Hi Guys
Have a look at this, amazing really, the Police Force has a gift shop!http://www.kolkatapolice.org/
The stuff they sell helps to pay for clinical attention for the officers, a great idea but you would have thought that they would get it free.
Am going to send off for some beer mugs.
Also this http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/south_asia/6932216.stm
Completely bananas
Regards
Tony P

Tony,

Where do you find this stuff?

Anyway i too am really impressed with the Kolkata Police Site......the banana story i started to read just as i sat down to lunch......thanks for that.

Do you think the mugs will come in one piece from India?
Heres Hoping.......mind you for all they cost its worth a chance.

Regards,
Remy

Hi Tony
Loved the Banana storey. Put me down for two mugs and some Christmas cards.

Old man

I still can't quite figure out how they will get this one to work:
TP

There is fight in the old one yet.
TP

You just know that this will be a winner
TP

What are parents thinking of?
TP

What sort of person has a pet like this?
TP

Hi Tony,

Ref crocodiles.

TDK should get one to take in the taxi, when going to the bank .

In order to upgrade the effectiveness of the deterrent ,TDK could train it beforehand with trigger words like "money" at feeding time.

Then if a robber jumps in the taxi and says "hand over your money"!



You can catch them on the banks of the mandovi/mapusa river.

They are appropriately called mugger crocodiles.

Or should that be anti - mugger (when appropriately trained).

Once trained, TDK should obviously avoid using the trigger word unthinkingly

For example, when out walking the crocodile, if approached by a beggar dont whatever you do say "sorry i haven't got any money on me at the moment"

In order to avoid this sort of occurence, the trigger word" money" should be replaced by a code word such as "contraceptives"

So , when the beggar approaches hand held out, TDK knowingly responds
"i am sorry i haven't got any contraceptives on me at the moment"

The beggar goes home and says to his wife, " i was in mapusa today and i approached a firang with a pet crocodile on a lead and for some reason they thought i was asking for sex"

regards
douglas

Hi Douglas
I don't very often but
TP

Hi Douglas,

There show all the "peepers" guests your real funny side.

Hi Noni,

I understand crocodiles have excellent hearing compared to most reptiles but they are tone deaf and for this reason there could occasionaly be communication difficulties between TDK and the crocodile, ( due to the different tones and inflections used in what to an indian crocodile, is a foreign language).

For this reason when in close proximity to the crocodile, any word that sounded even similar to the trigger word money should be avoided.

For example TDK shouldnt look fondly at the crocodile and say "give mummy a paw then"

regards
douglas

Hi Douglas,

Although i confess to having a soft spot for certain reptiles (such as Tony's friendly Aye aye), i'm not fully convinced that a mugger croc would be easy to train as a body guard (let alone the toilet training), not to mention the possible consequences of chatting to beggars about contraceptives

However, i will put it down as my plan B if i can't get hold of a local (human) bodyguard wala or possibly a trustworthy Bihari dakoit!

Regards TDK

Hi again Douglas,

I guess i should also avoid saying things like 'hand over the money honey' when i visit the freeholder (faithful croc at side) cos i just hate filling in those long police forms following croc attacks!

Hi TDK,

I suspect your visa doesnt cover you for training crocodiles either, so thats two offences you have committed so far. No wonder we are not wanted in goa.

regards
douglas