UK TO CUT IMMIGRANT NUMBERS BY TEACHING THEM TO READ THE DAILY MAIL
Jul 14th 2010 | 10:48 pm
#1
Thread Starter
Beep
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 8,311
From: Here
UK TO CUT IMMIGRANT NUMBERS BY TEACHING THEM TO READ THE DAILY MAIL
The government is to cut the number of immigrants applying for UK citizenship by teaching them how to read the Daily Mail, it has been confirmed.
"Rahman Ahmed, a carpenter from a small village in northern Bangladesh who signed up to the pilot programme, revealed it took him just 90 seconds to realise he had made a 'terrible, terrible mistake'.
Standing at the the check-in queue at Heathrow airport, he said: "It not just fact that you all obviously hate me - I prepared for that - it that so many of you seem fascinated with fatness or thinness of stupid, talentless women.
"Then I notice how you all in constant panic about whether or not to eat tomatoes. Some days they are best thing ever, other days they kill you. I am thinking 'this is not product of healthy brain'."
"Rahman Ahmed, a carpenter from a small village in northern Bangladesh who signed up to the pilot programme, revealed it took him just 90 seconds to realise he had made a 'terrible, terrible mistake'.
Standing at the the check-in queue at Heathrow airport, he said: "It not just fact that you all obviously hate me - I prepared for that - it that so many of you seem fascinated with fatness or thinness of stupid, talentless women.
"Then I notice how you all in constant panic about whether or not to eat tomatoes. Some days they are best thing ever, other days they kill you. I am thinking 'this is not product of healthy brain'."
Jul 15th 2010 | 12:17 am
#2
Slob
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 6,345
From: Ottineau
Re: UK TO CUT IMMIGRANT NUMBERS BY TEACHING THEM TO READ THE DAILY MAIL
The government is to cut the number of immigrants applying for UK citizenship by teaching them how to read the Daily Mail, it has been confirmed.
"Rahman Ahmed, a carpenter from a small village in northern Bangladesh who signed up to the pilot programme, revealed it took him just 90 seconds to realise he had made a 'terrible, terrible mistake'.
Standing at the the check-in queue at Heathrow airport, he said: "It not just fact that you all obviously hate me - I prepared for that - it that so many of you seem fascinated with fatness or thinness of stupid, talentless women.
"Then I notice how you all in constant panic about whether or not to eat tomatoes. Some days they are best thing ever, other days they kill you. I am thinking 'this is not product of healthy brain'."
"Rahman Ahmed, a carpenter from a small village in northern Bangladesh who signed up to the pilot programme, revealed it took him just 90 seconds to realise he had made a 'terrible, terrible mistake'.
Standing at the the check-in queue at Heathrow airport, he said: "It not just fact that you all obviously hate me - I prepared for that - it that so many of you seem fascinated with fatness or thinness of stupid, talentless women.
"Then I notice how you all in constant panic about whether or not to eat tomatoes. Some days they are best thing ever, other days they kill you. I am thinking 'this is not product of healthy brain'."
This one, reported today, made me wonder. Who the hell came up with the idea of analysing that?
http://www.ottawacitizen.com/news/Dr...078/story.html
Jul 15th 2010 | 1:13 am
#3
Thread Starter
Beep
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 8,311
From: Here
Re: UK TO CUT IMMIGRANT NUMBERS BY TEACHING THEM TO READ THE DAILY MAIL
That looked a bit Daily Mash, but no.
This one, reported today, made me wonder. Who the hell came up with the idea of analysing that?
http://www.ottawacitizen.com/news/Dr...078/story.html
This one, reported today, made me wonder. Who the hell came up with the idea of analysing that?
http://www.ottawacitizen.com/news/Dr...078/story.html
As for the drowning report; it looks like somebody is justifying their job
I did note they didn't mention the status of the 10 drownees.
Jul 15th 2010 | 1:45 am
#4
Slob
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 6,345
From: Ottineau
Re: UK TO CUT IMMIGRANT NUMBERS BY TEACHING THEM TO READ THE DAILY MAIL
I did note the reference to Muslims. What next? The CAA does a study on the driving habits of Asians?
