when I offered our going away present back to my sister (it was an expensive gift) she said oh no I want you to think of it as a welcome home present. Just go with your gut instincts thats what i did and we have never looked back.

Susan :D

Re: When did u know?
 

I'm curious - what is that is so terrible you should want to go back within 2 weeks? That seems like such a short time.

I agree with people who say go with your heart, etc. As one who intends to head back in summer 2006 (I've been gone since 1983, except a year in Scotland in 2000), I really can identify with the "imagine a really good day" advice. For me, that "really good day" involves things I can do in the UK, not here. But two weeks seems like so short a time I'm not sure you can really know whether you'd adapt and like it or not.

I know that some people have stuck it out and after 6 months, a year, etc. were still feeling the same and so they went back. But I've also seen posts elsewhere from people who hated Australia/US/NZ when they first got there but it ended up being temporary homesickness and they settled for quite some time.

Of course, you are the only one who can make the decision. I just wanted to put another point of view.

Re: When did u know?
 

I agree, two weeks is no time at all. Your body probably hasnt got used to its new clock, let alone anything else.

When you decided to emigrate and go through the whole process there must have been good reasons why? Otherwise you wouldnt have spent all that time and money...

I guess it is each to their own, and good luck no matter what you decide, but I know there's no way I'd be coming home after just a couple of weeks!

Re: When did u know?
 

Have a read of the thread by pockygoes on the Oz forum. People did a really good job of saying hang in there but I think pockygoes is relieved to hear people have also gone home!

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Hi There,

I know exactly how you are feeling, and sometimes now matter how much you try it doesn't get easier.

Good luck with your plans and do what you feel is best. :)

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Homesickness takes a while to wear off, or become tolerable, but give it at least a year or so, no way can you possibly get the feel of a place in 2 weeks.
Take it from someone who is still feeling out of place in the UK after quite a few years, and I am British at that!
Take care, one day at a time!

Re: When did u know?
 

Pockygoes,

Alot of people will tell u to wait a while, forgetting the financial side of it! I know what you mean about being able to afford it if you go back soon.

I have been here 7 months now and I don't think Australia is for me in the long term. Unfortunately, hubbie loves it here and I think he would like to stay forever. We are giving it a year before deciding, and that is only to please him. Financially it is going to kill us, we will have to move into a smaller house when/if we go back to the uk. That's the hard thing for hubbie to accept as it all seems such a waste, we could be practically mortgage free here.

You are fortunate in that you both feel the same way, if so, what's stopping you? Do what is right for you and your husband. Either way, it is your decision, good luck in what you decide.

Mandy

Re: When did u know?
 

I think I already knew after a couple of days. Having no choice though, because I did not want to leave the love of my life I stayed for 3 years. I still feel like I felt after the first few days. Another 3 years to go and counting down but also trying to make the most of it.

Re: When did u know?
 

Darwinite,

Sorry for being nosy, but why have u got to stay another 3 years?

Curious Mandy :D

Re: When did u know?
 

Hi Pockygoes

just wondering is it possible to try out another area of OZ before deciding to come home?? or do you have to stay in Perth because husband is sponsered or something we stayed in a Perth suburb for 6 months i hated it and knew i couldnt live there but travelled around WA loved other areas and thought yes i could live here this feels right. We then went to Tasmania and loved it we have to go through STNI route so Tas is where we are trying to get to. We didnt manage to get to any other states so cant comment.

I know financally it may not be possible but Oz is such a big place it seems a shame to give up your dream so soon just think of the reasons you wanted to emigrate there in the first place.

Good luck in whatever you decide.

Kay :)

Re: When did u know?
 

From reading postings on this site, I would say that most husbands realized that Australia (or any other place) was not for them when thier wifes told them so.

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Would definitely try this PG. So many people in OZ have moved to a couple of places before finding where they really wanted to be. The cheap flights, mean even from Perth you could hop around to a couple of cities quite easily and quickly. Would be a shame not to see them even if you do go home!

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Did anyone feel like they were serving a sentence 'waiting' to get back on that plane to Heathrow?

