A family seperated after move to Australia
Jul 26th 2008, 10:00 pm
#1
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Oct 2007
Location: B'ham-Melbourne-Sydney-B'ham
Posts: 104
A family seperated after move to Australia
Hi everyone
Have been back in the UK for 12 weeks now and have finally bought myself a new computer, it's nice to see some familiar names on here and to those of you who are new on here, I hope things are ok for you, wherever you are.
I thought I would share my experiences of moving and living in Australia now I have come out the other side, so to speak and also hoping it may help anyone else out there, must say it does seem rather surreal, sitting here in my home in the UK as last time I was on here, I was in Sydney, about to return home! I hope I don't offend anyone, these are my views and my opinions, so I'm just going to say how I feel, about what has been a very trying two years.
A bit of background! My OH, a Civil Engineer had always wanted to head to Australia to live, we have two children, now 2 and 4 and after much soul searching and a good job offer, he left for Melbourne in August 2006 and I followed in Sept 2006, our children then 2 and 11 months. The life we left behind was pretty good, a lovely home, great family support, kids settled and me giving up a place at Uni to head to Australia, for the 'adventure' and having been there before, for that 'once in a lifetime opportunity'. It seemed a fantastic idea, we were excited and pretty determined to make it work. having travelled alot prior to having children and always quite independent and happy go lucky' it's fair to say I completely underestimated the enourmity of the task ahead.
My OH settled almost immediately at work, left at 7am, back at 6pm, he joined the golf nights out, had lunch meetings and generally immersed himsly into work. I, on the other hand, after a few days only, in an apartment with two little ones and my mum (she had come to help) had a dreadful feeling of 'this doesn't feel right'. We found a house after 6 weeks of searching, I knew we would be in the aprtment for the children's birthdays, but the reality of it really hit home. My son turned 3 and my daughter 1 within days of arriving and I really struggled without my family and friends. I hated seeing my son upset and my daughter became quite ill and unsettled in herself. Still, I put on a brave face and we moved into our new home in Camberwell.
I found a kinder for my son, 2 days a week and set about finding my way round. There is no doubt that Melbourne really is a stunning city, I quite enjoyed heading into the city on the tram and walking down St Kilda beach and began to settle into what I think now, was holiday mode! My mum went home and the day to day routine of living in Melbourne hit home. Christmas soon came round before I had chance to secure any real friendships at the playgroups and if I'm honest I found the whole thing exhausting, I found the mum's quite friendly, but also quite closed, our home in the UK was quite often full of laughter and my children's friends, here it felt empty, almost sterile, I began to spend 13 hour days with the little ones during the summer hols in Jan 07 and I began to get quite depressed in myself. Quite a catch 22situation as I knew I had to get out there to meet people but felt so teary in myself too.
My OH was thriving and we started to argue, I knew I felt quite unwell in myslef, he thought I hadn't tried hard enough and with two little ones in the middle things got tough between us. At this point I decided to head home to the UK on my own with our children to see how I felt, I knew I my reaction to living in Australia had shocked me, I really did not like it at all, I felt like I was living in a bubble of blandness, a continual 'holiday' but one that well, there was no end in sight, no chance to get 'home' and to be glad to be home. I hated the fact that the kids had no real friends, our social circle had gone and my son was upset about Grandma, in a nutshell, I just wanted 'home' and started to have panic attacks every day. I came back to the UK Feb 2007 without my OH, he refused to come back.
Our tenants moved out of our home in the UK and I went home with our children, my family and friends rallied round nad gave us some items for the house and I felt relieved to be home, but devestated that it was without OH. He returned for a visit in April 2007 and against my better judgement, decided to give Australia another go, the kid's missed their dad desperately if I'm honest, I guess I felt I had to give it longer and wanted my family back together. I went back in May 2007, this time to Coburg in Melbourne and threw myself into everything again, gym creche, music time, kinder but by November of last year the familiar feelings resurfaced, OH was offered another job in Sydney and refused to go home. I gave it one last push in Sydney, in Blakehurst where I can honestly say, I became seriously homesick, extremely depressed and experienced some severe panic attacks, all whilst looking after my two children, alone all day in yet another huge isolating city. After several meetings with a therapist and seeing the effect it was having on our children, I came home. It saddens me greatly that unfortuneatly, my OH has chosen to stay in Australia and once again I had to come home alone.
We arrived back at Birmingham at 6.10pm on a Friday evening, my son elated and my daughter crying, after a 31 hour journey. I have not regretted my decision once and I will never go back to Australia. It's fair to say, there is not one single thing I miss about the place, I don't like having regrets, but I'm afraid I do regret going back, I do wish I had stuck with my initial reaction as I know now it was the right one and no amount of time would ever change that fact. I could go on and on about life for us in Australia, in a nutshell, (my OH has found everything he is and has been looking for all his life there) but I would rather look forward and tell you about the absolute contrast we have in our lives today, here back in the UK.
We are home. And it's beautiful, serene and peaceful. My garden at home is stunning, green, pinks, purples and the gorgeous smell of lavender. My neighbours talk to me, we stop outside in the light evenings and chat, they know my children's names and have known us for years. My home is mine, not some craphole for $800.00 a week with cockroaches for company and damp cupboards, my children are laughing in the garden and my son comes up to me and says 'thank you for bringing me home' or puts a thumbs up at dinner. It's rained and I love it, the colour has returned to my daughters cheeks and they have both stayed at Grandma's house whilst I had friends round with whom I have known for years. I have always loved flowers and our home is literally overflowing with them!! Oh, and they aren't wilting!
My son has just finished at Nursery, since we had been away, a new Children's Centre had been completed, all the staff the same, just a new building with state of the art equipment, this has been the highlight to being home, seeing my son happy, playing with his friends. He has started trampolining, football and swimming and my daughter is thriving. We no longer wander around hot parks or spend days upon days alone trying to make friends. We have been camping in beautiful Wales with my brother and his family, sat and looked out over the valley's with a £1.99 bbq whilst he plans where he is going to build his house on their plot of land. We have stayed at our friend's house and sat in the garden, just content to be there and had a great time at The Irish Centre for my cousin's birthday. The whole shopping experience is fantastic, lots of choice and value for money.
I feel like me again and I feel like a a great mom again. I would never had wanted my children to grow up in Australia, I do feel they have a much better life here. Things are obviously very painful still where my OH is concerned but he has to make his own choices in his life. I function much better here nad I know a happy mum means happy children. My son especially struggled with being in Australia, it broke my heart to see him so unhappy, missing his Grandpa and I feel a peace in my heart to know he is home and happy. I now see a homeopath who is superb to help me and my strength is returning from going to the gym and swimming to recover from whta has been a very difficult time. I know when I heard the song by U2 on the radio, 'It's a beautiful day, don't let it get away' that I belong at home in the UK.
I wish anyone that is heading to Australia all the best as afterall these are only our experiences and I would like to think that the only and best advice I can offer is if you go as a family, make sure you decide that if it doesn't work for everyone there in the family unit, then it hasn't worked, a Country really isn't worth splitting up over. I felt I couldn't stay there but my OH felt he couldn't live here in the UK, it's very sad. Anyone who wants to get 'home' I hope it is soon for you.
Take care and keep smiling, axx
Have been back in the UK for 12 weeks now and have finally bought myself a new computer, it's nice to see some familiar names on here and to those of you who are new on here, I hope things are ok for you, wherever you are.
I thought I would share my experiences of moving and living in Australia now I have come out the other side, so to speak and also hoping it may help anyone else out there, must say it does seem rather surreal, sitting here in my home in the UK as last time I was on here, I was in Sydney, about to return home! I hope I don't offend anyone, these are my views and my opinions, so I'm just going to say how I feel, about what has been a very trying two years.
A bit of background! My OH, a Civil Engineer had always wanted to head to Australia to live, we have two children, now 2 and 4 and after much soul searching and a good job offer, he left for Melbourne in August 2006 and I followed in Sept 2006, our children then 2 and 11 months. The life we left behind was pretty good, a lovely home, great family support, kids settled and me giving up a place at Uni to head to Australia, for the 'adventure' and having been there before, for that 'once in a lifetime opportunity'. It seemed a fantastic idea, we were excited and pretty determined to make it work. having travelled alot prior to having children and always quite independent and happy go lucky' it's fair to say I completely underestimated the enourmity of the task ahead.
My OH settled almost immediately at work, left at 7am, back at 6pm, he joined the golf nights out, had lunch meetings and generally immersed himsly into work. I, on the other hand, after a few days only, in an apartment with two little ones and my mum (she had come to help) had a dreadful feeling of 'this doesn't feel right'. We found a house after 6 weeks of searching, I knew we would be in the aprtment for the children's birthdays, but the reality of it really hit home. My son turned 3 and my daughter 1 within days of arriving and I really struggled without my family and friends. I hated seeing my son upset and my daughter became quite ill and unsettled in herself. Still, I put on a brave face and we moved into our new home in Camberwell.
I found a kinder for my son, 2 days a week and set about finding my way round. There is no doubt that Melbourne really is a stunning city, I quite enjoyed heading into the city on the tram and walking down St Kilda beach and began to settle into what I think now, was holiday mode! My mum went home and the day to day routine of living in Melbourne hit home. Christmas soon came round before I had chance to secure any real friendships at the playgroups and if I'm honest I found the whole thing exhausting, I found the mum's quite friendly, but also quite closed, our home in the UK was quite often full of laughter and my children's friends, here it felt empty, almost sterile, I began to spend 13 hour days with the little ones during the summer hols in Jan 07 and I began to get quite depressed in myself. Quite a catch 22situation as I knew I had to get out there to meet people but felt so teary in myself too.
