What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

My son was kicked (maliciously) in the arm last week by his best friend of three years, who just 'flipped out'. The incident happened at school during lunch time on the Oval.

It was witnessed by lots of other children and the boy in question admitted to kicking my son; coupled by the fact he was in the school office complaining of the pain in his foot! My son was sitting on the school oval and his mate just turned on his heel and kicked him full on just below the elbow, breaking his arm.

If this happened to your son, what punishment would you expect to be dished out (from the school) to the child who did the kicking?

Just interested.

TIA,

Jules

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

How old are the boys.?

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

13 :o

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

I would expect at least a suspension and a letter of apology from the child. My daughter had her phone stolen at school a few weeks ago and that is what the child got, 3 days suspension and had to write to my daughter. For violence I would expect at least that. Have the parents been in touch with you? Has the boy called S to apologise at all?

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

What she said ^^

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

OK.My youngest is turning 13 next week.If he broke someones arm he would be in serious trouble.I would expect the school to suspend him for a week and then to be given serious punishment at home.Have the parents been called in to discuss the issue.I would be wondering why two best friends had such a fall out.Are they speaking now.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

I agree, suspension and apology letter, at the least. More than three days though, if theft gets three days. You'd think physical violence gets more of a punishment.

I hope his parents have been in touch with you at least. I mean, breaking someone's arm is a pretty serious injury.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

and another thing if you don't get any joy from the school I would be threatening to call the police, it is assault at the end of the day and you have plenty of witnesses. Should put the wind up their backside!

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

Thanks for your replies.....

No contact all all from the child or the parents (and we know them well; he was my son's best friend for heaven's sake and we have had meals with them and the kids have has sleep overs etc. Only the other weekend, my OH took the pair of them to the Motor show).

The boy has been gloating about his two day suspension from school over FB and was outside the school on Friday to walk his girlfriend home (despite his parents banning him from FB for a few days). His parents were livid at the school for suspending him.

He's been chosen the represent the school in a prestigious event in Sept; they have not stopped him participating.

The Head of Middle School phoned me on Friday to ask 'how would I feel if my son was given a detention if it was found that he 'antagonised' his friend?' Can you antagonise someone into breaking an arm? It wasn't as if they were toe to toe; my son was sat down.

I'm really angry and hurt :(

Jules x

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

I never understood suspension as a punishment.

I dreamed of one everytime I did something wrong at school but only ever got detention. :frown:

However, for breaking your son's arm - what the other posters have said.

Doesn't sound like the headmaster is handling it very well. Surely if your son was antagonising the other kid, a broken arm is punishment enough, let alone a detention on top.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

That's so frustrating! The fact that the school is not taking this seriously and the parents refuse to acknowledge what has gone on would also make me consider getting the police involved. Sure, the school and parents might have this "oh, boys will be boys," attitude but we're talking broken bones here. Assault, with witnesses. And the fact that the young man is laughing about it and thinking it's no big deal--well, he's learning that you can injure someone, with very little consequences, and it's all a big joke. Can't wait to see what kind of fights he gets into at 15 or 18.

The fact that his parents are ticked at the school is just pathetic. If my kid broke someone's arm, my anger would not be directed at the school.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

That's what I said! He's missing out on being in the soccer finals and he'll be in plaster for his birthday - I think he's been punished enough.

My son was actually standing up for his mate's girlfriend. His mate was being rough with her and he told him to leave her alone and go and toss a ball around if he wanted to play rough as he'd end up hurting her.

Jules

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

if someone kicked you and broke your arm whilst you were sitting down no matter what you said to them the police would arrest them for assault so why is this different because it happened at school?

at 13 this boy knows what he did is wrong
call the police now!

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

I know. It is GBH and they don't seem at all bothered!

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

Perhaps a visit from the local police might be in order.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

To me it sounds like he is getting away with murder with his parents.They are too easy on him.I would be deleting his fb account and banning him from the computer for a month. Plus allowing him a gf at 13,please.:frown:I would also be coming down hard on the school.My friendship with the parents would be done with.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

My OH asked the teacher how she would feel if the child had attacked one of the teaching staff - she said she'd me mortified.

Why does it not seem to bother her as much that it happened to my son whilst in her care?

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

Call the cops. If the school is not taking this seriously, then they will when the fuzz are involved.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

To not even pick the phone up and speak with us, I find completely unforgivable!

Their son used to call our home number 10+ times a day to arrange Playstation games etc, but they can't even call to say sorry or find out how bad the break is?! Unbelievable!

