Homesickness
Sep 1st 2007 | 7:36 pm
#46
Keeping it fairly real
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 32,863
From: In the sun
Re: Homesickness
You know what, even after 3.5 years here I am still feeling as unsettled as I did when I landed.
I don't believe it's anything to do with mindset at all; I have worked my butt off trying to settle. I CANNOT do anything more. I WANTED to make this work. I can see how fantastic life is for my kids. I can see how relaxed my Hubby is everyday. I can see all of the good things that are here, believe me.
Homesickness, and people sickness, hits you like a tonne of bricks. I don't understand why it affected me in this way. I am not one of those people who was extremely close to my family. I only have a very small family who we would only see once every few weeks, if that. Don't get me wrong I love them dearly, but never felt the need to be with them every day.
I am also not one of those people that have never left the town they were born in. I left home at 18 to work at a holiday camp as a Red Coat, moved around quite a bit after that, so I've never clung onto my roots. I've always thrived on spontaneity and adventure and never been afraid to try new things.
So why did it effect me? I haven't got a damn clue. I wish I did, then I could find the answer and change it, and YES, I would stay in Australia because this is where my kids and husband are happy. But, this life I'm living here is making me ill. I am now doped up to the eyeballs on anti-depressants
some days I find it hard to function. I never felt like this before I came here. I feel like a pathetic failure when I read posts like the OP's. No offence to you and the others who've settled, but I just want to scream "Why did you settle and I can't?"
So please don't judge me, or anyone else that suffers with this *ucking awful feeling, because, believe me, I would give anything to settle in Australia.
I don't believe it's anything to do with mindset at all; I have worked my butt off trying to settle. I CANNOT do anything more. I WANTED to make this work. I can see how fantastic life is for my kids. I can see how relaxed my Hubby is everyday. I can see all of the good things that are here, believe me.
Homesickness, and people sickness, hits you like a tonne of bricks. I don't understand why it affected me in this way. I am not one of those people who was extremely close to my family. I only have a very small family who we would only see once every few weeks, if that. Don't get me wrong I love them dearly, but never felt the need to be with them every day.
I am also not one of those people that have never left the town they were born in. I left home at 18 to work at a holiday camp as a Red Coat, moved around quite a bit after that, so I've never clung onto my roots. I've always thrived on spontaneity and adventure and never been afraid to try new things.
So why did it effect me? I haven't got a damn clue. I wish I did, then I could find the answer and change it, and YES, I would stay in Australia because this is where my kids and husband are happy. But, this life I'm living here is making me ill. I am now doped up to the eyeballs on anti-depressants
some days I find it hard to function. I never felt like this before I came here. I feel like a pathetic failure when I read posts like the OP's. No offence to you and the others who've settled, but I just want to scream "Why did you settle and I can't?"So please don't judge me, or anyone else that suffers with this *ucking awful feeling, because, believe me, I would give anything to settle in Australia.
Sep 1st 2007 | 7:43 pm
#47
Thread Starter
Australian Citizen
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 7,810
From: Elsternwick/Melbourne
Re: Homesickness
You know what, even after 3.5 years here I am still feeling as unsettled as I did when I landed.
I don't believe it's anything to do with mindset at all; I have worked my butt off trying to settle. I CANNOT do anything more. I WANTED to make this work. I can see how fantastic life is for my kids. I can see how relaxed my Hubby is everyday. I can see all of the good things that are here, believe me.
Homesickness, and people sickness, hits you like a tonne of bricks. I don't understand why it affected me in this way. I am not one of those people who was extremely close to my family. I only have a very small family who we would only see once every few weeks, if that. Don't get me wrong I love them dearly, but never felt the need to be with them every day.
I am also not one of those people that have never left the town they were born in. I left home at 18 to work at a holiday camp as a Red Coat, moved around quite a bit after that, so I've never clung onto my roots. I've always thrived on spontaneity and adventure and never been afraid to try new things.
So why did it effect me? I haven't got a damn clue. I wish I did, then I could find the answer and change it, and YES, I would stay in Australia because this is where my kids and husband are happy. But, this life I'm living here is making me ill. I am now doped up to the eyeballs on anti-depressants some days I find it hard to function. I never felt like this before I came here. I feel like a pathetic failure when I read posts like the OP's. No offence to you and the others who've settled, but I just want to scream "Why did you settle and I can't?"
So please don't judge me, or anyone else that suffers with this *ucking awful feeling, because, believe me, I would give anything to settle in Australia.
I don't believe it's anything to do with mindset at all; I have worked my butt off trying to settle. I CANNOT do anything more. I WANTED to make this work. I can see how fantastic life is for my kids. I can see how relaxed my Hubby is everyday. I can see all of the good things that are here, believe me.
