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Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Old Nov 23rd 2009 | 7:42 am
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Default Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Lived in NS and NB for 2 and a half years in total, however moved back to the UK in August this year. Why you ask? Mainly due to family for the kids, career prospects, to avoid long winters(and snow) which as a family we didn't enjoy and to avoid the high costs of living relative to the low salaries.

So now we are here in good jobs, renting a house and kids are in a great school, and near to the family........so why do I feel like something is not right? I miss Canada....how do I get over that? Is it dangerous/insane to think that maybe one day we could go back?

Would love to hear from anyone who is going through the same emotions!!!!
 
Old Nov 23rd 2009 | 7:53 am
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

I haven't left Canada yet (due to leave next week) and I'm already feeling those pangs of "am I doing the right thing?" although I don't have any other choice! My other half is staying behind in Canada as his working visa was longer than mine and I actually can see myself going back to live in Canada someday but in the mean time I'm happy to be going back to Northern Ireland.

Alot of people have said to me though it takes a trip back to realise just where you wanna be!
 
Old Nov 23rd 2009 | 8:01 am
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Originally Posted by mtnjt
Lived in NS and NB for 2 and a half years in total, however moved back to the UK in August this year. Why you ask? Mainly due to family for the kids, career prospects, to avoid long winters(and snow) which as a family we didn't enjoy and to avoid the high costs of living relative to the low salaries.

So now we are here in good jobs, renting a house and kids are in a great school, and near to the family........so why do I feel like something is not right? I miss Canada....how do I get over that? Is it dangerous/insane to think that maybe one day we could go back?

Would love to hear from anyone who is going through the same emotions!!!!
I'm surprised you are feeling culture shock after just two and a half years away. has the UK (or have you) changed that much in such a short period of time? Or are you saying that you are having second thoughts (maybe that's the same as culture shock, but I don't think so)?

After 23 years away, I have felt culture shock since being back, over 3 years now and although I have adjusted to some things (like watching rugby instead of American football), I still feel more at home when I visit the States once or twice a year than I do here. It is as much due to the very different work culture in my profession (academia) as it is due to the different lifestyle here.
 
Old Nov 23rd 2009 | 8:02 am
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Good Luck with your move back!!! Hope you enjoy being back in NI!
 
Old Nov 23rd 2009 | 12:52 pm
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Originally Posted by mtnjt
Lived in NS and NB for 2 and a half years in total, however moved back to the UK in August this year. Why you ask? Mainly due to family for the kids, career prospects, to avoid long winters(and snow) which as a family we didn't enjoy and to avoid the high costs of living relative to the low salaries.

So now we are here in good jobs, renting a house and kids are in a great school, and near to the family........so why do I feel like something is not right? I miss Canada....how do I get over that? Is it dangerous/insane to think that maybe one day we could go back?

Would love to hear from anyone who is going through the same emotions!!!!
Excellent idea for a thread - look forward to reading people's opinions.
 
Old Nov 23rd 2009 | 1:23 pm
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

I think it is the curse of the expat - there are many posts on Ping Pom Poms - usually those who make the change and return home within a year or two. There seems to be the continual angst about "whether we could have made it work" and odious comparisons. I guess you have to come to terms with what drove you back in the first place - you werent happy enough to stay in Canada so why was that?
 
Old Nov 23rd 2009 | 2:36 pm
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Originally Posted by quoll
I think it is the curse of the expat - there are many posts on Ping Pom Poms - usually those who make the change and return home within a year or two. There seems to be the continual angst about "whether we could have made it work" and odious comparisons. I guess you have to come to terms with what drove you back in the first place - you werent happy enough to stay in Canada so why was that?
He says jobs and winter in his first post.
 