My OH was thriving and we started to argue, I knew I felt quite unwell in myslef, he thought I hadn't tried hard enough and with two little ones in the middle things got tough between us. At this point I decided to head home to the UK on my own with our children to see how I felt, I knew I my reaction to living in Australia had shocked me, I really did not like it at all, I felt like I was living in a bubble of blandness, a continual 'holiday' but one that well, there was no end in sight, no chance to get 'home' and to be glad to be home. I hated the fact that the kids had no real friends, our social circle had gone and my son was upset about Grandma, in a nutshell, I just wanted 'home' and started to have panic attacks every day. I came back to the UK Feb 2007 without my OH, he refused to come back.
Our tenants moved out of our home in the UK and I went home with our children, my family and friends rallied round nad gave us some items for the house and I felt relieved to be home, but devestated that it was without OH. He returned for a visit in April 2007 and against my better judgement, decided to give Australia another go, the kid's missed their dad desperately if I'm honest, I guess I felt I had to give it longer and wanted my family back together. I went back in May 2007, this time to Coburg in Melbourne and threw myself into everything again, gym creche, music time, kinder but by November of last year the familiar feelings resurfaced, OH was offered another job in Sydney and refused to go home. I gave it one last push in Sydney, in Blakehurst where I can honestly say, I became seriously homesick, extremely depressed and experienced some severe panic attacks, all whilst looking after my two children, alone all day in yet another huge isolating city. After several meetings with a therapist and seeing the effect it was having on our children, I came home. It saddens me greatly that unfortuneatly, my OH has chosen to stay in Australia and once again I had to come home alone.
We arrived back at Birmingham at 6.10pm on a Friday evening, my son elated and my daughter crying, after a 31 hour journey. I have not regretted my decision once and I will never go back to Australia. It's fair to say, there is not one single thing I miss about the place, I don't like having regrets, but I'm afraid I do regret going back, I do wish I had stuck with my initial reaction as I know now it was the right one and no amount of time would ever change that fact. I could go on and on about life for us in Australia, in a nutshell, (my OH has found everything he is and has been looking for all his life there) but I would rather look forward and tell you about the absolute contrast we have in our lives today, here back in the UK.
We are home. And it's beautiful, serene and peaceful. My garden at home is stunning, green, pinks, purples and the gorgeous smell of lavender. My neighbours talk to me, we stop outside in the light evenings and chat, they know my children's names and have known us for years. My home is mine, not some craphole for $800.00 a week with cockroaches for company and damp cupboards, my children are laughing in the garden and my son comes up to me and says 'thank you for bringing me home' or puts a thumbs up at dinner. It's rained and I love it, the colour has returned to my daughters cheeks and they have both stayed at Grandma's house whilst I had friends round with whom I have known for years. I have always loved flowers and our home is literally overflowing with them!! Oh, and they aren't wilting!
My son has just finished at Nursery, since we had been away, a new Children's Centre had been completed, all the staff the same, just a new building with state of the art equipment, this has been the highlight to being home, seeing my son happy, playing with his friends. He has started trampolining, football and swimming and my daughter is thriving. We no longer wander around hot parks or spend days upon days alone trying to make friends. We have been camping in beautiful Wales with my brother and his family, sat and looked out over the valley's with a £1.99 bbq whilst he plans where he is going to build his house on their plot of land. We have stayed at our friend's house and sat in the garden, just content to be there and had a great time at The Irish Centre for my cousin's birthday. The whole shopping experience is fantastic, lots of choice and value for money.
I feel like me again and I feel like a a great mom again. I would never had wanted my children to grow up in Australia, I do feel they have a much better life here. Things are obviously very painful still where my OH is concerned but he has to make his own choices in his life. I function much better here nad I know a happy mum means happy children. My son especially struggled with being in Australia, it broke my heart to see him so unhappy, missing his Grandpa and I feel a peace in my heart to know he is home and happy. I now see a homeopath who is superb to help me and my strength is returning from going to the gym and swimming to recover from whta has been a very difficult time. I know when I heard the song by U2 on the radio, 'It's a beautiful day, don't let it get away' that I belong at home in the UK.
I wish anyone that is heading to Australia all the best as afterall these are only our experiences and I would like to think that the only and best advice I can offer is if you go as a family, make sure you decide that if it doesn't work for everyone there in the family unit, then it hasn't worked, a Country really isn't worth splitting up over. I felt I couldn't stay there but my OH felt he couldn't live here in the UK, it's very sad. Anyone who wants to get 'home' I hope it is soon for you.
Take care and keep smiling, axx
Jul 26th 2008, 11:30 pm
#2
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Apr 2007
Location: Saddleworth
Posts: 612
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
I am so glad things have worked out for you back home and you are now feeling more normal. Its very sad that a country has divided your family. I think many of us underestimate the enourmity of emigrating I certainly did and like you consider myself fairly well travelled and wasn't that close to my family, or so I thought!!!! Like you I knew fairly soon after arriving that it wasnt for me then when I started work that sealed it. 
We arrive back home 3 weeks today and every day feels like a year I cant wait to be back in our little house with all the different coloured flowers and the many greens of the countryside.
I wish you lots of luck for the future its hard work being a single mum but sounds like you have lots of good support networks around you. Sending you some well deserved Karma
We arrive back home 3 weeks today and every day feels like a year I cant wait to be back in our little house with all the different coloured flowers and the many greens of the countryside.
I wish you lots of luck for the future its hard work being a single mum but sounds like you have lots of good support networks around you. Sending you some well deserved Karma
Jul 26th 2008, 11:53 pm
#3
poole ,dorset . love it
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,281
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
Hi everyone
Have been back in the UK for 12 weeks now and have finally bought myself a new computer, it's nice to see some familiar names on here and to those of you who are new on here, I hope things are ok for you, wherever you are.
I thought I would share my experiences of moving and living in Australia now I have come out the other side, so to speak and also hoping it may help anyone else out there, must say it does seem rather surreal, sitting here in my home in the UK as last time I was on here, I was in Sydney, about to return home! I hope I don't offend anyone, these are my views and my opinions, so I'm just going to say how I feel, about what has been a very trying two years.
A bit of background! My OH, a Civil Engineer had always wanted to head to Australia to live, we have two children, now 2 and 4 and after much soul searching and a good job offer, he left for Melbourne in August 2006 and I followed in Sept 2006, our children then 2 and 11 months. The life we left behind was pretty good, a lovely home, great family support, kids settled and me giving up a place at Uni to head to Australia, for the 'adventure' and having been there before, for that 'once in a lifetime opportunity'. It seemed a fantastic idea, we were excited and pretty determined to make it work. having travelled alot prior to having children and always quite independent and happy go lucky' it's fair to say I completely underestimated the enourmity of the task ahead.
My OH settled almost immediately at work, left at 7am, back at 6pm, he joined the golf nights out, had lunch meetings and generally immersed himsly into work. I, on the other hand, after a few days only, in an apartment with two little ones and my mum (she had come to help) had a dreadful feeling of 'this doesn't feel right'. We found a house after 6 weeks of searching, I knew we would be in the aprtment for the children's birthdays, but the reality of it really hit home. My son turned 3 and my daughter 1 within days of arriving and I really struggled without my family and friends. I hated seeing my son upset and my daughter became quite ill and unsettled in herself. Still, I put on a brave face and we moved into our new home in Camberwell.
I found a kinder for my son, 2 days a week and set about finding my way round. There is no doubt that Melbourne really is a stunning city, I quite enjoyed heading into the city on the tram and walking down St Kilda beach and began to settle into what I think now, was holiday mode! My mum went home and the day to day routine of living in Melbourne hit home. Christmas soon came round before I had chance to secure any real friendships at the playgroups and if I'm honest I found the whole thing exhausting, I found the mum's quite friendly, but also quite closed, our home in the UK was quite often full of laughter and my children's friends, here it felt empty, almost sterile, I began to spend 13 hour days with the little ones during the summer hols in Jan 07 and I began to get quite depressed in myself. Quite a catch 22situation as I knew I had to get out there to meet people but felt so teary in myself too.
My OH was thriving and we started to argue, I knew I felt quite unwell in myslef, he thought I hadn't tried hard enough and with two little ones in the middle things got tough between us. At this point I decided to head home to the UK on my own with our children to see how I felt, I knew I my reaction to living in Australia had shocked me, I really did not like it at all, I felt like I was living in a bubble of blandness, a continual 'holiday' but one that well, there was no end in sight, no chance to get 'home' and to be glad to be home. I hated the fact that the kids had no real friends, our social circle had gone and my son was upset about Grandma, in a nutshell, I just wanted 'home' and started to have panic attacks every day. I came back to the UK Feb 2007 without my OH, he refused to come back.
Our tenants moved out of our home in the UK and I went home with our children, my family and friends rallied round nad gave us some items for the house and I felt relieved to be home, but devestated that it was without OH. He returned for a visit in April 2007 and against my better judgement, decided to give Australia another go, the kid's missed their dad desperately if I'm honest, I guess I felt I had to give it longer and wanted my family back together. I went back in May 2007, this time to Coburg in Melbourne and threw myself into everything again, gym creche, music time, kinder but by November of last year the familiar feelings resurfaced, OH was offered another job in Sydney and refused to go home. I gave it one last push in Sydney, in Blakehurst where I can honestly say, I became seriously homesick, extremely depressed and experienced some severe panic attacks, all whilst looking after my two children, alone all day in yet another huge isolating city. After several meetings with a therapist and seeing the effect it was having on our children, I came home. It saddens me greatly that unfortuneatly, my OH has chosen to stay in Australia and once again I had to come home alone.
