Linked-In "lady"
Sep 9th 2015 | 11:12 am
#31
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2014
Posts: 118
From: Ontario Canada
Re: Linked-In "lady"
What if the guy was gay? would it still be classed as sexist?
Sep 9th 2015 | 11:49 am
#32
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 0
Re: Linked-In "lady"
A vista of a mountain and lake would be stunning. It's really the subject or contents of a photo that would be stunning, not the photo itself - although there are exceptions like the boy on the beach. So it is really a comment on her looks, though not meant to be offensive. It's actually a compliment.
But so is a wolf whistle although most women don't want - nor should get - that sort of attention.
Where his position is relevant is that we live in a world where one has to be careful how one acts and what is said. We have a better awareness of word use and how things may be interpreted. Casual racism, sexism is no longer tolerated.
Maybe this hits the news more in the UK where sports TV presenters have lost their jobs and others have got into trouble for using outdated language like 'coloured' or some such.
But there was a case in the US recently where a TV news presenter was reprimanded for comments he made about a female fighter pilot.
There are legal ramifications in the use of potentially prejudicial language/behaviour.
A senior lawyer really should have greater awareness.
But so is a wolf whistle although most women don't want - nor should get - that sort of attention.
Where his position is relevant is that we live in a world where one has to be careful how one acts and what is said. We have a better awareness of word use and how things may be interpreted. Casual racism, sexism is no longer tolerated.
Maybe this hits the news more in the UK where sports TV presenters have lost their jobs and others have got into trouble for using outdated language like 'coloured' or some such.
But there was a case in the US recently where a TV news presenter was reprimanded for comments he made about a female fighter pilot.
There are legal ramifications in the use of potentially prejudicial language/behaviour.
A senior lawyer really should have greater awareness.
My wife doesn't see it as offensive or sexist, nor does a couple of female friends, suppose people don't all have the same definitions of what is and isn't offensive.
We need a book of rules so we know what to say, I'd have never thought a compliment would be offensive.
I don't compliment people and rarely even talk to people as I am not too keen on being around people, but seems best thing to do is not say anything beyond hi and bye to avoid potentially offending someone.
Last edited by scrubbedexpat091; Sep 9th 2015 at 11:54 am.
Sep 9th 2015 | 12:01 pm
#33
Muskoka, Ontario
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 3,045
Re: Linked-In "lady"
My wife doesn't see it as offensive or sexist, nor does a couple of female friends, suppose people don't all have the same definitions of what is and isn't offensive.
We need a book of rules so we know what to say, I'd have never thought a compliment would be offensive.
I don't compliment people and rarely even talk to people as I am not too keen on being around people, but seems best thing to do is not say anything beyond hi and bye to avoid potentially offending someone.
We need a book of rules so we know what to say, I'd have never thought a compliment would be offensive.
I don't compliment people and rarely even talk to people as I am not too keen on being around people, but seems best thing to do is not say anything beyond hi and bye to avoid potentially offending someone.
Sep 9th 2015 | 12:04 pm
#34
Account Closed
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 0
Re: Linked-In "lady"
"Nice haircut"
"you look nice today"
I wasn't offended. Those were based on looks and from female co-workers, so really is not clear why it's okay there, but the comment made in the original is not? If it's offensive to tell someone they look nice, or their photo looks nice, should be for all not just some.
Gay co-workers routinely said things like what this guy said, and female co-workers would do the same. Things like nice make up, nice hair.
I don't understand why a compliment of any sort is controversial, seems weird to me.
Suppose most here are not in the same life level as we are, and suppose that makes a difference, we are not well educated college graduates.
Last edited by scrubbedexpat091; Sep 9th 2015 at 12:12 pm.
Sep 9th 2015 | 12:10 pm
#35
limey party pooper
Joined: Jul 2012
Posts: 10,000
Re: Linked-In "lady"
Ok, the lawyer was being a bit creepy and should have known better, but the young lady could really have handled this better privately rather than publicly IMO. Definitely a case of pot, kettle.
Lawyer accused of sexism after complimenting barrister on 'stunning' LinkedIn picture - Telegraph
Lawyer accused of sexism after complimenting barrister on 'stunning' LinkedIn picture - Telegraph
Sep 9th 2015 | 12:18 pm
#36
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 28,998
Re: Linked-In "lady"
Female co-workers have said things like:
"Nice haircut"
"you look nice today"
I wasn't offended. Those were based on looks and from female co-workers, so really is not clear why it's okay there, but the comment made in the original is not? If it's offensive to tell someone they look nice, or their photo looks nice, should be for all not just some.
Gay co-workers routinely said things like what this guy said, and female co-workers would do the same. Things like nice make up, nice hair.
I don't understand why a compliment of any sort is controversial, seems weird to me.
Suppose most here are not in the same life level as we are, and suppose that makes a difference, we are not well educated college graduates.
"Nice haircut"
"you look nice today"
I wasn't offended. Those were based on looks and from female co-workers, so really is not clear why it's okay there, but the comment made in the original is not? If it's offensive to tell someone they look nice, or their photo looks nice, should be for all not just some.
Gay co-workers routinely said things like what this guy said, and female co-workers would do the same. Things like nice make up, nice hair.
I don't understand why a compliment of any sort is controversial, seems weird to me.
Suppose most here are not in the same life level as we are, and suppose that makes a difference, we are not well educated college graduates.
A compliment of any sort is not controversial. And while it may seem weird to you in the corporate world - such as where high profile lawyers work - the type of "compliment" this man made was inappropriate.
It doesn't matter what someone's education or life level (whatever that means) is. Complimenting someone you don't know, who is in a junior position to you, solely on their looks is inappropriate. Tell me how you think your wife would feel if some high ranking executive from the company she works for sent her an email saying "you look gorgeous today". I personally would find it offensive.
