daunted

Hello again...hope you all had/having a great Christmas. Tonight I have been pondering the oncoming year and realising that in reality it's not going to be much different than the one just ending from a financial point of view. This in turn got me thinking ....... Board? rent? what ever you want to call it...how much (if any) do your stay at home off spring contribute? I would love to say that it wasn't necessary but I'm on my own and struggle constantly.
DD is 20, Uni student, living at home, 2 part time jobs, claims youth allowance. Her only real out goings are $40 per week car payment and related expenses but she does buy her own clothes. She has also managed to save enough money to go to Europe next year travelling extensively. She currently pays me $50 a week, which includes everything. (she does cook often and does all her own laundry)
DS has just finished year 12 and about to start a traineeship. He will be earning $400 a week and other than topping up his mobile phone has a moped to run. He has a part time casual job that is very casual to say the least. He wont be doing this once he starts his traineeship. He currently isn't paying anything as he has only just finished high school. As from next week I won't be receiving Family Assistance. Neither will I be receiving Child Maintenance from his dad. This is what has prompted me to assess the balance in the house.
I work full time and have little or no disposable income at the end of each fortnight. I certainly don't have any savings for a holiday. Whilst I would love for money not to be an issue in our house, it is and as neither of them plan to leave home very soon (I would miss them terribly!) I think it is only fair that they muck in. There's gotta be a life lesson in there somewhere too hey?
Just to clarify...........both of them are happy to contribute I just don't know what is fair to ask of them

Sherlock Holmes

Do they turn the lights off?

$100.00 a week I reckon. (Each).

RedDragon2008

My parents started with 20% of net income

It went to 30% when I started earning more than them

The percentage works best because while they study their income can fluctuate depending on available hours etc.

It also starts to give them a sense of part of their wage does go and getting used a a percentage after necessities and fixed costs makes life more realistic.

daunted

no they leave the damned things on

Thankyou

daunted

Mmmm I like the idea of % of net income. like you say it allows for variation in their income

carolinephillips

Yes, charge them a percentage- but make it above a base rate, as you will still need a guaranteed sum even if they don't earn very much, and it will be an incentive for them to actually earn something- 20% of $400 is $80, but if there is only $50 coming in due to them not doing as much work, then you get $10, which doesn't buy many beans. If you have, say $50 for both as a base rate and then the percentage on top, at least you will get a minimum of $100 per week. Maybe a rate of 10% on top of the base would be fair?

Gibbo

My uncle came up with a formula when my husband died, one third net income for board, one third spending and one third savings. Thought it was a good starting point for discussion, although I don't think we ever really stuck to it.

eddie007

It's not only fair... It's right.... For a parent to struggle when they have young adults with high levels of disposable income living in their homes using their electricity/gas /food is is not right.....

It's part of parenting... To teach responsibility and to encourage independence by enlightening them about the "real" world...

The "costs" imposed on grown up children by parents who allow them to live at home in No way reflect the realities of independent living... But they do give them a taste of what it will be like.....

Giving them a false impression of economic wealth at a young age doesn't help them in the long term......

Go ahead and take some rent and board from them.... Share details about the household income and expenditure... Teach them about the REAL world....

daunted

Thanks everyone...you have all given some good advice.

I am thinking perhaps 25% of net income, minimum weekly payment $50 each up to maximum of $150 per week. Does that sound reasonable to you?


I have informed them both that when I am home next weekend we will be sitting down and sorting it all out. To their credit they are very happy to talk it all out together Thanks again

ozzieeagle

We could well be into a cultural difference here.... I've half an idea that it's quiet common for Aussie's not to charge their student/young adult kids rent.

Which means although it was the norm in the UK when I was growing up and appears to now... they could be out of kilter with their peers.

All of my adult kids have baulked at paying rent at home claiming their friends dont. I still managed to get rent out of them, but at a much lower rate than I would have at first. Hence tread carefully forget the 33pct (unless your prepared to tide them through any bad times) and go for the 80 buck figure.

Just my opinion of course.

I need to research this a little more closely and not just go on what my kids have told me.... I do know that none of the parents at my workplace charge their adult kids rent.... but their kids are doing things like buying houses and saving for more an doing them up etc etc.

Even our single mum neighbour freind doesn't charge her fully working 20 yo daughter.

daunted

Thanks ozzie -it's always good to hear the opposite side of the equation. I have also worked with locals who don't take any 'rent' off their adult kids....unfortunately that isn't really an option for mine if they choose to live at home. Last thing I want to do is to force them to feel they have to leave home but I cannot physically afford to keep paying the mortgage, all the house hold bills and filling the cupboards with food...thank fully they are mature enough to accept that.
I have asked them to think about what they think is fair/affordable in their opinion and then we will use that as a starting point. If they can show they are saving instead of just wasting their money I am more inclined to accept a lower weekly amount as ultimately I want them to be saving for their own future so they are never in the same predicament as I am

eddie007

Buynthem a packet of condoms and show them how to use them, then they won't.... apologies... Totally flippant comment.....

I understand where you are coming from with the saving thing.... BUT I would be expecting them to save some of their money ONCE they have paid their bills... Saving for their future is all well and good... But on your dime? You should be going into less struggling mode right now....


As for Aussies not taking board from their adult kids... I reckon one of two things is going on there.... Either I mix wih a lower socioeconomic group of Aussies who simply can't afford to continue to allow their grown up kids to freeload whilst they count every cent.... OR... You're succumbing to the age old..."all my friends parents....let them smoke in the house/stay out all night/don't make them wash up arguement..... ...... If it's the latter you should have dealt with that aged TEN......

Hebe

From my own person experience and talking to other parents I have come to the conclusion that the parents who don't charge their children are usually those from an ethnic background.

I think it is important to charge, even if you don't use it and save it for them (without them knowing that!!).

The reason many children don't leave home is because they can freeload at home

ozzieeagle

I think your correct about the Ethnic part.... thing is it seems to have rubbed off on the Aussies around these parts as well.. I was wondering if it was a particuarly Melbourne Northern Suburbs thing. I'm quite amazed at how many people and how much people give their kids around these parts.... Cars, house deposits, fully paid 60K weddings etc etc, all seemingly whilst living at home and not paying rent. My kids feel quite hard done by in comparison, and complain quite loudly about it.

I did a thorough check last night at work, and I'm the only Parent that charges rent.... thats out of 7 parents, two of whom are Aussies... the rest Italians and Greeks.

macy

Mine will be paying rent when they are old enough and working after they leave school, my 13 year old thought he would earn around 40 an hour at macdonalds frying chips, he was gobsmacked when I put him straight he has a big learning curve the next few years.