someone hit Kai today
Feb 17th 2009, 10:38 am
#16
Cynically amused.
Joined: Oct 2002
Location: BC
Posts: 3,648
Re: someone hit Kai today
I totally try my best with Kai, I am not a perfect mother but I see something underlying in some people's posts that it is my fault. Maybe I am too emotional to reply to this but it isn't easy and he has been getting better and he was supervised and he always is and he is told always to keep his hands to himself but he can't help himself, he is punished eg.time-outs, things taken away or things not happening if he doesn't behave. He only turned 3 last month, and is not some kind of devil child and he has been seen by a psychologist who says there is nothing wrong with him
So in the space of a week he was shouted at by a woman because he took a toy of his son and now he has been slapped across the face and all afternoon since coming back he has been very withdrawn, wanting to be on his own and not playing, great for his self-confidence.
If there had been another witness then I would be going to court as there isn't we won't be.
So in the space of a week he was shouted at by a woman because he took a toy of his son and now he has been slapped across the face and all afternoon since coming back he has been very withdrawn, wanting to be on his own and not playing, great for his self-confidence.
If there had been another witness then I would be going to court as there isn't we won't be.
Feb 17th 2009, 11:34 am
#18
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Sherwood Park
Posts: 1,709
Re: someone hit Kai today
I totally try my best with Kai, I am not a perfect mother but I see something underlying in some people's posts that it is my fault. Maybe I am too emotional to reply to this but it isn't easy and he has been getting better and he was supervised and he always is and he is told always to keep his hands to himself but he can't help himself, he is punished eg.time-outs, things taken away or things not happening if he doesn't behave. He only turned 3 last month, and is not some kind of devil child and he has been seen by a psychologist who says there is nothing wrong with him
So in the space of a week he was shouted at by a woman because he took a toy of his son and now he has been slapped across the face and all afternoon since coming back he has been very withdrawn, wanting to be on his own and not playing, great for his self-confidence.
If there had been another witness then I would be going to court as there isn't we won't be.
So in the space of a week he was shouted at by a woman because he took a toy of his son and now he has been slapped across the face and all afternoon since coming back he has been very withdrawn, wanting to be on his own and not playing, great for his self-confidence.
If there had been another witness then I would be going to court as there isn't we won't be.
Even if Kai had hurt the other child....that does not give the parent the right to hit him.
Stop beating yourself up, some children are boisterious, it's not anything we do, it's just them, I really do know where your coming from.
He needs to keep socialising with the other children, so please don't hide away (been, there, done that....it doesn't help).
Linda
Feb 17th 2009, 7:11 pm
#19
has got PPR yay baby !!!!
Joined: Dec 2005
Location: cambridge ON , but originally ...otley, west yorks
Posts: 518
Re: someone hit Kai today
oh no the poor little thing ,
no one has the right to hit anyone else kid , you should have slapped her then you might have felt better
i know that sounds a bit rough but i really would go beserk if an adult hit my kids (can cope with other kids doing it , coz all kids will fight)
and as other poster aid , dont hide him away and not dare let him play , coz it will only make things worse !!
my son was boisterous and i was scared to take him anywhere in case he did anything wrong (i call it 1st child syndrome ,coz once you have 2 you dont stress over what people think as much lol ) but he grew out of it, hope you feel better soon x
no one has the right to hit anyone else kid , you should have slapped her then you might have felt better
i know that sounds a bit rough but i really would go beserk if an adult hit my kids (can cope with other kids doing it , coz all kids will fight)
and as other poster aid , dont hide him away and not dare let him play , coz it will only make things worse !!
my son was boisterous and i was scared to take him anywhere in case he did anything wrong (i call it 1st child syndrome ,coz once you have 2 you dont stress over what people think as much lol ) but he grew out of it, hope you feel better soon x
Feb 17th 2009, 7:40 pm
#20
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Nov 2007
Location: back in Cambs
Posts: 7,157
Re: someone hit Kai today
Take him out to a zoo or somwhere that will distract him today and enjoy each others company,
From what you have said and in your other posts your a very good mother for caring so much,
That was so horrible for you and Kai, i don't agree with smacking even your own let alone someone elses child,
Once someone held my child while there son hit and kicked mine he was 8 at the time and i was very pregnant with my daughter, i flew at her like someone possesed ( blame it on the hormones )
Frightened the life out of me afterwards
never actually hit her just pushed her off him 
You did the right thing with the police, at least you know what she looks like now and can watch out for her, make sure you have your mobile handy in future.
Hope you can move on Babs so Kai can
From what you have said and in your other posts your a very good mother for caring so much,
That was so horrible for you and Kai, i don't agree with smacking even your own let alone someone elses child,
Once someone held my child while there son hit and kicked mine he was 8 at the time and i was very pregnant with my daughter, i flew at her like someone possesed ( blame it on the hormones )
Frightened the life out of me afterwards
never actually hit her just pushed her off him You did the right thing with the police, at least you know what she looks like now and can watch out for her, make sure you have your mobile handy in future.
Hope you can move on Babs so Kai can
Feb 21st 2009, 9:49 am
#21
slanderer of the innocent
Joined: Dec 2008
Location: Vancouver, BC
Posts: 6,695
Re: someone hit Kai today
Even if Kai had hurt the other child....that does not give the parent the right to hit him.
Stop beating yourself up, some children are boisterious, it's not anything we do, it's just them, I really do know where your coming from.
He needs to keep socialising with the other children, so please don't hide away (been, there, done that....it doesn't help).
Linda
Stop beating yourself up, some children are boisterious, it's not anything we do, it's just them, I really do know where your coming from.
He needs to keep socialising with the other children, so please don't hide away (been, there, done that....it doesn't help).