Sep 9th 2015 | 12:29 pm
#37
Dive Bar Drunk
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 8,671
From: Toronto
Re: Linked-In "lady"
There's a difference between "nice haircut" and "wow, that haircut makes you look smokin' hot!". Same as "you look nice today" is a whole lot different to "you look ****able today".
A compliment of any sort is not controversial. And while it may seem weird to you in the corporate world - such as where high profile lawyers work - the type of "compliment" this man made was inappropriate.
It doesn't matter what someone's education or life level (whatever that means) is. Complimenting someone you don't know, who is in a junior position to you, solely on their looks is inappropriate. Tell me how you think your wife would feel if some high ranking executive from the company she works for sent her an email saying "you look gorgeous today". I personally would find it offensive.
A compliment of any sort is not controversial. And while it may seem weird to you in the corporate world - such as where high profile lawyers work - the type of "compliment" this man made was inappropriate.
It doesn't matter what someone's education or life level (whatever that means) is. Complimenting someone you don't know, who is in a junior position to you, solely on their looks is inappropriate. Tell me how you think your wife would feel if some high ranking executive from the company she works for sent her an email saying "you look gorgeous today". I personally would find it offensive.
People are only interested in my body and accent.
I have so many wonderful anecdotes to share......
Sep 9th 2015 | 12:32 pm
#38
Account Closed
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 0
Re: Linked-In "lady"
There's a difference between "nice haircut" and "wow, that haircut makes you look smokin' hot!". Same as "you look nice today" is a whole lot different to "you look ****able today".
A compliment of any sort is not controversial. And while it may seem weird to you in the corporate world - such as where high profile lawyers work - the type of "compliment" this man made was inappropriate.
It doesn't matter what someone's education or life level (whatever that means) is. Complimenting someone you don't know, who is in a junior position to you, solely on their looks is inappropriate. Tell me how you think your wife would feel if some high ranking executive from the company she works for sent her an email saying "you look gorgeous today". I personally would find it offensive.
A compliment of any sort is not controversial. And while it may seem weird to you in the corporate world - such as where high profile lawyers work - the type of "compliment" this man made was inappropriate.
It doesn't matter what someone's education or life level (whatever that means) is. Complimenting someone you don't know, who is in a junior position to you, solely on their looks is inappropriate. Tell me how you think your wife would feel if some high ranking executive from the company she works for sent her an email saying "you look gorgeous today". I personally would find it offensive.
The original comment doesn't say she looks stunning, it says stunning picture, and that it's the best picture he has seen.
Nowhere does it say anything like "you are stunning" You are gorgeous"
That is just as benign as saying "you have a nice haircut" "You look nice today"
Seems too much these days, people look for ways to be offended where there really is nothing offensive being said.
The comment made in my view, my wife's view and 3 other people I have asked who are female have said it's not offensive, and they would not find it offensive, so it's unlikely there will be an agreement on this topic and will be split view.
Last edited by scrubbedexpat091; Sep 9th 2015 at 12:39 pm.
Sep 9th 2015 | 12:42 pm
#39
Dive Bar Drunk
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 8,671
From: Toronto
Re: Linked-In "lady"
Given that she has written published papers on forced marriage, rape and revenge porn which are clearly shown on her LinkedIn profile you'd know that it is not a person who would take a comment like that likely.
It wouldn't bother a lot of people but still not necessarily something you should be sending someone on a website that is meant as an exchange of business expertise.
Sep 9th 2015 | 12:50 pm
#40
.
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 20,188
Re: Linked-In "lady"
The problem is the person the comment was made too took offence.
Given that she has written published papers on forced marriage, rape and revenge porn which are clearly shown on her LinkedIn profile you'd know that it is not a person who would take a comment like that likely.
It wouldn't bother a lot of people but still not necessarily something you should be sending someone on a website that is meant as an exchange of business expertise.
Given that she has written published papers on forced marriage, rape and revenge porn which are clearly shown on her LinkedIn profile you'd know that it is not a person who would take a comment like that likely.
It wouldn't bother a lot of people but still not necessarily something you should be sending someone on a website that is meant as an exchange of business expertise.
Sep 9th 2015 | 1:08 pm
#41
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 14,227
Re: Linked-In "lady"
Now she's moaning like naff, saying her career's buggered because she made this public. HID has a pretty decent job and is also fit so she gets comments from older creeps a lot but she ignores them, knowing that she wouldn't touch them with a ten foot pole and most of them will be dead in a few years.
For a pair of supposedly clever lawyers, they both seem to be a bit thick.
Sep 9th 2015 | 1:14 pm
#42
.
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 20,188
Re: Linked-In "lady"
For him to put it in writing and her making such a big public deal. Surely there are other more pressing cases of injustice for her to sink her teeth into?
Sep 9th 2015 | 1:54 pm
#43
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 14,227
Re: Linked-In "lady"
I know. Given she writes about rape, forced marriage etc, this is what she decides to die on a hill for. Maybe she genuinely didn't expect this, but you'd think lawyers would know that nobody likes a grass.
Sep 9th 2015 | 2:17 pm
#44
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 2,040
From: Orton, Ontario
Re: Linked-In "lady"
As someone who worked as the only woman in a mechanical engineering design office in the 1980s, long before Political Correctness was a thing, and when you had to check no one was around before you bent to get something from the bottom of a filing cabinet, as an undefended butt was going to get slapped, I suspect I have become de-sensitised to this kind of 'sexist' statement. Personally I don't think it's offensive, but obviously she did and that is her right, and a privately sent reprimand should have been the way to go. Publicly calling him out over it seems to be more about attention seeking than anything else.