We arrived back at Birmingham at 6.10pm on a Friday evening, my son elated and my daughter crying, after a 31 hour journey. I have not regretted my decision once and I will never go back to Australia. It's fair to say, there is not one single thing I miss about the place, I don't like having regrets, but I'm afraid I do regret going back, I do wish I had stuck with my initial reaction as I know now it was the right one and no amount of time would ever change that fact. I could go on and on about life for us in Australia, in a nutshell, (my OH has found everything he is and has been looking for all his life there) but I would rather look forward and tell you about the absolute contrast we have in our lives today, here back in the UK.
We are home. And it's beautiful, serene and peaceful. My garden at home is stunning, green, pinks, purples and the gorgeous smell of lavender. My neighbours talk to me, we stop outside in the light evenings and chat, they know my children's names and have known us for years. My home is mine, not some craphole for $800.00 a week with cockroaches for company and damp cupboards, my children are laughing in the garden and my son comes up to me and says 'thank you for bringing me home' or puts a thumbs up at dinner. It's rained and I love it, the colour has returned to my daughters cheeks and they have both stayed at Grandma's house whilst I had friends round with whom I have known for years. I have always loved flowers and our home is literally overflowing with them!! Oh, and they aren't wilting!
My son has just finished at Nursery, since we had been away, a new Children's Centre had been completed, all the staff the same, just a new building with state of the art equipment, this has been the highlight to being home, seeing my son happy, playing with his friends. He has started trampolining, football and swimming and my daughter is thriving. We no longer wander around hot parks or spend days upon days alone trying to make friends. We have been camping in beautiful Wales with my brother and his family, sat and looked out over the valley's with a £1.99 bbq whilst he plans where he is going to build his house on their plot of land. We have stayed at our friend's house and sat in the garden, just content to be there and had a great time at The Irish Centre for my cousin's birthday. The whole shopping experience is fantastic, lots of choice and value for money.
I feel like me again and I feel like a a great mom again. I would never had wanted my children to grow up in Australia, I do feel they have a much better life here. Things are obviously very painful still where my OH is concerned but he has to make his own choices in his life. I function much better here nad I know a happy mum means happy children. My son especially struggled with being in Australia, it broke my heart to see him so unhappy, missing his Grandpa and I feel a peace in my heart to know he is home and happy. I now see a homeopath who is superb to help me and my strength is returning from going to the gym and swimming to recover from whta has been a very difficult time. I know when I heard the song by U2 on the radio, 'It's a beautiful day, don't let it get away' that I belong at home in the UK.
I wish anyone that is heading to Australia all the best as afterall these are only our experiences and I would like to think that the only and best advice I can offer is if you go as a family, make sure you decide that if it doesn't work for everyone there in the family unit, then it hasn't worked, a Country really isn't worth splitting up over. I felt I couldn't stay there but my OH felt he couldn't live here in the UK, it's very sad. Anyone who wants to get 'home' I hope it is soon for you.
Take care and keep smiling, axx
Have been back in the UK for 12 weeks now and have finally bought myself a new computer, it's nice to see some familiar names on here and to those of you who are new on here, I hope things are ok for you, wherever you are.
I thought I would share my experiences of moving and living in Australia now I have come out the other side, so to speak and also hoping it may help anyone else out there, must say it does seem rather surreal, sitting here in my home in the UK as last time I was on here, I was in Sydney, about to return home! I hope I don't offend anyone, these are my views and my opinions, so I'm just going to say how I feel, about what has been a very trying two years.
A bit of background! My OH, a Civil Engineer had always wanted to head to Australia to live, we have two children, now 2 and 4 and after much soul searching and a good job offer, he left for Melbourne in August 2006 and I followed in Sept 2006, our children then 2 and 11 months. The life we left behind was pretty good, a lovely home, great family support, kids settled and me giving up a place at Uni to head to Australia, for the 'adventure' and having been there before, for that 'once in a lifetime opportunity'. It seemed a fantastic idea, we were excited and pretty determined to make it work. having travelled alot prior to having children and always quite independent and happy go lucky' it's fair to say I completely underestimated the enourmity of the task ahead.
My OH settled almost immediately at work, left at 7am, back at 6pm, he joined the golf nights out, had lunch meetings and generally immersed himsly into work. I, on the other hand, after a few days only, in an apartment with two little ones and my mum (she had come to help) had a dreadful feeling of 'this doesn't feel right'. We found a house after 6 weeks of searching, I knew we would be in the aprtment for the children's birthdays, but the reality of it really hit home. My son turned 3 and my daughter 1 within days of arriving and I really struggled without my family and friends. I hated seeing my son upset and my daughter became quite ill and unsettled in herself. Still, I put on a brave face and we moved into our new home in Camberwell.
I found a kinder for my son, 2 days a week and set about finding my way round. There is no doubt that Melbourne really is a stunning city, I quite enjoyed heading into the city on the tram and walking down St Kilda beach and began to settle into what I think now, was holiday mode! My mum went home and the day to day routine of living in Melbourne hit home. Christmas soon came round before I had chance to secure any real friendships at the playgroups and if I'm honest I found the whole thing exhausting, I found the mum's quite friendly, but also quite closed, our home in the UK was quite often full of laughter and my children's friends, here it felt empty, almost sterile, I began to spend 13 hour days with the little ones during the summer hols in Jan 07 and I began to get quite depressed in myself. Quite a catch 22situation as I knew I had to get out there to meet people but felt so teary in myself too.
My OH was thriving and we started to argue, I knew I felt quite unwell in myslef, he thought I hadn't tried hard enough and with two little ones in the middle things got tough between us. At this point I decided to head home to the UK on my own with our children to see how I felt, I knew I my reaction to living in Australia had shocked me, I really did not like it at all, I felt like I was living in a bubble of blandness, a continual 'holiday' but one that well, there was no end in sight, no chance to get 'home' and to be glad to be home. I hated the fact that the kids had no real friends, our social circle had gone and my son was upset about Grandma, in a nutshell, I just wanted 'home' and started to have panic attacks every day. I came back to the UK Feb 2007 without my OH, he refused to come back.
Our tenants moved out of our home in the UK and I went home with our children, my family and friends rallied round nad gave us some items for the house and I felt relieved to be home, but devestated that it was without OH. He returned for a visit in April 2007 and against my better judgement, decided to give Australia another go, the kid's missed their dad desperately if I'm honest, I guess I felt I had to give it longer and wanted my family back together. I went back in May 2007, this time to Coburg in Melbourne and threw myself into everything again, gym creche, music time, kinder but by November of last year the familiar feelings resurfaced, OH was offered another job in Sydney and refused to go home. I gave it one last push in Sydney, in Blakehurst where I can honestly say, I became seriously homesick, extremely depressed and experienced some severe panic attacks, all whilst looking after my two children, alone all day in yet another huge isolating city. After several meetings with a therapist and seeing the effect it was having on our children, I came home. It saddens me greatly that unfortuneatly, my OH has chosen to stay in Australia and once again I had to come home alone.
We arrived back at Birmingham at 6.10pm on a Friday evening, my son elated and my daughter crying, after a 31 hour journey. I have not regretted my decision once and I will never go back to Australia. It's fair to say, there is not one single thing I miss about the place, I don't like having regrets, but I'm afraid I do regret going back, I do wish I had stuck with my initial reaction as I know now it was the right one and no amount of time would ever change that fact. I could go on and on about life for us in Australia, in a nutshell, (my OH has found everything he is and has been looking for all his life there) but I would rather look forward and tell you about the absolute contrast we have in our lives today, here back in the UK.
We are home. And it's beautiful, serene and peaceful. My garden at home is stunning, green, pinks, purples and the gorgeous smell of lavender. My neighbours talk to me, we stop outside in the light evenings and chat, they know my children's names and have known us for years. My home is mine, not some craphole for $800.00 a week with cockroaches for company and damp cupboards, my children are laughing in the garden and my son comes up to me and says 'thank you for bringing me home' or puts a thumbs up at dinner. It's rained and I love it, the colour has returned to my daughters cheeks and they have both stayed at Grandma's house whilst I had friends round with whom I have known for years. I have always loved flowers and our home is literally overflowing with them!! Oh, and they aren't wilting!
My son has just finished at Nursery, since we had been away, a new Children's Centre had been completed, all the staff the same, just a new building with state of the art equipment, this has been the highlight to being home, seeing my son happy, playing with his friends. He has started trampolining, football and swimming and my daughter is thriving. We no longer wander around hot parks or spend days upon days alone trying to make friends. We have been camping in beautiful Wales with my brother and his family, sat and looked out over the valley's with a £1.99 bbq whilst he plans where he is going to build his house on their plot of land. We have stayed at our friend's house and sat in the garden, just content to be there and had a great time at The Irish Centre for my cousin's birthday. The whole shopping experience is fantastic, lots of choice and value for money.
