The Offside Rule Explained For Women
Feb 1st 2006 | 5:43 pm
#1
Thread Starter
Forum Regular
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 81
From: Tyneside
The Offside Rule Explained For Women
The "offside rule" explained for women...
You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till.
Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you must have.
The female shopper in front of you has seen them also & is eyeing them with desire.
Both of you have forgotten your purses.
It would be rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.
The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.
Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma. She prepares to throw her purse to you. If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes!
At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and, "whilst it is in flight" you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes!
BUT, you must always remember that until the purse has "actually been thrown", it would be plain wrong to be in front of the other shopper!
NOW DO YOU GET IT?!!
You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till.
Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you must have.
The female shopper in front of you has seen them also & is eyeing them with desire.
Both of you have forgotten your purses.
It would be rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.
The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.
Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma. She prepares to throw her purse to you. If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes!
At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and, "whilst it is in flight" you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes!
BUT, you must always remember that until the purse has "actually been thrown", it would be plain wrong to be in front of the other shopper!
NOW DO YOU GET IT?!!
Feb 1st 2006 | 5:45 pm
#2
CA to TX to Jamaica
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 4,887
From: Location, Location.
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
Simplicity itself!!! Thank you!
Feb 1st 2006 | 6:06 pm
#3
Crazy Cat Lady
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 65,493
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
Originally Posted by OBI WAN
The "offside rule" explained for women...
You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till.
Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you must have.
The female shopper in front of you has seen them also & is eyeing them with desire.
Both of you have forgotten your purses.
It would be rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.
The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.
Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma. She prepares to throw her purse to you. If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes!
At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and, "whilst it is in flight" you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes!
BUT, you must always remember that until the purse has "actually been thrown", it would be plain wrong to be in front of the other shopper!
NOW DO YOU GET IT?!!
You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till.
Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you must have.
The female shopper in front of you has seen them also & is eyeing them with desire.
Both of you have forgotten your purses.
It would be rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.
The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.
Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma. She prepares to throw her purse to you. If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes!
At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and, "whilst it is in flight" you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes!
BUT, you must always remember that until the purse has "actually been thrown", it would be plain wrong to be in front of the other shopper!
NOW DO YOU GET IT?!!
Feb 1st 2006 | 6:34 pm
#4
Australia's Doorman
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 11,057
From: The Shoalhaven, New South Wales, Australia
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
I'm a bloke. I fully understand the off-side rule. What I don't get is why anyone could get any enjoyment from a game that's played by wankers and (largely) supported by tools.
Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.
Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.
Feb 1st 2006 | 6:51 pm
#5
Going for a ride
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 2,838
From: Monbulk, Victoria.
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
Originally Posted by Hutch
I'm a bloke. I fully understand the off-side rule. What I don't get is why anyone could get any enjoyment from a game that's played by wankers and (largely) supported by tools.
Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.
Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.
What really gets up my nose, is the wankers earn massive salaries as well.
and the tools pay a fortune to watch the wankers.
Feb 1st 2006 | 6:54 pm
#6
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 1,451
From: Eldorado (near Wangaratta) 'country Victoria'
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
Glad that you explained it to me as I need to know what is going on on the pitch to help the boss when Holland start their path to winning the World Cup
Nicky
Nicky
Feb 1st 2006 | 6:57 pm
#7
Rocket Scientist
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 6,911
From: Dreamland AKA Brisbane which is a different country to the UK
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
Originally Posted by Hutch
I'm a bloke. I fully understand the off-side rule. What I don't get is why anyone could get any enjoyment from a game that's played by wankers and (largely) supported by tools.
Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.
Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.
Feb 1st 2006 | 7:23 pm
#8
.
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 21,376
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
Originally Posted by Hutch
I'm a bloke. I fully understand the off-side rule. What I don't get is why anyone could get any enjoyment from a game that's played by wankers and (largely) supported by tools.
Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.
Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.
Feb 1st 2006 | 8:05 pm
#9
Crazy Cat Lady
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 65,493
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
Originally Posted by MrsDagboy
So what code are we talking about here? How many codes have an offside rule?
It's a sad game, played everywhere, but no where near as entertaining as AFL
Feb 1st 2006 | 8:13 pm
#10
Account Closed
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,375
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
In one sentance I have managed to go off you for life ...
A real pity.
A real pity.
Originally Posted by Hutch
I'm a bloke. I fully understand the off-side rule. What I don't get is why anyone could get any enjoyment from a game that's played by wankers and (largely) supported by tools.
Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.
Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.
Feb 1st 2006 | 8:14 pm
#11
Account Closed
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,375
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
In one sentance I have managed to go off you for life ...
A real pity.
A real pity.
Originally Posted by furkew
I couldn't agree with you more.
What really gets up my nose, is the wankers earn massive salaries as well.
and the tools pay a fortune to watch the wankers.
What really gets up my nose, is the wankers earn massive salaries as well.
and the tools pay a fortune to watch the wankers.
Feb 1st 2006 | 8:14 pm
#12
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 5,940
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
Originally Posted by Hutch
I'm a bloke. I fully understand the off-side rule. What I don't get is why anyone could get any enjoyment from a game that's played by wankers and (largely) supported by tools.
Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.
Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.
Feb 1st 2006 | 8:16 pm
#13
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 5,940
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
Originally Posted by NickyP
Glad that you explained it to me as I need to know what is going on on the pitch to help the boss when Holland start their path to winning the World Cup
Nicky
Nicky
Feb 1st 2006 | 8:23 pm
#14
Banned
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 96
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
Ah, the beautiful game. The offside rule explained for the weeker sex. Gotta love it.
Feb 1st 2006 | 8:25 pm
#15
Account Closed
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,375
Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
It's not for girls ...
