strange attitude...
#1
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 257
strange attitude...
HI
last week I went 'home' to Germany and was very surprised , if not slightly takem aback by some of the attitudes I encountered regarding our emigration plans.
One person ( not family) actually said that if I keep moving around and don't settle , there was a danger that people would not take me seriously anymore !!??
I replied that I was settled, having been married to the same man for 22 years and having 4 kids with him How settled can you get. What's place got to do with it? I cannot imagine living in the same place all your life as if that was the be -all and end -all. of course I hope that we will settle in Oz, but there is no guarantee, so I can't answer questions like ' but what if Australia doesn't work out for you?'
Still not quite sure what that is meant to mean' not being taken seriously'...You don't move a family across the world and not be serious !
Just found that a very strange thing to say...it was a bit hurtful though coming from someone close to me, but there you go.
Emigration clearly throws up a lot of emotions!
Mrs ozbaz
last week I went 'home' to Germany and was very surprised , if not slightly takem aback by some of the attitudes I encountered regarding our emigration plans.
One person ( not family) actually said that if I keep moving around and don't settle , there was a danger that people would not take me seriously anymore !!??
I replied that I was settled, having been married to the same man for 22 years and having 4 kids with him How settled can you get. What's place got to do with it? I cannot imagine living in the same place all your life as if that was the be -all and end -all. of course I hope that we will settle in Oz, but there is no guarantee, so I can't answer questions like ' but what if Australia doesn't work out for you?'
Still not quite sure what that is meant to mean' not being taken seriously'...You don't move a family across the world and not be serious !
Just found that a very strange thing to say...it was a bit hurtful though coming from someone close to me, but there you go.
Emigration clearly throws up a lot of emotions!
Mrs ozbaz
#2
Re: strange attitude...
A lot of people use their own values and perception of what they consider to be normal to measure up you, quite incorrectly and usually in some sense to justify their own decisions. For example, apparently its a real shame according to some of our friends that my wife and I are not having kids, whereas we could think of nothing worse.
Don't take it to heart, smile and enjoy your life
Don't take it to heart, smile and enjoy your life
#3
Account Closed
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 3,821
Re: strange attitude...
Yep, know where you are coming from.. according to some family members, we deserve all that we get for not returning home for a family funeral (despite the actual family member insisting, before he died, that we most certainly do not!).. apparently we are heartless..
*shrugs shoulders*
ah.. what can you do?
Em x
*shrugs shoulders*
ah.. what can you do?
Em x
#4
Re: strange attitude...
Damned if you do and damned if you don't Em.
I decided when I turned 40 that I was not going to live my life trying to make anyone happy except ME. If others are positively affected by my decisions then great. If not then tough shit. I'm happy, my husband is happy and my children are doing fine, thanks. Everyone else can bite me.
I decided when I turned 40 that I was not going to live my life trying to make anyone happy except ME. If others are positively affected by my decisions then great. If not then tough shit. I'm happy, my husband is happy and my children are doing fine, thanks. Everyone else can bite me.
#5
Re: strange attitude...
HI
last week I went 'home' to Germany and was very surprised , if not slightly takem aback by some of the attitudes I encountered regarding our emigration plans.
One person ( not family) actually said that if I keep moving around and don't settle , there was a danger that people would not take me seriously anymore !!??
I replied that I was settled, having been married to the same man for 22 years and having 4 kids with him How settled can you get. What's place got to do with it? I cannot imagine living in the same place all your life as if that was the be -all and end -all. of course I hope that we will settle in Oz, but there is no guarantee, so I can't answer questions like ' but what if Australia doesn't work out for you?'
Still not quite sure what that is meant to mean' not being taken seriously'...You don't move a family across the world and not be serious !
Just found that a very strange thing to say...it was a bit hurtful though coming from someone close to me, but there you go.
Emigration clearly throws up a lot of emotions!
Mrs ozbaz
last week I went 'home' to Germany and was very surprised , if not slightly takem aback by some of the attitudes I encountered regarding our emigration plans.
One person ( not family) actually said that if I keep moving around and don't settle , there was a danger that people would not take me seriously anymore !!??
I replied that I was settled, having been married to the same man for 22 years and having 4 kids with him How settled can you get. What's place got to do with it? I cannot imagine living in the same place all your life as if that was the be -all and end -all. of course I hope that we will settle in Oz, but there is no guarantee, so I can't answer questions like ' but what if Australia doesn't work out for you?'
Still not quite sure what that is meant to mean' not being taken seriously'...You don't move a family across the world and not be serious !
Just found that a very strange thing to say...it was a bit hurtful though coming from someone close to me, but there you go.
Emigration clearly throws up a lot of emotions!
Mrs ozbaz
#6
Account Closed
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 3,821
Re: strange attitude...
Damned if you do and damned if you don't Em.
I decided when I turned 40 that I was not going to live my life trying to make anyone happy except ME. If others are positively affected by my decisions then great. If not then tough shit. I'm happy, my husband is happy and my children are doing fine, thanks. Everyone else can bite me.
I decided when I turned 40 that I was not going to live my life trying to make anyone happy except ME. If others are positively affected by my decisions then great. If not then tough shit. I'm happy, my husband is happy and my children are doing fine, thanks. Everyone else can bite me.
Yep.. I am getting to the point where I don't actually have any need nor inclination to go back either.. I was actually pretty angry at first, then my Mother had a bit of a go at me for taking it to heart.. she's great like that!
Em x
#7
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,872
Re: strange attitude...
Damned if you do and damned if you don't Em.
I decided when I turned 40 that I was not going to live my life trying to make anyone happy except ME. If others are positively affected by my decisions then great. If not then tough shit. I'm happy, my husband is happy and my children are doing fine, thanks. Everyone else can bite me.
I decided when I turned 40 that I was not going to live my life trying to make anyone happy except ME. If others are positively affected by my decisions then great. If not then tough shit. I'm happy, my husband is happy and my children are doing fine, thanks. Everyone else can bite me.
#8
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,872
Re: strange attitude...
I suppose alot of people assume that when you get married (or live defacto)and have kids,thats pretty much time to "settle down"and stay put for most of your life?Well sometimes it does'nt work out like that does it?Well not for everyone anyway!Some people envy my life,some would hate the idea of moving as much as we have but who cares!At the end of the day its our lives and we can live it exactly how we want!You have to do whats best for you and your family.
#9
Re: strange attitude...
We had some really silly things said to us too, mostly about spiders and snakes. One person even tried to scare our 7 year old!! Plus some hurtful stuff, like if you leave this town we won't have time to keep in touch with you. Like their lives were so exciting...
You know what, now it's funny. They are still there and they are doing the same things they've done for the past 40 odd years.. dare say they will until they die...
So chin up and follow your instincts.
You know what, now it's funny. They are still there and they are doing the same things they've done for the past 40 odd years.. dare say they will until they die...
So chin up and follow your instincts.
#10
Re: strange attitude...
Some really great replies on here!
Live your own life Mrs Ozbaz & don't worry that others can't see what great experiences you are all having!
Live your own life Mrs Ozbaz & don't worry that others can't see what great experiences you are all having!