Say for example there was a really big box of Maltesers on sale in the shop and there was a printed bit that said "Just for you" on it... (so you knew you couldn't share)... would you buy it?

And if you did, when would you stop? 5 balls... 10?

Half a box with a bucket on the side?

Hypothetically, should one actually buy said box... what would be Malteser etiquette when under instruction from manufacturer to not share?

ALWAYS follow the manufacturer's instructions

are you being filthy?

No.

I wouldn't start.

I don't know what this means.

What do you want to do? I don't eat chocolate so my answers may not be relevant.

I think MP what I want to do is eat an entire box of Maltesers without being ill.

Yes, BS I am being filthy. It's one of those Malteser fantasies only indulged in by the very twisted and the dieting.

I am one of those things.

Mmmm... Maltesers. Nom nom nom.

My Mum (and in fact all of us) loves Maltesers and we'd always have a couple of boxes around at Christmas, and we had an annual Christmas competition seeing who could fit the most Maltesers into our cheeks I'm not really sure how that tradition started but it did.

It was all good until the husband came on the scene and spent his first Christmas with my family. That's when I discovered he is in fact a hamster cheeked man. Who knew?! He totally kicked all of our arses at the Malteser game

I love maltesers- especially seeing how long I could make one last.

Sadly, I can no longer eat them as they contain gluten.

Ok, so here's what you do. You buy the Jumbo Economy sized box of Maltesers. Then you wrap them nicely in plain brown paper and send them directly via express post to me. In doing so you don't have to stress yourself with dilemmas such as whether to share or whether to eat only some and save the rest, etc. I will more than happily bear the burden of your Malteser-related woes.

Thank-you Dorothy. It's good to know there are people ready to help in times of need. Should you ever have similar problems with anything... say Ferrero Rocher's for example... let me know and I'll be there for you.

i wouldnt buy it. 99.99% carbs.

So, the rest is dairy?

I'm in training. My body needs carbs.

I am also suddenly overwhelmed by a desire to exercise.

So, essentially, Dorothy, what I think you are saying is - if one was to walk, say, to the confectionary aisle (some distance from the entry to the supermarket) the need to replenish carbohydrates would probably be such that maybe even two boxes of Maltesers would be required.

If one was to do an entire weeks/fortnights shop, before entering the confectionery aisle - Aisle 3 I am reliably informed (if in Woolies) one could possibly ascertain that perhaps 4 boxes of Maltesers would be required to up one's carb intake to a safe amount. Also, if one parked as far away from said retail outlet, one could possibly justify doubling the said amount of boxes. Just a thought.