Old Nov 23rd 2009 | 3:33 pm
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Originally Posted by hereandthere
He says jobs and winter in his first post.
Sorry, I meant it was more as a rhetorical question = so what has changed that makes you think those reasons will no longer be valid
 
Old Nov 23rd 2009 | 8:10 pm
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

It was a difficult decision to come back and was made after months of deliberating(very stressful). My OH wanted to come back for all the previous reasons I mention and my eldest son,age 10 (he didnt like the winters and missed football).
I on the other hand could have stayed, although yes I didnt like the winters, but there is something about Canada that I deeply love! I lived in California as a child, so maybe it reminded me of that in some way.
How do you ever know where you are meant to be? Can a change in geography really make you happy?
 
Old Nov 23rd 2009 | 9:37 pm
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

I lived in SA for nearly 30 years - I am half South African - and came back in June, mainly because my wife returned 3 years ago and wanted to stay.

The UK is still a great country, and we live in a beautiful area (SW Scotland) but I don't want to live here. I loathe the weather, the long, dark nights, the over-regulated society and the "lifestyle"; and I miss Africa - the heat/sun, vast blue skies, open space and freedom - so much it hurts. Just me, I know.

A company I used to do a lot of work for have asked me to go back in January, and I probably will. Start of another long distance relationship I suppose.
 
Old Nov 23rd 2009 | 9:55 pm
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Well I think you've answered your own question.You just mentioned you could of stayed there,so I'm guessing then maybe you might feel abit resentful of being here?Its impossible I think sometimes to make a decision that ensures everyone will be 100% happy?if you were alone for example you might have decided to stay and not return to the UK.Its much more difficult I think when other family members want other things.I think if I were you,I would stay put for the time being,when your son is older,it might be feasible for you to return to where you want to be and depending on what your partner wants to do,you can all be happy.I would just focus on the now time,and not stress or over think it too much.Take each day as it comes and who knows what might happen in the future.Most of all,take good care of yourself xx
 
Old Nov 24th 2009 | 12:10 am
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Originally Posted by mtnjt
Lived in NS and NB for 2 and a half years in total, however moved back to the UK in August this year. Why you ask? Mainly due to family for the kids, career prospects, to avoid long winters(and snow) which as a family we didn't enjoy and to avoid the high costs of living relative to the low salaries.

So now we are here in good jobs, renting a house and kids are in a great school, and near to the family........so why do I feel like something is not right? I miss Canada....how do I get over that? Is it dangerous/insane to think that maybe one day we could go back?

Would love to hear from anyone who is going through the same emotions!!!!
Did you ever think of moving to another area of Canada? If you, as a family, didn't enjoy the winters then what about BC?

Does your family feel the same as you? Or are they happy to be in the UK?
 
Old Nov 24th 2009 | 12:14 am
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Originally Posted by mtnjt
I on the other hand could have stayed, although yes I didnt like the winters, but there is something about Canada that I deeply love! I lived in California as a child, so maybe it reminded me of that in some way.
The 30 below temperatures and the presence of snow for months on end reminded you of California?

Is there something people have been hiding from us?
 
Old Nov 24th 2009 | 1:35 am
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Originally Posted by mtnjt
Lived in NS and NB for 2 and a half years in total, however moved back to the UK in August this year. Why you ask? Mainly due to family for the kids, career prospects, to avoid long winters(and snow) which as a family we didn't enjoy and to avoid the high costs of living relative to the low salaries.

So now we are here in good jobs, renting a house and kids are in a great school, and near to the family........so why do I feel like something is not right? I miss Canada....how do I get over that? Is it dangerous/insane to think that maybe one day we could go back?

Would love to hear from anyone who is going through the same emotions!!!!
I'm feeling that same way myself...living in canada since a child..near Toronto, small town etc...and just returned to my roots, only been here 3mths and getting a bit homesick for what was???? maybe I just need more time???
 
Old Nov 24th 2009 | 2:02 am
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Default Re: Anyone experiencing reverse culture shock?

Originally Posted by BristolUK
The 30 below temperatures and the presence of snow for months on end reminded you of California?

Is there something people have been hiding from us?
If you lived in the Sierras maybe. Truckee is one of those places that has had snow just about every month of the year at some point. Brrrr. Think "Donner party"
 

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