absent son
Jul 31st 2010 | 11:53 pm
#16
Thread Starter
not wired right
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 871
From: NB ... nearer to keanu than i was!
Aug 1st 2010 | 12:26 am
#17
Beep
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 8,311
From: Here
Re: absent son
The one way ticket would seem to show he's keeping his cards close to his chest. To me, it seems like he's using this visit as a trial, and if it doesn't work, he'll not stay. If it does, then great for everybody.
When i was his age i rarely showed my cards to friends and family, just in case it didn't work out. Plus i didn't want to build my hopes up, just in case.
Bloody teenagers are useless.
Last edited by el_richo; Aug 1st 2010 at 12:57 am.
Aug 1st 2010 | 12:34 am
#18
Thread Starter
not wired right
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 871
From: NB ... nearer to keanu than i was!
Re: absent son
Well you never know.
The one way ticket would seem to show he's keeping his cards close to his chest. To me, it seems like he's using this visit as a trial, and if it doesn't work, he'll not stay. If it does, then great for everybody.
When i was his age i rarely showed my cards to friends and family, just in case it didn't work out. Plus i didn't want to build your hopes up, just in case.
Bloody teenagers are useless.
The one way ticket would seem to show he's keeping his cards close to his chest. To me, it seems like he's using this visit as a trial, and if it doesn't work, he'll not stay. If it does, then great for everybody.
When i was his age i rarely showed my cards to friends and family, just in case it didn't work out. Plus i didn't want to build your hopes up, just in case.
Bloody teenagers are useless.
Aug 1st 2010 | 5:15 am
#19
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 9,707
Re: absent son
Hi
It depends, if your or your spouses TWP is for a job in NOC A,B or O then he is eligible for a work permit in Alberta (This only applies to Alberta) see: http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/resourc...2010/ob122.asp
We are leaving the UK for Alberta in october and wish too that we were all going together. My eldest daughter is 21 and wants to stay here with her fiance, which I hate the idea of, but hey, we cannot choose their partners for them can we! My son is 19,and we are going over on the PNP scheme, meaning he will not be able to work until we are permanent residents (unless anyone can advise me otherwise)??? he currently has a full time job here in the UK, so he said that he wants to go onto our application, but will come every 3-4 months until we are permanent, by which time he can find work. I am hoping that he will be allowed to do this and it wont mess up our application. Does anyone have any experience of this? Our youngest will obviously come with us as she is just 6, but she will miss her brother and sister terribly. By the sounds of your 18 year old, he has got a one way ticket, so he is obviously going to give it a go and see how he feels, fingers crossed for you 
Aug 2nd 2010 | 3:09 pm
#20
Banned
Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 19,878
From: SW Ontario
Re: absent son
For 18 months I tried (unsuccessfully) to persuade my son to be on my application as my dependant. The usual excuses were given - didn't want to leave friends, job, girlfriends, didn't know anyone, etc.
For the last 3 months prior to putting my application in I explained very carefully and tactfully that this was an opportunity of a lifetime. I told him that just because he was on my application that did not mean he had to come to Canada, in fact he could "land" and leave again and make his mind up over the next 3 years. I told him that, whilst he was happy to remain in England at that time that things could change; that there was a vast country to explore and a new beginning to be made if he felt he wanted to be here at some point. I told him he would be stupid (ok, not very tactful) to turn down the opportunity!
I also told him that should he decide not to be on my application he would have to remain in England as I would not be able to sponsor him.
One month before his 22nd birthday he decided to be on my application, and I submitted it 6 days before his 22nd birthday (the cut-off).
Things did change...
Five years later and we finally got our PR this year - he landed in February.
He cannot wait to get here, is excited (albeit a little apprehensive) about coming to live permanantly in Canada and is moving here in September - aged 27.
Put your son on your application, get him to land (maybe a bribe of an all expences paid holiday in Canada to get him here, lol) and then he can make his mind up.
Don't take no for an answer!!
Edit: As to your son acting up due to possible feelings of resentment - I concur. My son was the same - felt "abandoned" when I moved to Canada... even went around telling my husbands relatives that I had abandoned him (always in a joking manner of course) - he had obviously forgotten that he was planning on moving abroad himself when I sold up. He now "forgives" me he says! (and yes, I still feel as guilty as hell... that is why I am so happy and relieved that he is moving here!)
Hope your visit is a really happy and constructive one !
For the last 3 months prior to putting my application in I explained very carefully and tactfully that this was an opportunity of a lifetime. I told him that just because he was on my application that did not mean he had to come to Canada, in fact he could "land" and leave again and make his mind up over the next 3 years. I told him that, whilst he was happy to remain in England at that time that things could change; that there was a vast country to explore and a new beginning to be made if he felt he wanted to be here at some point. I told him he would be stupid (ok, not very tactful) to turn down the opportunity!
I also told him that should he decide not to be on my application he would have to remain in England as I would not be able to sponsor him.
One month before his 22nd birthday he decided to be on my application, and I submitted it 6 days before his 22nd birthday (the cut-off).