I feel like me again and I feel like a a great mom again. I would never had wanted my children to grow up in Australia, I do feel they have a much better life here. Things are obviously very painful still where my OH is concerned but he has to make his own choices in his life. I function much better here nad I know a happy mum means happy children. My son especially struggled with being in Australia, it broke my heart to see him so unhappy, missing his Grandpa and I feel a peace in my heart to know he is home and happy. I now see a homeopath who is superb to help me and my strength is returning from going to the gym and swimming to recover from whta has been a very difficult time. I know when I heard the song by U2 on the radio, 'It's a beautiful day, don't let it get away' that I belong at home in the UK.
I wish anyone that is heading to Australia all the best as afterall these are only our experiences and I would like to think that the only and best advice I can offer is if you go as a family, make sure you decide that if it doesn't work for everyone there in the family unit, then it hasn't worked, a Country really isn't worth splitting up over. I felt I couldn't stay there but my OH felt he couldn't live here in the UK, it's very sad. Anyone who wants to get 'home' I hope it is soon for you.
Take care and keep smiling, axx
Jul 27th 2008, 12:38 am
#4
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,610
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
I think your very brave. You did the correct thing. You have to live life for yourself because when you do that those around you can sense your mood and they will be happy. I am sorry about your OH but if he loves you and misses you he will come home if not you are young and you can heal and get on with your life. You did try. Twice I think you gave it everything you had. your OH should have realized that.
I wish years ago when I was first in the US and was most unhappy that I would have had the courage to do what you did. You see you can get on with your life with no regrets many of us who stay either because we are 'trapped' or scared live to regret it and regret can last many years.
Goodluck to you.
I wish years ago when I was first in the US and was most unhappy that I would have had the courage to do what you did. You see you can get on with your life with no regrets many of us who stay either because we are 'trapped' or scared live to regret it and regret can last many years.
Goodluck to you.
Jul 27th 2008, 12:46 am
#5
Cynically amused.
Joined: Oct 2002
Location: BC
Posts: 3,648
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
Well done you. So glad that you were allowed to leave with the kids...!
Jul 27th 2008, 12:52 am
#6
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jun 2007
Location: South Island NZ
Posts: 527
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
Hi everyone
Have been back in the UK for 12 weeks now and have finally bought myself a new computer, it's nice to see some familiar names on here and to those of you who are new on here, I hope things are ok for you, wherever you are.
I thought I would share my experiences of moving and living in Australia now I have come out the other side, so to speak and also hoping it may help anyone else out there, must say it does seem rather surreal, sitting here in my home in the UK as last time I was on here, I was in Sydney, about to return home! I hope I don't offend anyone, these are my views and my opinions, so I'm just going to say how I feel, about what has been a very trying two years.
A bit of background! My OH, a Civil Engineer had always wanted to head to Australia to live, we have two children, now 2 and 4 and after much soul searching and a good job offer, he left for Melbourne in August 2006 and I followed in Sept 2006, our children then 2 and 11 months. The life we left behind was pretty good, a lovely home, great family support, kids settled and me giving up a place at Uni to head to Australia, for the 'adventure' and having been there before, for that 'once in a lifetime opportunity'. It seemed a fantastic idea, we were excited and pretty determined to make it work. having travelled alot prior to having children and always quite independent and happy go lucky' it's fair to say I completely underestimated the enourmity of the task ahead.
My OH settled almost immediately at work, left at 7am, back at 6pm, he joined the golf nights out, had lunch meetings and generally immersed himsly into work. I, on the other hand, after a few days only, in an apartment with two little ones and my mum (she had come to help) had a dreadful feeling of 'this doesn't feel right'. We found a house after 6 weeks of searching, I knew we would be in the aprtment for the children's birthdays, but the reality of it really hit home. My son turned 3 and my daughter 1 within days of arriving and I really struggled without my family and friends. I hated seeing my son upset and my daughter became quite ill and unsettled in herself. Still, I put on a brave face and we moved into our new home in Camberwell.
I found a kinder for my son, 2 days a week and set about finding my way round. There is no doubt that Melbourne really is a stunning city, I quite enjoyed heading into the city on the tram and walking down St Kilda beach and began to settle into what I think now, was holiday mode! My mum went home and the day to day routine of living in Melbourne hit home. Christmas soon came round before I had chance to secure any real friendships at the playgroups and if I'm honest I found the whole thing exhausting, I found the mum's quite friendly, but also quite closed, our home in the UK was quite often full of laughter and my children's friends, here it felt empty, almost sterile, I began to spend 13 hour days with the little ones during the summer hols in Jan 07 and I began to get quite depressed in myself. Quite a catch 22situation as I knew I had to get out there to meet people but felt so teary in myself too.
My OH was thriving and we started to argue, I knew I felt quite unwell in myslef, he thought I hadn't tried hard enough and with two little ones in the middle things got tough between us. At this point I decided to head home to the UK on my own with our children to see how I felt, I knew I my reaction to living in Australia had shocked me, I really did not like it at all, I felt like I was living in a bubble of blandness, a continual 'holiday' but one that well, there was no end in sight, no chance to get 'home' and to be glad to be home. I hated the fact that the kids had no real friends, our social circle had gone and my son was upset about Grandma, in a nutshell, I just wanted 'home' and started to have panic attacks every day. I came back to the UK Feb 2007 without my OH, he refused to come back.
Our tenants moved out of our home in the UK and I went home with our children, my family and friends rallied round nad gave us some items for the house and I felt relieved to be home, but devestated that it was without OH. He returned for a visit in April 2007 and against my better judgement, decided to give Australia another go, the kid's missed their dad desperately if I'm honest, I guess I felt I had to give it longer and wanted my family back together. I went back in May 2007, this time to Coburg in Melbourne and threw myself into everything again, gym creche, music time, kinder but by November of last year the familiar feelings resurfaced, OH was offered another job in Sydney and refused to go home. I gave it one last push in Sydney, in Blakehurst where I can honestly say, I became seriously homesick, extremely depressed and experienced some severe panic attacks, all whilst looking after my two children, alone all day in yet another huge isolating city. After several meetings with a therapist and seeing the effect it was having on our children, I came home. It saddens me greatly that unfortuneatly, my OH has chosen to stay in Australia and once again I had to come home alone.
We arrived back at Birmingham at 6.10pm on a Friday evening, my son elated and my daughter crying, after a 31 hour journey. I have not regretted my decision once and I will never go back to Australia. It's fair to say, there is not one single thing I miss about the place, I don't like having regrets, but I'm afraid I do regret going back, I do wish I had stuck with my initial reaction as I know now it was the right one and no amount of time would ever change that fact. I could go on and on about life for us in Australia, in a nutshell, (my OH has found everything he is and has been looking for all his life there) but I would rather look forward and tell you about the absolute contrast we have in our lives today, here back in the UK.
We are home. And it's beautiful, serene and peaceful. My garden at home is stunning, green, pinks, purples and the gorgeous smell of lavender. My neighbours talk to me, we stop outside in the light evenings and chat, they know my children's names and have known us for years. My home is mine, not some craphole for $800.00 a week with cockroaches for company and damp cupboards, my children are laughing in the garden and my son comes up to me and says 'thank you for bringing me home' or puts a thumbs up at dinner. It's rained and I love it, the colour has returned to my daughters cheeks and they have both stayed at Grandma's house whilst I had friends round with whom I have known for years. I have always loved flowers and our home is literally overflowing with them!! Oh, and they aren't wilting!
My son has just finished at Nursery, since we had been away, a new Children's Centre had been completed, all the staff the same, just a new building with state of the art equipment, this has been the highlight to being home, seeing my son happy, playing with his friends. He has started trampolining, football and swimming and my daughter is thriving. We no longer wander around hot parks or spend days upon days alone trying to make friends. We have been camping in beautiful Wales with my brother and his family, sat and looked out over the valley's with a £1.99 bbq whilst he plans where he is going to build his house on their plot of land. We have stayed at our friend's house and sat in the garden, just content to be there and had a great time at The Irish Centre for my cousin's birthday. The whole shopping experience is fantastic, lots of choice and value for money.
I feel like me again and I feel like a a great mom again. I would never had wanted my children to grow up in Australia, I do feel they have a much better life here. Things are obviously very painful still where my OH is concerned but he has to make his own choices in his life. I function much better here nad I know a happy mum means happy children. My son especially struggled with being in Australia, it broke my heart to see him so unhappy, missing his Grandpa and I feel a peace in my heart to know he is home and happy. I now see a homeopath who is superb to help me and my strength is returning from going to the gym and swimming to recover from whta has been a very difficult time. I know when I heard the song by U2 on the radio, 'It's a beautiful day, don't let it get away' that I belong at home in the UK.
I wish anyone that is heading to Australia all the best as afterall these are only our experiences and I would like to think that the only and best advice I can offer is if you go as a family, make sure you decide that if it doesn't work for everyone there in the family unit, then it hasn't worked, a Country really isn't worth splitting up over. I felt I couldn't stay there but my OH felt he couldn't live here in the UK, it's very sad. Anyone who wants to get 'home' I hope it is soon for you.
Take care and keep smiling, axx
Have been back in the UK for 12 weeks now and have finally bought myself a new computer, it's nice to see some familiar names on here and to those of you who are new on here, I hope things are ok for you, wherever you are.
I thought I would share my experiences of moving and living in Australia now I have come out the other side, so to speak and also hoping it may help anyone else out there, must say it does seem rather surreal, sitting here in my home in the UK as last time I was on here, I was in Sydney, about to return home! I hope I don't offend anyone, these are my views and my opinions, so I'm just going to say how I feel, about what has been a very trying two years.