Homesickness, and people sickness, hits you like a tonne of bricks. I don't understand why it affected me in this way. I am not one of those people who was extremely close to my family. I only have a very small family who we would only see once every few weeks, if that. Don't get me wrong I love them dearly, but never felt the need to be with them every day.
I am also not one of those people that have never left the town they were born in. I left home at 18 to work at a holiday camp as a Red Coat, moved around quite a bit after that, so I've never clung onto my roots. I've always thrived on spontaneity and adventure and never been afraid to try new things.
So why did it effect me? I haven't got a damn clue. I wish I did, then I could find the answer and change it, and YES, I would stay in Australia because this is where my kids and husband are happy. But, this life I'm living here is making me ill. I am now doped up to the eyeballs on anti-depressants
some days I find it hard to function. I never felt like this before I came here. I feel like a pathetic failure when I read posts like the OP's. No offence to you and the others who've settled, but I just want to scream "Why did you settle and I can't?"So please don't judge me, or anyone else that suffers with this *ucking awful feeling, because, believe me, I would give anything to settle in Australia.
What I am trying to put across, it that some posts/threads here lead people to believe they SHOULD expect it to happen - which isn't fair, as it can get into peoples psyche.
It isn't something I can understand ...hence the reason for the thread - to discuss it.
Sep 1st 2007 | 7:46 pm
#48
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,280
From: WA
Re: Homesickness
You know what, even after 3.5 years here I am still feeling as unsettled as I did when I landed.
I don't believe it's anything to do with mindset at all; I have worked my butt off trying to settle. I CANNOT do anything more. I WANTED to make this work. I can see how fantastic life is for my kids. I can see how relaxed my Hubby is everyday. I can see all of the good things that are here, believe me.
Homesickness, and people sickness, hits you like a tonne of bricks. I don't understand why it affected me in this way. I am not one of those people who was extremely close to my family. I only have a very small family who we would only see once every few weeks, if that. Don't get me wrong I love them dearly, but never felt the need to be with them every day.
I am also not one of those people that have never left the town they were born in. I left home at 18 to work at a holiday camp as a Red Coat, moved around quite a bit after that, so I've never clung onto my roots. I've always thrived on spontaneity and adventure and never been afraid to try new things.
So why did it effect me? I haven't got a damn clue. I wish I did, then I could find the answer and change it, and YES, I would stay in Australia because this is where my kids and husband are happy. But, this life I'm living here is making me ill. I am now doped up to the eyeballs on anti-depressants some days I find it hard to function. I never felt like this before I came here. I feel like a pathetic failure when I read posts like the OP's. No offence to you and the others who've settled, but I just want to scream "Why did you settle and I can't?"
So please don't judge me, or anyone else that suffers with this *ucking awful feeling, because, believe me, I would give anything to settle in Australia.
I don't believe it's anything to do with mindset at all; I have worked my butt off trying to settle. I CANNOT do anything more. I WANTED to make this work. I can see how fantastic life is for my kids. I can see how relaxed my Hubby is everyday. I can see all of the good things that are here, believe me.
Homesickness, and people sickness, hits you like a tonne of bricks. I don't understand why it affected me in this way. I am not one of those people who was extremely close to my family. I only have a very small family who we would only see once every few weeks, if that. Don't get me wrong I love them dearly, but never felt the need to be with them every day.
I am also not one of those people that have never left the town they were born in. I left home at 18 to work at a holiday camp as a Red Coat, moved around quite a bit after that, so I've never clung onto my roots. I've always thrived on spontaneity and adventure and never been afraid to try new things.
So why did it effect me? I haven't got a damn clue. I wish I did, then I could find the answer and change it, and YES, I would stay in Australia because this is where my kids and husband are happy. But, this life I'm living here is making me ill. I am now doped up to the eyeballs on anti-depressants
some days I find it hard to function. I never felt like this before I came here. I feel like a pathetic failure when I read posts like the OP's. No offence to you and the others who've settled, but I just want to scream "Why did you settle and I can't?"So please don't judge me, or anyone else that suffers with this *ucking awful feeling, because, believe me, I would give anything to settle in Australia.
That's a very brave post, karma sent.
S xx
Sep 1st 2007 | 7:48 pm
#50
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 28,998
Re: Homesickness
It's a bit like saying to expect morning sickness when you find out you're pregnant. Not everyone experiences it but some do.
Sep 1st 2007 | 7:49 pm
#51
BE Forum Addict
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 1,764
From: UTOPIA, QLD
Re: Homesickness
Was your homesick feeling for people or the place though?
I think there is a big difference in missing someone and wanting to go back.
