Gary

Thought I'd throw in my experience on the 27th Feb 2004...I haven't
been to London for years so I thought I would go into a bit of detail
about practicalities. It's been covered well here in the past so I
won't mention everything.

I flew to Heathrow from Glasgow on the 26th and landed at 1pm. My
friend met me and we took the tube from Heathrow along to Green Park.
It was about £4.40 UKP for the ticket from a machine at the station
(hit the left side of the label for the ticket price to come up and
then start firing in your pennies). Heathrow is in zone 6 and you
need to get to zone 1 (all day travel card from there). Changed at
Green Park to Bond Street - 1 stop later moved off to get onto another
tube to go the other 1 stop to Marble Arch. Turned right outside the
Marble Arch tube station and there was Marble Arch. If you plan on
staying at the Bryanston Hotel you only need to go to the street in
line with the arch itself. The hotel is on the right hand side a
couple of blocks down. The Concorde hotel is right next door to it
and you have to book in at the Bryanston for the Concorde. Dr Phelans
is right opposite as we know.

The staff at the hotel were reasonably friendly. It's just as well
really when I tell you about the room they gave me. If you get
offered room 114 - tell them to poke it where the sun doesn't shine!
It's a room on a back set of stairs heading towards the back of the
hotel. It certainly wasn't the Ritz and the room was a wee bit
claustrophobic. There was a single bed, hair dryer, hot radiator as
soon as you walk in, tv with a broken remote control (same in the last
few hotels I've been in) and a bathroom that had slats instead of a
proper door to go into. The door was narrow and I had to open both
sides and pull towards me to get in. This was a bit awkward. The
room seemed clean until I noticed that the bathroom had mould on the
ceiling along with redish drips on it (nicotine?).

Anyway, I went for a bath and had both feet in when I noticed the
'decor'. A ring round the bath of pubic hairs. It took ages to fill
the bath with hot water originally and I was already in so... I had a
shower after I let the bath run out. At least there was plenty hot
water - I had visions of me sitting in an inch and a half of water
flicking the water up over me with my fingers... Anyway, fair enough
I thought - can't expect Buckingham Palace for 54 quid for the night.
I closed the window I had opened to let the bathroom steam out as it
was getting a bit nippy and was due to be a cold night. Later I went
to bed and was awoken by some North African people knocking on all the
doors, presumably looking for a party. They were quite loud and
marched up and down the stairs. Eventually they left when they got no
takers.

I was awakened at 4.03am with the cold nipping at my toes. I couldn't
believe it. I jumped up to check the radiator but it was still
boiling hot. The bottom of my bed to the radiator couldn't have been
more than 4 feet but the cold coming in through the window frames was
emptying the room of any heat. So, I got my socks and a t-shirt on
and went back to bed. The cold got me up again at 6.03 but I decided
to get up as I had the embassy at 8am. I booked out the room and
asked if I could leave my bag in their store room. It's a free
service but saves you from carrying your stuff around or getting
knocked back at the embassy with it.

The embassy is down Park Lane and then turn left either past the Aston
Martin showroom or the street after. The street after takes you to
the queue you want directly. I was early for the embassy - 7.30 when
I walked by first time. There was a long line of people waiting for
holiday visas by the looks of things. I wandered around and came back
at 7.55. This time there was another line next to the concrete
barrier. I asked the guy with the clipboard and he told me to wait
there. We went in after showing the letter. The security guy in
charge of the portacabin was a bit cheeky but easily ignored. After
walking through the scanner, I went to the right side and in to give
up my mobile phone and then up to the office. Hand in your
appointment letter at the 1st booth and they seemed to call people in
that order. When you get called, they ask for your documents and go
over them quickly. I got the South African guy (going by his accent)
and he was okay. He almost stressed me out when he looked at my
wife's affidavit and said that it wasn't right. I said I had a joint
sponsor and that the papers were there. This did the trick. (I was
worried in case he had spotted something else! Something I had
missed?!) He gave me a coloured slip to take to the cashiers booth at
the back of the room and cough up the $335. I paid in $'s and took
the receipt right over to him. I was then to take a seat and waited
about 15 mins before a voice over the tannoy said to go to booth 6.
This was the American official who notarized my signature and went
over my application a wee bit more. He didn't ask anything too hard
but asked if I didn't own a home. When I said I did he asked why I
didn't mention it and provide estate agent's valuation reports etc. I
said that the equity in my flat was only about £10K ($18000). He
agreed that that made sense then. He congratulated me and said I had
to go for the medical examination then and report back at 1pm. He
gave me back all my certificates and passport and appointment letter.

