gorgeousgal

Have looked into things and I can get a visa with no problem (nurse), although it will take a bit longer. I'm just not sure I can do it on my own with the two kids We were looking forward to it so much that I feel I should give it a go, but I'm scared
Also, my "ex" (can't get used to that!) says he's still going to Oz with his new woman. He doesn't seem particularly bothered which hemisphere his kids are in
Can't believe this has happened to me. It's like something out of a soap!
Thanks for your replies, you're nice people And, don't worry, I'm a tough bird - I'll cope! AND, I'm not fat OR ugly..........so there

Streaks

with a username like yours I didn't think for one minute you were sounds like you also have a great personality which will help carry you through this - Good Luck
S xx

Sam

Good for you Gorseousgal (sorry if i spelt that wrong)

i SAY GO FOR IT

I know its easy for me to say as i'm already here but if something happened between us, hey so i wouldn't head back home and admit defeat!!

My girls have so much more of a better life here then they would ever have had in the UK, personally for my children i have made the better choice for them! and at this stage of the game they are the important ones!


if you can apply under your own steam then personally i would have a go, you have to learn to realy on friends that you have just met rather then family or people you have know for years but you learn to trust those you haven't known long and most of them are good!

Timber Floor Au

Its his PEOPLE SKILLS that has caused this !

Timber Floor Au

He wont get in with her.

Defacto have to prove co-habitation for an extended period.

Fly Away

So pleased to hear that you have skills in demand and have started to look into it!

I'm pretty sure that your ex's bit on the side can't just go along with him. They will have to apply from scratch and prove their relationship as he is married to you. Hmmm. You can laugh now as it will be much harder for him to get the visa now!

You sound like a strong person and whatever you decide is achieveable! Have you seen the posts by Daunted? She is going it alone with 2 kids too. It is harder on your own, but if it is your dream then go for it!

Where are you headed? BE is a great resource for networking and information. Go to meets, make friends with people going to the same area as you. Talk o people already there. Doing all these things will make you feel more confident.

Good luck!

gorgeousgal

They're both doctors, so I guess she'll be getting her own visa.

s-jmelbournewannabe

wanker, so sorry for you and the kids, get your own visa and leave him standing!! xx S-j xx

gorgeousgal

:curse:You know that saying: "trust me, I'm a Doctor"?


Well.........DON'T:curse:

s-jmelbournewannabe

Theres a dead nice lass on here who's off to Oz on her own with her kids... you will have to be brave. but think of the adventure and how proud your kids will be of you when there older!

JenniGee

I don't know you, but felt I had to post & offer my sympathies. It's an awful, awful time & as you say, he didn't have to be so nasty about you in the process.

I was in the same situation a few years back, my ex was bonking my (alleged) friend. I really think that they say this awful stuff to try & make you feel bad about yourself & start taking some of the blame about the situation.

DON'T YOU DARE!!!

He wants to make you feel guilty so that he can justify his own terrible behaviour, remember that. And if you are a bit cuddly round the edges - so what? I'll bet you have two gorgeous kids to show for that wobbliness, so be proud

Myself - well, only 4 years on & myself & my wonderful new partner are keeping our dreams alive & going through the process now, although my appointment with the solicitor this morning regarding the kids didn't bring good news... it's going to be a long old haul for us too....

So it looks like I'll be here to keep you all company for a long while yet - so chin up, don't give up & have belief in yourself.

And yes - talk to that visa agent about your skills & what you can do in your own right, although the kids may well be an issue, it is for us - we have Aussie Immigration points coming out of our ears, but they ain't worth a thing without the ex's consent :curse:

Very best of luck to you!

Just read back - you're a nurse? You'll obviously be fine! He's thinking of going without you anyway? Great - get him to sign a consent order for the kids before he goes & then you can keep your options open - though as others have rightly said, he's going to have to wait 12 months to be able to prove a relationship, which he can't do if he's still married to you - looks like you have some great bargaining chips there!

Fly Away

I don't think Dr's are on the demand list............ I could be wrong, (maybe I'm thinking of GPs not specialists), but I thought it was nurses who were in demand? So you may still have a really good chance of getting your visa easier than the bit on the side!

In fact, don't give their visa one thought unless you and the kids were on it and it has been lodged already!

Good luck again. You deserve it!

sasbear

Ar**hoile - sorry - I know you love/loved him -keep strong and keep posting on here - loads of really nice people on here to give a shoulder to you.

gorgeousgal

Thankyou all so much for your kind words (and nasty words about HIM!!).
It's a bit strange telling a load of people you don't know all your problems, but it's making me feel a lot better. I haven't even told my friends yet, as I've got to tell the kids. Not sure how to put it to them, they love their Daddy and are already asking where he is. He's only been gone two days, so I said he's working, but I have to tell them at some stage. He's definately not coming back - & to be honest I wouldn't want him back.

Fly Away

2 days. Gosh you're in the very early days. Wishing you the strength to get through this. As another poster said, you have a lot of bargaining chips. Make sure that you get what you and the kids need and want out of this situation.

Good luck telling your kids. It must be the hardest thing in the World. Tell them the truth - don't try to protect them with half truths, they will find out in the end. I don't know if I could do it, but try not to 'bad mouth' their Dad to them. Let them form their own judgements. Bloomin difficult I know. Just give them loads of love and reassurance.

Sending you a big hug. (((((((())))))))