Back 20 months and just starting to struggle.
May 29th 2012 | 2:59 am
#16
BE Co-Founder
Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 25,930
From: Florida
Re: Back 20 months and just starting to struggle.
Hi PoppetUK,
Please come back to this thread and let us know how you are doing
Please come back to this thread and let us know how you are doing
May 29th 2012 | 3:08 am
#17
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 8,390
From: Canberra
Re: Back 20 months and just starting to struggle.
I have read loads of Quolls posts over the years and always manages to put the boot in to Australians?Yes she was being supportive to the OP.I wasn't being over sensitive just fed up of putting all Australians in one basket.I would like to think my friends of over 30 years aren't fair weathered friends.
I dont put the boot into Australians all the time - I'm married to one for heavens sake (he doesnt have any close Aussie friends either) and have two Aussie sons (neither of them have close Aussie friendships either but one has really great Pommie friends after being here 10 years). But, then, maybe they arent your archetypal Aussies because I do get on with them LOL.
May 30th 2012 | 8:10 pm
#18
Forum Regular
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 64
Re: Back 20 months and just starting to struggle.
I grew up in Australia but moved to UK at 20years old,since I moved back to Australia I have made new friends in the last 16 years I have been here,as well as a getting back with my old friends.What I am trying to say is that not all Australians are the same.I know you are married to an Aussie and you have children as I said I have read your posts.
I am reading this site moving back home, because we are going back at the end of the year to live.I am not getting upset that you prefer UK and you want to go home ,what I don't like is that you and a few people on BE have said that Australians are superficial and that you can't have a deep meaning conversation and are not true friends.That I do find insulting.Some might be like that but I am sure the same applies in the UK as well.Anyway let's hope PoppetUK does settle and make friends and yes it does get harder as we get older.
I haven't got time to reread this so hope it makes sense.
I am reading this site moving back home, because we are going back at the end of the year to live.I am not getting upset that you prefer UK and you want to go home ,what I don't like is that you and a few people on BE have said that Australians are superficial and that you can't have a deep meaning conversation and are not true friends.That I do find insulting.Some might be like that but I am sure the same applies in the UK as well.Anyway let's hope PoppetUK does settle and make friends and yes it does get harder as we get older.
I haven't got time to reread this so hope it makes sense.
Jun 13th 2012 | 8:44 am
#19
aussie married to a brit!
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 302
From: UK
Re: Back 20 months and just starting to struggle.
quote belle30 "I grew up in Australia but moved to UK at 20years old,since I moved back to Australia I have made new friends in the last 16 years I have been here,as well as a getting back with my old friends.What I am trying to say is that not all Australians are the same.I know you are married to an Aussie and you have children as I said I have read your posts.
I am reading this site moving back home, because we are going back at the end of the year to live.I am not getting upset that you prefer UK and you want to go home ,what I don't like is that you and a few people on BE have said that Australians are superficial and that you can't have a deep meaning conversation and are not true friends.That I do find insulting.Some might be like that but I am sure the same applies in the UK as well.Anyway let's hope PoppetUK does settle and make friends and yes it does get harder as we get older.
I haven't got time to reread this so hope it makes sense."
well, i'm an australian too, and we moved back to australia from the uk in 2009...being very friendly and talkative types didn't help at all in making friends when we moved to the gold coast! after a year, we left and went to sydney,as we never came across any real potential friend material in Qld! sydney, we met alot more friendly ,interesting types, but as in alot of big cities, everyone is too busy, so was still hard to make real friendships...
last year, in march, we ended up back in the uk, and by divine intervention, in the conwy valley,north wales.
we have met SO MANY interesting, nice people, an have integrated well into the community, and made many really good friends!
we were no different to people over in aus as we were here! people just seem to have more time, and value community here...quolls experiences are valid, as are mine, as are yours!
as i said, i was born in aus... i just happen to prefer and get along better with the way british people do things!
it is what is is, and i think its rude of belle30 to suggest quoll is being unduly negative because she doesn't like her opinion! i too, on my return visit came across alot of the "superficial people, that you can't have a deep meaning conversation with that were not true friends."
i don't understan how you can be insulted by someones experience! grow up!
