Seham

Hi Rete, thanks so much for your input and don't take me wrong when I ask you this question because I understand everything of what you are saying, but..

If you were in a sinking boat with your child and your soul mate and the only way to keep it afloat, who would be the first for you to throw over-board to the sharks? Your soul mate or your child?

Thanks again so much for your thoughts.

Seham

sibsie

I'd jump and save them both. No reason you can't do the same.

Seham

Hi Sunflwrgrl, by the way, that is our state flower, the sunflower ").

I really don't think you would have anything to worry about as long as he has finalized all of his papers and is a citizen of the country.

They are only judging mine because he is from Morocco and is a Muslim even though they asked me No questions about him before labeling him as a Terrorist and then when I did try to tell them about him, they would not listen.

Thanks so much for your concerns and earlier wishes and good luck to you and your future husband!

Seham

Seham

Thanks sibsie. This is what I have concluded. Either way, if I accept Legal Permanent Guardianship or fight for adoption, they could still take my grandson away if I have any Contact with my Fiance. I would never put my grandchild at risk if I thought there could ever be the slightest chance of him being harmed in any way.

I will fight for both of them, even if it takes my last breath of air or my last dollar.

sibsie

I wish you the very best of luck with it. When you say that the question the fact that your fiance is Muslim... is that because you and your grandchild are of a different faith?

Seham

Hi again sibsie, well first of all I am embarrassed to say, but I actually posted under the wrong forum. First time I have ever been to this site. I am actually from the U.S. and since 911, the attack of the trade towers has happened, if you even mention Muslim around here, then they are instantly thought of as a Terrorist. Why people have to think in this way? I wish I could tell you because to me that just goes to show how narrow minded people really are.

Leslie

Hi Rete,

Morocco does provide police reports for their citizens, and it requires them of visiting/immigrating foreigners in many situations as well.

Seham

yes, Leslie you are correct. For one thing, they are one of the countries that are allowed to apply for the DV Lottery 2005 for a green card to enter the U.S.

sibsie

I used to get the same being Irish Catholic. Still do sometimes!

Rete

Sorry if you don't like my answer. But I would not hesitate in making that decision ... MY CHILD

Children did not ask to be borne; nor can they raise themselves, care for themselves; make responsible decisions for themselves. You have accepted the responsibility of your grandson. That is a higher responsibility than that of a parent in my eyes because you didn't have to do it but choose to.

The fact that I don't believe in soulmates is neither here or there. I believe in the emotion of love but if I had to choose between my husband or my child. The child wins hand down.

Rete

Seham

What is the difference between being Irish Catholic to just Catholic except maybe a little lighter skinned, lol, only joking. That is what I was raised as?

sibsie

To some people, Irish Catholic = IRA. Far less now that the ceasefire has been going so well but there are biggots out there in all walks of life. Sadly my own brother in law in one and makes frequent anti Irish comments.

Leslie

Seham,

There are a few very uneducated people that post on this forum, and you may hear from them. Ignore them, they are not worth your time.

However, I am curious, are you Muslim? Is your grandchild Muslim? I think that in a case of adoption a common religion may work in your favor. It does sound like you are dealing with some people that have a very narrow world view. It is still illegal to discriminate based on religion in the United States, but some people don't know that Islam is the second largest religion in the world as well as the second largest religion in the U.S., some people don't even know that Islam is a religion, they think it is a political affiliation. :sigh: Is there much of a Muslim community in your area? Folks don't tend to want to learn about things they don't have to. If the officials you are dealing with have never known any Muslim people, I can almost guarantee you what little they have learned is from the American media.

Anyway, if they have done background checks on your fiance, ask to see them. Maybe there is something there that you don't know about. Since there is a child involved, you have to make sure you are fighting on the right side. If your fiance does indeed have a clean background, I would think that you have some pretty valid options, some that have already been mentioned here. I don't want to sound demanding, but if you want help from the people on this forum, answer some of the specific questions we are asking, it will help us give you much more informed answers.

Good luck.

Leslie

Seham

Rete, you are right and I understand what you are saying, but my fiance was in the picture way before I got my grandson. What makes it right that I should have to choose between the two just because of their RACISM?

Rete

Yes Leslie I know that from your dealings with the US Consulate and the others whose spouses and/or fiancees come from Morocco. However, there are people from all over the world who are currently living in Morocco. The OP did not say her fiancee was originally from. He might have moved to Morocco and became a citizen there while having been raised and lived as a citizen in another Eastern or African nation. Hence my response.

Rete