I've been lurking for a while and have finally decided to post.

I've been out of the UK for 8 years now. Three in Spain and five in the US. I'm desparately unhappy over here and really want to go back. I've been feeling like this for at least three years and it's like once you plant that seed of going back it just takes on a life of it's own.

Only fly in the ointment is my American husband. He'd never ever go to England to live. I can barely get him to visit there such is his dislike for the place. My marriage is far from perfect so I'm resigned to the fact that going back means going back alone (no kids). I've just hit 40 and I feel like time is whizzing by and I don't want to wait much longer.

I've started the pet passport scheme for my cat and am in the process of rehoming my two horses. I'll be going home totally broke.

For some reason I'm more scared of moving back to England than I was moving to Spain or America. Does anyone else feel that way?

You might be totally broke and you might go back alone but you have made a decision that will ultimately make you happier.

I am not in your position but many others are and its normal to be scared.

You may well have to start again and build up your life but it is your life and it begins the minute you make decisions that will make you happier in the long term.

The future starts now and as you say, time is whizzing by so don't waste another minute.

And you certainly are not alone.

It's totally normal to feel scared. When you move away, it's like a big unknown adventure. Returning is different, especially for you because you will be doing it alone and have the added stress and heartache of ending your marriage.

I can't tell you the amount of conversations that we had before we finally decided to come home because we were so scared that we would be making the wrong decision - happily we made the right choice.

Good luck - hope it all works well for you

I can totally identify with how you feel. But even though it must be scary, is it not also a teeny-weeny bit exciting? Starting again - albeit with some baggage?

Have you kept in touch with friends back home? Do you still have names and contact details of past employers and people you used to work with?

The Guardian has a Saturday supplement with lots of ads from people looking for flat sharers. Gumtree is another useful resource

Freecycle and Craig's List, as well as Loot, are useful sources for all kinds of 'stuff'.

The Motley Fool has dozens of discussion boards on just about every aspect of life in the UK. (www.fool.co.uk)

But have you got your US citizenship? I would not leave without that - just in case...

Wishing you all the best!

Thanks for that. Luckily all my family have lived overseas at one time or another so are really supportive. I'm happy I've made the decision to go back and need to stop sweating the details like how do banks work these days, how do you go about setting up your career again and what's a CHAV!

Thanks for all the great info. I was freelance before and haven't kept up my contacts but I'll try and get temp work until I sort myself out then maybe try and get back into my old line of work (media) or try something totally different.

I'm eligable for Citizenship now but don't want to stick out the very lengthy wait. I defo won't want to live here again. I don't exactly hate the place but it's just not me.

Any ideas of where in the UK you will settle?

Yes, I'm definitely scared. But hopeful too. I don't have husband or kids to hold me back. Actually, the only reason I'm still here is that I'm trying to sell a rent house. Once that's taken care of, I'll be free and clear.

When I was 24 and came to the US, I guess I was too naive to worry!

Sarah in Texas

Sadly my friends and family are all in West London and Weybridge. They did have to pick the most expensive areas in England!

When do you plan on moving back Sarah? I've got the 6-7 month cat passport thing to wait out.

I don't think it's a lengthy wait - 6-12 months seems typical.

Where do you live? I applied for citizenship in August 2005 and had it by the end of March 2006. I'm in south Texas.

Sarah in Texas

Just arrive at the airport dressed like this and you can join the chav club - thankfully they are limited to certain areas and can be avoided

Once I sell the rent house I will move forward. I have two dogs that I'd like to take back with me. Unfortunately I think that presents its own problems as it seems that landlords don't much care for dogs . . .

I'm planning to rent something, initially somewhere around Luton -- because that is equidistant between London, Cambridge, and Oxford, where (I think) I'm most likely to be able to find employment in my field (editing). I don't really care where I live (though I do have some preferences if I had my druthers). I have family in London, Worcestershire, and Devon.

Sarah in Texas

I'm in Mass. It seems to average about 12 months but I don't want to wait that long over here when it's really not something I want.

[QUOTE=Shivster;5009672]I've been lurking for a while and have finally decided to post.

I've been out of the UK for 8 years now. Three in Spain and five in the US. I'm desparately unhappy over here and really want to go back.

Wishing you all the luck,for your new start, be brave,you will have loads of support, as you already may have gathered.These lovely people have either been there,going there or done it,and give good advice.