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I hate it even before we moved there.

I hate it even before we moved there.

Old Feb 15th 2020, 9:01 pm
  #31  
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

Originally Posted by Winterdiva View Post
We are moving out of the UK and Canada seems to be our best option..
Your "threads started" history shows a very clear focus on Canada, even different areas, and none anywhere else. That strongly suggest you've considered things carefully unlike those who just want out of the UK and look at "anywhere" to get away
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Old Feb 18th 2020, 3:41 am
  #32  
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

Hi, they way you are feeling is totally normal. The few months before I moved was the most stressful of my life. I had very good reasons for wanting to come but kept focusing on everything I was leaving behind, the amount that I had to do, the fear that it would work, I would like it etc etc. I had frequent anxiety attacks, didn’t sleep, cried at things that i would normally just breeze through.

We are still settling on, starting our job hunt etc in Canada but I almost immediately calmed down once I got on the plane. The excitement and adventure overtook the stress.

At my lowest when I was, like you, thinking about giving up on the idea and staying in the UK I would ask myself which I would regret more, moving and it not working and coming home or not moving at all. I always knew I would regret not giving it a go more, despite the stress.

Good luck with whatever you decide.
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Old Feb 18th 2020, 1:49 pm
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

Originally Posted by JaninaK View Post
At my lowest when I was, like you, thinking about giving up on the idea and staying in the UK I would ask myself which I would regret more, moving and it not working and coming home or not moving at all. I always knew I would regret not giving it a go more, despite the stress.
Honestly, no clue what I’ll regret more.
The job hunt thing is stressing me out big time. I’m reading awful stories everywhere. We aren’t expecting anywhere near our UK salaries, but I don’t think I’m prepared to drive taxis or stack shelves. Im feeling super guilty about pulling kids out of top grammars here, only to return a year or so later because we haven’t found work. There are jobs, we have lots of relevant experience. However, I cannot get Canadian experience without a Canadian firm hiring me.
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Old Feb 18th 2020, 4:02 pm
  #34  
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

Originally Posted by Winterdiva View Post
Honestly, no clue what I’ll regret more.
The job hunt thing is stressing me out big time. I’m reading awful stories everywhere. We aren’t expecting anywhere near our UK salaries, but I don’t think I’m prepared to drive taxis or stack shelves. Im feeling super guilty about pulling kids out of top grammars here, only to return a year or so later because we haven’t found work. There are jobs, we have lots of relevant experience. However, I cannot get Canadian experience without a Canadian firm hiring me.
If you have excellent salaries and your kids are doing well at top schools where you are, what is the pull to come to Canada? That reason may be what makes or breaks the move and the likelihood of successfully integrating and being content with your lot.

Unless you have professions that are in short supply in Canada you may have difficulty in obtaining a job initially. It's common for immigrants to have to take a step backwards in their careers, moving down in the level of job they have or sideways. It's not insurmountable but it's something you must be prepared for; you might luck out and get one of the first jobs you apply for when you are here - but it could also take you months to obtain one in your profession... that's where having a good amount of settlement funds is essential.

Perhaps write down the reasons for and against moving...
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Old Feb 18th 2020, 4:07 pm
  #35  
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

Originally Posted by Winterdiva View Post
Honestly, no clue what I’ll regret more.
The job hunt thing is stressing me out big time. I’m reading awful stories everywhere. We aren’t expecting anywhere near our UK salaries, but I don’t think I’m prepared to drive taxis or stack shelves. Im feeling super guilty about pulling kids out of top grammars here, only to return a year or so later because we haven’t found work. There are jobs, we have lots o f relevant experience. However, I cannot get Canadian experience without a Canadian firm hiring me.
I think your concerns are most definitely valid and, to be honest, I do struggle to understand why people with good jobs in the UK and kids would choose to move here without work, unless they have a huge appetite for adventure - which you say you don't have. I can understand it from some other parts of the world but not from somewhere like the UK. The only reasons you have stated on here for wanting to leave are that you have a small house and a long commute. There are small houses here too, the GTA is not cheap, and the traffic is terrible so even short distances can turn into a lengthy commute.

