Five years and homesickness increasing..
May 29th 2019, 2:43 pm
#46
Pea Brain
Joined: Jun 2005
Location: TBD
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Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
I'm of a similar view. I travel to the UK frequently and read some of the same media (plus frothing right wing loonacy for reasons of balance and history :-)) Aside from the not being able to afford a house, I think moving back would be relatively straightforward in terms of integrating back life.
Last edited by R I C H; May 29th 2019 at 2:47 pm.
May 29th 2019, 2:53 pm
#48
BE Forum Addict
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 3,363
Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
I think this is great advice. ….. Most people will find there that there is no "back" to move back to, because what you left when you emigrated wasn't just "a place" it was also "a time", and things haven't remained frozen in time while you were away. Never mind the recent political upheavals in the UK and whether you think they are good or bad, since you left people have moved, married, divorced, friends and relatives have aged and some may have died, or their circumstances changed, for better or worse; shops have closed, houses and flats built, roads changed.. The fabric of life is in constant flux and if you return expecting things to be just how you left them, you are likely, in most cases, to be disappointed. Which is why, to borrow a phrase from the Australians, the phenomenon of the "ping pong pom" exists - people who "move back" are highly likely to re-emigrate because they failed to rediscover the Britain that they left.
I play in an 'old timers' soccer team and about 2/3 of them are from the UK and I'm one of the ones whose been here the longest (since age 17) while others have only been here a few years. Two of them are in the UK 6 or 7 times a year for work as they work in Canada for UK based companies. Although they do speak fondly of the UK, none would move back to where in the UK they were from...east London, Glasgow, south Wales, the "Midlands' somewhere, mainly as many have married Canadian partners and have kids who don't have a strong british affinity or they couldn't afford to and many have said they feel a stranger in their home towns or their aging parents no longer live in the place they grew up in.
One of these guys has even go full assimilation and has signed his kids up for baseball..now that is commitment
May 29th 2019, 3:39 pm
#49
Muskoka, Ontario
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 3,045
Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
Obviously all of this is true but I wonder to what extent it's changing. I visit the UK annually or better, I read the British Libtard media. I don't think I'm hugely out of touch with the way of life there and I don't think it would be a shock to move there; I still wouldn't be able to afford a spectacular house. I'm in a different situation to people who moved to Australia by boat and had news only by letter for thirty years. "Cheap" flights and the internet have shrunk the world.
Lots of people have suggested more frequent flights home but given that a long haul flight is equivalent to two years worth of driving and is up there as the biggest change people can make to fight climate change, I actually don’t see that as viable option. So if I was going to get grounded somewhere with easy alternative access to many places to visit; Canada sure as hell wouldn’t be it.
Last edited by Tirytory; May 29th 2019 at 3:41 pm.
May 29th 2019, 3:40 pm
#50
Tea Drinker
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Kamloops, BC
Posts: 5,387
Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
Only thing I don't buy from Costco is their shoes, never really see anything I like and unfortunately they don't sell Dr Martens.
May 29th 2019, 3:52 pm
#51
Oscar nominated
Joined: Jan 2008
Location: Moncton, NB, CANADA
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Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
May 29th 2019, 4:00 pm
#52
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Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
I think that’s half the problem here is that I feel out of step with everyone in Muskoka. Here I am, worried that my children and grandchildren face famine, war and possible extinction and that we need to act now and people here worry about their houses/truck/boat/snowmobile/seadoo/cottage etc. I think to clarify I embraced this initially but I’ve changed over the last couple of years and now find it all shallow I guess for want of a better word. Dbd33 said on another thread, to loosely paraphrase that culture and family is what you exchange for stuff. I know stuff isn’t making me happy.
May 29th 2019, 4:03 pm
#53
Muskoka, Ontario
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 3,045
Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
I hate to generalize but unfortunately I've noticed this mindset is very common among baby boomers - this doesn't apply to all boomers, but it seems to be the most common with that particular group - replacing emotional needs with money and stuff. You might want to look to moving to an area with a lower average age of the population, there are parts of Canada where people don't think this way. You could also see if there are any citizen volunteer groups for things like the environment that you seem to be passionate about, you might meet some more likeminded people there.
May 29th 2019, 4:05 pm
#54
Joined: Dec 2001
Location: Dixie, ex UK
Posts: 52,448
Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
May 29th 2019, 4:13 pm
#55
Muskoka, Ontario
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Joined: Aug 2013
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Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
If those are your concerns they sound like reasons to stay in Canada, where there is ample room and many natural resources, both mineral and agicultural, rather than head (back) to a region that started two world wars and still has plenty of national, regional, and ethnic tensions, is too crowded to grow enough food to feed everyone, and the population density will make the population much more vulnerable to a flu epidemic or other pandemic disease that we are over due for.
May 29th 2019, 4:23 pm
#56
Assimilated Pauper
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: Ontario
Posts: 40,018
Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
That is true, and should be added to the Pro list, but right now I don’t think most Canadians care enough to change, and given that we have they say 11 years to overhaul our infrastructure to bring our emissions down then Canada is a huge way from this. They do say, that Canada will face a huge migration of people because of climate change.