A bit of background! My OH, a Civil Engineer had always wanted to head to Australia to live, we have two children, now 2 and 4 and after much soul searching and a good job offer, he left for Melbourne in August 2006 and I followed in Sept 2006, our children then 2 and 11 months. The life we left behind was pretty good, a lovely home, great family support, kids settled and me giving up a place at Uni to head to Australia, for the 'adventure' and having been there before, for that 'once in a lifetime opportunity'. It seemed a fantastic idea, we were excited and pretty determined to make it work. having travelled alot prior to having children and always quite independent and happy go lucky' it's fair to say I completely underestimated the enourmity of the task ahead.
My OH settled almost immediately at work, left at 7am, back at 6pm, he joined the golf nights out, had lunch meetings and generally immersed himsly into work. I, on the other hand, after a few days only, in an apartment with two little ones and my mum (she had come to help) had a dreadful feeling of 'this doesn't feel right'. We found a house after 6 weeks of searching, I knew we would be in the aprtment for the children's birthdays, but the reality of it really hit home. My son turned 3 and my daughter 1 within days of arriving and I really struggled without my family and friends. I hated seeing my son upset and my daughter became quite ill and unsettled in herself. Still, I put on a brave face and we moved into our new home in Camberwell.
I found a kinder for my son, 2 days a week and set about finding my way round. There is no doubt that Melbourne really is a stunning city, I quite enjoyed heading into the city on the tram and walking down St Kilda beach and began to settle into what I think now, was holiday mode! My mum went home and the day to day routine of living in Melbourne hit home. Christmas soon came round before I had chance to secure any real friendships at the playgroups and if I'm honest I found the whole thing exhausting, I found the mum's quite friendly, but also quite closed, our home in the UK was quite often full of laughter and my children's friends, here it felt empty, almost sterile, I began to spend 13 hour days with the little ones during the summer hols in Jan 07 and I began to get quite depressed in myself. Quite a catch 22situation as I knew I had to get out there to meet people but felt so teary in myself too.
My OH was thriving and we started to argue, I knew I felt quite unwell in myslef, he thought I hadn't tried hard enough and with two little ones in the middle things got tough between us. At this point I decided to head home to the UK on my own with our children to see how I felt, I knew I my reaction to living in Australia had shocked me, I really did not like it at all, I felt like I was living in a bubble of blandness, a continual 'holiday' but one that well, there was no end in sight, no chance to get 'home' and to be glad to be home. I hated the fact that the kids had no real friends, our social circle had gone and my son was upset about Grandma, in a nutshell, I just wanted 'home' and started to have panic attacks every day. I came back to the UK Feb 2007 without my OH, he refused to come back.
Our tenants moved out of our home in the UK and I went home with our children, my family and friends rallied round nad gave us some items for the house and I felt relieved to be home, but devestated that it was without OH. He returned for a visit in April 2007 and against my better judgement, decided to give Australia another go, the kid's missed their dad desperately if I'm honest, I guess I felt I had to give it longer and wanted my family back together. I went back in May 2007, this time to Coburg in Melbourne and threw myself into everything again, gym creche, music time, kinder but by November of last year the familiar feelings resurfaced, OH was offered another job in Sydney and refused to go home. I gave it one last push in Sydney, in Blakehurst where I can honestly say, I became seriously homesick, extremely depressed and experienced some severe panic attacks, all whilst looking after my two children, alone all day in yet another huge isolating city. After several meetings with a therapist and seeing the effect it was having on our children, I came home. It saddens me greatly that unfortuneatly, my OH has chosen to stay in Australia and once again I had to come home alone.
We arrived back at Birmingham at 6.10pm on a Friday evening, my son elated and my daughter crying, after a 31 hour journey. I have not regretted my decision once and I will never go back to Australia. It's fair to say, there is not one single thing I miss about the place, I don't like having regrets, but I'm afraid I do regret going back, I do wish I had stuck with my initial reaction as I know now it was the right one and no amount of time would ever change that fact. I could go on and on about life for us in Australia, in a nutshell, (my OH has found everything he is and has been looking for all his life there) but I would rather look forward and tell you about the absolute contrast we have in our lives today, here back in the UK.
We are home. And it's beautiful, serene and peaceful. My garden at home is stunning, green, pinks, purples and the gorgeous smell of lavender. My neighbours talk to me, we stop outside in the light evenings and chat, they know my children's names and have known us for years. My home is mine, not some craphole for $800.00 a week with cockroaches for company and damp cupboards, my children are laughing in the garden and my son comes up to me and says 'thank you for bringing me home' or puts a thumbs up at dinner. It's rained and I love it, the colour has returned to my daughters cheeks and they have both stayed at Grandma's house whilst I had friends round with whom I have known for years. I have always loved flowers and our home is literally overflowing with them!! Oh, and they aren't wilting!
My son has just finished at Nursery, since we had been away, a new Children's Centre had been completed, all the staff the same, just a new building with state of the art equipment, this has been the highlight to being home, seeing my son happy, playing with his friends. He has started trampolining, football and swimming and my daughter is thriving. We no longer wander around hot parks or spend days upon days alone trying to make friends. We have been camping in beautiful Wales with my brother and his family, sat and looked out over the valley's with a £1.99 bbq whilst he plans where he is going to build his house on their plot of land. We have stayed at our friend's house and sat in the garden, just content to be there and had a great time at The Irish Centre for my cousin's birthday. The whole shopping experience is fantastic, lots of choice and value for money.
I feel like me again and I feel like a a great mom again. I would never had wanted my children to grow up in Australia, I do feel they have a much better life here. Things are obviously very painful still where my OH is concerned but he has to make his own choices in his life. I function much better here nad I know a happy mum means happy children. My son especially struggled with being in Australia, it broke my heart to see him so unhappy, missing his Grandpa and I feel a peace in my heart to know he is home and happy. I now see a homeopath who is superb to help me and my strength is returning from going to the gym and swimming to recover from whta has been a very difficult time. I know when I heard the song by U2 on the radio, 'It's a beautiful day, don't let it get away' that I belong at home in the UK.
I wish anyone that is heading to Australia all the best as afterall these are only our experiences and I would like to think that the only and best advice I can offer is if you go as a family, make sure you decide that if it doesn't work for everyone there in the family unit, then it hasn't worked, a Country really isn't worth splitting up over. I felt I couldn't stay there but my OH felt he couldn't live here in the UK, it's very sad. Anyone who wants to get 'home' I hope it is soon for you.
Take care and keep smiling, axx
Was a great thing that you had your house to go back to eventually and as others have said you have tried your very best and to quote King Kong its best to get out sooner than later otherwise other complications then start to set in.
All the very best to you and your family!
Cheers
Cally
Jul 27th 2008, 1:20 am
#7
Account Closed
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 3,533
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
I am so pleased to hear that you've done what you knew in your heart was the right thing for you and your children. Your husband, if he wants to be a husband and father, will come back to you. If he doesn't, well, he obviously chooses a country over his family. Terrible shame.
I wish you continued success and happiness in everything that you do. You are one very strong lady, you should be proud of yourself.
I wish you continued success and happiness in everything that you do. You are one very strong lady, you should be proud of yourself.
Jul 27th 2008, 5:22 am
#8
Account Closed
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 0
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
Well done, for following what you knew in your heart was right.
I am sorry that the emotional cost has been so high, but at least you move forward from here.
I am fortunate that although my wife and daughter are now back in the UK, I know that by the end of the year, I will be with them, and not a day goes by without my heart feeling sad for the moments I am missing.
Good luck in the rest of your future, and may your newly discovered happiness remain with you.
Pete
I am sorry that the emotional cost has been so high, but at least you move forward from here.
I am fortunate that although my wife and daughter are now back in the UK, I know that by the end of the year, I will be with them, and not a day goes by without my heart feeling sad for the moments I am missing.
Good luck in the rest of your future, and may your newly discovered happiness remain with you.
Pete
Jul 27th 2008, 7:09 am
#9
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Sep 2007
Location: Canberra
Posts: 8,378
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
What a story, Happy! I am so glad that you have found the belonging that you needed - I can so relate! If it is what you want, I hope that your OH comes to his senses pretty smartish and works out that family is more important than place but who knows sometimes selfishness wins out. I think you have done just the right thing and wish you all the very best with it!
Jul 27th 2008, 7:30 am
#10
Account Closed
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 8,913
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
A happy ending to such a turbulant few years. I can't believe your husband has given up on his children and wife for Australia, maybe you are better off without him.
May your happiness continue in the place you belong.
May your happiness continue in the place you belong.
Jul 27th 2008, 6:10 pm
#11
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Oct 2007
Location: B'ham-Melbourne-Sydney-B'ham
Posts: 104
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
Hi everyone
Have been back in the UK for 12 weeks now and have finally bought myself a new computer, it's nice to see some familiar names on here and to those of you who are new on here, I hope things are ok for you, wherever you are.
I thought I would share my experiences of moving and living in Australia now I have come out the other side, so to speak and also hoping it may help anyone else out there, must say it does seem rather surreal, sitting here in my home in the UK as last time I was on here, I was in Sydney, about to return home! I hope I don't offend anyone, these are my views and my opinions, so I'm just going to say how I feel, about what has been a very trying two years.