Linda
I know where you are coming from too. It doesn't help when people assume you can just 'teach' them not to hug too hard, etc. :curse: hahahaah! Um, if ONLY it was that easy.
Feb 22nd 2009, 7:12 am
#22
Reunited
Joined: Apr 2006
Location: Somewhere out there
Posts: 1,754
Re: someone hit Kai today
I personally would have decked her, 
so hats off to you for keeping your cool.
Of course when kids get together there are going to be issues which come up now and then, so here are a few golden rules which we need to keep in mind.....
If I like it, it's mine.
If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
If I can take it from you, it's mine.
If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
If it just looks like mine, it's mine.
If I saw it first, it's mine.
If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
If I am playing with something and I put it down, it's still mine
If it's broken, it's yours.
so hats off to you for keeping your cool. Of course when kids get together there are going to be issues which come up now and then, so here are a few golden rules which we need to keep in mind.....
If I like it, it's mine.
If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
If I can take it from you, it's mine.
If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
If it just looks like mine, it's mine.
If I saw it first, it's mine.
If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
If I am playing with something and I put it down, it's still mine
If it's broken, it's yours.
Feb 22nd 2009, 7:21 am
#23
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jun 2008
Location: oakville ON
Posts: 350
Re: someone hit Kai today
No matter what your child did, no one other than you is entitled to hit him and even you, on the bum only probably. The woman who did so has some serious anger management problems herself. It isn't for us here to pass judgment on your parenting style/skills. Suffice to say it is probably best that you put the incident behind you and move on.
Feb 23rd 2009, 1:16 am
#24
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Aug 2005
Location: South of Calgary
Posts: 13,378
Re: someone hit Kai today
Of course when kids get together there are going to be issues which come up now and then, so here are a few golden rules which we need to keep in mind.....
If I like it, it's mine.
If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
If I can take it from you, it's mine.
If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
If it just looks like mine, it's mine.
If I saw it first, it's mine.
If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
If I am playing with something and I put it down, it's still mine
If it's broken, it's yours.
If I like it, it's mine.
If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
If I can take it from you, it's mine.
If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
If it just looks like mine, it's mine.
If I saw it first, it's mine.
If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
If I am playing with something and I put it down, it's still mine
If it's broken, it's yours.
Feb 23rd 2009, 3:27 am
#25
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 15,883
Re: someone hit Kai today
I personally would have decked her, so hats off to you for keeping your cool.
Of course when kids get together there are going to be issues which come up now and then, so here are a few golden rules which we need to keep in mind.....
If I like it, it's mine.
If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
If I can take it from you, it's mine.
If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
If it just looks like mine, it's mine.
If I saw it first, it's mine.
If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
If I am playing with something and I put it down, it's still mine
If it's broken, it's yours.
so hats off to you for keeping your cool. Of course when kids get together there are going to be issues which come up now and then, so here are a few golden rules which we need to keep in mind.....
If I like it, it's mine.
If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
If I can take it from you, it's mine.
If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
If it just looks like mine, it's mine.
If I saw it first, it's mine.
If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
If I am playing with something and I put it down, it's still mine
If it's broken, it's yours.
Feb 23rd 2009, 7:03 am
#26
Happy in NB
Joined: Sep 2005
Location: Island View, New Brunswick
Posts: 2,020
Re: someone hit Kai today
Generally the only people who benefit when Lawyers are involved are the Lawyers.
Life is full of challenges and experiences and sometimes we have to take them on the chin and move on. I am not advocating weakness and constant turning of the cheek. But in this case I would advise you not to take it further and to move on. Kai will have learnt a little about hugging hard, and he will soon forget the actual smack.
Life is full of challenges and experiences and sometimes we have to take them on the chin and move on. I am not advocating weakness and constant turning of the cheek. But in this case I would advise you not to take it further and to move on. Kai will have learnt a little about hugging hard, and he will soon forget the actual smack.
Feb 23rd 2009, 7:04 am
#27
Happy in NB
Joined: Sep 2005
Location: Island View, New Brunswick
Posts: 2,020
Feb 24th 2009, 1:13 pm
#28
half a century
Joined: Mar 2008
Location: Sarf Lundun to East Van :)
Posts: 10,222
Feb 25th 2009, 2:48 am
#29
BE Enthusiast
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 604
Re: someone hit Kai today
Just an update, me and Kai are fine. Kai seemed to forget about it the next day.
The park is near his pre-school and we went yesterday at exactly the same time as the incident last week, didn't have a choice, Kai was going and that was it. No one was there.
Kai is great in pre-school and since that incident he has been fine around other kids. I don't know if it affected him in a good way??!?!
The park is near his pre-school and we went yesterday at exactly the same time as the incident last week, didn't have a choice, Kai was going and that was it. No one was there.
Kai is great in pre-school and since that incident he has been fine around other kids. I don't know if it affected him in a good way??!?!
Feb 25th 2009, 7:11 pm
#30
Logical & Hot Stuff
Joined: Nov 2007
Location: Ontario's Armpit
Posts: 19,815
Re: someone hit Kai today
Just an update, me and Kai are fine. Kai seemed to forget about it the next day.
The park is near his pre-school and we went yesterday at exactly the same time as the incident last week, didn't have a choice, Kai was going and that was it. No one was there.
Kai is great in pre-school and since that incident he has been fine around other kids. I don't know if it affected him in a good way??!?!
The park is near his pre-school and we went yesterday at exactly the same time as the incident last week, didn't have a choice, Kai was going and that was it. No one was there.
Kai is great in pre-school and since that incident he has been fine around other kids. I don't know if it affected him in a good way??!?!