I am reading this site moving back home, because we are going back at the end of the year to live.I am not getting upset that you prefer UK and you want to go home ,what I don't like is that you and a few people on BE have said that Australians are superficial and that you can't have a deep meaning conversation and are not true friends.That I do find insulting.Some might be like that but I am sure the same applies in the UK as well.Anyway let's hope PoppetUK does settle and make friends and yes it does get harder as we get older.
I haven't got time to reread this so hope it makes sense."
You have to remember this is Britishexpats site and their own views on living in other countries. As you are an Australian you may not like those views and you probably aren't alone in that as there other foreign nationals who choose to read this site too and then get upset. i.e. the US citizen who lives in the UK and comes on this list, then goes when something is said about Americans and then comes back to the list and then goes when something is said about Americans...........................
It's a case of growing a thick skin or just stick to reading the Australian sites.
To the OP, as others have said, join some clubs to find people with the same interests as you.
It's a case of growing a thick skin or just stick to reading the Australian sites.
To the OP, as others have said, join some clubs to find people with the same interests as you.
last year, in march, we ended up back in the uk, and by divine intervention, in the conwy valley,north wales.
we have met SO MANY interesting, nice people, an have integrated well into the community, and made many really good friends!
we were no different to people over in aus as we were here! people just seem to have more time, and value community here...quolls experiences are valid, as are mine, as are yours!
as i said, i was born in aus... i just happen to prefer and get along better with the way british people do things!
it is what is is, and i think its rude of belle30 to suggest quoll is being unduly negative because she doesn't like her opinion! i too, on my return visit came across alot of the "superficial people, that you can't have a deep meaning conversation with that were not true friends."
i don't understan how you can be insulted by someones experience! grow up!
Jun 13th 2012 | 10:15 am
#20
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 460
From: Brisvegas
Re: Back 20 months and just starting to struggle.
Last year I went back to the UK for a long holiday and met up with a friend from university in 1985! In the interim period we had met partners, had kids etc... It was like we had never been separated - we had a fabulous lunch, caught up with 25+ years of gossip. We don't correspond often but I'll catch up with her when I go back again. Something about true friendship I can't put my finger on, you just don't need to work on it
Jun 13th 2012 | 10:28 am
#21
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 1,761
From: Westernport Mornington Peninsula
Re: Back 20 months and just starting to struggle.
Well, arent you the lucky one!
I dont look down on Australians and I have many acquaintances but (and I know that I am not alone here) they dont stick beyond the circumstances of acquaintanceship - be that work, child's development, interest group etc. I am, in fact, an extremely friendly person but I have been stung too many times by Aussies who have been just out for what they could get out of a friendship - all take and not much give. Pretty much all my "Aussie" friends are, in fact, expat Poms and most of them are dead jealous that I have been able to leave and they havent. Even so, they havent stuck as much as I thought they might (probably because they are jealous of what I now have!) even though they knew I was doing it tough here. My long standing Pom friends couldnt have been more supportive even though some live at the other end of the country!
I dont look down on Australians and I have many acquaintances but (and I know that I am not alone here) they dont stick beyond the circumstances of acquaintanceship - be that work, child's development, interest group etc. I am, in fact, an extremely friendly person but I have been stung too many times by Aussies who have been just out for what they could get out of a friendship - all take and not much give. Pretty much all my "Aussie" friends are, in fact, expat Poms and most of them are dead jealous that I have been able to leave and they havent. Even so, they havent stuck as much as I thought they might (probably because they are jealous of what I now have!) even though they knew I was doing it tough here. My long standing Pom friends couldnt have been more supportive even though some live at the other end of the country!
If I get dropped by friends or they drift away, I do not wonder and feel that its Australia, I think it must be me and move on.
Jun 13th 2012 | 11:45 am
#22
BE Enthusiast
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 914
From: UK Devon
Re: Back 20 months and just starting to struggle.
This is from Dodinsky's Garden of Thoughts and is very true!
When people walk away from you... Let them go... Your destiny is never tied to anyone who leaves you, and it doesn't mean they are bad people. It just means that their part in your story is over.
When people walk away from you... Let them go... Your destiny is never tied to anyone who leaves you, and it doesn't mean they are bad people. It just means that their part in your story is over.