A bit of background! My OH, a Civil Engineer had always wanted to head to Australia to live, we have two children, now 2 and 4 and after much soul searching and a good job offer, he left for Melbourne in August 2006 and I followed in Sept 2006, our children then 2 and 11 months. The life we left behind was pretty good, a lovely home, great family support, kids settled and me giving up a place at Uni to head to Australia, for the 'adventure' and having been there before, for that 'once in a lifetime opportunity'. It seemed a fantastic idea, we were excited and pretty determined to make it work. having travelled alot prior to having children and always quite independent and happy go lucky' it's fair to say I completely underestimated the enourmity of the task ahead.
My OH settled almost immediately at work, left at 7am, back at 6pm, he joined the golf nights out, had lunch meetings and generally immersed himsly into work. I, on the other hand, after a few days only, in an apartment with two little ones and my mum (she had come to help) had a dreadful feeling of 'this doesn't feel right'. We found a house after 6 weeks of searching, I knew we would be in the aprtment for the children's birthdays, but the reality of it really hit home. My son turned 3 and my daughter 1 within days of arriving and I really struggled without my family and friends. I hated seeing my son upset and my daughter became quite ill and unsettled in herself. Still, I put on a brave face and we moved into our new home in Camberwell.
I found a kinder for my son, 2 days a week and set about finding my way round. There is no doubt that Melbourne really is a stunning city, I quite enjoyed heading into the city on the tram and walking down St Kilda beach and began to settle into what I think now, was holiday mode! My mum went home and the day to day routine of living in Melbourne hit home. Christmas soon came round before I had chance to secure any real friendships at the playgroups and if I'm honest I found the whole thing exhausting, I found the mum's quite friendly, but also quite closed, our home in the UK was quite often full of laughter and my children's friends, here it felt empty, almost sterile, I began to spend 13 hour days with the little ones during the summer hols in Jan 07 and I began to get quite depressed in myself. Quite a catch 22situation as I knew I had to get out there to meet people but felt so teary in myself too.
My OH was thriving and we started to argue, I knew I felt quite unwell in myslef, he thought I hadn't tried hard enough and with two little ones in the middle things got tough between us. At this point I decided to head home to the UK on my own with our children to see how I felt, I knew I my reaction to living in Australia had shocked me, I really did not like it at all, I felt like I was living in a bubble of blandness, a continual 'holiday' but one that well, there was no end in sight, no chance to get 'home' and to be glad to be home. I hated the fact that the kids had no real friends, our social circle had gone and my son was upset about Grandma, in a nutshell, I just wanted 'home' and started to have panic attacks every day. I came back to the UK Feb 2007 without my OH, he refused to come back.
Our tenants moved out of our home in the UK and I went home with our children, my family and friends rallied round nad gave us some items for the house and I felt relieved to be home, but devestated that it was without OH. He returned for a visit in April 2007 and against my better judgement, decided to give Australia another go, the kid's missed their dad desperately if I'm honest, I guess I felt I had to give it longer and wanted my family back together. I went back in May 2007, this time to Coburg in Melbourne and threw myself into everything again, gym creche, music time, kinder but by November of last year the familiar feelings resurfaced, OH was offered another job in Sydney and refused to go home. I gave it one last push in Sydney, in Blakehurst where I can honestly say, I became seriously homesick, extremely depressed and experienced some severe panic attacks, all whilst looking after my two children, alone all day in yet another huge isolating city. After several meetings with a therapist and seeing the effect it was having on our children, I came home. It saddens me greatly that unfortuneatly, my OH has chosen to stay in Australia and once again I had to come home alone.
We arrived back at Birmingham at 6.10pm on a Friday evening, my son elated and my daughter crying, after a 31 hour journey. I have not regretted my decision once and I will never go back to Australia. It's fair to say, there is not one single thing I miss about the place, I don't like having regrets, but I'm afraid I do regret going back, I do wish I had stuck with my initial reaction as I know now it was the right one and no amount of time would ever change that fact. I could go on and on about life for us in Australia, in a nutshell, (my OH has found everything he is and has been looking for all his life there) but I would rather look forward and tell you about the absolute contrast we have in our lives today, here back in the UK.
We are home. And it's beautiful, serene and peaceful. My garden at home is stunning, green, pinks, purples and the gorgeous smell of lavender. My neighbours talk to me, we stop outside in the light evenings and chat, they know my children's names and have known us for years. My home is mine, not some craphole for $800.00 a week with cockroaches for company and damp cupboards, my children are laughing in the garden and my son comes up to me and says 'thank you for bringing me home' or puts a thumbs up at dinner. It's rained and I love it, the colour has returned to my daughters cheeks and they have both stayed at Grandma's house whilst I had friends round with whom I have known for years. I have always loved flowers and our home is literally overflowing with them!! Oh, and they aren't wilting!
My son has just finished at Nursery, since we had been away, a new Children's Centre had been completed, all the staff the same, just a new building with state of the art equipment, this has been the highlight to being home, seeing my son happy, playing with his friends. He has started trampolining, football and swimming and my daughter is thriving. We no longer wander around hot parks or spend days upon days alone trying to make friends. We have been camping in beautiful Wales with my brother and his family, sat and looked out over the valley's with a £1.99 bbq whilst he plans where he is going to build his house on their plot of land. We have stayed at our friend's house and sat in the garden, just content to be there and had a great time at The Irish Centre for my cousin's birthday. The whole shopping experience is fantastic, lots of choice and value for money.
I feel like me again and I feel like a a great mom again. I would never had wanted my children to grow up in Australia, I do feel they have a much better life here. Things are obviously very painful still where my OH is concerned but he has to make his own choices in his life. I function much better here nad I know a happy mum means happy children. My son especially struggled with being in Australia, it broke my heart to see him so unhappy, missing his Grandpa and I feel a peace in my heart to know he is home and happy. I now see a homeopath who is superb to help me and my strength is returning from going to the gym and swimming to recover from whta has been a very difficult time. I know when I heard the song by U2 on the radio, 'It's a beautiful day, don't let it get away' that I belong at home in the UK.
I wish anyone that is heading to Australia all the best as afterall these are only our experiences and I would like to think that the only and best advice I can offer is if you go as a family, make sure you decide that if it doesn't work for everyone there in the family unit, then it hasn't worked, a Country really isn't worth splitting up over. I felt I couldn't stay there but my OH felt he couldn't live here in the UK, it's very sad. Anyone who wants to get 'home' I hope it is soon for you.
Take care and keep smiling, axx
Have been back in the UK for 12 weeks now and have finally bought myself a new computer, it's nice to see some familiar names on here and to those of you who are new on here, I hope things are ok for you, wherever you are.
I thought I would share my experiences of moving and living in Australia now I have come out the other side, so to speak and also hoping it may help anyone else out there, must say it does seem rather surreal, sitting here in my home in the UK as last time I was on here, I was in Sydney, about to return home! I hope I don't offend anyone, these are my views and my opinions, so I'm just going to say how I feel, about what has been a very trying two years.
A bit of background! My OH, a Civil Engineer had always wanted to head to Australia to live, we have two children, now 2 and 4 and after much soul searching and a good job offer, he left for Melbourne in August 2006 and I followed in Sept 2006, our children then 2 and 11 months. The life we left behind was pretty good, a lovely home, great family support, kids settled and me giving up a place at Uni to head to Australia, for the 'adventure' and having been there before, for that 'once in a lifetime opportunity'. It seemed a fantastic idea, we were excited and pretty determined to make it work. having travelled alot prior to having children and always quite independent and happy go lucky' it's fair to say I completely underestimated the enourmity of the task ahead.
My OH settled almost immediately at work, left at 7am, back at 6pm, he joined the golf nights out, had lunch meetings and generally immersed himsly into work. I, on the other hand, after a few days only, in an apartment with two little ones and my mum (she had come to help) had a dreadful feeling of 'this doesn't feel right'. We found a house after 6 weeks of searching, I knew we would be in the aprtment for the children's birthdays, but the reality of it really hit home. My son turned 3 and my daughter 1 within days of arriving and I really struggled without my family and friends. I hated seeing my son upset and my daughter became quite ill and unsettled in herself. Still, I put on a brave face and we moved into our new home in Camberwell.
I found a kinder for my son, 2 days a week and set about finding my way round. There is no doubt that Melbourne really is a stunning city, I quite enjoyed heading into the city on the tram and walking down St Kilda beach and began to settle into what I think now, was holiday mode! My mum went home and the day to day routine of living in Melbourne hit home. Christmas soon came round before I had chance to secure any real friendships at the playgroups and if I'm honest I found the whole thing exhausting, I found the mum's quite friendly, but also quite closed, our home in the UK was quite often full of laughter and my children's friends, here it felt empty, almost sterile, I began to spend 13 hour days with the little ones during the summer hols in Jan 07 and I began to get quite depressed in myself. Quite a catch 22situation as I knew I had to get out there to meet people but felt so teary in myself too.
My OH was thriving and we started to argue, I knew I felt quite unwell in myslef, he thought I hadn't tried hard enough and with two little ones in the middle things got tough between us. At this point I decided to head home to the UK on my own with our children to see how I felt, I knew I my reaction to living in Australia had shocked me, I really did not like it at all, I felt like I was living in a bubble of blandness, a continual 'holiday' but one that well, there was no end in sight, no chance to get 'home' and to be glad to be home. I hated the fact that the kids had no real friends, our social circle had gone and my son was upset about Grandma, in a nutshell, I just wanted 'home' and started to have panic attacks every day. I came back to the UK Feb 2007 without my OH, he refused to come back.