Up I went to the good Doctors. It's called the vaccination centre on
the door and has a brass sign saying Dr Phelan. I guess he must stay
upstairs there as there was a private buzzer on the left of the door.
You have to get buzzed in through the entry system on the right. The
nurse who took my blood was very coarse I must say. I'm not precious
by any means but, she noticed something was wrong after drawing out
the blood. She apologised and said it would bleed under the skin but
that I would live. I have a large bruise on the inside of my left arm
now - it went up like a large knot and I have 2 parallel lines filled
with blood under the skin. I've never had that before when giving
blood...

The x-ray guy seemed to stick to his script of jokes etc. I laughed
at his one of the Charles 1st thing when I had to put my head over the
x-ray plate. Some lady made the mistake of asking where the toilet
was and was appropriately ridiculed - the toilet is over there where
it says 'toilet' thing where you walked in etc. Anyway, you're told
not to put your top back on and then the Dr sees you. He looks into
your ears, eyes and takes your blood pressure. I think blood
pressures will be high in his office though! I was worried about mine
as I've been told it is high by my own GP. The breathing exercises
must have worked though as he didn't say anything only to hop onto the
table and undo my trousers. {GULP}

He asked me to cough but didn't grab anything - just immediately
starting pressing down on my stomach checking for a hernia. Back to a
seat and he said I would need the MMR jab. I was told to wait in the
waiting room on my x-ray and white slip for the MMR jab. I got these
and went upstairs. I left the slip on a table at the top of the
stairs and went and sat down. The nurse is different to the one
downstairs but was quite unpleasant. She asked me to come over to the
table then, when I did said 'other side' and gave a big sigh and puff
of air. That was her one free verbal 'shot over the bow' as far as I
was concerned. It cost 35 quid for the MMR and I gave her 40. She
asked if I had the 5 and I said 'I'm awfully sorry, I don't appear to'
(with a sh** eating grin of course). I think she got the message from
that. I walked over to the room at the front of the house and she
just jabbed my arm and that was it. She said she was supposed to tell
you to sit down for 5 mins till you felt better but, if you felt okay
then you can just go'. I left.

I had 2 hours to kill before the embassy and walked along Oxford
Street and got some tacky, overpriced souvenirs. A sandwich from Pret
a Manger and then off for a drink at the Wetherspoons near the Arch.
Wetherspoons is a comparatively cheap place for drinks and food.
They're about 2.30 for a pint where I had paid 2.90 a pint near
Downing Street the night before. It was a cold day and I had 2
t-shirts on from living in the Bryanston's 'Arctic' room the night
before.

1 o'clock came and I went back to the embassy where the queue had
amazingly totally disappeared. I showed my apointment letter to the
guy along with my passport and I went back in. Don't bother looking
for someone at the booths to tell them you're there for your stuff -
they're all busy behind the back - I just stood against the wall as
there was about 60 - 70 people waiting. Eventually, someone came out
and started shouting out names to go and get their envelopes. I
recognised the faces as being the ones in front of me in the embassy
that morning. My name was shouted out and I went over. He didn't
want to stamp my passport or anything. He handed me the visa which
was on a fancy piece of paper and stapled onto a thick envelope full
of papers. I've to hold it facing the immigration officer when I
visit the states he told me. He then congratulated me and said didn't
it feel great to be accepted! I couldn't disagree! I felt like the
others had done when they got their visas and I stood at the side and
read it all.

Back to the airport (single trip to zone 6 from the machine in Marble
Arch) and had enough time to get some food and more drinkies. The
Wetherspoons there has some 'surly' staff who informed me there was no
draught beer. The meal itself was okay. After I checked in
(e-tickets wasn't working) we went to the Cafe Rouge next to
Wetherspoons. The service there was excellent and, although the
drinks were more in line with central London, seemed more enjoyable.
I like the Hoegarden blonde beer from Germany and they sold it on
draught. With a slice of lemon in it. No matter though as I liked it
better than the Wetherspoons experience. Caught my plane which was a
mere 2 hours late and I was back in Glasgow an hour later. An hour
later still and I was back home. Cost - pounds - 105 for flights, 54
for the room, 125 for the Doc's exam, 35 for the MMR, 10 for the Tube,
$335 for the embassy, food and drink about 60. My frostbite is almost
better and I'm now very careful to check out any bath before I step
in.

Next trip away will be to the US South to stay! I first put the I130
in at the end of December and that was me visa in hand 27th of Feb.

Gary