For instance if you went back just because you wanted to pop down your mates house, then you'd also want to come straight back here once you'd seen them.
Missing the place means that you wouldn't want to come back here.
Does that make sense?
It's probably hard for those of us who haven't felt like that to understand what 'homesickness' is really.
I think there is a big difference in missing someone and wanting to go back.
For instance if you went back just because you wanted to pop down your mates house, then you'd also want to come straight back here once you'd seen them.
Missing the place means that you wouldn't want to come back here.
Does that make sense?
It's probably hard for those of us who haven't felt like that to understand what 'homesickness' is really.
Sep 1st 2007 | 7:55 pm
#52
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 28,175
From: at the bottom of a wine glass
Re: Homesickness
Wendy, I don't get it bad like some people. Normally I am a happy person but I expect that I can't be up all the time and a down side must occur. This could be it and I'm calling it homesick. I don't know. But I would like my close friends and family nearer so I could drop in and just talk shit but I know thats not possible so I've just got to live with it.
See that to me is people sickness, I have that every now and again. But I don't want to go back the the UK - the thought scares the pants off me
You'll find new buddies that you can drop in on and talk shit with
Not same as old friends and family, but close enough
Sep 1st 2007 | 7:56 pm
#53
Thread Starter
Australian Citizen
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 7,810
From: Elsternwick/Melbourne
Sep 1st 2007 | 8:11 pm
#56
Thread Starter
Australian Citizen
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 7,810
From: Elsternwick/Melbourne
Sep 1st 2007 | 8:22 pm
#57
Account Closed
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 10,158
Re: Homesickness
I do have a desire to meet other British people. I find it really pleasant to sit in a restaurant and hear a Northern Ireland accent, for example, like the other week when I was out. It was only on hearing it I realised how 'sing song' and pleasant it was... I'd not thought about it until I heard it. I've struck up conversations with a lot of British people since living up here. I like that natural ease which you can fall into a really deep conversation which you can miss sometimes with Australian people.I've been down to Sydney to meet people and invited people round here...I don't do it with any regularity but it's nice to meet someone who you're not explaining yourself to.
I can be with my extended Australian family, and they may all be laughing at a joke which then has to be explained to me because I'm not an Aussie and I don't have that shared history.
It's nice to mix with other Brits who inherently understand what the hell you're yacking about... it's 'easy' company.
Saying that, I have some amazing Australian friends, who are so totally accepting. It's good, but different.
Sep 1st 2007 | 8:28 pm
#58
Crazy Cat Lady
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 65,493
Re: Homesickness
I haven't had it and none of the family have. Miss people occasionally and first born missed her friends really badly for the first six months but then she didn't want to come anyway. When we came out to Perth 20 odd years ago, I hadn't even got to the SIL's house before wanting to go back, really missed England. Now I love England but love it here more.
I find the "you will suffer homesickness after 3 months" similar to "you will suffer jetlag" - I've never had that either I have no idea why some would suffer and others don't. From reading stuff on here, some don't even get it until they've been here 10 years plus. Is that homesickness or just a vague yearning for something else and homesickness is an easy term.
Home is where WE are, for 4 days in November 2005 home was either an aeroplane or a hotel in Singapore
I find the "you will suffer homesickness after 3 months" similar to "you will suffer jetlag" - I've never had that either
I have no idea why some would suffer and others don't. From reading stuff on here, some don't even get it until they've been here 10 years plus. Is that homesickness or just a vague yearning for something else and homesickness is an easy term.Home is where WE are, for 4 days in November 2005 home was either an aeroplane or a hotel in Singapore
Sep 1st 2007 | 8:33 pm
#59
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 5,133
Re: Homesickness
I haven't had it and none of the family have. Miss people occasionally and first born missed her friends really badly for the first six months but then she didn't want to come anyway. When we came out to Perth 20 odd years ago, I hadn't even got to the SIL's house before wanting to go back, really missed England. Now I love England but love it here more.
I find the "you will suffer homesickness after 3 months" similar to "you will suffer jetlag" - I've never had that either I have no idea why some would suffer and others don't. From reading stuff on here, some don't even get it until they've been here 10 years plus. Is that homesickness or just a vague yearning for something else and homesickness is an easy term.
Home is where WE are, for 4 days in November 2005 home was either an aeroplane or a hotel in Singapore
I find the "you will suffer homesickness after 3 months" similar to "you will suffer jetlag" - I've never had that either
I have no idea why some would suffer and others don't. From reading stuff on here, some don't even get it until they've been here 10 years plus. Is that homesickness or just a vague yearning for something else and homesickness is an easy term.Home is where WE are, for 4 days in November 2005 home was either an aeroplane or a hotel in Singapore