Our tenants moved out of our home in the UK and I went home with our children, my family and friends rallied round nad gave us some items for the house and I felt relieved to be home, but devestated that it was without OH. He returned for a visit in April 2007 and against my better judgement, decided to give Australia another go, the kid's missed their dad desperately if I'm honest, I guess I felt I had to give it longer and wanted my family back together. I went back in May 2007, this time to Coburg in Melbourne and threw myself into everything again, gym creche, music time, kinder but by November of last year the familiar feelings resurfaced, OH was offered another job in Sydney and refused to go home. I gave it one last push in Sydney, in Blakehurst where I can honestly say, I became seriously homesick, extremely depressed and experienced some severe panic attacks, all whilst looking after my two children, alone all day in yet another huge isolating city. After several meetings with a therapist and seeing the effect it was having on our children, I came home. It saddens me greatly that unfortuneatly, my OH has chosen to stay in Australia and once again I had to come home alone.
We arrived back at Birmingham at 6.10pm on a Friday evening, my son elated and my daughter crying, after a 31 hour journey. I have not regretted my decision once and I will never go back to Australia. It's fair to say, there is not one single thing I miss about the place, I don't like having regrets, but I'm afraid I do regret going back, I do wish I had stuck with my initial reaction as I know now it was the right one and no amount of time would ever change that fact. I could go on and on about life for us in Australia, in a nutshell, (my OH has found everything he is and has been looking for all his life there) but I would rather look forward and tell you about the absolute contrast we have in our lives today, here back in the UK.
We are home. And it's beautiful, serene and peaceful. My garden at home is stunning, green, pinks, purples and the gorgeous smell of lavender. My neighbours talk to me, we stop outside in the light evenings and chat, they know my children's names and have known us for years. My home is mine, not some craphole for $800.00 a week with cockroaches for company and damp cupboards, my children are laughing in the garden and my son comes up to me and says 'thank you for bringing me home' or puts a thumbs up at dinner. It's rained and I love it, the colour has returned to my daughters cheeks and they have both stayed at Grandma's house whilst I had friends round with whom I have known for years. I have always loved flowers and our home is literally overflowing with them!! Oh, and they aren't wilting!
My son has just finished at Nursery, since we had been away, a new Children's Centre had been completed, all the staff the same, just a new building with state of the art equipment, this has been the highlight to being home, seeing my son happy, playing with his friends. He has started trampolining, football and swimming and my daughter is thriving. We no longer wander around hot parks or spend days upon days alone trying to make friends. We have been camping in beautiful Wales with my brother and his family, sat and looked out over the valley's with a £1.99 bbq whilst he plans where he is going to build his house on their plot of land. We have stayed at our friend's house and sat in the garden, just content to be there and had a great time at The Irish Centre for my cousin's birthday. The whole shopping experience is fantastic, lots of choice and value for money.
I feel like me again and I feel like a a great mom again. I would never had wanted my children to grow up in Australia, I do feel they have a much better life here. Things are obviously very painful still where my OH is concerned but he has to make his own choices in his life. I function much better here nad I know a happy mum means happy children. My son especially struggled with being in Australia, it broke my heart to see him so unhappy, missing his Grandpa and I feel a peace in my heart to know he is home and happy. I now see a homeopath who is superb to help me and my strength is returning from going to the gym and swimming to recover from whta has been a very difficult time. I know when I heard the song by U2 on the radio, 'It's a beautiful day, don't let it get away' that I belong at home in the UK.
I wish anyone that is heading to Australia all the best as afterall these are only our experiences and I would like to think that the only and best advice I can offer is if you go as a family, make sure you decide that if it doesn't work for everyone there in the family unit, then it hasn't worked, a Country really isn't worth splitting up over. I felt I couldn't stay there but my OH felt he couldn't live here in the UK, it's very sad. Anyone who wants to get 'home' I hope it is soon for you.
Take care and keep smiling, axx
Jul 27th 2008, 9:21 pm
#12
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jun 2007
Location: South Island NZ
Posts: 527
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
All the best to you and your little ones! You go girl!
Cally xx
Jul 28th 2008, 2:59 am
#13
BE Forum Addict
Joined: May 2007
Location: England
Posts: 4,211
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
Hi everyone
Have been back in the UK for 12 weeks now and have finally bought myself a new computer, it's nice to see some familiar names on here and to those of you who are new on here, I hope things are ok for you, wherever you are.
I thought I would share my experiences of moving and living in Australia now I have come out the other side, so to speak and also hoping it may help anyone else out there, must say it does seem rather surreal, sitting here in my home in the UK as last time I was on here, I was in Sydney, about to return home! I hope I don't offend anyone, these are my views and my opinions, so I'm just going to say how I feel, about what has been a very trying two years.
A bit of background! My OH, a Civil Engineer had always wanted to head to Australia to live, we have two children, now 2 and 4 and after much soul searching and a good job offer, he left for Melbourne in August 2006 and I followed in Sept 2006, our children then 2 and 11 months. The life we left behind was pretty good, a lovely home, great family support, kids settled and me giving up a place at Uni to head to Australia, for the 'adventure' and having been there before, for that 'once in a lifetime opportunity'. It seemed a fantastic idea, we were excited and pretty determined to make it work. having travelled alot prior to having children and always quite independent and happy go lucky' it's fair to say I completely underestimated the enourmity of the task ahead.
My OH settled almost immediately at work, left at 7am, back at 6pm, he joined the golf nights out, had lunch meetings and generally immersed himsly into work. I, on the other hand, after a few days only, in an apartment with two little ones and my mum (she had come to help) had a dreadful feeling of 'this doesn't feel right'. We found a house after 6 weeks of searching, I knew we would be in the aprtment for the children's birthdays, but the reality of it really hit home. My son turned 3 and my daughter 1 within days of arriving and I really struggled without my family and friends. I hated seeing my son upset and my daughter became quite ill and unsettled in herself. Still, I put on a brave face and we moved into our new home in Camberwell.
I found a kinder for my son, 2 days a week and set about finding my way round. There is no doubt that Melbourne really is a stunning city, I quite enjoyed heading into the city on the tram and walking down St Kilda beach and began to settle into what I think now, was holiday mode! My mum went home and the day to day routine of living in Melbourne hit home. Christmas soon came round before I had chance to secure any real friendships at the playgroups and if I'm honest I found the whole thing exhausting, I found the mum's quite friendly, but also quite closed, our home in the UK was quite often full of laughter and my children's friends, here it felt empty, almost sterile, I began to spend 13 hour days with the little ones during the summer hols in Jan 07 and I began to get quite depressed in myself. Quite a catch 22situation as I knew I had to get out there to meet people but felt so teary in myself too.
My OH was thriving and we started to argue, I knew I felt quite unwell in myslef, he thought I hadn't tried hard enough and with two little ones in the middle things got tough between us. At this point I decided to head home to the UK on my own with our children to see how I felt, I knew I my reaction to living in Australia had shocked me, I really did not like it at all, I felt like I was living in a bubble of blandness, a continual 'holiday' but one that well, there was no end in sight, no chance to get 'home' and to be glad to be home. I hated the fact that the kids had no real friends, our social circle had gone and my son was upset about Grandma, in a nutshell, I just wanted 'home' and started to have panic attacks every day. I came back to the UK Feb 2007 without my OH, he refused to come back.
Our tenants moved out of our home in the UK and I went home with our children, my family and friends rallied round nad gave us some items for the house and I felt relieved to be home, but devestated that it was without OH. He returned for a visit in April 2007 and against my better judgement, decided to give Australia another go, the kid's missed their dad desperately if I'm honest, I guess I felt I had to give it longer and wanted my family back together. I went back in May 2007, this time to Coburg in Melbourne and threw myself into everything again, gym creche, music time, kinder but by November of last year the familiar feelings resurfaced, OH was offered another job in Sydney and refused to go home. I gave it one last push in Sydney, in Blakehurst where I can honestly say, I became seriously homesick, extremely depressed and experienced some severe panic attacks, all whilst looking after my two children, alone all day in yet another huge isolating city. After several meetings with a therapist and seeing the effect it was having on our children, I came home. It saddens me greatly that unfortuneatly, my OH has chosen to stay in Australia and once again I had to come home alone.
We arrived back at Birmingham at 6.10pm on a Friday evening, my son elated and my daughter crying, after a 31 hour journey. I have not regretted my decision once and I will never go back to Australia. It's fair to say, there is not one single thing I miss about the place, I don't like having regrets, but I'm afraid I do regret going back, I do wish I had stuck with my initial reaction as I know now it was the right one and no amount of time would ever change that fact. I could go on and on about life for us in Australia, in a nutshell, (my OH has found everything he is and has been looking for all his life there) but I would rather look forward and tell you about the absolute contrast we have in our lives today, here back in the UK.
We are home. And it's beautiful, serene and peaceful. My garden at home is stunning, green, pinks, purples and the gorgeous smell of lavender. My neighbours talk to me, we stop outside in the light evenings and chat, they know my children's names and have known us for years. My home is mine, not some craphole for $800.00 a week with cockroaches for company and damp cupboards, my children are laughing in the garden and my son comes up to me and says 'thank you for bringing me home' or puts a thumbs up at dinner. It's rained and I love it, the colour has returned to my daughters cheeks and they have both stayed at Grandma's house whilst I had friends round with whom I have known for years. I have always loved flowers and our home is literally overflowing with them!! Oh, and they aren't wilting!
