I see a thread in 6 months saying, we've made a massive mistake...

Emigrating is one long mind ****

I see that mutley_hound hasn't responded to all the replies yet, but there is a definite trend of ..... 6 months of winter does not a country make!

I fully agree.

It's your time in life now so don't allow the kids to dictate your long term future. Yes, for sure, you need to think of their educational and social needs, but also need to be assured that their education will not be any worse than they may receive in the UK. I think that's a no brainer!
Plus, as selfish as it seems (not!) you also need to think about your own future.
In a few years (it'll flash past!) they will have grown up and left home to start families of their own. Where would you rather be when that happens and later on in life when you retire?

Parents make the decisions as to what is best in the longer term for the family they created. The kids do not have anywhere near enough experience in life to drive your family's immediate future. After about a year, and a summer behind them plus new friends to catch up with over the next winter, they'll have settled in and the idea of returning to the UK will fade away. Canada will be come their life and they'll grow into Canadians.

If you head back to the UK now, you can bet they will start complaining about how the UK has changed and they miss Canada! That's kids for you. Then what will you do?

Hi
We moved over to Calgary in 2008 and after 3 months came back to the UK,teenage son was unhappy and that made me unhappy that why we came back,but was the worse think we did,we should off give it longer.
Since being back,son has said he wished we had stayed in Canada and we all see we needed to give it a proper go so we are trying again.
Maybe you should give it a bit longer...........really wish we had.

All the best in what ever you decide

Many, many thanks to all of you who have offered advice on this topic. I'm sure it's not the first time it has been raised, and i'm also sure it won't be the last. Firstly, we have not yet made any concrete decision as to whether we will be going back or not, at the moment it is just a thought. We realise that six months is not long enough, and prior to coming out, my wife and I both said that we would have to give it 12-18 months. The kids have not been arguementative or any real trouble, they just seem to be withdrawing into themselves more and more as time has gone on, which we feel is worse than if they threw tantrums. We haven't told the boys that we have had thoughts of going back, so it's not as if they are trying to force the issue. I'm sure a lot of the things that have been mentioned in this post will be of great use to others thinking of emigrating with teens. Once again, thanks to all of you for taking the trouble to post replies.

Gosh how much I agree with the other posters. Do please try a bit more time. I'm not sure that Canada will be the 'right' country for me, perhaps that one doesn't exist... but I KNOW it will give my child more chances in life, a better future, and that he WILL be happy. He just doesn't know he will be, because he hasn't moved yet and he will be encouraged, chivvied or brainwashed by me into feeling happy if necessary. Do your kids know what a lot or trouble and heartache this move has caused to you as a couple, for, what I suspect, is the desire to give your kids a better life?

Calgary has horrid winters, winter is a big problem for lots of people in Canada; wait for the winter to go. Canadians hate the winters too, they get depressed and suicidal in winter just like the rest of us. Six months of winter have caused you all distress, but don't throw the baby out with the bathwater in a knee-jerk reaction. Give it more time. Your kids deserve to be listened to, and their fears and unhappiness taken into account - but, you and your wife have a right to life too, and your needs and fears taken into account by the kids. It's a two way street when it comes to teenagers. They are old enough to realise that it isn't 'all' about them.

Hold your breath and your nerve and give it just that bit more time.

mutley, sorry, our posts crossed, I'm glad you are giving them a bit more time! Kids do bounce back! Best of luck.

Great! I hope it all swings around for your family. I'm sure it will after a summer behind you.

I know how difficult it is for teenagers to settle in a new country because I was in that situation myself when my parents moved to France from the UK. Not as big a move as crossing the Atlantic and some I know, but different language and very different culture.

Although I hung out with the local teenagers, and I became fluent in French, I was unhappy and resentful of being uprooted from my friends and life in the UK and also my beloved horse had had to be sold because of the move.

Also, my parents had moved to a house on a hill just outside of a village, but we were otherwise in the middle of nowhere and there was not a lot to do particularly as I wasn't driving at that point! We went on drives to the coast and explored other towns, but I was still unhappy there.

It wasn't the first time my parents had lived in France either, but they were there for about 7 years before they returned to the UK. They realised they missed their friends and that they were getting on age-wise so decided to re-establish themselves in the UK. Also, my parents were hit hard by the financial crash of the early 90s and that definitely impacted their life in France.

All I am saying is that I understand how your teenagers feel, it is a tough age to be uprooted as you are starting to find your independence and identity etc.

Hey guys,
Just wanted to say if your wife wanted to have a cuppa with a friendly ear, I would love to meet her.
Its definately tough the first 6 months out here and the winters can be long and hard, but my husband and I have been in Cochrane now for 5.5 years and absolutely love it!
Does your wife have any hobbies? I started playing in the ladies rec soccer here in town, and would never have tried that in the UK. And yet here its such a friendly bunch, and so much fun!
Please tell your wife, if she would like a cuppa and a chat sometime, I would love to meet her. We live in the East End of town.
Best wishes
Lucy

Yes, if only to make it feel like 6 years.