Having a really shi**y day today and need to moan. So switch off now if you don't feel like being moaned at. Things have just reached a peak I s'pose. I will enlighten you;

1) Last week the car was broken into on the drive. They didn't take anything, just smashed the lock in. And we supposedly live in a nice area in a safe cul-de-sac

2) Hubby got a new job..yippee...what they didn't tell him was we would be absolutely broke for a month whilst they bugger about with his pay.

3) The iron blew up. Now my ironing pile is about 5ft high. Then again, I s'pose that's a good thing. Can't afford a new iron yet.

4) Things got a bit heated over the weeked with OH and I finally told him we are deffinately going back to the UK. All very tearful and draining but he's agreed it's the best thing for me and he will support me on that.

5) Yesterday I had to have one of our cats put to sleep as he was diagnosed with feline lukemia. Crikey, putting an ill cat to sleep is bad enough, but ordering one to be destroyed that is looking very healthy is heartbreaking. I haven't told the kids the truth. I've told them I found him a new home where he wouldn't be beaten up by my other cat.

6) Then last night, on the way home from school the steering on the car decided to start making really awful grinding noises. It's going to the mechanic tonight. God knows how much that's going to cost.

7) Finally, last but not least, I am so homesick at the moment it's ridiculous. Every minute of every day is spent thinking about home. I can't seem to function without something about home popping into my head.

Mods, please don't put this into the barbi. I couldn't hack any grief from some people in there.

I'm just so sad at the moment.

Ok moan over. You can wake up now.

Aw, I really feel for you. I remember well what homesickness was like and the tears that I shed. It seems like your having a run of bad look too but because you feel so crap you are dwelling on everything. I mean cars break, cats get ill wherever you are but when you feel low then the whole world seems to want to kick your butt

All I can say is try not to look to far forward, just a day at a time. Be kind to your self and try not to beat yourself up about the way that you feel.

How do you feel now that OH say it's ok and that you can return? Has it made you feel any different?

Sending lots of hugs

Mandy

Big hug, because I don't lile to see anyone so unhappy ((((((((hug)))))))))))

Thanks Mandy. OH still doesn't want to go home but bless him, he's sick of seeing me so down.

Mandy, can i just ask, if you remember so well how homesickness feels, why would you come back and do it all again? This isn't a dig in any way, I just wonder why you think you wouldn't feel the same this time around?

Thanks

Brings back memories - they say money doesn't bring happiness, but when you can't even afford a new iron and then the car packs up it's difficult to just laugh it off.

Each of those things by themselves would be bad enough but all on one day, sheesh. I hope things get better. Sounds like you have a sympathetic OH, what a blessing. I'm sure things will work out for you, just give it time.

Whoever said that about the money was obviously very rich.

We shouldn't be like this for Gods sake. We're not spring chickens, we should be established and getting to the 'comfortable' stage surely. Yet we seem to be struggling just the same as we were in the UK and we don't live extravagantly.

As for my OH; I am totally blessed. He is a wonderful man. I am so grateful for that. There are so many women I've either heard of, or know personally, that want to go home and get told "you go home on your own. I'm staying". Some selfish folk put a country before a marriage.

moan all you like, fortunately some people on here have broad shoulders and are great at listening and trying to help.

you sound like you need a big drink and an even bigger hug.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<hug>>>>>>>>>>>>>...

xx

Very sorry to hear about your run of bad luck.

Positive thought: at least you have now got your husband to agree to leaving. Hopefully, he will also develop a moderate hatred of his new job -- nothing too severe, as you don't want him miserable too, but just enough to make him look forward to a nice change of scenery

To be honest I don't really know myself. It's like having unfinished business if you like.

When you are going through what I would call 'peoplesickness' I couldn't see anything clearly. At times you become so miserable that you just want to go home and nothing anyone says will change your mind.

In a way, I had to come home for a couple of years to be able to see things more clearly and and now I can see some of the reasons why we didn't settle. I also had alot of other thing going on at the time (house not selling) so I thought maybe it wasn't to be.

Now, we did return and that did put a huge strain on our marriage cause it was hubbies dream I was trashing and the guilt of that was horrendeous at times. I'm glad to say we pulled through and are now even stronger. Be prepared for some rocky times ahead.

You need to be true to yourself and be honest with yourself about you reasons for returning. I only recently admitted to myself that it was because of the way I was feeling, my son fed of my negativity.

Coming back was lovely and we have settle back into life in the uk just fine. We could decide to stay and that will be fine but I just want to go back and tell australia, hey, thought you got rid of me that easily did you?

The only other way to describe it is that I don't want to be a victim of the emigration process, I want to fight for what we took so long to achieve.

Mandy

Trouble is Mandy, mine isn't just people sickness. I miss my Mum and in laws very much but I'm a realist. I know when we get back they will be getting on with their lives and will see us as and when. I'm not expecting daily or even weekly visits! But at least they will be within reach. That's not quite possible here.

My biggest problem is I miss England. For all it's grimness and problems, I miss it. I miss the countryside, the history and heritage, the diversity, the close proximity to europe, the shops, the seasons changing distinctly and not just bluring from one thing to nothing much of the other. I suppose I just miss my roots and all of the things that make me, well...me.

My plan is to go back, buy somewhere we can comfortably afford, therefore releasing financial pressures. Excess money from wages will be ours to play with. We will be able to travel so much more, and after feeling so trapped here, that will be fantastic. So the UK for us, will be our base. We will be able to travel back here to see friends too, if we want.

That's the plan. I hope it works that way.

Good luck to you Mandy, whatever you decide to do.

Have you got anyone who you can ring up or see who will make you laugh your head off?

When I went through a patch where I didn't think I would ever laugh again and hadn't done for a long time when I was in Oz and didn't know too many people were I was, and probably in many respects wasn't open to new friendships. I was invited out one night by a woman who did my nails to a party on one of the British ships that was in Port. I decided to go and met this guy, who made me laugh. In fact I spent the weekend with her and we saw these guys we had met over it, but both were a couple of comedians and for the first time in ages I howled with laughter the whole time. I have a lot to thank that guy for, as after that it snapped me out of how I had been feeling. It fact it obviously made a big difference as even my co worker commented on it that I seemed much brighter there after. It also made me want to go out and find new people.

Often when I got homesick or low, I rang the friend who I knew would make me laugh more than be sympathetic to my problems, and when I got off the phone I used to go to bed smiling. Laughter has helped me alot when the situation was getting to the point I thought I could scream.

Go out with your other half today, and do something really silly where you enjoy yourselves, forget about everything and just make each other laugh as you probably both need it, talk about things in the past that you both thought was funny or whatever. My OH is quite good at laughing sometimes when I'm stressed out and at first I get annoyed but the more he laughs about it, I start laughing too. Doesn't always work, but sometimes it does...

Big Hug from Spain anyway.....

I'm sorry to hear all that Tracey, I hope things get better for you soon. As someone pointed out, having your OH in agreement (albeit reluctantly) to go back is a huge thing, and be thankful for that at least.

Best wishes to you, chin up.

Oh Tracey you should have rung me and I would have come over with a bottle !!!! I've been hobbling round on my fractured toe all day!! that might have bought a smile to your face!!!

You should have told me about the cat

Poor old Graham is going through it all with me!!!

Big hugs see you later this week (ring if you wanna get into a drunken stuppor anytime this week: (promise I wont bring the fags)!!!

Well, get them to come around tonight for a bbq, get drunk together and have a good laugh, some fun. It might do you all some good.