My son has just finished at Nursery, since we had been away, a new Children's Centre had been completed, all the staff the same, just a new building with state of the art equipment, this has been the highlight to being home, seeing my son happy, playing with his friends. He has started trampolining, football and swimming and my daughter is thriving. We no longer wander around hot parks or spend days upon days alone trying to make friends. We have been camping in beautiful Wales with my brother and his family, sat and looked out over the valley's with a £1.99 bbq whilst he plans where he is going to build his house on their plot of land. We have stayed at our friend's house and sat in the garden, just content to be there and had a great time at The Irish Centre for my cousin's birthday. The whole shopping experience is fantastic, lots of choice and value for money.
I feel like me again and I feel like a a great mom again. I would never had wanted my children to grow up in Australia, I do feel they have a much better life here. Things are obviously very painful still where my OH is concerned but he has to make his own choices in his life. I function much better here nad I know a happy mum means happy children. My son especially struggled with being in Australia, it broke my heart to see him so unhappy, missing his Grandpa and I feel a peace in my heart to know he is home and happy. I now see a homeopath who is superb to help me and my strength is returning from going to the gym and swimming to recover from whta has been a very difficult time. I know when I heard the song by U2 on the radio, 'It's a beautiful day, don't let it get away' that I belong at home in the UK.
I wish anyone that is heading to Australia all the best as afterall these are only our experiences and I would like to think that the only and best advice I can offer is if you go as a family, make sure you decide that if it doesn't work for everyone there in the family unit, then it hasn't worked, a Country really isn't worth splitting up over. I felt I couldn't stay there but my OH felt he couldn't live here in the UK, it's very sad. Anyone who wants to get 'home' I hope it is soon for you.
Take care and keep smiling, axx
Have been back in the UK for 12 weeks now and have finally bought myself a new computer, it's nice to see some familiar names on here and to those of you who are new on here, I hope things are ok for you, wherever you are.
I thought I would share my experiences of moving and living in Australia now I have come out the other side, so to speak and also hoping it may help anyone else out there, must say it does seem rather surreal, sitting here in my home in the UK as last time I was on here, I was in Sydney, about to return home! I hope I don't offend anyone, these are my views and my opinions, so I'm just going to say how I feel, about what has been a very trying two years.
A bit of background! My OH, a Civil Engineer had always wanted to head to Australia to live, we have two children, now 2 and 4 and after much soul searching and a good job offer, he left for Melbourne in August 2006 and I followed in Sept 2006, our children then 2 and 11 months. The life we left behind was pretty good, a lovely home, great family support, kids settled and me giving up a place at Uni to head to Australia, for the 'adventure' and having been there before, for that 'once in a lifetime opportunity'. It seemed a fantastic idea, we were excited and pretty determined to make it work. having travelled alot prior to having children and always quite independent and happy go lucky' it's fair to say I completely underestimated the enourmity of the task ahead.
My OH settled almost immediately at work, left at 7am, back at 6pm, he joined the golf nights out, had lunch meetings and generally immersed himsly into work. I, on the other hand, after a few days only, in an apartment with two little ones and my mum (she had come to help) had a dreadful feeling of 'this doesn't feel right'. We found a house after 6 weeks of searching, I knew we would be in the aprtment for the children's birthdays, but the reality of it really hit home. My son turned 3 and my daughter 1 within days of arriving and I really struggled without my family and friends. I hated seeing my son upset and my daughter became quite ill and unsettled in herself. Still, I put on a brave face and we moved into our new home in Camberwell.
I found a kinder for my son, 2 days a week and set about finding my way round. There is no doubt that Melbourne really is a stunning city, I quite enjoyed heading into the city on the tram and walking down St Kilda beach and began to settle into what I think now, was holiday mode! My mum went home and the day to day routine of living in Melbourne hit home. Christmas soon came round before I had chance to secure any real friendships at the playgroups and if I'm honest I found the whole thing exhausting, I found the mum's quite friendly, but also quite closed, our home in the UK was quite often full of laughter and my children's friends, here it felt empty, almost sterile, I began to spend 13 hour days with the little ones during the summer hols in Jan 07 and I began to get quite depressed in myself. Quite a catch 22situation as I knew I had to get out there to meet people but felt so teary in myself too.
My OH was thriving and we started to argue, I knew I felt quite unwell in myslef, he thought I hadn't tried hard enough and with two little ones in the middle things got tough between us. At this point I decided to head home to the UK on my own with our children to see how I felt, I knew I my reaction to living in Australia had shocked me, I really did not like it at all, I felt like I was living in a bubble of blandness, a continual 'holiday' but one that well, there was no end in sight, no chance to get 'home' and to be glad to be home. I hated the fact that the kids had no real friends, our social circle had gone and my son was upset about Grandma, in a nutshell, I just wanted 'home' and started to have panic attacks every day. I came back to the UK Feb 2007 without my OH, he refused to come back.
Our tenants moved out of our home in the UK and I went home with our children, my family and friends rallied round nad gave us some items for the house and I felt relieved to be home, but devestated that it was without OH. He returned for a visit in April 2007 and against my better judgement, decided to give Australia another go, the kid's missed their dad desperately if I'm honest, I guess I felt I had to give it longer and wanted my family back together. I went back in May 2007, this time to Coburg in Melbourne and threw myself into everything again, gym creche, music time, kinder but by November of last year the familiar feelings resurfaced, OH was offered another job in Sydney and refused to go home. I gave it one last push in Sydney, in Blakehurst where I can honestly say, I became seriously homesick, extremely depressed and experienced some severe panic attacks, all whilst looking after my two children, alone all day in yet another huge isolating city. After several meetings with a therapist and seeing the effect it was having on our children, I came home. It saddens me greatly that unfortuneatly, my OH has chosen to stay in Australia and once again I had to come home alone.
We arrived back at Birmingham at 6.10pm on a Friday evening, my son elated and my daughter crying, after a 31 hour journey. I have not regretted my decision once and I will never go back to Australia. It's fair to say, there is not one single thing I miss about the place, I don't like having regrets, but I'm afraid I do regret going back, I do wish I had stuck with my initial reaction as I know now it was the right one and no amount of time would ever change that fact. I could go on and on about life for us in Australia, in a nutshell, (my OH has found everything he is and has been looking for all his life there) but I would rather look forward and tell you about the absolute contrast we have in our lives today, here back in the UK.
We are home. And it's beautiful, serene and peaceful. My garden at home is stunning, green, pinks, purples and the gorgeous smell of lavender. My neighbours talk to me, we stop outside in the light evenings and chat, they know my children's names and have known us for years. My home is mine, not some craphole for $800.00 a week with cockroaches for company and damp cupboards, my children are laughing in the garden and my son comes up to me and says 'thank you for bringing me home' or puts a thumbs up at dinner. It's rained and I love it, the colour has returned to my daughters cheeks and they have both stayed at Grandma's house whilst I had friends round with whom I have known for years. I have always loved flowers and our home is literally overflowing with them!! Oh, and they aren't wilting!
My son has just finished at Nursery, since we had been away, a new Children's Centre had been completed, all the staff the same, just a new building with state of the art equipment, this has been the highlight to being home, seeing my son happy, playing with his friends. He has started trampolining, football and swimming and my daughter is thriving. We no longer wander around hot parks or spend days upon days alone trying to make friends. We have been camping in beautiful Wales with my brother and his family, sat and looked out over the valley's with a £1.99 bbq whilst he plans where he is going to build his house on their plot of land. We have stayed at our friend's house and sat in the garden, just content to be there and had a great time at The Irish Centre for my cousin's birthday. The whole shopping experience is fantastic, lots of choice and value for money.
I feel like me again and I feel like a a great mom again. I would never had wanted my children to grow up in Australia, I do feel they have a much better life here. Things are obviously very painful still where my OH is concerned but he has to make his own choices in his life. I function much better here nad I know a happy mum means happy children. My son especially struggled with being in Australia, it broke my heart to see him so unhappy, missing his Grandpa and I feel a peace in my heart to know he is home and happy. I now see a homeopath who is superb to help me and my strength is returning from going to the gym and swimming to recover from whta has been a very difficult time. I know when I heard the song by U2 on the radio, 'It's a beautiful day, don't let it get away' that I belong at home in the UK.
I wish anyone that is heading to Australia all the best as afterall these are only our experiences and I would like to think that the only and best advice I can offer is if you go as a family, make sure you decide that if it doesn't work for everyone there in the family unit, then it hasn't worked, a Country really isn't worth splitting up over. I felt I couldn't stay there but my OH felt he couldn't live here in the UK, it's very sad. Anyone who wants to get 'home' I hope it is soon for you.
Take care and keep smiling, axx
Jackie
Jul 28th 2008, 3:04 am
#14
BE Forum Addict
Joined: May 2007
Location: England
Posts: 4,211
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
All the best and take care
Jul 28th 2008, 11:03 am
#15
poole ,dorset . love it
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,281
Re: A family seperated after move to Australia
You don't get prison service for 20 years anymore!!! good luck KK why don't you start planning now if you know when your sons app. finishes?...it will give you a forcus and something to look forward to, that's what keeps me going....just about!!!!! I know exactly which Man City game I want to go to (our first against Manu U) and when I am would like to visit York (always wanted to go around Christmas time)....that kind of thing....
All the best and take care
All the best and take care
I am going to hang on here till the lad finishes [if i can] then i will return with my lad if he wishes too.