Mornin ND

Thanks everyone. I am a bit more together this morning and will be seeing my friend this afternoon.

ann m
I kind of expected the preparation to be an emotional time. We had our party at home and when we have had parties in the past we always cater together. This time she said that she would be there at lunchtime and she didn't turn up. I did the food myself (for 70 people) and when she came in the evening she didn't say why she hadn't come earlier and I didn't ask.

She usually loves catering for parties so that was to be kind of "our time" where there were not lots of others around. I am sure if she had been there in the day she wouldn't have felt so bad in the evening.

Still. You can't turn back the clock. I love my friend, but I have always known that she is "high maintenance" so I probably should have expected this. However, I am still going to work at staying friends and hopefully she will be out next summer to visit.

Thanks again.

All the best DNS,
You have to do what you feel happy with, I really hope it works for you....
Charlie

Destination,

Dont leave without trying to sort it out. You will regret it later on.
You obviously are very upset and at a loss too over your friend otherwise you woulndt have put a post here.
If it doesnt end on a positive note then you leave with sadness at the loss of a good friend but you also leave knowing you tried.

Hope it works out for you

Hi DNS

I kind of understand what you are going through, although my story is a little bit different.

Just remember your friend is still there and still wants to be your friend. She is just going through a very rough patch at the moment, as are you. It is very difficult to move away from friends and family in any walk of life, but i am sure you and she will be okay.

Just do not give up and please do not do what i did and shut all friendship out of your life. It is a very lonely feeling, when you do not have anyone to talk to......

I lost my best friend to cancer fifteenyears ago and I wasn't there for her when she passed away. I have always regretted this. I have never really had any close friends since and now find it really hard to make friends.

I hope i will be able to make new ones in Nova Scotia, when i get there. I am sure you will too, but try not to give up entirely on your best friend. It is hard and painful and it hurts but you have to get on with your life and hope that she understands.

Hope you feel better and things work out

Emmjay

I am sorry for rambling, but your message made me think too much

Aww big hugs dns, i am sure that you will do whats right and if your freind isnt
willing to make things right before you leave that is HER loss, you cannot do anymore afterall , i am sure they will be many people when you move only too pleased to have YOU as a freind xx

She would understand if she was a true friend. Her resentment at the fact you are leaving and subsequent reaction and attitude toward you only serve to highlight how selfish she is.

You will make new friends. Friends with funny accents.

I'm still really tight with all of my true friends back home and keep in touch loads. Others I would have considered close are not there any more- the move has only highlighted to me how they weren't true friends anyway.

The only thing I have to be careful about now is talking too much about how much I love being here. That can lead to problems, especially as they are still stuck on that rotting island.



Peace.

AAAAAAAAAhhhhhhhhhh.....not again.

I am feeling crap again.

I called my friend to see if we could go somewhere tomorrow with the kids seeing as the weather has been so nice.

She said that she couldn't make it as she would be having a lie in after the GIRLS NIGHT that she is having at her house. The one to which I haven't been invited.

To top it all my husband is the one who has been roped in to give her husband a lift into town to meet his mates for a night out (so that she can have her girls night), and tomorrow he is spending the day there working on their extension FOC to get some stuff finished before we move. I will be at home sorting out the house and packing on my own.

I am really trying not to get uptight with her as we are leaving in a weeks time. We took the whole family out bowling the other day as a bit of a treat from us hoping that a nice time together will help things along. I thought that things were better but now I'm not so sure. If it were anyone else I would just walk away, but we grew up together like sisters and I just want to make things right.

What more can I do?

I just want to say - She cares about you and this is hitting her hard and she doesn't know how to deal with it and she is scared she will lose you forever.

My very good friends were great, happy for us, just goodbye tears in the last days, no stress, no guilt - nothing. And that's what I have had from them since we moved - nothing, despite several phone calls, letters, e-mails and Christmas cards. One friend does send the 'forward on' emails but the other really close friend I have not heard a peep out of since the day we moved.

I've just seen you last post, it seems as though your friend is being a little unfair and I can see why your upset, your friend will regret some of her actions, i'm sure. Keep you chin up

I think i would have to get her to one side and ask her out right what the problem is and ask her why she is been so 'off' with you, good way to get things off your chest plus she can tell you why she acting like she is,if that dosnt work i'm afraid i would just walk away and concentrate on your family and your new life in canada. xx

Er, how would she feel if you had a girls night and you hadn't invited her?

This is ceasing to be your problem as you have tried your best. It is definitely her problem as she is beginning to behave badly......ask yourself, would you behave like she is at present?

F$ck 'em.

3.46 am today 4.42 pm today What happened to the expected meet up this afternoon? Did she call it off in preparation for her girls night?

If so, it's beginning to sound as if she might be trying to make a point. Not very good timing I fear.

I am all for making allowances for her feelings.....but she is a grown woman, there comes a time when she will just have to 'suck it up!'

Sorry to sound so harsh, but she should be making the most of the time you have together not spoilling it by acting like a child.

I really do feel for you, it's such a waste of energy.

hugs

Linda

I think it's her way of dealing with her loss....she may have not gone the right way abut it...but it's her way of coping with the distance between you...maybe it's an immature 'coping mechansim' she has, but this is reparable...it's not easy as quite often friends, dear friends are much closer than family...it will work out.