We came under the best possible circumstances - both had jobs that paid a lot more than our UK jobs - I was permitted to dictate my own working hours (becoming the first professional woman in the company to work part time), the move was fully financed by our company, including 6 months of rental accommodation, PR applications paid for, assistance of immigration lawyer - who actually came to airport when we arrived just in case there were any issues, our flights were paid for, removals cost paid for, they gave us extra cash to help us replace things like electronics that wouldn't work here. All four of us were keen to make the move and were fully behind it and we all loved it right from the start. Even with all of that in our favour - it still wasn't easy. If one family member is not sure about the move then I can't even begin to imagine how dreadful that could get.

There are lots of places in the UK with less expensive housing, and shorter commute times, if those are your only reasons for wanting to move. If there are other reasons then, as suggested above, you need to really think about them and if you decide that they are worth the upheaval then focus on that and try to keep negative thoughts under control.
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Old Feb 18th 2020, 9:01 pm
  #36  
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

Originally Posted by Siouxie View Post
Unless you have professions that are in short supply in Canada you may have difficulty in obtaining a job initially. It's common for immigrants to have to take a step backwards in their careers, moving down in the level of job they have or sideways. It's not insurmountable but it's something you must be prepared for; you might luck out and get one of the first jobs you apply for when you are here - but it could also take you months to obtain one in your profession... that's where having a good amount of settlement funds is essential.
Perhaps write down the reasons for and against moving...
Moving sideways or even a level down is fine too. We have a good amount of settlement funds - enough to comfortably last a year or two. I'm just worried about something I cant put my finger on. Perhaps the fear of not finding jobs.
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Old Feb 18th 2020, 11:54 pm
  #37  
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

Originally Posted by Winterdiva View Post
Moving sideways or even a level down is fine too. We have a good amount of settlement funds - enough to comfortably last a year or two. I'm just worried about something I cant put my finger on. Perhaps the fear of not finding jobs.
If you are career orientated (I think that's a bit of a nonsense for computer people but, hey ho) then the smart thing Is to take a contract. That way you get some cash flow and local experience and you can leave after six months or a year without it being a blip on the resume. If subsequently a question arises about having taken a position off your career trajectory "new country, wanted to get the measure of the workplace culture without committing" is more or less true and is credible. If otoh, you take a permanent job and it's a disaster, you'll be forever having to explain why you left, or were fired, after a short period.

I am, of course, a pimp, so I have a dog in this fight, but that's how I see it.
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Old Feb 19th 2020, 2:53 pm
  #38  
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

Originally Posted by dbd33 View Post
If you are career orientated (I think that's a bit of a nonsense for computer people but, hey ho) then the smart thing Is to take a contract. That way you get some cash flow and local experience and you can leave after six months or a year without it being a blip on the resume. If subsequently a question arises about having taken a position off your career trajectory "new country, wanted to get the measure of the workplace culture without committing" is more or less true and is credible. If otoh, you take a permanent job and it's a disaster, you'll be forever having to explain why you left, or were fired, after a short period.

I am, of course, a pimp, so I have a dog in this fight, but that's how I see it.
Do you have any contacts in Waterloo area dbd33?
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Old Feb 19th 2020, 3:56 pm
  #39  
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

Originally Posted by HGerchikov View Post
I think your concerns are most definitely valid and, to be honest, I do struggle to understand why people with good jobs in the UK and kids would choose to move here without work, unless they have a huge appetite for adventure - which you say you don't have. I can understand it from some other parts of the world but not from somewhere like the UK. The only reasons you have stated on here for wanting to leave are that you have a small house and a long commute. There are small houses here too, the GTA is not cheap, and the traffic is terrible so even short distances can turn into a lengthy commute.

We came under the best possible circumstances - both had jobs that paid a lot more than our UK jobs - I was permitted to dictate my own working hours (becoming the first professional woman in the company to work part time), the move was fully financed by our company, including 6 months of rental accommodation, PR applications paid for, assistance of immigration lawyer - who actually came to airport when we arrived just in case there were any issues, our flights were paid for, removals cost paid for, they gave us extra cash to help us replace things like electronics that wouldn't work here. All four of us were keen to make the move and were fully behind it and we all loved it right from the start. Even with all of that in our favour - it still wasn't easy. If one family member is not sure about the move then I can't even begin to imagine how dreadful that could get.