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Oh yes!!!! :eek:

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[QUOTE=possoms]Hi Pockygoes

just wondering is it possible to try out another area of OZ before deciding to come home?? or do you have to stay in Perth because husband is sponsered or something we stayed in a Perth suburb for 6 months i hated it and knew i couldnt live there but travelled around WA loved other areas and thought yes i could live here this feels right. We then went to Tasmania and loved it we have to go through STNI route so Tas is where we are trying to get to. We didnt manage to get to any other states so cant comment.

I know financally it may not be possible but Oz is such a big place it seems a shame to give up your dream so soon just think of the reasons you wanted to emigrate there in the first place.

Good luck in whatever you decide.



Hi there Kay,

Could you please tell me what your plans are regarding making a life in TAS and what part etc you are looking to settle in. The reason I ask is that my Wife and I considered moving there for a few years (Hobart) recently but the dire employment situation and lack of IT related jobs made us reconsider the idea.

Thanks.

Re: When did u know?
 

[QUOTE=ahappychappy]Tasmania is a great place, the best scenery in OZ , Spectacular mountains, rivers, forests, unspoilt beautiful coast line, green countryside nice small rural towns. Cool climate , never gets too hot in summer but warm enough to go swimming and enjoy the fantastic beaches.
It has the lowest crime rate in Australia and is one of the least polluted places on earth with the cleanist air on earth. The only downside is the small population means limited employment opportunities.

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From reading the posts it seems the husbands want to stay in OZ but the wives don't.
Any explaination for this difference between the sexes.

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Yea,lots of great looking chicks.

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[QUOTE=ahappychappy]we are going STNI so there should be jobs as there is a shortage of skilled craftsmen ?? where we will live depends where the work is.

Kay

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Yes everytime I'm in the UK, can't wait to get to the nearest airport and back out again. Nice to catch up with family and friends but that wears off after awhile.

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Thats what I'm worried about! Have been back 8 weeks and I'm still loving it, but I'm realistic and know that I 'may' be begging DIMIA to let us back in again! I think it felt like a sentence as we'd booked the flights back and, after the decision to return, had to wait a month for the flight! It was long and tiresom filling the days. After we'd packed there wasn't much else to do but wait........and wait.............and wait!!!

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A lot of expats coming back to the uk from australia seem to me that there coming from perth I may be wrong but that what it looks like perhaps they should relocate in aus , as relocating in the uk probely still won't make them happy till there living back in there old slippers.

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Great unique employment opp for husband here, that's why.... I have seen every place in Australia and New Zealand twice thinking that a move within the area would solve everything. But came to the conclusion that as far as Downunder goes: here is as good (or bad) as anywhere else in Australia. Just my personal point of view. Though: one place I have not been to yet is Tassie. It's on my list. Once you have set yourself a date for when you go back to a life ;) it is actually ok here. :cool:
PS: I just had a cockrache crawl over my leg (argh). :eek: How is Tassie with regards to crawlers?

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Tassie is the best part of OZ in my opinion, well in terms of the scenery.
Regarding creepy crawlies probably less then the mainland because of the cooler climate.

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[QUOTE=pike]A lot of expats coming back to the uk from australia seem to me that there coming from perth I may be wrong but that what it looks like perhaps they should relocate in aus , as relocating in the uk probely still won't make them happy till there living back in there old slippers.[/QUOTE}

We are happy now we've moved back to the UK but I think you maybe right about Perth. We only had Adelaide to compare with (on our journey back to the UK via Adelaide) when we stayed there for a week. We found prices far cheaper for clothes and food. The city had far more choice, it was bigger and more 'happening'.

I think lots of people choose Perth because its the cheapest of the cities as far as house prices go, although even those are catching up with some states.

We didn't have the funds to try other cities but it wouldn't have changed our minds about returning to the UK. Australia is all pretty much the same. Its still thousands of miles from what we were use to, family and friends and a not so quiet lifestyle. We also saw Sydney and although it looks a lovely place you can't do much about living there if you haven't a good amount of money for a house.

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Im afraid Tas has the crawlers too along with the devils and the Tasmanian Tiger :D