When Does Homesickness Kick in?
#31
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
Coming up on 8 years now. First 4 years looking back on it was honeymoon period. Now i just feel trapped here, knowing there's no way i'll ever be happy in the city i'm based. Kinda homesick but mainly due to fact i never built a life outside one person here, so now that i'm trying/having to do that i realise how much i miss the depth and complexity of our social strata back home. And how much of it is missing here. Things are bland here and i suspect i need more diversity, having spent the last 20 year s travelling...
#32
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
Coming up on 8 years now. First 4 years looking back on it was honeymoon period. Now i just feel trapped here, knowing there's no way i'll ever be happy in the city i'm based. Kinda homesick but mainly due to fact i never built a life outside one person here, so now that i'm trying/having to do that i realise how much i miss the depth and complexity of our social strata back home. And how much of it is missing here. Things are bland here and i suspect i need more diversity, having spent the last 20 year s travelling...
I have got to a point now (i have been here 7 and half years) that i dont really miss my social circle i had in the UK anymore, as i have a substansial one here.
I think my social circle was created out of being single, and doing what i wanted when i wanted, so you should be in a good position to do that now. Although i am a little tired of that lifestyle now, it would be nice to be settled.
#33
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
I think you need to start somewhere afresh with a potential to create a social circle, I moved to a city....well i call it a town where i didnt know a soul, i now have a very varied social circle of friends, it took time and you have to be open minded and easy going with who you meet at first (my attitude was any company was better than no company)
#34
Account Closed
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 0
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
Heck I have been here 12 years and still haven't managed to create a social circle, but then I never had friends at home either...lol... Never been one who could make friends.
#35
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
Take people at face value and not be judgemental unless you really cant put up with their personality, loud mouthed, blunt or arrogant, even then i found you can make exceptions if they have other qualities.
Im a pretty social kind of guy though so it depends on the individual too.
#36
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
What, Branston pickle? They sell it at Bulk Barn.
I never get homesick for the UK. Can't stand the place, glad I left. Went over for a visit a month ago and I caught a cold so that also lowered my opinion of the place even more if such a thing is possible. Brexit just confirmed my long-held belief that the British are the world's most opinionated people on subjects they know nothing about. Which worked quite well when they were prodding people with bayonets during the 19th century but it doesn't work now.
I think perhaps I used to miss going to the seaside which I cured by going to Victoria or Vancouver.
I get homesick for the US sometimes, Americans seem more sociable than Canadians for the most part.
I never get homesick for the UK. Can't stand the place, glad I left. Went over for a visit a month ago and I caught a cold so that also lowered my opinion of the place even more if such a thing is possible. Brexit just confirmed my long-held belief that the British are the world's most opinionated people on subjects they know nothing about. Which worked quite well when they were prodding people with bayonets during the 19th century but it doesn't work now.
I think perhaps I used to miss going to the seaside which I cured by going to Victoria or Vancouver.
I get homesick for the US sometimes, Americans seem more sociable than Canadians for the most part.
#37
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
Are Brits less sociable with you because you tell them what an awful place they live in and that they're so ignorant?
#38
BE user by choice
Joined: Oct 2010
Location: A Briton, married to a Canadian, now in Fredericton.
Posts: 4,854
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
Sometimes too it just feels like more of the bleeding same....you do your great big "1st" Christmas, Winter, etc, and then right around the corner comes another, and another, ad bloody infinitum....it's sometimes not Homesickness just a sort of "oh Godness" that kicks in.
Brits aren't all the same...we have lots of different 'sorts' in our nation which is why we act so differently, than heavens...how awful if we were all on schedule? The super thing is that a great big bell curve of people can and will adapt over time
Brits aren't all the same...we have lots of different 'sorts' in our nation which is why we act so differently, than heavens...how awful if we were all on schedule? The super thing is that a great big bell curve of people can and will adapt over time
#39
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
Sometimes too it just feels like more of the bleeding same....you do your great big "1st" Christmas, Winter, etc, and then right around the corner comes another, and another, ad bloody infinitum....it's sometimes not Homesickness just a sort of "oh Godness" that kicks in.
Brits aren't all the same...we have lots of different 'sorts' in our nation which is why we act so differently, than heavens...how awful if we were all on schedule? The super thing is that a great big bell curve of people can and will adapt over time
Brits aren't all the same...we have lots of different 'sorts' in our nation which is why we act so differently, than heavens...how awful if we were all on schedule? The super thing is that a great big bell curve of people can and will adapt over time
#40
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
I never missed 'home', 7 years in. On occasion I have wished I could have a good face to face natter with my sisters or a few close friends, but that is about it!
#41
Account Closed
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 0
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
You seem a friendly sort of guy to me. I found it was best to just get out there, pubs are always good to strike up a conversation, as long as you dont bring up politics or religion too soon! lol
Take people at face value and not be judgemental unless you really cant put up with their personality, loud mouthed, blunt or arrogant, even then i found you can make exceptions if they have other qualities.
Im a pretty social kind of guy though so it depends on the individual too.
Take people at face value and not be judgemental unless you really cant put up with their personality, loud mouthed, blunt or arrogant, even then i found you can make exceptions if they have other qualities.
Im a pretty social kind of guy though so it depends on the individual too.
#42
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Feb 2013
Location: BC, Canada
Posts: 3,874
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
Like Steve ........... I have never missed the UK
I found that 5 years of university meant that I had seriously moved on and beyond most of my friends from school, many who had left at 15 (bought out for £10 by parents) or 16 after GCEs and gone out to work.
