Better still, dress up in a faux Satanist costume (Horns, pentangle etc) and invite them in for a 'chat'. Works wonderfully with Sunday morning Jehovah Witnesses.

That's a lot of effort to go to. "F*** off" is far less time consuming and can be quite satisfying.

Or TELEMARKETERS.

It might not be so clear to the non native english speaking canadians though (and thats about half of them innit?)

Ah, I forgot to mention the "F**k Off!" sign etched on the forehead in red ink.

I usually just tell them.

I'm usually biting a bat's head off at the time so it's difficult to speak coherently.

None of the people selling gas or electricity who came to our door in Toronto spoke enough English to understand "get the **** off my porch". I'd set the hose on them, just as if they were NDP campaigners.

Im guessing you wont have any of them to deal with at the new place at least

Almost worth the commute.

The only person who's come to the door unexpected since we've been there was a woman in pursuit of a labrador. I'd seen the dog go by and was trying to call it back not knowing that the magic word is "banana". The dog comes to the call of "banana". Why I cannot imagine.

No one told you the magic word was "banana"?


You must have been out of town that day.....

The dog people seem very nice, we went there for a barbecue and they invited us to ride on their land, but there's something off about calling out "banana" and the dog's name, D'Arcy. I wouldn't try there here, in Boystown.

Even better (if you don't have a satanist costume to hand)l, tell them that you go to a spiritualist church, that really upsets them. They told me I'd go to hell for trying to contact the dead. So I replied "Maybe it'll be a fun place to be" at which they walked away Mawhahaha!

Indeed you would.

But when they're telling you they're from the gas company and this will keep your prices low AND you're dealing with a crying 1-year old, I guess it wasn't easy...