May 29th 2019, 6:05 pm
#57
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 2,113
Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
I don’t think I would be out of touch at all. In fact, I think i’m probably more ideologically suited to the UK and “some” of the movements there (not the Brexit one to clarify). I think that’s half the problem here is that I feel out of step with everyone in Muskoka. Here I am, worried that my children and grandchildren face famine, war and possible extinction and that we need to act now and people here worry about their houses/truck/boat/snowmobile/seadoo/cottage etc. I think to clarify I embraced this initially but I’ve changed over the last couple of years and now find it all shallow I guess for want of a better word. Dbd33 said on another thread, to loosely paraphrase that culture and family is what you exchange for stuff. I know stuff isn’t making me happy.
Lots of people have suggested more frequent flights home but given that a long haul flight is equivalent to two years worth of driving and is up there as the biggest change people can make to fight climate change, I actually don’t see that as viable option. So if I was going to get grounded somewhere with easy alternative access to many places to visit; Canada sure as hell wouldn’t be it.
For me personally they were, the push from the UK was the early death of my parents my sister and other family member and friends starting their own families, I knew I could never relive the happy family times I enjoyed once, I was part of the old family which really no longer existed, life had moved on and I hadn't, still being single I felt didnt fit in anywhere anymore, so that was my push.
The pull was Canada;s lifestyle....after enjoying a number of vacations in Canada, I felt i fitted in very well....it suited me and I thats all that mattered, everyone around me had what they wanted, and a new life, i wanted mone, and to get away from memories of the past, believe it or not, I was leaving to get away from good memories not bad! I needed to feel like I could enjoy life again....so that was the pull.
After living here for a while, like you I had amassed stuff....stuff I could never have or never use in the UK, so this became my focal point in the absence of family, fully embracing Canada's way life, and I knew at the same time I wasnt missing anything in the UK, everytime I got a little homesick, I reminded myself of my push from the UK...... I know that doesn't help you, our lives are polar opposites, but you see how it works for some and not for others..... I have a good idea how you feel...maybe the allure of stuff pulled you in the first place, but you just didnt have a good enough of a push from the UK.
Its hard to know what to do in a situation like this, as some posters have said, some expats never reallly belong in either place once they have emmigrated, a cross we all have to bear, we eternally live mid Atlantic! I hope you come to a happy decision.
May 29th 2019, 6:19 pm
#58
Muskoka, Ontario
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Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
May 29th 2019, 7:45 pm
#59
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Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
I think thats your reason right there, you left your happy life for someone else's desires. Thats tough.....as one of you is going to be unhappy, I assume you husband is happy with his new life? would he be unhappy in the UK? I guess it comes down to who would be the most unhappy in which country, and up to the other to compromise for them.
May 29th 2019, 8:17 pm
#60
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Location: BC, Canada
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Re: Five years and homesickness increasing..
Tirytory ..............
Do you think you are in the wrong place in Canada?
The concerns you state are so very similar to the concerns that are expressed AND things being done about, here in BC, especially in the southern half.
Why do you think there is all this "problem" with John Horgan, according to the Alberta government, if not concern for the environment, carbon usage, etc etc etc.
Despite what the central Canadian media says, I believe that more people than not support Horgan's position, especially when they really look at what economic benefits accrue from having the pipeline built and in action.
Work? That comes to an end as soon as the pipeline is built, and most workers will not be moved from "their" area to the next as it seems likely that several stretches will be built at the same time, and anyway, workers in every area along the route are expecting to get work.
No problem with damage from pipeline breaks or tanker spills? Just read the scientific reports, and then look at media reports of pipeline and tanker spills.
Cheaper gas at the gas stations?? NO gas for cars will be in the pipeline (according to Transmountain itself), it will be shipping crude and bitumen to the coast for shipping overseas. Then the refined gas can be shipped back here
Maybe it is where you are living that is the problem.
Would your husband be interested in looking at a move to the southern half of BC?
Do you think you are in the wrong place in Canada?
The concerns you state are so very similar to the concerns that are expressed AND things being done about, here in BC, especially in the southern half.
Why do you think there is all this "problem" with John Horgan, according to the Alberta government, if not concern for the environment, carbon usage, etc etc etc.
Despite what the central Canadian media says, I believe that more people than not support Horgan's position, especially when they really look at what economic benefits accrue from having the pipeline built and in action.
Work? That comes to an end as soon as the pipeline is built, and most workers will not be moved from "their" area to the next as it seems likely that several stretches will be built at the same time, and anyway, workers in every area along the route are expecting to get work.
No problem with damage from pipeline breaks or tanker spills? Just read the scientific reports, and then look at media reports of pipeline and tanker spills.
Cheaper gas at the gas stations?? NO gas for cars will be in the pipeline (according to Transmountain itself), it will be shipping crude and bitumen to the coast for shipping overseas. Then the refined gas can be shipped back here
Maybe it is where you are living that is the problem.
Would your husband be interested in looking at a move to the southern half of BC?