Want2no

I need serious, honest advice here. It is a matter of great importance
as my friend has several good marriage proposals for his daughter who is
a graduate in Computer Science herself. She is Pakistani citizen and is
in Pakistan.

One of the proposals that my friend does have a preference for due to
old family relations and background comes with a caveat. The boy is in
USA and is a GC holder (not citizen). Now he has heard horror stories
about the process of new couple being able to start a life together due
to various immigration related delays spread over years. Is that true?
If so, what is the course of action the boy can take to remedy it or
should they just drop him as an eligible bachelor and concentrate on the
other 2-3 good proposals that they are considering.
As you can see this is really important decision specially in cases of
arranged marriages. Parents want to do their best but obviously they
also want to take a decision within reasonable time as those proposing
are also eager.

Please help.

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Posted via http://expatforums.com

akvrpn

salaam,

It is better if the boy/groom is a US citizen. It will take years if he
gets married while on green card to have his wife sponsored. Wait till
he becomes US citizen.

Do you know where the boy was born ? For pakistanis, they are doing
more and more background searches and giving them a tough time.

Noorah101

I agree. The boy can get married and apply for his wife now, and then when he becomes a citizen, he can notify USCIS and have the case continue based on his citizenship, which will proceed faster.

Do you know when he will be eligible for citizenship? That would be the key question here.

Best Wishes,
Rene

Just Jenney

AKVRPN is right -- If they marry before he becomes a US citizen, it will take YEARS to bring her her. That is NOT an exaggeration.

Is this man eligible for US citizenship? I assume that since his family is making the marriage proposal to your friend's daughter, he is willing to do whatever it takes to make marriage to her a reality. If so, then he needs to become a US citizen.

If he's willing/able to do that, then the next question becomes, Is your friend's family (and the daughter in particular) willing to delay marriage for however long it takes for him to become a US citizen? (Sorry, I don't know what sort of timeframe that would be, but others here might.)

As far as whether your friend's family should pass this guy over in favor of another suiter, that's something I'll refrain from responding to. I have no experience in this sort of cultural tradition and, with all due respect, actually find it quite strange. I realize arranged marriages do exist; I just think the potential spouses should be able to marry whomever they choose based on their own preferences, not their families'.

~ Jenney

Noorah101

Hi Jenney,

Welcome to the Middle East. hehehe

Rene

Just Jenney

Just read Rene's response and wanted to say that my comments above did not address what would happen if they married and he became a US citizen afterwards. Didn't mean to confuse anybody -- Rene's got it right. (As usual!)

~ Jenney

Just Jenney

No kidding!

~ Jenney

Matthew Udall

How did he obtain his greencard? There "are" certain reasons why someone might want to give up their greencard status and then file for it again (maybe this time as a married man). If he's got an easy way to file again, it might be something to look into (or like others said, file for his wife after he becomes a USC).

The arranged marriage situation seems strange to me too (although I also know it exists). Do all of the potential grooms come with a ticket to the U.S. for the bride?

scrubbedexpat099

Surprised nobody has made the obvious solution, he could just go home.

Noorah101

I'm sure the point is to find a suitable groom who can bring the bride to live in the USA. That's a big plus for the potential groom's acceptance by the bride's family.

Rene

Matthew Udall

What's more important to the family? Having their daughter in a loving marriage to a wonderful man regardless of where he lives, or marriage to the best guy they can find in the U.S?

Is getting the daughter to the U.S. the paramount objective (even if that means marrying a Grinch)? (Not to mention that there is a growing segment of the world’s population that seems hell bent on the destruction of the United States).

Noorah101

Good questions!

From what I've seen, if a suitable husband (not a Grinch type) can be found who can bring the bride to the USA, so much the better. I imagine if all they can find is the Grinch type, they won't go for him.

Just total speculation on my part for the sake of discussion.

Rene

scrubbedexpat099

Sounds suspiciously like for immigration benefit.

Noorah101

I disagree. Arranged marriages can be entered into good faith, with the intent of remaining together forever, just like marriages where the partners find each other.

I agree that some people might try it for an immigration benefit, but I wouldn't say that's always the case, or that it's the case in this scenario.

Rene

scrubbedexpat099

Not sure what else you would call it, determining factor seems to be immigrating and which suitor best meets that needs.