There are lots of places in the UK with less expensive housing, and shorter commute times, if those are your only reasons for wanting to move. If there are other reasons then, as suggested above, you need to really think about them and if you decide that they are worth the upheaval then focus on that and try to keep negative thoughts under control.
This 100%. I don't live in the GTA & have only visited but the thought of moving there with expensive housing, long commutes etc, would make me question whether it is worthwhile. Add in uncertainty over career and I definitely wouldn't do it. There is an old adage that many of the things that expats look for in Canada - bigger houses, the fabled "quality of life" can be achieved by moving from the South East of England to the North (or West or Scotland). Such a move comes with less cost, less risk and should have less career impact. Of course, if you want to leave the Uk for reasons, or want to move to another country for reasons, than fair enough,but be prepared (as I think the OP is) for bumps in the road on your journey!

FWIW I moved to a small City in Canada in an isolated province purely for reasons of the heart - Mrs AX is from Newfoundland. That makes gives a different perspective on the challenges (& there were a few over the past 15 years) we faced.

AX
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Old Feb 26th 2020, 2:06 pm
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

I can't imagine making this move without having an overwhelming positive feeling towards it.

Finding work is tough. Not as in "hard work but you'll get there". Many immigrants leave again because they can't find a job in their field, no matter their experience and qualifications.

When you have a job holiday allowance sucks. Depending on industry, long hours. Weekends.

It's expensive and far to fly to anywhere else to get away.

You have to make a whole new social network. Even in Toronto, as diverse as it is, this isn't London or New York for making friendship groups. It takes a long time to slot in. Canadians have their networks from school days, early careers.

I'm happy here. Doubled down and recently bought a house. But I was (and am) super excited and positive about the move, then I deal with the blows as they come
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Old Feb 28th 2020, 5:00 am
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

In my opinion you should not nother to go. This is due to the fact that it will be obvious to employers that you excel negative vibes and they don't really like that.
Very hard to find work as you will have no 'canadian experience' Masters degrees don't count I was told and I have two. Experience don't count as its not canadian and they think its different and needed.
The country is so large that each Province feels like another country, laws can vary as well as attitudes.
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Old Mar 7th 2020, 2:43 am
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

Originally Posted by Winterdiva View Post
I was ok up until now. I’m beginning to hate the idea of moving to Canada. Everything sounds so expensive. Landlords don’t even respond to us, employers don’t respond (inspite of having loads of RELEVANT experience and masters degrees). Houses are bigger but GTA is the biggest bubble in North America! I’m scared of buying. We are moving (to Waterloo area) to find local jobs and avoid the commute. We got a bit carried away by bigger houses too. Shouldn’t we be just moving to Leeds or Manchester? I don’t know. We’ve been planning this move for nearly 4 years. We sold our house and moved into a rented place last year. We told our landlord we are leaving. This house is already on the market. I am pulling my kids out of a top grammar school here. I don’t know what I’m doing really.

should I just abort this move?? That won’t solve the issues we currently have (long commutes and small house). I am posting here for some hand holding please.
Sometimes it is not you just "being negative" or having "last minute jitters"

Trust your instincts.
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Old Mar 7th 2020, 2:23 pm
  #43  
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

Originally Posted by Winterdiva View Post
I can’t write here about our reasons for choosing Canada as they are very specific and hence potentially identifying.
That makes it hard for any well-intended outside observer, whether Canadian or Brit, to offer any useful advice to you in a thread entitled "I hate it even before we moved here".

Can you give us any non-identifying hint about why you chose that path? And given that you don't want to reveal much else, what information / advice / counsel / consolation are you actually looking for on this thread?


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Old Nov 17th 2020, 3:13 am
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

So, what happened?
Did you come to Canada?
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Old Nov 17th 2020, 7:41 pm
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Default Re: I hate it even before we moved there.

https://britishexpats.com/forum/cana...scotia-935151/

If she's wanting a mortgage, seems like she is here.........
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