They were, in some ways, more adult than I was at 22 or 23, and in other ways, I had more varied interests. There also is nothing quite like meeting a former classmate of the opposite sex on the street and stopping to chat, and realising that daggers are being directed at you by his female companion.
Sorry, honey, but I wasn't interested in him that way!!!!
But it meant that I found little interest in going back to my home town even during the time I was living elsewhere in England, except to see father and other relations.
Then we discovered in 1975 on our second visit back that our relations were interested in seeing us only if we visited them ......... we'd suggested renting a cottage near the sea for a week to give our toddler "beach time", and that the rellies could visit us. All owned cars and still drove, most were only in their 60s.
But ................ "No way, Jose" was the response.
We had to drive to them, having bored toddler in the car and meeting relations. Luckily, she wasn't too miserable!
By that time, we'd also found that most of our friends from university days had moved elsewhere, mainly to Canada or Australia, in the great exodus of the late 60s and early 70s. We're still in contact with those friends, at least with the ones who are still alive.
I think Canada is also a country of different "sorts", as Millie put it ................... and we know many of them! There is always something else to discover in this great country!
I found that 5 years of university meant that I had seriously moved on and beyond most of my friends from school, many who had left at 15 (bought out for £10 by parents) or 16 after GCEs and gone out to work.
They were, in some ways, more adult than I was at 22 or 23, and in other ways, I had more varied interests. There also is nothing quite like meeting a former classmate of the opposite sex on the street and stopping to chat, and realising that daggers are being directed at you by his female companion.
Sorry, honey, but I wasn't interested in him that way!!!!
But it meant that I found little interest in going back to my home town even during the time I was living elsewhere in England, except to see father and other relations.
Then we discovered in 1975 on our second visit back that our relations were interested in seeing us only if we visited them ......... we'd suggested renting a cottage near the sea for a week to give our toddler "beach time", and that the rellies could visit us. All owned cars and still drove, most were only in their 60s.
But ................ "No way, Jose" was the response.
We had to drive to them, having bored toddler in the car and meeting relations. Luckily, she wasn't too miserable!
By that time, we'd also found that most of our friends from university days had moved elsewhere, mainly to Canada or Australia, in the great exodus of the late 60s and early 70s. We're still in contact with those friends, at least with the ones who are still alive.
I think Canada is also a country of different "sorts", as Millie put it ................... and we know many of them! There is always something else to discover in this great country!
#43
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
I'm off back home at the end of the month, first time back in almost 2 years. It should be interesting.
#44
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
Maybe you're living in the wrong place??
We have almost complete recycling here ...... except if you live in an apartment. The managers are slow to get the separated containers and tenants seem to think someone else will do it.
Even condo owners are getting into it.
Internet shopping is common here, and more and more grocery stores are offering the service, and some have always offered "phone in your order, we'll fill it and deliver it".
I'm also not sure what you mean by "proper food". We certainly get proper food here .......... farm fresh veggies and meats, healthy breads, etc etc. Most of the English food I can no longer remember, or wish to remember! Like the overcooked veggies, well done meat, mushy peas, tripe and onions. Maybe the fact that I was a child in the 40s and 50s meant that I was never exposed to "junk" food ....... which in those days meant bought food of any kind.
As for getting nostalgic about a place that no longer exists ..............
5 of my female cousins emigrated to Australia with their families in the early 1960s. One never settled. We spent a lot of time with her in 1975/76, and she was longing to get back to Oldham, the Moors, etc etc.
She didn't remember how dirty the town was, how many of the mills were not working .............. and that had happened even by 1967 when I left.
Then they took a long service leave "home" in the early 1980s ................ and she finally realized that her idealised Oldham and the Moors no longer existed .......... and possibly never had!
She also realized her whole family was in Australia ....... but she insisted that her husband took her ashes back to England and spread them on the Moors after she died in 2003.
We have almost complete recycling here ...... except if you live in an apartment. The managers are slow to get the separated containers and tenants seem to think someone else will do it.
Even condo owners are getting into it.
Internet shopping is common here, and more and more grocery stores are offering the service, and some have always offered "phone in your order, we'll fill it and deliver it".
I'm also not sure what you mean by "proper food". We certainly get proper food here .......... farm fresh veggies and meats, healthy breads, etc etc. Most of the English food I can no longer remember, or wish to remember! Like the overcooked veggies, well done meat, mushy peas, tripe and onions. Maybe the fact that I was a child in the 40s and 50s meant that I was never exposed to "junk" food ....... which in those days meant bought food of any kind.
As for getting nostalgic about a place that no longer exists ..............
5 of my female cousins emigrated to Australia with their families in the early 1960s. One never settled. We spent a lot of time with her in 1975/76, and she was longing to get back to Oldham, the Moors, etc etc.
She didn't remember how dirty the town was, how many of the mills were not working .............. and that had happened even by 1967 when I left.
Then they took a long service leave "home" in the early 1980s ................ and she finally realized that her idealised Oldham and the Moors no longer existed .......... and possibly never had!
She also realized her whole family was in Australia ....... but she insisted that her husband took her ashes back to England and spread them on the Moors after she died in 2003.
Only thing I miss there is the chippy! (oh and my Mam & Dad of course).
#45
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Joined: Feb 2013
Location: BC, Canada
Posts: 3,874
Re: When Does Homesickness Kick in?
Oldham was still the dirty old mill town when I left for good in 1967. The mills were closing down, but clean up had not begun. We were last back there in 2001.
I went to school at Counthill, in the days when it was brand new, and that was great ............ on the top of a hill, only farms around it, and views for miles.