HammockBound

Hi folks - glad you could drop by.

Firstly let me say thank you to everyone who has written such supportive posts on this forum. Reading it and seeing that I'm not alone has lifted my mood and really woken me up.

So...

I've been insanely lucky in my life. Shortly after finishing my first year of work after university, I inherited a house in England and was able to rent it out to allow me to travel the globe for prolonged periods without needing to work. Basically I've been travelling off and on for about 10 years now, the last three of which I've been based in Malaysia. I'd never felt an attachment to the UK and apart from my parents living there I can't really think of many reasons to pick this cold, wet island as my home.

But for some reason, for the last few months, I've felt desperately alone here and homesick for England. After a recent holiday to the UK which I enjoyed, I came very close to booking the flight and quitting this lazy drifter life for some stability and a stab at normalcy. But while I was evaluating my decision, I researched the costs and employment prospects of living in the UK with no recent qualifications or work experience and was ultimately put off by the overwhelmingly negative picture that was portrayed. It seemed my options were to (a) take very unchallenging lowly work and live in a cramped expensive property, or (b) stay in Malaysia and live what most people would call a very luxurious and easy life.

Now I've taken a 12 month rental in Malaysia and immediately regret it. Petty, trivial annoyances are driving me nuts and I'm turning disturbingly anti-social. I don't see a future here and I don't feel I can make it in the UK. And being unable to see a future anywhere is getting me very depressed. I'm really having a hard time getting out of bed in the mornings.

I can forfeit my deposit and return to the UK, but my doubts remain. There are great things about living in England aren't there? (i read too much BBC News which doesn't really sell the place).

I'd appreciate any advice - no matter how negative or severe. I'm still relatively young (31). How can I get back to life?

Thanks


HammockBound

Celtic Princess

It sounds to me like an age thing. Welcome to the club. Life seems to go on forever and time seems endless when one is in one's 20s. But suddenly, in one's 30s, reality sets in. You're halfway there and look how fast the first half went. Ooo eck! I'm 35 and find myself thinking things like 'what's the point in replacing the bathroom, I'll be dead soon'. Does anyone else feel this way or am I just off my trolly?

Regarding England, yes there are problems, you would be very hard pushed to find a country that doesn't have any. But it's also the centre of the known universe. Why is it so crowded and busy? Because every man and his dog wants to live there. We've been fighting them off for thousands of years and there is a reason for that. They can see the treasure that we, so often, take for granted.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJ2FOBxshWY

Irish Guinness

Great post C.P. SAD TO SAY MOST PEOPLE DO NOT APPRECIATE WHAT THEY HAVE IN THE U.K.and the media are the worst offends of all.

islandergirl

All so true Celtic Princess!

Seriously OP sounds like living the life of the last days of the Raj or whatever in a country where you have no real connections to people is starting to pall.

If you already own a house then does it matter that you won't be starting out on a high salary in the UK?

My first job out of uni I didn't make a fortune, maybe you should be comparing yourself to a graduate rather than peers who have put in the hard yards for 10 years.

Sounds like you are in a good position with no ties in Malaysia but if you still want an adventure you could always go and live somewhere new in the UK - just an idea.

Sue

HammockBound, just food for thought but whilst on your travels did you ever travel around the UK? If not perhaps you should treat the UK as another adventure and travel around it for a bit to see if moving back for good is what you really want.

Dave_Was

Definitely feel like this, I remember in my 20's everything was such an adventure and I didn't feel like I had any responsibilities and was immortal.

Now after some years, I'm beginning to realise life isn't forever and time is limited. I want to spend more time with my parents, friends and family. Also priorities change and I've seen that living to climb up that career ladder doesn't make me as happy as I thought it would.

I agree here. When I started out of university, just affording to live was all that mattered. Having a house would have been amazing. Think about it this way, at what age can most people say that they don't have a mortgage anymore? I'm guessing now it's into their 50's. You could always get the job you wanted, and supplement your income by renting out a room or two, but even if you didn't you don't have to worry about paying rent or a mortgage.

This is also a good idea. Why not travel around England and if you like it stop and if you don't keep moving.

Good Luck!

sans

Hi i notice that you named your thread finding away "HOME"........I'm not too clever with words, but maybe you have answered your own question their.

You may not of lived in the Uk for 10 yrs........but maybe deep down inside the UK has always been home. And where ever home is most of us return sooner or later if that makes any sense.........