The Reef's flowing tonight......

....and I'm stuck in babysitting.......and......

in or out?

....I just noticed my post counts 943, so.......

in one end, out the other

Oh here we go...........



I'll talk pish wi ya


I'm just looking for jokes but can't find any good ones. Have you got any

....tonight, I'll postly be posting pish to get my post count up to 1000

yep, me too. Mr HP is away, just settled the bub and now sat down with a glass of wine. For some reason I'm watching celebrity ice skating (never seen it before) I thought the first couple looked really good then realised it was Torvill & Dean )

Has to be done mate

Here goes.....

Three kids come down to the kitchen and sit around the breakfast table. The mother asks the oldest boy what he’d like to eat. "I’ll have some f*****’ French toast," he says. The mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs. She asks the middle child what he wants. "Well, I guess that leaves more f*****’ French toast for me," he says. She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away. Finally she asks the youngest son what he wants for breakfast. "I don’t know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don’t want the f****' French toast."

Don't you think Chris Dean's looking pretty good these days? Or is that just the alcohol speaking?

PMSL Few more needed

My pleasure......

guy joins a monastery and takes a vow of silence: he’s allowed to say two words every seven years. After the first seven years, the elders bring him in and ask for his two words. "Cold floors," he says. They nod and send him away. Seven more years pass. They bring him back in and ask for his two words. He clears his throats and says, "Bad food." They nod and send him away. Seven more years pass. They bring him in for his two words. "I quit," he says. "That’s not surprising," the elders say. "You’ve done nothing but complain since you got here."

LOL - I would say ask me again in an hour but unfortunately I'm limited half a glass so he probably won't look any better then.

I've not had a drink for quite a few weeks so I'm on a mission tonight - in another hour I'll be seeing two of him

A man and a woman are riding next to each other in first class. The man sneezes, pulls out his wang and wipes the tip off. The woman can't believe what she just saw and decides she is hallucinating. A few minutes pass. The man sneezes again. He pulls out his wang and wipes the tip off. The woman is about to go nuts. She can't believe that such a rude person exists. A few minutes pass. The man sneezes yet again. He takes his wang out and wipes the tip off. The woman has finally had enough. She turns to the man and says, "Three times you've sneezed, and three times you've removed your penis from your pants to wipe it off! What the hell kind of degenerate are you?"

The man replies, "I am sorry to have disturbed you ma'am. I have a very rare condition such that when I sneeze, I have an orgasm."

The woman then says, "Oh, how strange. What are you taking for it?"

The man looks at her and says, "Pepper."