Toxic people
Jun 6th 2006, 6:42 am
#16
Fighting my corner
Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Adelaide, South Australia
Posts: 11,948
Re: Toxic people
Crikey, this thread reads like an episode of Emmerdale! :scared:
Jun 6th 2006, 10:07 am
#17
Joined: May 2006
Location: in the Sydney asylum
Posts: 20,690
Re: Toxic people
Originally Posted by tum
Does anybody else know 'toxic people' :scared:? Like family members or friends?
You know, they just take and take and think they're the best, know the best and can never be at fault?
Just had my dad visiting and feel drained
Anybody have any creative or serious solutions?
Thanks (my balloon is empty
, but just typing this makes me feel better, won't lose one night's sleep though 
)
You know, they just take and take and think they're the best, know the best and can never be at fault?
Just had my dad visiting and feel drained
Anybody have any creative or serious solutions?
Thanks (my balloon is empty
, but just typing this makes me feel better, won't lose one night's sleep though )I had a father in law like this,I remained friendly and polite but would leave if he pissed me off too much or go out for a walk if at our house, got quite fond of him in a strange way and cared for him when he died. You will feel bad if you cut yourself off completely but they do take gentle hints like "I find this subject upsetting lets talk about something else" and if subject not changed say sorry have to go or got to get this from shops anything to stop you exploding then come back when calm and talk about what you are happy to talk about. worked for me.
Jun 6th 2006, 10:28 am
#18
Bloomin' well done it!!!!
Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Adelaide!!!!!
Posts: 689
Re: Toxic people
Originally Posted by katsmajic
I have 2 brothers who come under this heading...whilst hubby and i were away on our 1st real holiday together without kids they decided to 'borrow' hubbys car..they wrote it off.(and blew it up).refused to pay for it, the police couldnt persue it & insurance refused to pay as we had given 'implied' consent to one brother that if his car broke down he could use hubbys to pick us up from the airport.. they said that i was their sis and he was my hubby what was mine was theirs to use/abuse and therefore hubbys stuff was mine for them to use/abuse too...scary bit is that one is in 30's and other late 20's...not teenagers...they also decided to entice my 14year old (then 13) to go away with them for weekend away but they didnt tell me they had him and son didnt have his mobile on him...took 7hours and police involvement for them to admit they had my son...as i grew frantic because they said they hadnt seen him...
imagine my absolute horror last week when my mum informed me one brother is moving to OZ in October...im soooo glad Australia is so big!
imagine my absolute horror last week when my mum informed me one brother is moving to OZ in October...im soooo glad Australia is so big!
xRachx
Jun 6th 2006, 10:52 am
#19
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Apr 2005
Location: Western burbs, Melbourne
Posts: 2,260
Re: Toxic people
My brother and his wife most definitely are....always know better than anyone else, are always right, and everyone else exists to improve their life, but would not offer a lifevest to a drowning person.
My FIL died and with H being an only child/relative had to sort everything out. So we flew to UK and I had to work remotely during the night, and sort our estate during the day (H was busy sorting house). We worked flat out. Brother only called to say ' what tools can I have, from your FIL's garage?'. Then as H and I are running through the airport, he phoned to tell me that I 'had not spend enough time visiting our mother'. We were arranging a funeral for ***** sake, and running ourselves ragged (and during that time we had my mother stay at FIL's house for a week).
Lately my mother has been ill. His wife phoned to say my mother would never walk again. Cue me panicking, phoned hospital, and the nurses called my mother to the phone. When I mentioned to SIL about giving exaggerated information which is hard to deal with 15,000kms away, she ended up shouting at me for 'not appreciating her help'
I could go on...but I will not bore any more, although typing this out is very theraputic!
(H, sister, sister's partner, and kids do not have contact with my brother- I am the lucky 'chosen' one!!!)
My FIL died and with H being an only child/relative had to sort everything out. So we flew to UK and I had to work remotely during the night, and sort our estate during the day (H was busy sorting house). We worked flat out. Brother only called to say ' what tools can I have, from your FIL's garage?'. Then as H and I are running through the airport, he phoned to tell me that I 'had not spend enough time visiting our mother'. We were arranging a funeral for ***** sake, and running ourselves ragged (and during that time we had my mother stay at FIL's house for a week).
Lately my mother has been ill. His wife phoned to say my mother would never walk again. Cue me panicking, phoned hospital, and the nurses called my mother to the phone. When I mentioned to SIL about giving exaggerated information which is hard to deal with 15,000kms away, she ended up shouting at me for 'not appreciating her help'
I could go on...but I will not bore any more, although typing this out is very theraputic!
(H, sister, sister's partner, and kids do not have contact with my brother- I am the lucky 'chosen' one!!!)
Jun 6th 2006, 6:04 pm
#20
destination Cairns
Thread Starter
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 1,839
Re: Toxic people
What a stories 
, but ok, you can't change those people (I tried ) so you have to change yourself in a way. Although calling from the other side of the world and telling bluntly the exaggerated news on your mother is . This most tear your heart out.
And those brothers, ....they're not worth the 'title' to me. Especially the part about taking your son.
Although I must say this topic and all your reactions also put things in perspective for me, it's nice to know you're not alone.
Miranda
, but ok, you can't change those people (I tried ) so you have to change yourself in a way. Although calling from the other side of the world and telling bluntly the exaggerated news on your mother is . This most tear your heart out. And those brothers, ....they're not worth the 'title' to me. Especially the part about taking your son.
Although I must say this topic and all your reactions also put things in perspective for me, it's nice to know you're not alone.
Miranda