Things did change...
Five years later and we finally got our PR this year - he landed in February.
He cannot wait to get here, is excited (albeit a little apprehensive) about coming to live permanantly in Canada and is moving here in September - aged 27.
Put your son on your application, get him to land (maybe a bribe of an all expences paid holiday in Canada to get him here, lol) and then he can make his mind up.
Don't take no for an answer!!
Edit: As to your son acting up due to possible feelings of resentment - I concur. My son was the same - felt "abandoned" when I moved to Canada... even went around telling my husbands relatives that I had abandoned him (always in a joking manner of course) - he had obviously forgotten that he was planning on moving abroad himself when I sold up. He now "forgives" me he says! (and yes, I still feel as guilty as hell... that is why I am so happy and relieved that he is moving here!)
Hope your visit is a really happy and constructive one !
Last edited by Siouxie; Aug 2nd 2010 at 3:18 pm.
Aug 2nd 2010 | 8:26 pm
#21
Forum Regular
Joined: Feb 2009
Posts: 105
From: United Kingdom
Re: absent son
Hi
It depends, if your or your spouses TWP is for a job in NOC A,B or O then he is eligible for a work permit in Alberta (This only applies to Alberta) see: http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/resourc...2010/ob122.asp
It depends, if your or your spouses TWP is for a job in NOC A,B or O then he is eligible for a work permit in Alberta (This only applies to Alberta) see: http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/resourc...2010/ob122.asp
Thank you so much for that advice...He actually works as a chef in a hotel although he has never trained at college or got any qualifications..would the list still apply in this case?? He could get good references
Aug 3rd 2010 | 3:27 am
#22
Thread Starter
not wired right
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 871
From: NB ... nearer to keanu than i was!
Re: absent son
For 18 months I tried (unsuccessfully) to persuade my son to be on my application as my dependant. The usual excuses were given - didn't want to leave friends, job, girlfriends, didn't know anyone, etc.
For the last 3 months prior to putting my application in I explained very carefully and tactfully that this was an opportunity of a lifetime. I told him that just because he was on my application that did not mean he had to come to Canada, in fact he could "land" and leave again and make his mind up over the next 3 years. I told him that, whilst he was happy to remain in England at that time that things could change; that there was a vast country to explore and a new beginning to be made if he felt he wanted to be here at some point. I told him he would be stupid (ok, not very tactful) to turn down the opportunity!
I also told him that should he decide not to be on my application he would have to remain in England as I would not be able to sponsor him.
One month before his 22nd birthday he decided to be on my application, and I submitted it 6 days before his 22nd birthday (the cut-off).
Things did change...
Five years later and we finally got our PR this year - he landed in February.
He cannot wait to get here, is excited (albeit a little apprehensive) about coming to live permanantly in Canada and is moving here in September - aged 27.
Put your son on your application, get him to land (maybe a bribe of an all expences paid holiday in Canada to get him here, lol) and then he can make his mind up.
Don't take no for an answer!!
Edit: As to your son acting up due to possible feelings of resentment - I concur. My son was the same - felt "abandoned" when I moved to Canada... even went around telling my husbands relatives that I had abandoned him (always in a joking manner of course) - he had obviously forgotten that he was planning on moving abroad himself when I sold up. He now "forgives" me he says! (and yes, I still feel as guilty as hell... that is why I am so happy and relieved that he is moving here!)
Hope your visit is a really happy and constructive one !
For the last 3 months prior to putting my application in I explained very carefully and tactfully that this was an opportunity of a lifetime. I told him that just because he was on my application that did not mean he had to come to Canada, in fact he could "land" and leave again and make his mind up over the next 3 years. I told him that, whilst he was happy to remain in England at that time that things could change; that there was a vast country to explore and a new beginning to be made if he felt he wanted to be here at some point. I told him he would be stupid (ok, not very tactful) to turn down the opportunity!
I also told him that should he decide not to be on my application he would have to remain in England as I would not be able to sponsor him.
One month before his 22nd birthday he decided to be on my application, and I submitted it 6 days before his 22nd birthday (the cut-off).
Things did change...
Five years later and we finally got our PR this year - he landed in February.
He cannot wait to get here, is excited (albeit a little apprehensive) about coming to live permanantly in Canada and is moving here in September - aged 27.
Put your son on your application, get him to land (maybe a bribe of an all expences paid holiday in Canada to get him here, lol) and then he can make his mind up.
Don't take no for an answer!!
Edit: As to your son acting up due to possible feelings of resentment - I concur. My son was the same - felt "abandoned" when I moved to Canada... even went around telling my husbands relatives that I had abandoned him (always in a joking manner of course) - he had obviously forgotten that he was planning on moving abroad himself when I sold up. He now "forgives" me he says! (and yes, I still feel as guilty as hell... that is why I am so happy and relieved that he is moving here!)
Hope your visit is a really happy and constructive one !
i will follow your advice though it will allow him to keep his options open!
i bet you cant wait though for your son to turn up!!!