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

Think I may have to for my own peace of mind :(

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

If this happened at my and Northernbird's kids' school I'm pretty sure the boy would have been expelled so fast his head would still be spinning...

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

Katie had her phone stolen by another year 8 boy a few weeks back and the school were very good in dealing with it.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

My daughter was bullied last year on fb and she hasnt even got an account on it.One of her so called friends decided to have an ignore E......,day.I was devastated when I found out.The girl was very sorry and wrote a letter of apology to me.She then wanted to be my friend on fb.:frown:I never heard a word from the parents.The school investigated it but I dont believe that she was punished enough.She was still on fb the day after.My daughter forgave her.I havent.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

It's a Private School, so I would have expected more, I must admit.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

They're good like that.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

FB is such a horrid thing that our kids have to contend with. It's one thing to have things said behind your back, totally different to have it written in black and white and comments encouraged from all your peers.

My son was being 'interviewed' by the Middle School head today. I've told him not to take any sh*t and stand up for himself.

I will back him all the way.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

I guess you never know how good / bad they are until you have to experience the 'sharp end' as a parent.

My eyes have been opened, I can tell you.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

You need to see if there is an official school policy document that covers this type of thing, or grievances that you can take higher than the principal.

I'd be expecting suspension, banned from prestigious competition and a letter of apology. Anything less I'd threaten the school with police involvement.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

It is a difficult thing when it involves cyber bullying because the schools can do very little about things that occur outside of school time. We have had lots of instances of it at the school I work in. I am not condoning facebook bullying but it is hard for a school.

In this instance when it involves violence on school grounds in school time then I am sorry but the police would have to be called.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

How would you feel if they threatened to punish your child? Unbelievable, isn't it?

We have told the school in no uncertain terms that he shouldn't still be kept on the team - sets a really bad example to the pupils and do you really want someone who is capable of that representing your school?

I'm shocked that they didn't do this immediately, tbh.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

I appreciate its hard for the school.I would have been much happier though if the parents had picked up the phone to discuss it with me.I would have been mortified and disgusted if either of mine were capable of such a thing.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

I agree, it isn't good.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

I hope you get it sorted. I would be expecting alot more from the school.Btw ,speak to the head and not the vice principal.Dont be fobbed off.I hope your sons arm recovers and he can get back to normal.:fingerscrossed:

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

Thanks. I'll see what the Middle School Head has to say to him today......

Jules x

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

Absolutely go to the police. Also, if the little toerag is skiting about it on FB then get some screen shots of his pages and take them to the cops with you.

More parents should go to the police with hard issues like this one - and insist on some action.

Good luck and hope your son's arm heals quickly!

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

Suspensions don't work, 9 times out of 10 the shits want time off school so they play up and the school gives them just what they want. Internal suspensions do work though, the kids are in school, learning (in theory) but not allowed break time or to see their mates.

However in this case expulsion should have been the way to go, straight off. As for keeping him participating in this event, nah, should be kicked off that immediately.

If the head has done nothing after speaking to your son definitely call the police. It's outrageous that the parents have done nothing but maybe a visit from the law would make them understand how serious this is. Maybe they're too embarrassed but given that they're friends, that reason shouldn't apply.

Make a fuss, don't let it go.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

Suspensions don't work, 9 times out of 10 the shits want time off school so they play up and the school gives them just what they want. Internal suspensions do work though, the kids are in school, learning (in theory) but not allowed break time or to see their mates.

However in this case expulsion should have been the way to go, straight off. As for keeping him participating in this event, nah, should be kicked off that immediately.

If the head has done nothing after speaking to your son definitely call the police. It's outrageous that the parents have done nothing but maybe a visit from the law would make them understand how serious this is. Maybe they're too embarrassed but given that they're friends, that reason shouldn't apply.

As for suggesting your son be reprimanded for telling his mate not to bully the girlfriend, the school needs to be told just how wrong they are.

Make a fuss, don't let it go.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

Agreed. Assuming the story the Op has been given by her son is 100% accurate, then it seems to be an unprovoked attack, occasioning actual bodily harm. It's a serious assault and should be treated as such.

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

I trust his account of the story. I think we can all tell when our kids are trying to pull the wool over our eyes.

All the Head of Middle school had to say to him today was 'will you be OK if X comes back to school tomorrow? You're not frightened or intimidated by him?'

Er, no - he was his best mate. Would just like more justice than 2 days off school going out to lunch with his Mum and playing on the PS3....... :blink:

Re: What punishment would you expect from a school?
 

Thanks for your view.

Having no family support here to use as a sounding board, it's nice to be able to canvass others' opinions (and left off a little steam ;) )

Jules